*Okay as always I own nothing of Criminal Minds or Rizzoli & Isles just enjoying using the characters.

d

JJ was laying there with Emily on her chest reflecting back over the last year of their lives. She knew that most everyone had talked to Emily in the two weeks leading up to the wedding about what had happened on the plane ride back from Memphis except her. Emily had even prodded a bit with some questions of "how are you feeling and are we okay?" She just could seem to open that box in herself to let the woman sleeping on her chest see the raw emotions that were still there even though she knew that Emily felt them. Maybe it was because she herself had neatly hidden them away thinking they could explode and she would have nothing again.

It had been moths since she had held Emily in her arms like she was doing and yet she could fuss because if she was marrying anyone else but Maura she wouldn't even be given this moment. She kissed the black hair in front of her and felt a hand tighten on her stomach then move under her shirt as she started smiling knowing that her angel was well into her pleasant dreams now.

She loved these private moments with Emily. She sighed a deep sigh wondering if she could've ever been bold enough to have married Emily publicly like Maura.

"That was a deep sigh love." Emily rasped out, "What has you so deep in thought at 2 am?" She asked looking over at the clock.

"Oh... nothing. I'm just playing the "what if game."

Emily lifted up and came to the pillow so she could see the woman's facial expressions. "Yeah..."

"Yeah... go back to sleep. You have a big day tomorrow."

"Sleep can wait... what is it?" She got no answer, "Jennifer..." was whispered so softly in hear ear as a warm arm came around her stomach. That for some reason opened the dam and all the tears that she had been holding back for a year seemed to pour from her body. "Shhh... I got you my beautiful blackbird." That started the deep sobs of release. "I got you." She said again and started kissing the woman's head.

"Em..." was all JJ could get out from her vocal chords at the moment.

"I'm here love... I will always be here."

"Why... I wasn't for you?" Was finally let loose from the imprisoned box it was laying dormant in.

"What?"

"I wasn't there for you when you came back from Paris. I didn't speak to you after you left for London..."

"Hey... hey... where is this all coming from? Emily asked and wiped some of the tears off of JJ's cheeks.

"I was wondering if things had been different if I could have had a public wedding for us. But I know given my state of mind then the answer would have been no."

"But what about now?" Emily asked throwing a question out that she wasn't expecting.

"You are marrying Maura tomorrow..."

"Yes... I am and you are deflecting answering me." JJ seemed to have lost her voice, "Are you not wanting me to marry Maura?" Emily asked wanting to see what JJ was thinking.

"No!" Was quickly answered. "I am thrilled you to are getting married. I love you both so much."

"Good... because we love you too. Now answer me." She said bringing the focus back on to the original question.

"In this last year my love for you has expanded so much that I can't keep it inside anymore. I really don't want too... you have always been my angel and now I get to keep you in my life because of the woman you are marrying. I am so happy for you... I know I had issues of expressing my love before because of Henry but that's not even an issue anymore." She rambled off and looked up at the woman, "I want the whole world to know how much I love you... and Maura too." Emily didn't say a word but leaned in and caught her lips in a passionate kiss savoring the feeling of hearing those words as they sunk down in her heart.

I realized I had cut the conversation part of Emily's and JJ's night out and it is necessary. My characters keep my in line... :)

Now on into the ceremony. It is going to take me a moment to write the wedding. I know all the moving parts yes... but it will be one flowing piece. It will be long and as Pen would say just yummy. Now with that said... when I do post it... I urge you to come back and reread these two chapters going into it because it will flow better. Also do not for get to have Youtube up so you can listen to the songs I mention... promise it will be worth the effort.