Author's Note: Thanks to everyone for their patience. Things recently went haywire at work, and that did a serious number on my muses. In this chapter, we start learning answers to certain questions. . .while new questions are raised, and I continue to turn Star Wars canon (EU and otherwise) on its head. For anyone who isn't familiar with my stories, one of my most favorite things to do as a writer is completely shake things up. It's more fun that way. I wish I could tell you that I'll have another chapter up soon, but there's just no way to know when the next chapter will be ready. Especially when the muses are being scattershot. In any event, I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. . .as for myself, I'm leaving for Georgia tomorrow for the weekend!
Chapter Three
Ask the Questions, Find the Answers
He made his way down the steps of the dungeon, almost whistling at the damage caused by just two Jedi. While the man had little love for the Jedi, he had even less for the dead man now lying at his feet. In the early weeks of the Jedi's captivity, there were many times when the living man found himself restraining the young man while the dead outlaw beat him. It wasn't that he had any liking for Jedi, but there was no honor in restraining an opponent. Fighting was one thing, but beatings such as the ones he witnessed were quite another.
In addition, the Jedi protected his son. . .for reasons he still didn't know, still didn't understand. What he did understand was that the actions made him indebted to the Jedi, something he didn't like at all. But there was nothing for it. He paid his debts. And speaking of his son. . .the boy was already inside the room where the Jedi was kept for those last several months. He shook his head. . .the boy was just like his mother, always curious. He was grateful that it hadn't gotten them both killed yet.
"Dad, come look at this!" the boy called. Again, the man shook his head, but this time, an affectionate smile touched his lips. The boy was insatiably curious, but he couldn't imagine his life without him. He entered the room cautiously, releasing a small breath of relief. As he hoped, the Jedi no longer lay on the slab, unconscious and tortured by visions only he could see. Once more, he shuddered. He should have never taken this job. . .it was a bad business, from start to finish.
"Obi-Wan got away safely! Look at these burns, the Jedi must have come for him, Dad!" the boy exclaimed, almost chattering with excitement. The hard man allowed himself the luxury of ruffling his son's hair before he began examining the burns that drew the boy's attention. Yes, they did come from a lightsaber. . .of that, there was no doubt. Taken by itself, he would have been cautious in assuming the Jedi came for their missing Knight, but add to that the very dead man outside, he was sure his son was right.
"Looks that way, son. All right. I want you to get back to the ship. . .I'll be along, just as soon as I reprogram the computer. If Sidious comes back, there's a chance he'll realize we sent that distress signal to the Jedi. . .and if that happens, he'll kill us both," the man warned. The boy nodded, looking worried, but did as he was instructed. The father turned back to the console. Less than a week earlier, he stood here and sent out a distress signal, boosted by the power of his own ship. Now, he had to make sure that signal never reached the attention of Sidious, assuming it wasn't too late.
It was possible that it was too late, but he didn't think so. If it was too late, then the young Jedi who had been tortured and beaten here, who had shielded an unknown young boy with his own body and showed him such kindness. . .would now be dead. If Sidious knew about the distress call, his first priority would have been to kill the Jedi. . .and the second, to kill those who betrayed him. The dark-haired man sent that distress signal because as much as he despised the Jedi, he despised his former partner even more. . .and far more than that, he despised being used. Sidious was using him and his son, he was sure of it. Perhaps even meant for them both to die at the end of this mess, once he no longer had use for them.
The process of erasing the logs took no more than five minutes, but he wanted to make sure the job was thorough. He liked being thorough, it was part of what made him so good at his job. Then again, maybe it was time for him to get out of this business, make a new life for himself. And again, he murmured, "A bad business, this was, from start to finish. I should have never gotten involved in this, should have never let my boy near that Jedi." But he had, and he did, and now he had to live with the consequences. However, there was still the promise of damage control.
As the last of the logs were revealed, and he was certain they wouldn't betray him, he prepared to leave. It was so odd, to both despise and owe someone. The Jedi was still a child when the dark-haired man's people were all but wiped out. . .just a few years older than his own boy. This Jedi, who shielded his son with his own body, and received several broken ribs and internal bruising because of his compassion. At that point, he should have killed the outlaw himself, then taken himself, his son, and Jedi far away from this place. Or just killed the Jedi himself. It occurred to him more than once, but he couldn't do that to his son. Not after the Jedi was hurt so badly while protecting the boy. His son had inherited his mother's curiosity, and her empathy. . . two very bad attributes in their line of work.
But it was that curiosity and that empathy which saved his son, at the same time. It was that curiosity and that empathy which led him to reach out to the Jedi. . .who in turn risked his life to save a ten year old boy he didn't know. And that was why he hadn't killed the Jedi. . .because he was the father of twins. While he was trying to provide for his son, the Jedi was trying to make the galaxy safer for his twins. That, he knew, was why the Jedi had protected his son from that beating after the outlaw caught his boy trying to sneak food to the Jedi. Maybe he even wanted to make up for his Master's part in the Battle of Galidraan. But that was all speculation, and he was just a simple bounty hunter, trying to make his way in the galaxy, for himself and for his son.
Jango Fett raised his blaster, and fired a single shot into the machine that tortured an innocent man. Had he and Obi-Wan Kenobi met under different circumstances, they might have killed each other. But because Sidious wanted Kenobi's apprentice alone and vulnerable, to facilitate the young man's fall, Jango instead found himself saving the Jedi's life. But his debt to him wasn't yet paid. For now, however, he had to return to the ship. . .Boba would be worried about him.
SWSWSWSWSWSW
It had been Asajj's original plan to return to her quarters, shower, and then head to her husband's room in the Healer's Wing. However, she didn't even get halfway to her quarters before her brother intercepted her, grabbed her closest wrist, and almost literally dragged her back to the training salles. Not a word was said, but Asajj understood anyhow. Anakin's facial expression made words and explanations totally unnecessary. And for those who couldn't see his face, the way the Force swirled around Anakin warned anyone to stay away.
