Chapter 19

Chris wanted to ask her again if she meant what she told her brother, but the next day everything seemed to move in fast motion from the moment Mara woke up to that when they arrived at the apartment. Not one second of privacy presented itself and Chris was resigned to not get an answer anytime soon since he highly doubted William would leave Mara out of his sight until she was fully recovered.

"I feel great!" She assured them both when they gave her a suspicious look upon hearing her tell the nurse her headache was gone.

So what you have to understand by 'until she was fully recovered' is 'until William decides she's fully recovered'. Chris kept his mouth shut and didn't voice his disagreement with William's way of handling the situation – he couldn't risk causing yet another fight with his best friend right after they reconciled.

The moment Mara sat on the edge of her bed and stood up to go change in the bathroom, William extended his arms for her to lean on him in case she felt dizzy, and Chris repressed a snort when he saw the way she sighed and rolled her eyes at her brother's over protective behavior. She wasn't exactly a cry baby, Mara wasn't one to complain about anything unless it was extremely serious or it was happening to someone she cared about. If Chris gets a split lip it's the end of the world, but she could be coughing up blood and she would still crack a joke and claim everything was peachy. This made her simultaneously brave and unreliable when it came to self-care.

"I don't need you to get dressed," she huffed and walked past William as though he was merely an annoying child trying to get her attention.

She did look great - Chris had to give her that – but then again, he always thought she looked great. His state of utter awe of his girlfriend backfired since he didn't decipher the symptoms of her unwellness until it was too late. However, they both went through some tough times and getting up and going to school was the closest they got to being fine in weeks, therefore Chris wasn't being too strict with himself.

Besides, he was still pumped by what he overheard the day before – it kept him awake most of the night – and he couldn't wait to finally have a moment of privacy with Mara to question her about it. Frankly, he couldn't picture Mara saying something like this lightly, which both thrilled him and scared him to fucking death. Somewhere, deep down, he knew that she meant it but he still needed to hear the words from her mouth.

Somehow he thought he was – or became – better at reader her reactions than her very own brother. William disregarded her attempts at doing things by herself and carried her bag, opened the doors for her and even went as far as to fill in her the hospital papers for her – all of which annoyed her to no end. Not that she didn't enjoy the treatment, she merely disapproved the reason behind it.

"I hope you don't think your sudden change of behaviour regarding Chris and I will make me forget how much of a douche you've been for the past weeks. Almost two weeks of giving me the cold shoulder won't go away with a little kindness, I demand an explanation and it better be a good one – with introduction, development and conclusion," Mara warned William who fought back the urge to smile at that and accepted the challenge.

"It's not a joke man," Chris told him when Mara was out of earshot. "She's pissed, you have no idea."

William wanted to object that he did have an idea, but even he knew that he couldn't be sure about it and therefore may be wrong. Mara was pissed, that was for sure. The question was: to what extend? She was pretty nice to him yesterday – mainly due to her attempt to sooth his worries and her concussion – but now that she was back in shape, who knew what she would make him endure to redeem himself?

"And you're not?" Will asked eventually, turning to his friend as he signed the papers to leave the hospital – he hated this place.

"Oh I am, believe me. But I'm not nearly as imaginative as her when it comes to finding original ways to punish you for being an ass and hiding stuff from us." At that, William cocked a brow. "I mean- we did too, but it didn't have any consequences, at least, not like this."

At that, William looked down at his feet. Mara interrupted their conversation and told them to hurry up, gesturing them to walk faster – she probably hated this place even more than William. Since William came in the ambulance with Mara, the three of them drove back to the siblings' apartment in Chris' car, in an rather awkward silence, until finally they stepped inside and Mara began to blurt out hundreds of questions. Except that William didn't answer any of them until he decided she was safe and sound. Chris played a small role in the whole thing, though Mara still felt like they were being dramatic about the situation. The boys kept looking after her as though she were a poor, fragile little thing that needed to be handled gently and taken care of.

"Guys, would you please stop babysitting me? I'm perfectly fine! If you're just trying to postpone this conversation William, you'r-" Mara began but she was interrupted mid-sentence.

"You hear what the nurse said: you're too stressed. Why don't you just relax for today? We can't still talk about it tomorrow, I'm not going anywhere," William said in this scolding brotherly tone that caused Mara to once again roll her eyes into the next dimension.

Chris still didn't budge or say anything, but he shot him a surprised glance. Was he chickening out of this? It's not like it could be any worse at this point, Mara's opinion of her brother could only improve if he came clean – though she was most definitely going to smack him upside the head a few times and yell a bit before coming around.

"This is me being extremely relaxed Will, now if you want to see a not-so-chill version of me, you just keep up that attitude and we'll get there in no time."

