Chapter 2: Somewhere Only We Know
Friendship. Does it actually exist… or is it just another thing that we humans fabricate in order to make ourselves feel better about needing social contact?
Are friends even needed? When the chips are down, who's there for you, ultimately?
"Wow, you know you guys, I just can't wait until after school today, when I get to see Mr. Garrison for an extra two hours. I must be the luckiest guy in the whole freakin' school. Oh wait, Kahl is coming too, that's double amazing for me!" Cartman said sarcastically, his eyes shooting daggers at Kyle as he ate his sandwich.
"Fuck off, fat ass, it's not my fault you got detention for being an idiot and yelling in class," Kyle said coldly, not even looking in his direction. The four friends, accompanied by Butters, sat at their lunch table in the middle of the cafeteria.
"Yeah? Well if you hadn't thrown the paper at me, I wouldn't have yelled!" Cartman retorted angrily.
"And if you had minded your own business, I wouldn't have thrown it at you in the first place!" Kyle snapped, lowering his sandwich and eyeing Cartman from across the table.
"Seriously, guys, give it a fucking rest," Kenny said, sounding bored. He flipped a pencil between his fingers and stared across the room, at a table where a bunch of girls sat. One of them noticed his staring and waved; he smiled and winked back at her, causing much squealing from their side of the cafeteria.
"Gee, uh, how do you do that Kenny? Make the girl's all happy and whatnot just by smilin'?" Butters asked innocently, watching Kenny intently with his large, blue eyes. Kenny glanced at him and rolled his eyes.
"It's a gift, Butters. You're either born with it, or not," he answered flatly, running his fingers through his hair. He glanced briefly at Stan, then let out an enormous sigh. "Stan, if you stare any harder, your eyes will pop out."
Stan seemed to have just realized his friends were talking to him; he jumped slightly and faced Kenny, looking surprised. "Oh… uh sorry… just distracted."
Kenny frowned. "By Wendy. Again. Just let her go, man, you're driving all of us fucking crazy."
"I wasn't distracted by fucking Wendy! I was thinking about something!" Stan said defensively, looking between his four friends for some understanding.
"What have you been thinking about so much lately?" Kyle asked, genuinely wondering. He had no idea what was up with his best friend these days- he spent a lot of time staring blankly into space and sighing.
Stan turned to face him, then immediately looked away, "It-it's nothing," he said curtly, making an obvious effort not to look at Kyle.
Kyle was getting annoyed with Stan's behavior, and was about to say something, when his least favorite person in the entire world just had to interrupt.
"Lover's quarrel?"
"Fuck off, tubby!" Kyle yelled automatically, turning toward Cartman.
"Not my fault you can't handle your relationships, Kahl," Cartman replied, smiling. Kyle's insides burned.
Before Kyle could retort, Kenny jumped in, "Just ignore him, Kyle. It's not our fault he's so sexually frustrated he takes his anger out on us."
Kyle and Butters laughed, while Stan wasn't paying attention again. He was staring intently at Kyle.
"Kenny, what the hell! You're supposed to be on my side, you dumb fuck!" Cartman glared angrily at Kenny as Kenny smiled amusedly back.
"Well, I'm just getting sick of your behavior, Cartman. Maybe if you actually located your dick and figured out how to use it, you wouldn't be so angry all the time."
At this, Stan smiled along with Kyle. Butters glanced worriedly at Cartman, afraid of his reaction.
"You fucking poor piece of shit! You want to die now?!" Cartman said angrily, throwing his Coke can at Kenny's head.
Kenny dodged it with ease and stood up, crunching his brown paper bag into a little ball and tossing it into the garbage can next to Cartman. He glanced back at the table.
"Butters, wanna go finish that chemistry homework?" Kenny smiled. Butters shot a quick look at Cartman, then stood up.
"See you later, Eric! Have fun in detention!" Butters smiled happily and followed Kenny out of the lunch room. Cartman fumed.
"God damnit, why the hell did he have to fucking remind me?! Argh!" Cartman growled and banged his head against the table. Kyle took no notice, as he looked at his best friend with worried eyes.
"Seriously dude… what is it?" Kyle asked quietly, his eyes searching Stan for some kind of answer.
"It's nothing, I just haven't been sleeping much lately, Kyle," Stan answered, looking across the lunch room.
Kyle's insides turned, "Because of Wendy?"
Stan didn't answer, instead he looked back at Kyle with sad eyes.
God, it's always that fucking bitch's fault! What the hell did Stan do to deserve all of this shit from her?! Kyle thought angrily.
"No, Kyle, it's not Wendy…" Kyle glanced back up at Stan and was met with his sad-looking hazel eyes. They seemed to be trying to tell Kyle something, but he couldn't decipher the message.
"What is it?" Kyle asked softly.