With that gift that the very young sometimes had, Luke called him 'stormy Ani' when the padawan reached this state, and that was probably the most accurate description she heard. Her little brother was struggling with not only with what was done to Obi-Wan, but also his own reaction. More to the point, he was caught between his desire to take care of Obi-Wan, his need for reassurance, and the almost physical need to find Sidious and hurt him. Badly.
What wasn't as clear to Asajj was what, exactly, triggered this. Obi-Wan's 'amnesia,' for lack of a better word was certainly a large part of it, as well as the obvious hell he was put through during his captivity. That would be hard for Anakin, protective Anakin, to handle. However, while they were all upset right now, she had thought he was dealing with it. Evidently, he was getting better about masking his emotions. Either way, right now, he needed this. He needed to work out his frustration, needed to go up against someone who could match him, possible even best him. Her former Master was taking care of her husband and children, and someone needed to take care of Anakin.
Under normal circumstances, Obi-Wan would be doing that, but right now, he couldn't. Shmi was on Tatooine, helping with her and Cliegg's first grandchild, Vashti. She would come immediately, but really, her Tatooine family needed her more right now than Anakin did. So it fell to her, and Asajj was utterly determined not to fail her family. Moreover, she couldn't allow Anakin near her children until he got this out of his system. Asajj's hearing was almost permanently damaged after the last time a highly-distressed Anakin spent time with Luke and Leia.
So to spare her children's nerves and her own hearing, she stood opposite her brother in the training salle, quietly watching as he prowled back and forth. While she would have never said so, his behavior right now reminded her rather strongly her of caged animals she had seen. Asajj held her tongue, knowing that Anakin would strike when he was ready. At the moment, the youngster was trying to focus. His mood was infecting her, sending adrenaline flowing through her body, and she wanted to fight now as well (again), but someone had to be the adult at the moment. And she was that lucky someone. . .she had the strength and the will to do so.
Anakin stalked away from her, growling under his breath. Asajj tensed, knowing it would be very soon now. She was right. . .as soon as she thumbed on her lightsaber, as soon as the distinctive snap-hiss could be heard, Anakin acted. His own 'saber was ignited, he did a back flip to face her, and their duel began. Asajj allowed herself to slide into the Force, meeting each thrust and strike with the Soresu she learned from Obi-Wan. It was a form that was perfect for her gentle husband. Mace often said that Obi-Wan was the stone in the harbor that the water crashed upon. She hadn't understood what he meant until she went to Naboo for her first (and thankfully, last) undercover assignment.
But right now, he was not that rock. He was frightened and confused, with no hint of the strength that they had all known and come to rely upon. There was no way he could possibly be anything else. Now they had to be strong for him, and it was already taking its toll. In the long months they searched for him, they had that belief, that certainty, that he was still alive. They could cling to that, and to each other. Now, he was home and he was safe (mostly), but now he needed them to be strong. Anakin in particular felt adrift. He had seen Obi-Wan injured before, of course. They all had. The injuries he sustained on Naboo during the fight with the Zabrak came immediately to mind.
But he had never seen him so. . .well, like this. None of them had. But for the first time since leaving his mother at the age of nine, Anakin was seeing just how fragile his master could truly be. The next few weeks and months would be difficult for all of them, but Anakin would find it especially hard. Not just as a former slave, but his mother's brush with death a few years earlier hit him hard. After everything they went through as slaves, to have her nearly die at the hands of Tusken raiders as a free woman. . .and that wasn't even the worst part of it. At first, it was as if something had broken in her, and that quiet, loving, steady presence that helped to keep Anakin stable flickered and nearly went out.
Asajj, who lost her own mother at a young age, had done her best for her little brother. They all had. . .Cliegg, Owen and Owen's sweet (then) fiancée Beru. But until Shmi Skywalker Lars began to regain her spirit as well as her health, the shadows didn't leave Anakin's eyes. (The fact that the entire excursion eventually caused a terrible argument between Anakin and Obi-Wan didn't help, either) Remembering Anakin's despondency during the weeks that followed, she feared history would repeat itself. Like Shmi, Obi-Wan was one of the pillars of Anakin's existence. He had returned to them, and physically, he was in better condition than Shmi. But he didn't recognize this reality, and that was the part that frightened them all.
Asajj shut off the corner of her mind that wasn't focused on their match and returned her full attention to Anakin. He was tiring, and moisture ran down his face. Whether it was sweat or tears, it was hard to say. But he wouldn't last much longer. . . which was why she had chosen Soresu. It tended to wear down one's opponents. Anakin's blows became wilder and more erratic, his lips pulled back from his teeth in a feral grimace. Asajj 's instinct about her brother's performance in their match was borne out a few minutes later, when Anakin's lightsaber winked out and he fell to his knees, gasping. Asajj turned off her own saber, clipped it back to her belt, and then knelt in front of Anakin. He gave a low sob and threw himself into her arms.
She held him tightly, knowing that she would obtain her own release in tears later. And Asajj would need to cry, after seeing her husband. But right now, Anakin needed her to be strong. She tightened her arms around him yet again, running her hand over the bristles of his padawan haircut to stroke the back of his neck. She was relieved her Master was taking care of the twins. When this was all over, she was taking Luke, Leia, Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Master Dooku on a long, long vacation. Her poor Obi-Wan had earned it, and so had the rest of their family!