His eyes darted toward Chris, begging for help but the latter simply raised his hands and said, "That's your mess to clean up!" He took place next to Mara on the couch and leaned his elbows on his knees before joining his hands, patiently waiting for William to start speaking.

If they let Mara do, she would be pacing around the living room like a caged lion, but instead she was tucked in a blanket.

"Listen," she started, first looking at Chris then shifting her gaze back to William. "I'm sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, surrounded by pillows. I couldn't even hurt myself if I tried and I'm feeling fine, you can't use my health as an excuse not to tell me. So now you sit down, and spill your guts before I lose my cool."

In a rather mechanical movement, William sat down on the couch facing Mara and Chris. They weren't touching in any way, they weren't looking at each other, yet he could sense how close they were – they moved according to each other, their body language spoke volumes right now. They were like two magnets and he felt dumb for never noticing before – unless it was new? There was no way to know now.

Mara really wasn't as threatening as she would have liked to be at the moment, wrapped in her blanket like a burrito. Nevertheless, her fiery glare finished to convince William that Chris was right: she was beyond pissed, and he needed to talk – now. Chris was infinitely grateful not to be on the receiving end of Mara's death glare – for once. Her patience had clearly worn out somewhere between the first time she asked her brother to explain himself and the hundredth time.

"I don't even know where to start," William eventually said, gulping down thickly.

"The beginning," Mara said in a click of her tongue as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Then I should probably start with an apology. I owe you both one, especially to you Chris," William said and turned to his friend. "When I told Mara that none of my friends were good enough for her, I didn't mean it in a malicious way, I only wanted to keep her from getting hurt but it was shitty nonetheless. I'm sorry. And I'm sorry-" he continued, turning to Mara again. "-for my reaction when you told me you were dating. I realised it was exaggerated but it came as such a shock, it was a serious blow to the trust I placed in you both. I'm not saying it was justified, I just want you to know why I reacted the way I did. I understand why you kept it from me, even if I don't like it. Again, I'm sorry."

"Thank you," Mara said with a nod, gracefully accepting the apology but not answering with the usual "it's okay", because it wasn't.

"I didn't only come to this conclusion yesterday though. As soon as I realised you had sneaked out through your window and left with Chris I knew I had fucked up. Very badly."

Chris snorted and looked away. He leaned back against the couch and it drew Mara's attention to him. Whatever he wanted to say he must have swallowed back because he remained quiet and silently enjoined Will to resume.

"If you had taken your phone with you, I think this whole thing would have turned out differently, but since I had no way to contact you apart from directly going to Chris' place, I decided to give you time to calm down and the next morning, I had an idea. An idea which involved not speaking to either of you for a while," William finished and waited for a reaction.

"That doesn't make sense," Mara scoffed, bringing her curled fingers to her mouth in a thoughtful position. "What made you change you mind? Had an epiphany in your dreams?" She asked in a conceited tone.

"I didn't even sleep at all during that night. I was so mad, at you two yeah, but mostly at those bastards the Yakuza. It was all my fault, I knew it before you even told me. The bottle I smashed on of my the guys' head was the reason for my little sister and my best friend to get beaten up, it was unacceptable. They wanted me, and they kind of hit exactly where it hurt most: they attacked the two people I care most about to reach me."

"Still doesn't explain anything," Mara snapped at him, growing impatience.

Chris' hand came to rest on her forearm and it seemed to be enough to make her simmer down a bit and stop being so harsh toward her brother. It was stupendous how they interacted. Mara quickly uncrossed her arms and laced her fingers with his before William continued his explaining, hardly managing to detach his eyes from their joined hands.

"I thought – and I know now it was a flawed strategy – that if they thought you weren't in y good graces anymore, then there wouldn't be any reason for them to hurt you again until I found a solution."

"Now you're just stretching it out to create suspense," Mara said, rolling her eyes. "Spit it out, Will. You told Chris, right? Then why can't you simply tell me. Be concise."

"You asked for the whole story, stop being so impatient!" He protested.

The two siblings smiled a little at that, as though they had missed their playful banter.

"I push you away because I wanted it to become public. I needed everyone to know – to think – that I turned my back on you. It was the quickest and easiest way I found to make sure you would be spared from whatever shit storm was coming. I planned a fight with the Yakuza to settle our issues once and for good, I was hoping they'd became over confident since they thought I was upset because I just lost my two best friends, I wanted to use it at our advantage. I know I was harsh on you, but I thought it was for the best, I couldn't have either of you involved in this, not after what happened at your date."

"Your plan didn't even work and you ended up dragging Chris into a fight he wasn't ready for, was it worth letting us think you never wanted to have anything to do with us anymore?" Mara asked, biting her tongue to not say something she would regret. He was so fucking stupid, how could they even be related? A few weeks ago she never would have thought her brother capable of such a thoughtless decision. "You could have told us. We could have played along if that was what you wanted, but instead you made everything a mess!"