"If you two are done having your fucking gay-ass moment, I'm going to chemistry," Cartman said curtly; his seat screeched against the tiled floor beneath him as he stood up huffily.
Kyle turned toward him and spat, "Fuck off, Cartman! Enough with the fucking gay comments, okay?!"
Cartman snorted and picked up his tray, "It's not my fault you two were staring longingly into each other's eyes like some fucking movie! If you don't like how I point it out, then stop being so gay, you homos!" He turned his back toward Kyle and began to walk out of the cafeteria.
"GOD DAMN YOU, CARTMAN!" Kyle yelled hotly, standing up in his seat. Cartman didn't even turn around as he stuck a hand behind his head and flipped Kyle off. The lunch bell rang through the cafeteria as the surrounding students stood up and deposited their trash.
"Fucking asshole…" Kyle muttered, glancing back at Stan, who remained seated. "Can you believe him? I mean really-"
"I'm not going to next period," Stan said quickly as he stood up and slung his bag over his shoulder.
Kyle blinked and watched his friend throw his tray in the garbage can. "Why?"
"…I just don't feel like it, okay? Later dude," Stan hid his face as he quickly walked out of the room, leaving Kyle standing by himself in the crowds of students.
"Why the hell do I have to be stuck fucking cleaning?!" Cartman said angrily as he picked up a loose sheet of paper from the floor and stuffed it in a large, black plastic bag. Kyle sighed and turned his back to Cartman, sick of hearing him complain.
They had only been in detention for two minutes when Mr. Garrison decided to make better use of their time, they would be cleaning the classroom, while Mr. Garrison went down the street to Starbucks to grab himself mocha.
Kyle squirted a spray bottle he took from the janitor on the blackboard and wiped it with a rag. He was still angry at Cartman from earlier; he was afraid if he said anything, their argument would end with a chair flying through the window.
"I mean, damnit! We have fucking janitors, why the hell does he make the students do it?!" Cartman threw his almost-filled trash bag to the floor and walked over to a desk in the front row. He sat down and put his head against the table, sighing heavily. "This is such a waste of my time… I could be playing videogames right now, but nooo…" he muttered angrily.
Kyle bit his tongue to keep himself from saying something he would regret, and continued to wipe at the blackboard. His thoughts wandered to Stan earlier, and his severe reaction to Cartman's taunting.
I'm sure that's why he ran out earlier and didn't come to chemistry… Kyle thought angrily, vigorously scrubbing a remaining marker doodle on the board. I mean, he was… slightly okay before Cartman went and acted like… well, Cartman. God damnit I just can't stand him sometimes.
But Stan… what's wrong with him? Ever since Monday, he's been acting weird. Well, for the last two weeks he's been acting weird. But I just figured that was because Wendy dumped him again. But he says it's definitely not Wendy that's bothering him now… Did I miss something?
I'm his best friend… how could I not notice something was really wrong sooner? God damnit, I'm so stupid sometimes…
"I know you're a perfectionist, Kahl, but this is just ridiculous," Cartman said from his right. Kyle snapped out of his thoughts as he realized he'd been wiping the same spot on the board for the past few minutes, and not noticed Cartman standing up and leaning against the board next to him. He shot Cartman an angry look and scooted to his left, away from the brown-haired boy. Cartman watched him curiously as he sprayed the board again and started to wipe at it.
"You're thinking about your boyfriend, right?" Cartman asked, smirking while leaning against the blackboard. Kyle frowned and ignored him.
How the hell did he figure that out? Kyle wondered vaguely, determinedly not looking at Cartman. Cartman's smile widened.
"It's pretty obvious, Kahl. You can't stand to be away from him for more than two seconds without completely freaking out," Cartman glanced out the classroom door as a janitor walked by. The sun was setting from the windows, dousing the whole classroom in oranges and reds.
"Shut up, Cartman, I'm really not in the mood…" Kyle said grumpily, backing up from the blackboard to review his handiwork.
"I know, Kahl, that's why I'm bringing it up," Cartman pushed himself off the wall and walked over to where Kyle was, glancing at the board. "It's fun for me. And anyway, could you tell me why Stan has been acting like such a sad ass pussy lately?"
"I don't know," Kyle said, getting seriously annoyed. "Why the hell should I know? I'm only his best friend, and he won't god damn tell me anything. Maybe it's just not my business, or he doesn't think to tell me, I don't know!"
Kyle threw his spray bottle and rag on the floor. Why the hell am I getting so pissed off about it?! It's not like it's my fault he's like this, he thought as he turned on his heel and stomped toward the classroom door.
"Where are you going?" Cartman asked from behind him.
"Home. Away from you. Take your pick," Kyle said angrily.
"It's only four thirty. You really want Mr. Garrison to come back and find you not here? Imagine how that would sound in a call to your mom," Cartman said smartly.