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do to help him, Asajj," Anakin choked out, "I don't know what he needs me to do! He looks at me, and I see relief and happiness that I'm here, and I'm okay, but I see fear, too. He's afraid, Asajj, and it hurts to see him looking at me with so much fear in his eyes. He's afraid for me, and he's afraid of me. He's afraid that I'm going to fall again, and I don't know how to reassure him! That's. . .I'm afraid, too, Asajj. I'm afraid of what I'll do to Sidious when we find him! He hurt Master, he hurt him so badly, and I don't know what to do to make him better!"
The blonde Knight closed her eyes, holding Anakin tightly as his words ended on a wail. She really didn't know what else to do right now. There were no easy answers here. As Asajj knew all too well, what Obi-Wan needed right now, more than anything, was something Anakin found hardest to give: patience. After hearing about what Obi-Wan had seen (no doubt why Mace had told them in the first place), it would take him time to realize that this reality was. . . well, for lack of a better word, 'real.' She said softly, soothing him as best she could with her hands and her words, "I know how hard being patient is for you, Anakin. . .but that's the best thing you can do for him right now. He needs you to give him time to adjust. And he needs you to love him. It may take time for him to remember, really remember, but in the meantime, we give him new memories, to replace the ones Sidious created for him."
"Of course I love him! Even when I was being a rate-A Sithling brat, I've always loved him!" Anakin cried out, his arms tightening around Asajj almost convulsively. She knew that. And so did Obi-Wan. But what was becoming more and more clear was, that wasn't the point. Anakin hadn't yet realized it (although he was starting to see the outlines, it seemed), but it was entirely possible they would need to completely rebuild their relationships with Obi-Wan. . .from the ground up. All of them, except Luke and Leia. But even that knowledge had its silver lining, even that possibility held hope, and this was something she shared with Anakin.
"He may never remember us, Anakin. . .the real us. The slightly bratty apprentice who adores him, the wife who is probably only on the Light Side because of him, the Master whom he saved. But we can give him new memories, like I said. Even if he doesn't remember the good things, he also won't remember the bad things. . .you screaming him at him that you hated him after we came back from Tatooine; the times I punched and kicked and attacked him because of the emptiness I felt inside. I don't know about you, but I hope he never remembers those things," Asajj answered.
"I. . .I hadn't thought about that," Anakin whispered, "I don't want him to remember how stupid I was. I wasn't even really mad at him, I was mad at myself. I was mad at myself, and I hurt him because of that." Asajj released a silent sigh of relief. She could feel the Force around him calming. His signature in the Force wasn't nearly as stormy as it had been. She gave him a little hug, and Anakin sighed, "I'm sorry. I've been a selfish jerk, only thinking about how scared I am. I hadn't thought about how you were feeling."
Asajj smiled, relaxing ever so slightly, and replied, "I'm scared and angry, and worried. But I keep telling myself that we have him back. We have Obi-Wan back, and we're going to take care of him. You said it yourself, on Rattarak, Niki. He always takes care of us, and now, it's our turn to take care of him. Even Luke and Leia will take care of him, in their own baby way. He's going to come back to us, sooner or later. Maybe he'll never totally be the Obi-Wan we remember from before, but he will come back to us, and we will put our family back together again. You know I don't make many promises. . .but that, I can promise you. Our family will be whole once more."
Anakin gave her a weak smile, and Asajj added with an almost evil grin, "And when Obi-Wan becomes more like his old self, then we can both chide you for having the bad taste in the other timeline to fall in love with the likes of Padme Amidala. I mean, c'mon, Anakin, I know you're young, but that's pathetic!" That surprised a true laugh out of him, and Asajj hugged him again.
"Hey, I was nine years old! How old were you when you fell in love with Master?" Anakin protested as Asajj rose to her feet and helped him up. Asajj just smirked, quietly pleased that he was reaching the point where he could return her teasing. And now, it was time for them to return to Obi-Wan. He would have need of them soon, she sensed.
SWSWSWSWSWSWSWSW
Obi-Wan's return had a restorative effect on the Jedi currently at the Temple, something Yan Dooku noticed as he strode through the corridors with Luke in one arm and Leia in the other. Either that or they were simply relieved that Anakin was no longer storming around, and that Asajj was actually smiling again. Either way, the younglings he encountered were practically skipping with delight, the initiates seemed just as thrilled, and more than a few padawans were beaming. Yan could only smile back in relief and joy. Not just because Obi-Wan was home, but also because none of the Jedi whom he encountered trying to stop him for a conversation.
Then again, they probably deduced that he was on his way to see Obi-Wan, especially with the twins in his arms. As he strode down the halls, he reminded himself of everything he had to say or not say. His boy would be quite confused, and he had to remember that. He had to be patient with him. The trouble was, being patient with Obi-Wan was never an issue. Being patient with himself was another story. As he reached the Healer's Wing, he was somewhat surprised to see neither Asajj nor Anakin beside Obi-Wan's bed. Instead, Mace Windu sat there, reading a holopad and glancing at Obi-Wan every few minutes. The young man himself was resting quietly. Leia breathed, "Daddy? Daddy wake up?" Mace looked up and smiled, holding his hands out to the little girl. Yan swung the child over to his friend, making Leia squeal with laughter.
Obi-Wan groaned a little, shifting on the bed, and Yan turned in time to see the boy's eyes open. That was all it took for him to forget all of his resolutions. He beamed, murmuring, "It's good to see you awake, child." Obi-Wan blinked, but smiled faintly. Yan deposited Luke in Mace's free arm, and then knelt beside his padawan, gently stroking his hair back from his forehead. Obi-Wan stared up at him in surprise and Yan mentally kicked himself. Foolish old man! He was relieved to find there was only surprise in the younger man's expression, not alarm.
