Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Les Mis. I don't make money from this fic.
November 16, 2000 London, England - Theo's Flat
"Now, son, it's time you learn a lesson about weakness." Theo's father told him, whipping out his wand."When people are weak, they affect those around them, dragging them along in the mud with them like a dead weight. Your mother is a perfect example of this. No matter how I've tried to train her to be the best pureblood she can be, she just doesn't get it."
"But Father, Mother isn't weak! I've seen her take all the punishment you give her with a smile, then she gets right back up." Theo frowned. His mother was the strongest person he knew.
"Her weakness isn't in taking a blow, child, it's in obeying orders to avoid punishment in the first place." his father spat, turning to the woman in the floor before him. "Crucio."
Theo winced. He hated hearing his mother scream. This wasn't the first time, his father had recently taken to torturing his wife almost nightly for what he perceived as shortfallings. Theo was expected to watch, as to study how the Cruciatus Curse worked. Already, he'd been its subject twice before, and knew what his mother was feeling.
"Straighten your face, boy. Now, much like a lame horse, your mother is useless to me, and by extension, you. So what do we do with a lame animal, Theodore?"His father asked him, twirling his wand with a mad look in his eyes. Theo knew the answer to this question and his blood ran cold. His father had murdered a house elf just a few weeks before because it was unable to have dinner ready on time.
"Answer me, boy!" his father snapped, slapping Theo across the face.
"P-put it down, Father." Theo stammered, his eyes on the floor.
"Very good." he said, striding over to the woman in the floor. "Any last words, swine?" Theo's mother looked over at her son. Theo looked up at her cracking, sobbing voice calling his name.
"Theo, please. Remember who you are. I love y-"
"Avada Kedavra!" Theo's vision flash green, and the light left his mother's eyes.
Theo jolted awake, the sight of his dead mother still imprinted on the inside of his eyelids. He checked the bedside clock and cursed under his breath at the realization it was half past five in the morning. He wouldn't be able to go back to sleep easily, anyhow, so he pushed himself up out of bed and headed for the shower.
He normally used a dreamless sleep potion when the nightmares came on strong like this, but he'd run out the night before. The time of year played a role, too, of course. With his mother's death day anniversary around the corner, Theo's mental state was all over the place recently. Added to that, their presentation for the tempus device was scheduled for that morning. Theo knew Hermione would likely arrive early to work, as well, because of the project.
He showered, dressed, and even forced himself to eat a hot breakfast before grabbing his bag and heading to the Ministry. By the time he arrived in his office, it was nearly seven. Theo headed for the coffee pot in the corner, making a whole pot, as he knew Hermione and Draco would likely both want a cup, and he knew he'd need the caffeine throughout the day. As Theo leaned against the desk, he heard the tell-tale sound of the lift down the hall announcing Hermione's arrival. No one else ever showed up before eight. Theo was surprised, though when he heard two voices talking softly, then Draco walked into the office behind Hermione. He nodded to them in greeting.
"Alright there, Theo? You, erm-" Hermione started, looking for the right wording.
"You look like shite, mate." Draco said, cutting to the point. Theo smiled at Draco's bluntness even while Hermione smacked him. "What, he does!"
"I'm alright, just had some trouble sleeping." Theo said, pouring himself a cup of the coffee that had finally finished brewing. Draco's face turned from laughing to concerned in a second.
"Nightmares again?" he asked. Theo nodded.
"You'd think I'd have outgrown them by now. But no, every year. More regular than clockwork." Theo sighed into his coffee.
"I have some dreamless sleep potion I just finished, Theo. Do you want me to bring some over tonight?" Hermione asked, moving over to fix herself some coffee.
"If it won't put you out, that would be amazing." Theo told her. "I just ran out night before last."
"Let me know if you need to talk. If I remember correctly, your nightmares get pretty, er, intense." Draco offered. Theo merely smiled and nodded. He knew Draco would understand his nightmares, his father had been nearly as abusive as Theo's. Hermione, on the other hand- well, he wasn't sure she'd take it well. Neither of them knew the circumstances of his mother's death, and he hadn't been able to tell them much about his nightmares because of it. Theo sighed again, then pushed away from the desk.
"Let's go over our presentation one more time." He said. Hermione gave him a sad, knowing smile and agreed.
"The sooner this presentation is over, the happier we'll all be." Draco said. And Theo couldn't agree more.
November 17, 2000 London, England - Theo and Hermione's Office
"They accepted our research and approved the project!" Hermione squealed excitedly, bursting into the office. "And, they took our advice and made Draco an Unspeakable. This will be his first real project!"
"More exciting than ours. 'Study how and why these time-turners keep destroying themselves.' Ground-breaking, I tell you." Theo muttered. He'd been in a grumpy mood all day from lack of sleep. He hated the way he felt after using dreamless sleep potion, so he only used the bare minimum when he had to use it, which typically resulted in him waking up in the middle of the night, or getting nightmares closer to dawn rather than all night. It was an improvement, but not by much.
"Theo, maybe you should see a Healer? They might be able to prescribe something to help. You've been getting really irritable lately and I-"
"I have not!" Theo snapped, instantly cursing himself when Hermione recoiled. He sighed. "Okay, maybe I have. I just don't think it will help. I'm not good at talking about my problems." Except with Draco.