Kyle stopped walking and thought over what Cartman said. He growled, defeated, and walked back toward a desk near the window. He sat on the table bit, causing it to creak a little under his weight, and stared defiantly out the window, never once looking at Cartman.
"…And Stan, he's just on his period because his girlfriend dumped him. Don't take it all so fucking personally," Cartman said.
Kyle glanced over his shoulder, slightly surprised, then quickly back at the red sky out of the window. The snow glistened in the light.
"…then why the hell is he lying to me? I'm supposed to be his best friend," Kyle said quietly, not quite intending for Cartman to hear.
"Who cares? Maybe it's just one of those things that no one would want to tell anybody, and pressing him about it might be making it worse," Cartman said. Kyle glanced back at him and saw Cartman, too, staring out the window.
Kyle sighed, "You're a real asshole, you know that?"
And that's how I ended up here, Kyle thought bitterly. It had taken a lot to convince his mom to let him out past seven o'clock, but when he said it was for Stan because he wasn't feeling well, his mom automatically agreed.
Fucking Cartman… Kyle fumed silently, Now I feel guilty. Shit.
Stan… open up, Kyle hesitated slightly as he brought his hand to the front door and knocked. No response. Kyle rapped on the door again, a little more loudly, and waited.
It began to snow as Kyle waited for a response from the inside. He looked up at the clouds and the snow falling down from the sky. They were the pretty snowflakes this time- the ones that little kids would cut out of paper and sprinkle glitter all over, instead of the hard almost hail-like ones Colorado usually saw. The temperature seemed to drop as Kyle shifted from foot to foot.
Just as Kyle began to raise his hand to knock again, the door creaked open a crack, revealing a very tired-looking Stan.
His best friend stared at him for a moment, his eyes adjusting to the dark outside. "Kyle…" he sounded weary.
"Hey, dude, can I come in?" Kyle asked hesitantly. Stan blinked and opened the door all the way to allow his friend passage. The door clinked behind Kyle as he walked into the living room, looking around for signs of Stan's family.
"Where're your parents?" Kyle asked, glancing back at his friend who was leaning against the wall, looking into the kitchen.
"They're at another one of those work parties. You know," Stan said, rolling his eyes. He pushed himself off the wall and walked toward Kyle. "What're you doing here?"
Kyle was surprised; Stan was acting a little off. He normally would've at least looked… happy to see Kyle. Now, it just felt like Kyle was intruding. Stan had barely looked at him since he walked in the door, almost like he was avoiding looking at him.
"I'm… well, I came to apologize," Kyle started. This caused Stan to look up, a confused expression on his face.
"Apologize? For what?"
"Well…" Where do I begin… Kyle thought, this seemed like a better idea earlier. "Okay… I know that something's wrong with you right now, and you won't tell me what. So, I'm sorry for pressing you about it. Whatever the reason is that you aren't telling anybody, I'm sure it's a good one, and I trust your judgment. And I'm sorry you don't feel like you can trust me, maybe I did something-
"No, Kyle, no… stop it," Stan walked toward his best friend, reaching out his right arm. He patted Kyle's shoulder, a sad look in his eyes, "It's not you, okay? This is just something I have to work out, like I said. Don't blame yourself- please." Stan's eyes seemed to be pleading with Kyle's- the browns and greens in them danced with the fluorescent light from the floor lamp.
Kyle stared at his best friend, not knowing what to make of him. Eventually he sighed, "Okay. But, I'm sorry anyway. And I wish I could do something-
"Kyle, just stop. Don't apologize, you haven't done anything wrong, it's just me… being stupid. I should get over all of it soon , okay? I promise," Stan half smiled through his dark hair and looked up at Kyle, his eyes light. Kyle's heart skipped a beat.
Kyle looked down, suddenly embarrassed by the directness of Stan's gaze, "Fuck, Stan, is that what you do to Bebe? That might be why she keeps asking you out."
Stan laughed and pulled Kyle into a quick hug. "Maybe I should stop smiling then, huh?"
Kyle laughed into Stan's shoulder and returned his embrace, "Yeah. Maybe you should go Goth again- that was great for you."
"Shut up!" Stan said, breaking their hug and bopping Kyle on the head. Kyle's hat fell down over his eyes as he beamed up at his friend.
He seems to be feeling better, I'm glad, Kyle thought, his heart still beating quickly from the look Stan gave him. He really needs to tone that down, though, that look would be enough to turn even Cartman gay…
"So dude, wanna play some videogames? I got Halo," Stan said, walking over to his TV and retrieving the console from underneath it.
"We have school tomorrow, dude," Kyle grinned at him. Stan rolled his eyes and faced Kyle again, holding out a controller for him to use.
"No better time than the present," he said with a smirk. Kyle looked at his best friend for a moment- Stan's eyes light from laughter, his outstretched hand eagerly waiting for Kyle to take the controller. Eventually, Kyle sighed and reached out his hand.