The older Jedi turned to look at the Council member. Mace very carefully avoided his eyes, and Yan sighed. As Obi-Wan's former Master, this was his responsibility. He said as much to Yoda, and that was as true now as when they came back from Rattarak. Yan Dooku had never shirked his responsibility to any of his padawans, and he wouldn't start now. He just hoped Mace didn't say something to Yoda. That reminded him. . .he had to find out where his former mentor was. Obi-Wan was dear to him as well. Unless Yoda was trying to give Obi-Wan's immediate family the room he believed they needed.
Well, they would worry about that later. He turned back to the young man and smiled at him reassuringly, making sure to pull the blanket up around his shoulders. The small gesture gave him time to think, to work out what he meant to say. Yan finally said quietly, "I can't begin to imagine how confused you must be, child. Mace told us a little of what you saw, in that other timeline. Myself, Anakin, and Asajj, all Sith or Sith hopefuls. Becoming a Knight in such a heart-wrenching way. There is so much you need to know. But the first, and most important thing you need to remember, padawan, is to be patient with yourself." Obi-Wan's eyes widened and he mouthed, 'padawan?' Too late, Yan remembered that in Mace's Visions the other timeline, he was Obi-Wan's grandmaster, instead of his Master.
But it was too late to take the words back, and he really didn't want to. Great stars, this was becoming complicated! Yan forged ahead, telling the young man, "Yes, child. . .you're my padawan. I took you as my padawan learner a few months after your twelfth birthday. It was, quite possibly, the wisest thing I've ever done. And even after you were knighted, twelve years ago, you have remained my beloved apprentice and dearest friend." Obi-Wan started to speak, swallowed hard, and tried again. Yan waited patiently, knowing how it was sometimes difficult for Obi-Wan to ask such questions. It took several attempts before he could push the words out.
At last, he whispered, "Just after my twelfth birthday? I. . .I never went to Bandomeer, to the AgriCorps?" To the AgriCorps? That was disbanded more than thirty years earlier! Why in the galaxy. . . And Yan realized he made the same mistake, again. They would have to be careful about that. The boy wasn't thinking in terms of the true reality, but what he had seen in Mace's dreams. Of course he was, that was the 'reality' he thought he knew. They were making the assumption that Obi-Wan had seen Mace's dreams, but given the Councilor's statements about Obi-Wan's reactions when he first woke up, Yan thought it was a reasonable assumption to make.
That was why he said now, "No, padawan, you never went to the AgriCorps. That Corps. . .indeed, all of the Corps except the Exploration Corps. . .was disbanded a little over thirty years ago, when it was realized that rejected initiates were entirely too vulnerable to the Dark Side. And I would have never allowed that to be your fate. I knew, from the moment I saw you, Obi-Wan, that you were meant to be my padawan." He thought, for a short time, that a man in his fifties had no business taking a new padawan and that the boy would be better served with a younger master. But the will of the Force was clear. Besides, Yoda was centuries old, and he had many students.
"Have. . .has there ever been a time when I failed you?" Obi-Wan asked softly. Failed him? Where in the galaxy was he getting these ideas? Yan had thought earlier that he knew just what he, Asajj, and Anakin were up against. It was only now that he was starting to realize the truth. . .he actually had no idea. They had no idea. But he had to comprehend it quickly. His padawan's sanity might well depend on it. Even so, even with that understanding, Yan struggled to speak. At last, he picked up Obi-Wan's hand from where it rested on the sheets, holding it tightly. When he finally had a handle on his emotions, Yan looked at his padawan, staring firmly into his eyes.
He said softly, "There has never been a time, Obi-Wan Kenobi, when you've failed me. There has never been a time when you've disappointed me. You haven't been the perfect padawan, and there might have been times when your performance wasn't quite what I was expecting, but I have never expected perfection. You've always done your best, and whether I praised your successes or corrected your mistakes, you've always striven to be better. And I couldn't ask for a better padawan." Obi-Wan's eyes widened, and he blinked rapidly, as if to blink back tears. Yan pressed his free hand to his former student's cheek and whispered, "You have only ever been a blessing to me."
"What. . .what about when I left the Jedi on Melida/Daan?" Obi-Wan stammered. Only Yan's lifetime of training as a Jedi kept him from gaping at his former padawan in absolute shock. Left the Jedi? Melida/Daan? What did the boy mean? His hand tightened around Obi-Wan's, almost reflexively. Every time he thought he had a handle on what Obi-Wan thought he remembered, the boy threw him for another loop. In his mind's eye, he could see a young boy, staring up at him with an almost desperate expression. . .could hear that boy tell him urgently, They need help, Master! Yan shook himself and refocused his attention on the young man in front of him, that little boy now all grown up. Realigning Obi-Wan's memories could very well take years. For now, he would remember the advice of his first padawan, and focus on this moment.
He replied, "You never left the Jedi on Melida/Daan, Obi-Wan. I do not know how it played out in that other reality you saw, but you did not want to leave the Young to fight alone, and I was not about to leave you alone. Master Tahl was injured, so Qui-Gon took her and Bant to the ship. You and I remained behind, and continued our work. Tragically, neither of us could save Cerasi, but that was not your fault, child. It was never your fault. The ship returned shortly after Cerasi's death, at Tahl's insistence. We did have some trouble when we returned to the Temple, because some people received the mistaken impression that you left the Jedi, but Tahl and I quickly put things to rights." Something from which he derived a great deal of pleasure. . .and so did Tahl.
A glance at his former padawan told him that the poor boy was quite close to going into shock. Obi-Wan tried repeatedly to say something, and failed miserably. Yan finally placed a gentle finger against his lips, saying softly, "You don't need to say anything. There is so much you need to know. I can't pretend to know what you saw, but here are the most important things. You have a Master who loves you without reservation; a padawan who would no more turn to the Dark Side than he would fall in love with the child-Senator; so very many friends who are so glad you're home; and. . .and you're half the reason Asajj Ventress is a respected Knight. She most likely will never be a Master, but I doubt that matters a great deal to her."