"Theo, I just don't want you to go into a downward spiral. I know about having nightmares of traumatic events. Why do you think I keep dreamless sleep potion on hand? I know you better than most people; if you don't open up about this, it will fester like an infected wound."
"Damn you, Hermione. I hate it when you're right." Theo muttered. Hermione grinned a little.
"I'm always right." she claimed.
"You've been spending too much time with Draco." He rolled his eyes at her, making up his mind about something. "Can you and Draco come over to my place after work? I think I need to talk about whatever this is that's happening in my head, but it definitely doesn't need to happen at work." Hermione nodded.
"I mean, it's not like we have caused enough scenes in this office before, but I understand. I'll be there. And Draco doesn't know it yet, but so will he." She grinned at him.
"What doesn't Draco know?" Draco asked, walking into the office.
"I could make a list, but that could take a while." Theo said, smiling slightly and feeling a little better at Hermione's reassurance. Draco looked between the two puzzledly, but then shrugged when he saw Theo smiling.
"Well, I suppose it's a good thing I trust you two then. If you need me, I'll be in my office." Draco said with a smile.
"They gave you your own office?" Theo asked incredulously. Draco grinned at the other man widely.
"With full decorating rights, including modification spells." Draco said. "Ergo, I'll be taking out this wall between us. I simply don't understand how the two of you can handle this tiny office!"
"Well, mate, as long as you have some decent taste in decoration, and don't touch my desk, I believe all is right with the world." Theo chuckled. Hermione turned to Draco, her eyes wide.
"Seriously, though. Don't mess with his desk. He gets scary when he can't find what he's looking for." Draco and Theo both devolved into laughter, which Hermione apparently found infectious, for she joined in, too. Perhaps sharing his darkest secret with these two wouldn't be as hard as he thought.
That Night, London, England - Theo's Flat
Theo paced the floor in his living room, trying to figure out what he was going to say to Hermione and Draco. He jumped at the sound of the the doorbell, his heart racing a mile a minute. He must have looked like a mad man, but Draco and Hermione didn't seem disturbed by him, merely frowning at his jumpy behavior. He let them in and led them to the sitting room, where Draco and Hermione sat. Theo, however, resumed his pacing, which had Hermione looking very concerned.
"Theo, you aren't looking well at all. Talk to us, what can we do to help?" Hermione said carefully.
"I'm terrified, Hermione. I have something to tell the two of you, but I'm afraid it will drive one or both of you away or make you think differently of me from here on. I'm so scared I can't think straight." Theo said, his hands shaking. Draco stood up, removing a flask from his pocket and unscrewed the lid, offering it to Theo. Theo looked at Draco like he'd grown a second head, but shrugged and accepted it. Draco wouldn't poison him. Theo took a drink of the liquid in the flask and immediately knew it wasn't alcohol. He felt the tension and anxiety easing, leaving his body. Theo handed the flask back to Draco and sighed heavily, glad that the panic was past him.
"Come sit down and talk to us, mate." Draco said, meeting Theo's eye. Theo nodded and sat in his favorite comfy chair while Hermione watched the two with a clearly surprised reaction. Draco laughed at her expression.
"Calming Draught. Figured at least one of us would need it tonight. Should have taken bets on who it would be at this point it seems." Draco smirked.
"Once again, I'm simultaneously impressed by your intelligence and repulsed by your childishness." Hermione shook her head. "Okay, Theo, what do you need to tell us?" Theo took a deep breath.
"When I was eight, my mother passed away." Theo started. "What most people don't know is how she passed. The story my father told the public was she passed of early onset dragon pox." Theo spat.
"I take it that's not true?" Hermione said, gently.
"Hardly." Theo said, barking a humorless laugh. "It's no secret my father was a Death Eater. My mother was a good pureblood wife, she was quiet, didn't speak unless spoken to, and he still found reasons to call her a useless piece of shit. One day, she was caught fixing me up after my father had bloodied my nose and blacked my eye as a lesson. He snapped." Theo said, looking down. Hermione's face was riddled with horror and Draco's fists were balled up so tightly his knuckles were white.
"He tortured her for hours, forcing me to watch. He told me I was the reason it was happening. Then he said she was the same as a lame horse, a common animal, and he killed her. I wasn't allowed to cry. If I cried, I wouldn't be given dinner for a week." Theo said, his voice sounding hollow. He felt just like he did twelve years ago, scared, alone, and unable to let out the river of emotion he was drowning in.
Suddenly Hermione was on her knees in front of him, looking up into his face.
"Theo, sweetheart, you're allowed to cry now." She whispered sincerely. "We're here for you, love. We won't think any differently of you for mourning a parent. We've both done it."
With that, it seemed as though a mental barrier burst and Theo fell forward, Hermione catching him as he fell to his knees and wrapping his arms around Hermione's neck. Hermione held him close as he cried, cooing softly and rubbing his back. Draco moved over to sit in the floor beside them, his hand on Theo's back. Theo lost track of time as he sat with his friends in the floor of his flat and cried.
He cried for his mother. He cried for all the suffering that had been endured during the war. He cried for all the torture, pain, and heartache he'd gone through over the years to save someone else from doing the same. But most of all, he cried for himself. His tears seemed to wash over his entire body, refreshing him in a way he never experienced. It was like a cool drink after living in the desert for twenty years. He knew the only reason he'd opened up was because the two people sitting there with him cared about him deeply.
After so long, he was finally learning about love. Finally, Theo knew what it meant to have a family.