"I was still mad okay?!" Will snapped. "I wanted you safe, but I still felt betrayed and I didn't exactly feel obliged to share this with you after what I had just discovered about you two."

"You were still mad, that you're excuse? Is that why you dragged Chris in the second fight? Because you were mad?" Mara almost spat out, squeezing tight on Chris' hand to help her calm down.

"I'm fine now, there's no need to discuss this fight anymore," Chris tried to interject to make them both settle down a bit. "I forced his hand, I refused to give way and leave when he not so subtly told me to fuck off."

"I was rude because I needed you to be pissed enough to leave," Will sighed as though he had already explained this a thousand times and was tired of saying it. "But you and your obstinate mind got in the way of my plan. If I knew you were still hurt from last week I never would have carried it out, but you seemed fine until-" William paused and Mara finished for him.

"Until he wasn't."

"Yeah. Until he wasn't. I told Elias to get you home and make sure you were okay, at least until Mara came back."

"The harm was done I think," Chris replied. "And he didn't stay, he just dropped me off and waited until I was inside to drive away."

"I'm sorry for what happened, man," Will apologized once more. "I knew something was wrong, especially when neither of you showed up at school the next day, but when I tried to call you to explain-"

The rest of the sentence was left unsaid but they all knew what happened then. Mara and Chris dived their head in the sand and ignored William's persistent calls or texts, Mara even went as far as to punch him when he eventually gave up on trying to reach them on their phone and showed up on their doorstep.

"I was so worried but at least Noora had some good news to give me. Since when are you friends?" Will suddenly asked Mara.

She shrugged and pouted.

"Not long," she said. "She's nice, we hit it off at school."

A fond smile replaced William's stern expression at that.

"It was horrible to lie to her," he told her. "But I knew she would react the same way as you and call me dumb before demanding I get my shit straight and talk to you, so I didn't tell her my plan. She was genuinely trying to make things better between us whenever she told me about how she saw you that day and you told her about Chris and you and she thought it was endearing. I had the hardest time keeping it together."

"Good," Chris and Mara said at the same time and smiled at each other.

"Why were you arguing with Chris yesterday? You just said you realised your mistake after the fight, then why argue again as soon as we come back to school?" Mara questioned, obviously determined not to leave any unanswered questions.

"That's my fault," Chris said to her utmost surprise. He looked at their joined hands and only met her insistent stare after a few seconds. "William was trying to explain all of this to me, and I completely flipped and it escalated quickly. It's my fault if you-"

"-don't even say it," she cut him off. "It was nobody's fault, it was a deadly combination of exhaustion and stress that led to this."

And certainly not Chris. He had stood by her no matter what during the last months, whether it be before or after William found out – could it be only ten days ago? - he put up with her shit and more, he loved her for it.

"William," Mara then called his name and focused back on him. "You tell Noora the truth."

"I will," he promised, raising his right hand.

"And no more keeping things from us on the ground that it's for our own good," she added."It was fucking stupid."

At some point, she had crossed her arms again, as if she needed to physically manifest how mad she was through a defiant stance accompanied by a hard stare. William had seen her eyes shift to Chris several times throughout his explanation. It's not like she could help it, she wanted to see his reaction too – a little part of her was scared that Will's revelations might upset Chris and that they would be back to square one, all mad at each other. But he didn't budge. There was no reaction to gauge because he was expressionless. It was the same story William must have served him the day before after all, but he was still impressively impassible. Actually, it didn't even seem like he was listening to his friend, he eyes were trained either ahead of him or on Mara in this unsettling and intense manner.

"You're a goddamn cretin, William," Mara declared. "There are so many different ways you could have handled this!"

"That's more or less what I told him yesterday," Chris said, agreeing with her and chuckling faintly.

"I know I am," William admitted. "I didn't mean any harm though, it- it all got out of my control real quick and I was in too deep to turn around. The fight happened and I knew I had to tell you everything but you wouldn't listen – understandably so-"

"You should have told us." Chris shook his head. "Mara's right, we would have agreed to play along, we could have pretended to fight, but this- this," he stammered and Mara came to his rescue when the words wouldn't come out anymore.

"This was a catastrophe! I'm never letting you make plans on your own again, and once you tell Noora I'm sure she'll agree with me," Mara laughed bitterly.

"Listen, I know it was a complete failure. But believe me, I thought about other ways to deal with this, and my conclusion was that I couldn't both be honest and keep you safe so I made a choice – a bad one, I get it now, but a conscious choice. It wasn't my most brilliant idea but if there was a chance of you not being involved in this whole thing, I had to take it. If I had told you what I had in mind, there would have been no way for me to keep Chris out of the second fight, you know it."

Mara brought her lips into a thin line and Chris guiltily stared at the floor.

"The priority was to make sure you were far away if things went downhill," William concluded.