"Yan. . .you should tell him the rest of it. He needs to hear it from you," Mace said quietly. Did he? Mace repeated, "He needs to know the rest of the story about Asajj. It won't occur to her not to tell him." Yan closed his eyes, realizing his friend was right. Asajj would want to spend time with her husband, just as Luke and Leia wanted to spend time with their father. They had done without him for six months, they had missed him terribly, and. . . Yan's hands tightened around Obi-Wan's.
"Gr. . .Master. . .those children? Who are they?" Obi-Wan asked hesitantly, looking at the twin toddlers in Mace's arms. Yan found he was almost grateful for his former padawan's question, as it distracted him from the sticky point of explaining Obi-Wan's relationship with Asajj. It might also provide a lead-in to that particular conversation. Surprisingly enough, the twins hadn't made a noise yet. They just stared at Obi-Wan with big, anxious eyes. Yan couldn't speak. Obi-Wan added, "And Mace. . .you said something about Asajj. . .what about her? What do I need to know about her? Please. . . you can't say something like that and then expect me to ignore it!" The confusion and pain in his padawan's voice would have broken Yan's heart, if he hadn't already known about Mace's dreams.
He squeezed Obi-Wan's hand and said quietly, "You probably realized, child, that the no-attachment rule is void. It was. . .removed, more than thirty years ago, after a badly-injured Master recovered from nearly-fatal wounds. This Master was intimate with a woman, and together, they created a child. That child was placed in the crèche, where he remained for the next six months. Then the Master, the father, was nearly killed on what should have been a routine mission. He would have died, if a brave little padawan hadn't gone to the crèche and retrieved the infant boy, then carried him to the Healer's Wing, placing him beside his father."
"That day," Mace said softly, "the rules began to. . .change. The Master's love for, his attachment to, his son saved his life. The Council began to rethink a great many things. By the time Asajj and Anakin came to us, the Order had changed greatly. What your Master is trying to tell you is, these children I have in my lap. . .are your son and daughter." Yan shot his friend a grateful look, knowing fully well that he would pay for it later. That was fine. He would be more than happy to pay.
"My. . .my children? How old are they, what are their names. . .who is their mother?" Obi-Wan asked, the words rushing out. Mace rose to his feet, holding the twins in front of him, and moved closer to the bed. Yan watched his padawan's face, rather than his friend's progression. Mace eased Luke onto the bed first, and the little boy immediately crawled to his father, throwing both arms around his neck. Obi-Wan stabilized him with a careful, protective arm around his small body, breathing, "Luke?"
The toddler pulled back from hugging his father and pressed both hands to his cheeks, exclaiming, "Daddy!" Though Obi-Wan was clearly in shock, Yan noted that as he always did when Luke pressed his tiny hands to his father's cheeks, Obi-Wan turned his head ever so slightly to kiss the palm of his son's hand. He might not have a conscious memory of his children. . .but there was a part of him which did remember. With a gentle smile, Mace settled Leia on the bed and the little girl followed her brother's lead, crawling up her father's legs to cuddle against his chest.
"And Leia? They. . .they're mine?" their father breathed. He brushed a gentle kiss to the top of Leia's head, his arms tightening around them both. Yan simply watched, mentally committing this picture to his memory. He learned the hard way, half-believing for months that his padawan was lost to him, just how quickly a person could lose what mattered most to him or her. If he was to lose Obi-Wan again (Force forbid), he wanted to have this memory. But Yan would make sure they wouldn't lose Obi-Wan ever again.
"They are both yours, and they adore you. It was because of Luke, and a strange transmission, that we found you at all. Luke's dreams about Rattarak pointed us in the right direct, but it was the transmission that convinced the Council that Luke's dreams were far more important than a little boy's wish to have his father home. I have no idea who sent that transmission, but I owe them a debt of gratitude I can never repay. Asajj and Anakin went to Rattarak and rescued you. That was a few days ago. You have spent the time since then sleeping for the most part. I know you woke up earlier, when Anakin was in here. I think he has slept very little for the last few weeks, ever since Luke's dreams started. The hint of a possibility that we might find you. . .the last six months have been terrible for the poor boy. For all of us," Yan replied.
"Anakin never married Padme. . .Luke and Leia are my children. . .you are my Master, rather than my grandmaster. Is. . .is Master Qui-Gon dead? Anakin was found on Tatooine, yes?" Obi-Wan asked. Yan nodded, noting that he hadn't asked about Luke and Leia's mother again yet. That was good. His poor child had received so many shocks already, and he had only truly awakened today. For some reason, he had the feeling that the revelation about Asajj might be a little too much for him.
"Yes, you and Qui-Gon found Anakin on Tatooine, a little over ten years ago. I know Qui-Gon wanted to train Anakin, just as he wanted to train you, but a bond immediately formed between you boys. Qui-Gon died on Naboo during a duel with a Sith, whom you eventually killed. You, however, were seriously injured during the duel, and for several days, we were afraid we would lose you. Asajj was undercover as one of Queen Amidala's handmaidens and she contacted me whenever she could," Yan explained. Obi-Wan's eyebrows shot up into his hairline, and Yan continued with a smile, "She was quite pleased to wash that dark dye out of her hair."
"What. . .color is her hair naturally?" Obi-Wan asked slowly, kissing the top of Luke's head. He was frowning in confusion, as if he was trying to work something out. By now, Yan knew every expression. . .he knew when Obi-Wan was confused because something made no sense, and he knew when he was confused because of conflicting information. This was the latter sort of expression. The trouble was, Yan had no idea what was causing the conflict of information. And Mace, damn him, was absolutely silent.
"Blonde. Pale blonde, which she usually wears in multiple braids. She decided she liked the padawan braid so much, she would wear her hair in multiple braids," Yan explained, surprising a laugh out of the young man. The elder Jedi rejoiced in the sound. It was so good to hear it again. After a moment, he continued, "She was a prickly little thing, in the beginning. She still can be, but that has been softened by love. Asajj can still be venomous, but it is usually protecting someone she loves. On occasion, she is venomous toward her loved ones, but usually, that comes from fear."
Obi-Wan nodded, his eyes distant as he kissed the top of his daughter's head, before nuzzling his son as well. He was silent for several moments, and Yan was gratified to see that the children had fallen asleep, content in their father's arms. At last, Obi-Wan looked up at him and whispered, "Gran. . . Master, what happened to me?" If Yan thought things were complicated earlier, he had been wrong. How exactly did he explain to his padawan what happened? How did he explain just how badly he had failed him, in not realizing that he was heading for a trap? Of course, knowing Obi-Wan, not only would he forgive him, but he wouldn't even understand why Yan was apologizing to him.
So, he took the most sensible path (reminding himself not to editorialize. Obi-Wan wouldn't remember any of his quirks). He covered Obi-Wan's hand with his own, saying softly, "A little over six months ago, you left Coruscant on protection detail. At the request of her husband, you were escorting Senator Amidala to Geonosis, in the hopes she could talk the Separatists out of leaving the Republic. You and her husband, the governor of Telos, both made repeated attempts to talk her out of it, reminding that Nute Gunray had attempted to kill her repeatedly over the last eleven years, since the invasion of Naboo. However, being the willful young lady she is, she insisted that she could prevent the war. In an attempt to keep her safe, the governor asked you to look after her. It was, of course, a trap. Your ship never reached Geonosis. . .instead, you were attacked during your final approach and boarded. The Force gave you enough warning to push the senator into an escape pod, but not enough time for you to escape safely. As we learned later, you were captured immediately thereafter."
Obi-Wan's eyes never left his face, and Yan continued, "Once we retrieved the escape pod, Anakin and I immediately set out to find you. According to the Geonosian authorities, after the attempted abduction of Senator Amidala failed, your ship crashed, leaving no survivors. Your bond with Anakin was muted; that was how we knew you weren't really dead. That, and there were no human remains found in the ship. You were alive, it was just a matter of finding you."
His former padawan shook his head, murmuring, "I don't remember anything of that. You said that Senator Amidala was married to the governor of Telos?" Yan nodded and waited patiently as the young man puzzled that one out. At last, Obi-Wan said softly, "In my memories. . .in what you and Mace tell me were nightmares. . .she was married to Anakin. They had two children together, Luke and Leia, but they had to be raised separately to protect them after Anakin fell."
"Padme Amidala married Xanatos about eight years ago. Would you like me to tell you how that came about?" Yan asked. Obi-Wan nodded slowly, and the elder Jedi explained, "After her planet was liberated, questions were raised about why Naboo could not defend itself. Yes, they had their civil air defense corps, but that did them little good. The idea was raised that another planet would enter into a treaty with the people of Naboo. Xanatos of Telos offered to marry Queen Amidala, in exchange for. . .well, that part matters little. Suffice to say, they were married about six months later and after her second term as queen was up, she left Naboo to represent Telos as a Senator."
Not surprisingly, Obi-Wan's first question was, "Is that legal?" Yan bit his lip to keep from smiling. . .there was the boy he raised! The youngster blushed and ducked his head, as he often did as a teenager when he was embarrassed.
"Quite," he assured his former padawan, "she now represents the people of Telos within the Senate, and assists her home planet at every opportunity." Yan sighed a little, adding, "I am quite proud of Xanatos. He has grown into a fine man, an excellent governor, and a very shrewd businessman. When we discovered you were on Rattarak, Xan was the first to offer the use of his ship despite the animosity between Asajj and his wife. And for all that he loves his wife, Xan wanted you found. . .and he wanted you safe."
"Xanatos was very different in my memory," Obi-Wan murmured. Yes, of that, Yan had no doubt. However, he said nothing, and after a moment, his former padawan continued, "I would think that the mission to Telos turned out quite differently, and yet the same. Xanatos is obviously no longer a Jedi, as he's the governor of Telos and married. Do they have any children. . .Xanatos and Padme?" Yan shook his head. The Senator was still quite young, and while he had no doubt that she was a good step-mother to young Granta, he was also certain that she was not yet ready to be a mother.
Still, he mentioned neither of these things to Obi-Wan, choosing instead to answer, "I have no idea how Telos played out in your memory. I can tell you, however, that the Council opposed the idea of Xanatos going to Telos, especially such a short time after his previous mission. He was still recovering from how badly things turned out. Qui-Gon, however, insisted that the boy was quite strong enough to deal with whatever Crion could throw at him. Since he raised Xan for so many years, the Council acceded to his wishes, and they journeyed to Telos."
From Obi-Wan's expression, he could tell this was the last thing the young man was expecting to hear. However, the boy was silent and Yan went on, "Things went quickly from bad to worse. Crion provoked a fight with Qui-Gon during a state dinner, and matters escalated. No one fully knows what happened after that, but by the end of the night, Crion was dead at Qui-Gon's hand. . .in fact, he died in his son's arms. And Qui-Gon left for Coruscant as Xanatos tried to save his father's life. Xanatos returned to us long enough to leave the Jedi Order and give his lightsaber to the Council, and then he returned to Telos. The Council was so enraged with Qui-Gon, they placed him on probation. . .not allowing him to take another padawan until he proved he was worthy."
Mace observed quietly, "We wanted to be sure he would put the well-being, both physical and mental, of his padawan before his own pride. There were already those of us in the Order, and on the Council, who were breaking the no-attachment rule. The removal of those rules thirty-odd years ago gave them the freedom to come into the light. It did one other thing. . .it allowed us to listen to the Force more closely. It warned us that Qui-Gon's pride would cause trouble for his padawans if it remained unchecked, and none of us were willing to endanger a child in such a way."