"It went downhill anyway," Chris felt the need to point out. "I never thought I'd experience the expression 'beaten to a pulp'."

"You're not helping bro," William whined.

"I'm not supposed to help you man, I'm the one you're apologizing to too. Mara looks fine as hell, but I'm still wearing a flippin' black eye and a gash, I look like Scarface in the not cool sense of it."

"I know, I know, I'm sorry," William said yet again.

"Al right, al right, I think there's been plenty of apologizing today. All this woke up my damn headache," Mara suddenly said. "But just so you know, we're far from even. I'll make you regret this for the rest of your life, big brother," she warned William. "And from now on, I'm officially the decision maker of the Magnusson household."

"I second that," Chris laughed.

"That's not fair, you're biased!" Will complained. "Give me a break, it's the first time I fuck up this bad."

"Last year you forgot to pay the water bill and it cut off while I was in the shower," Mara said. "And once, you thought it would be cool to surprise mum with a kitten for her birthday, and then it turned out she was allerg-"

"Okay, I get it, you make decisions from now on," he grumbled and leaned back in the couch.

"Oh wait a sec'," Chris said, suddenly smiling from ear to ear. "I never heard that shower story before, I want to know what happened next!"

"She mostly screamed at me until I went out to buy water bottles so she could rinse out," William snickered at the memory. "It only happened once!" He argued when he saw Mara squint her eyes at him.

"Rest assured that from now on if I need anything while I'm in the shower, I'll call Chris."

She smirked as she told him that and while Chris' expression mirrored hers; William only made a face between utter disgust and fondness and stood up, pretending to be grossed out and leaving them alone for a little while so they could process all the information he dumped on them.

"That's bit too much to take in all at once," Mara said as soon as she was alone with Chris.

"Once you reach rock bottom you can only climb up," Chris philosophized and smiled. "At least now we're good with William."

"He's still a dick and I'll get back to him," she scoffed. "I'm tired, I think I'll take a nap. You two should go back to class, it's almost noon and you can't keep this up or you'll get expelled."

"I'm not leav-"

"I'll be fine, Chris. I'll stay here and sleep, nothing'll happen to me," Mara promised. "We'll see each other tomorrow at school."

"I don't care if I get kicked out, I'm not leaving your vicinity until I'm sure you're fine," Chris objected, his stance shifting to a more defensive one. "You can't make me go."

"I can't, but he can," Mara replied, pointing toward the far end of the room.

Sure enough Chris' eyes fell on William, standing cross legged and leaning against the wall, his backpack already swung over his shoulder in a casual manner.

"He can try," Chris challenged William, leaning back in the couch and crossing his arms on his chest.

His brows flew up, as if he were waiting for Will to make a move and physically drag him away from his sister and out the door. Mara wanted to roll her eyes – she seemed to be doing that a lot more lately – when she saw Chris' stance. He was sitting in this typically manly fashion, taking more room than necessary on the couch with his spread legs and looking pissed at William for siding with her.

"C'mon," Mara said and stood up, offering her hand to Chris. "Don't be a grump, now."

"I'll wait by the car," William told them before exiting.

"It's my car and you can walk, man, I'm not driving you!" Chris shouted after him, though he was already out of earshot.

He tore his eyes from the closed door and focused back on Mara whose hands she placed against his chest, effectively making him calm down. But Chris simply frowned and looked down at her.

"Don't give me that look," he said. Mara's doe eyes remained trained on him, knowing exactly what she was doing. "Mara-" Chris continued with a warning tone, merely causing the small smile on her face to stretch a bit. "This is manipulation."

"Is it working?" She asked, gently running her hands up his chest to his shoulders, pretending to be smoothing out the folds of his sweater.

A sound between a groan and a sigh fell from his lips and he visibly relaxed under her touch. She tried not to give in to the triumphant smile that threatening to split her face in two. Her hands once again moved up to his neck before cupping his face in her palms.

"It's weird to have you back here, the house'll feel empty," he blurted out, puzzling her. "I guess we'll have to go back to not sharing a bed every night and living apart. It's just weird," he repeated, as if it was a fact he had trouble coming to terms with.

They had never planned on making it last anyway, but now that things slowly returned to what they used to be, they found themselves sad to part, no matter how short the separation.

"Getting all sappy on me?" Mara teased him.

"If you tell anyone I'll deny it," he dead panned. "How long is it acceptable to make William wait in the street?" He wondered out loud.

The young Magnusson giggled and stood on her tiptoes to gently place her lips against his, finally enjoying the little moment of intimacy they were allowed today. She pulled back just long enough to say, "I think he can wait two more minutes." Chris smirked against her skin and captured her lips again, eagerly returning the kiss, as though he had been starved of her for far too long a time and he was now determined to make up for it – even if it meant leaving William to wait in the cold.