"My pride was what caused Anakin to fall in my memories," Obi-Wan said softly, "I was so sure that I could train him as well as Yoda. Because of that, because I failed to see how dangerous the chancellor was. . .he fell. I failed him. I failed the entire Order, and then I failed his family again, because his grandson fell and nearly destroyed all light in the galaxy." Now that, Yan seriously doubted. He wasn't the only one. A glance over his shoulder told him that Mace was staring at Obi-Wan with a flat-out disbelieving stare. Recognizing that expression on the Councilor's face, Yan simply grinned. This would likely be enjoyable to watch.
"I have never known you to lie, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and you are telling an untruth right now. Fact, Yoda never wanted Anakin trained in that reality, so that argument holds no weight. Fact, it was not your 'overweening pride or hubris' that led to Anakin's fall, there was far more to it. To say otherwise is to remove responsibility from others, and when you do that, they cannot learn from their mistakes. Were mistakes made on your part? Of course. But you are only a man, Obi-Wan Kenobi. . .an excellent Jedi, a fine Master, an exemplary padawan, a loving husband and father, but for all that, only a man. Do not take responsibility from the shoulders of others," Mace told the young Knight sternly.
Much to Yan's amusement, Obi-Wan's mouth was opening and closing in shock. Mace continued in a more gentle tone, "I have seen some of what you saw, Obi-Wan. Anakin's fall was not your fault. You weren't even on the planet when it happened, after all. Anakin's mirror self told you not to blame yourself when you met again in the Force, remember? He told you again when he watched his grandson follow his dark path. I am telling you now. And I have no doubt that your Anakin, our Anakin, will tell you the exact same thing. He loves you very much."
"And I him," Obi-Wan whispered, lowering his eyes. Yan squeezed his padawan's hand gently, and then reached up to brush the auburn hair away from his forehead. As had been the case since he awakened, the gesture surprised Obi-Wan, but he reined in his reaction and murmured an apology. At last, he said, "Forgive me, Masters, I have so much to consider. . .so much to which I must accustom myself. Everything I thought I knew about my life, about my past, is untrue. . .and yet, it still feels true to me."
"There is nothing to forgive, Obi-Wan," Mace replied, his voice growing even more gentle, "that, to you, is real, and you half-fear waking up to find that this reality is the dream." Obi-Wan's head reared up and he stared at Mace in utter shock. Mace merely smiled at him and added, "Did you really think we would not understand? Obi-Wan, I saw much of what happened in that other reality, the one you still believe in your soul to be the real one. To go from there to here, which, while not perfect, is still far more appealing. . .of course you fear waking from this dream. Again. You are but a human being, a fallible man. Anyone would feel that way, Jedi or not."
"Th. . .thank you. I have so much to consider, so much. . .what of the others? Yoda, Kit Fisto. . .and the others? Not just the Jedi, but others. What of Bail and Breha Organa? Alderaan is safe? I remember Bail Organa telling me that his wife Breha could never carry a child to term. . .Bail offered to take Leia for that reason. They spoke often of adopting a little girl, and they loved Leia fiercely," Obi-Wan replied. Mace and Yan shared a smile. Yet another thing that was different, better, in this world. However, before either man could speak, they were joined by another Master. . .the smallest, and greatest, of them all. While he would have never said it aloud, Yan was relieved to see this particular Master.
"Ahh, awakened, he has. Good, it is, to see your eyes open, young one," Grandmaster Yoda said, hobbling into the room. Yan watched as Obi-Wan's eyes lit up at the side of the ancient Master. He smiled, actually looking happy, and Yan squashed the momentary jealousy. Yoda came to Obi-Wan's bedside, patting his thigh with one small, clawed hand, adding, "Been worried for you, we have. Very relieved, we all are, to have you safe, young Obi-Wan. Missed greatly, you have been."
"I've missed you as well, Master Yoda," Obi-Wan whispered hoarsely. Yoda's huge green eyes observed all the changes Yan noticed in his child. . .the set of his shoulders, the pain in his eyes, the exhaustion that remained. Though the Jedi Order had changed over the last thirty-plus years, in some ways, Master Yoda remained the same individual Yan remembered from his own childhood. The changes had been hard for him, but he adapted as best he could.
"Hmm, seen things, you have. Things that could have been, things that might still be. Scarred you, these things have," Yoda told the young man. Yan barely held back from rolling his eyes. If they were going to listen to Yoda, first he had to stop telling things they already knew! Yoda humphed, no doubt knowing what his former protégé was thinking, but told his former student in a gentle voice, "Remember this, you must, young one. Alone you were, in your false memories. No one to guide you guide the Chosen One. Alone here, you are not. Love you, we all do. Abandon you, we will not. Abandon you, we cannot."
"You never abandoned me. . .we had to go into exile, it was the only way to make sure any Jedi survived!" Obi-Wan immediately protested. Yoda, however, shook his head sadly, never losing eye contact with the youngest Jedi present. Obi-Wan asked softly, "Was. . .did you mean something else?" Yan wished he could hold his poor, confused padawan, but right now, that simply wasn't a good idea. In Obi-Wan's mind and soul, Yan himself was still his grandmaster, the man who had done so much to hurt Obi-Wan. Mentally, he knew the truth, but it would take time before Obi-Wan could lean on him without thinking about it, as he did before this nightmare began. Perhaps a long time.
"What Yoda means, Obi-Wan, is that in the other reality, you never received the support you needed. When you asked for help, no one gave you that help. . .and no one listened to your warnings. Remember? You knew that High Council shouldn't ask Anakin to spy on Palpatine," Mace replied quietly. Obi-Wan closed his eyes tightly and began to rub his fingers back and forth across his forehead, a familiar gesture. His padawan was being pushed to his limits. . .too much was new, too much was strange, and his body was rebelling. The headaches were the first symptoms. As Obi-Wan struggled to assimilate this new information, he would get sicker. . .unless Yan could alleviate that now.
"Master Yoda, Mace. . .might I have a few moments alone with my padawan and his children?" Yan requested. Much to his relief, the two Councilors immediately agreed and left the room, though not before Yoda patted Obi-Wan's thigh reassuringly and Mace squeezed his shoulder. With the two Councilors gone, Yan turned his attention to his padawan. Ever mindful of the two small children, he slipped his hand around the back of Obi-Wan's neck, sensing the boy was on the verge of completely shattering. Given the circumstances, not even the Dark Woman could have blamed him, either.
On the other hand. . .best not to tempt fate. Pitching his voice low, Yan soothed, "All will be well, padawan. Shh. Release it to the Force, my little one. Release your fear and your confusion. Shh. I'm here, padawan." It was a measure of just how rattled Obi-Wan was that the stubborn, independent young man did not resist him. With that light touch, memories flashed through his mind. Yan didn't know if they were true memories, or more memories falsely placed by Sidious. He had a sick feeling, however, that they were true. . .his padawan a captive, helpless and unable to defend himself. Between the Force-collar around his neck and the strong arms holding him from behind. Yan could feel the fear. . .and the pain as a sneering human male punched him repeatedly. The elder Master murmured, "I have you, child, he can never hurt you again."
"Forgive me, Master. . .I should have better control than this," Obi-Wan whispered, and Yan closed his eyes, feeling tears prickling at the backs of his eyes. He maintained his gentle grip on his former padawan, careful to avoid crushing the two toddlers asleep on their father's chest. So far as he was concerned, there was nothing wrong with the boy's control, not when he was able to keep his emotions in check to the point that he can avoid waking the twins. Even now, in his pain and confusion, his former padawan maintained his shields. Then again, his padawan always had frighteningly strong shields. After a moment, Yan opened his eyes once more and stared hard at the youngster.
"There is nothing to forgive, child. You have been through the worst kind of torture imaginable. . .mental torture. You awaken in a world both familiar and strange. No, if anyone should beg forgiveness, I should. I should have protected you better. What is the last thing you remember. . .of anything? The dreams or of this life?" Yan whispered. Obi-Wan released a breath, as if trying to release his anguish at the same time. He wouldn't break down. . .not yet, not his Obi-Wan. But sooner or later, the real and unreal would collide.
"In the. . .dream world. Leia's son Jacen had fallen to the Dark Side, just as Anakin did. He thought he was turning for the right reasons, but before it was all over. . ." Obi-Wan began. He shuddered, and Yan fought the inclination to speak. Obi-Wan needed him to listen right now. . .not to react. After a moment, the young man went on, "It nearly destroyed Anakin. He had done so much to hurt both Luke and Leia. . .cutting off Luke's hand, torturing Leia, holding her and forcing her to watch while Grand Moff Tarkin blasted Alderaan into so much space dust. Seeing his children in such pain again, and being unable to help them. . .oh stars, I couldn't help him!"
The grief in that simple sentence spoke volumes to the silver-haired Jedi Master. He kept his tongue still, however, and his ears active. After a moment, Obi-Wan continued hoarsely, "And through those flashes, of seeing the Purge through my own eyes, through Anakin's eyes, through the eyes of others, I see something else. Someone else, a young woman with long blonde hair. Sometimes I see her with many slim braids and sometimes I see her with loose hair. But she's beautiful, and she's smiling at someone. Someone she loves. It nearly breaks my hair, to see the love in that smile."
"That is Asajj you're seeing, padawan. That beautiful blonde girl is Asajj. And the person who is gifted with those smiles? Is you," Yan told his former padawan. Obi-Wan's mouth dropped open. Almost in spite of himself, his eyes dropped to the two children even now nestled against his chest. He looked back up at Yan, the desire to ask the question warring with the fear. Fear that he would be wrong, or fear of something else? He didn't know. And so, Yan Dooku answered the question that his padawan wanted to ask, was terrified to ask. He said softly, "Yes. Asajj is the mother of those beautiful children."
"But. . .how? If Asajj has blonde hair, where did Leia get her dark hair?" Obi-Wan choked out. Yan curbed his desire to tease Obi-Wan with a repeat of 'The Talk,' and instead focused on what Obi-Wan was actually asking. It was a fair question. Obi-Wan had auburn hair (the shade varied according to its length) and Asajj's hair was pale blonde, so how did they end up with a dark-haired child? Perhaps that was how Sidious was able to convince Obi-Wan that Leia was in fact, the child of Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala Naberrie?
"Our daughter inherited her hair color from her grandfather," a familiar voice said from the doorway. Obi-Wan's head turned so quickly, it made Yan's neck ache just to watch. His most recent padawan had a habit of showing up at the most unlikely of times. Put her together with Obi-Wan and Anakin, and you had a truly terrifying trinity. However, neither Asajj nor Anakin (who was peering over her shoulder, eyes red with recent tears) looked terrifying at the moment. More like terrified.
With a warm smile, Yan extended his free hand to the two young Jedi, saying, "Your timing couldn't be better. I'd like to introduce the two of you to someone very dear. Anakin, Asajj, I'd like you both to meet Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan, this is your padawan learner, Anakin Skywalker, and your wife, the mother of these precious twins, Asajj Ventress-Kenobi." Asajj may have had excellent timing. But as he saw Obi-Wan's eyes round in shock, and his mouth form the word, 'wife,' Yan smugly reflected that he still had the last word.