Chapter IV

It was like a repetition of the dream Hester had when she was standing on the platform of the train station of the Glen St Mary once again. She felt as if the last time she was there, when Gil left with Marshall for England, she wasn't really there and that that day never really happend. It was as if God was playing a trick on her, making her to pretend that that day and the day she was now facing again were in fact the one and only reality.

The station once again was full with young boys in khaki uniforms and their families, friends and sweethearts. The only thing different about this day compared to the one in January, was that it was extremely hot and the sky was entirely cloudless. Selwyn's face showed his gratitude for the weather on that day, Hester could easily see it on his face and so could the others.

John and Walt were so excited for catching a train to their "breeze of adventure" that nobody seemed to worry too much about those two, their spirits that is. Selwyn however wasn't excited, as it was expected from him, but he wasn't scared either as he told his parents and his sister a day before at the last family dinner they all shared. He felt relieved that he enlisted and he still felt that way, on that day at the train station when he was about to face his own reality of the war.

This time more members of Hester's family were at the station, all patiently waiting for the arrival of the train which was still dreaded by everyone, by every single person at the station. Hester was dressed in her best dress and she also put on her half-hat in the same colour of her dress which was lilac. She looked like a movie star even though she was just sixteen years old and shy, she also wore no make-up in contrast to Jo Meredith, John's older sister of course.

Even though Jo's character was just as it always had been which could be described as spiteful, and simply not understandable in any way, on that day her eyes were full of tears and the only reason she was stopping them from rolling down her cheeks was the mascara she was wearing. Jo was really afraid for her brother because it seemed that he was the only person, along with her parents and all the people older than her, whom she treated with an utter respect out of all her cousins, that including Hester.

John had his secret hidden deep underneath his khaki uniform and behind a smile upon his beautiful young face, which by the way was a spitting image of his father Jerry. Even though hurt could be seen clearly in his eyes when Cornelia was putting her trembling hands on her fiance's, Walt's, cheeks, he was fighting with it bravely as if preparing himself for the other kind of fight he would soon have to face.

Lily was on her own mission that day. She was the brightest spot at the train station, she was smiling, laughing, cheering, singing and even dancing. All of her clothes and so her dress, hat and shoes were yellow, for luck and happiness as she said to Hester an hour before they all headed off to the train station. Lily was chuckling happily with her older brother Walt as well as whispering some funny little stories of hers into John's ear just to see him smile and keep his mind off something he knew he couldn't have. Hester knew the reason behind Lily's actions on that day, Lily knew that that was the only thing she knew she was good at at times like this and that was to make everyone around her happy and she was doing a splendid job indeed, even though her hands trembled when nobody was looking. Hester couldn't help but smile herself when she was looking at Lily. She was so proud of her that she could keep so positive and optimistic as well as so… joyful even on that day of days which that particular day definitely was for both Lily and Hester.

But then her eyes would drift off to Marion, Lily's and Walt's younger sister, and Hester would sigh wistfully. Poor Marion was doing her best to keep smiling, looking up to both her friend and a sister Lily but her fragile soul didn't allow her to smile as much as she wanted to. That is why her shoulders were surrounded by Walt's to give her more hope and courage just as much as he had himself.

Hester looked up to Selwyn's face and he looked down at her own and they both smiled at each other lightly, Selwyn drawing his sister closer to him. "Maybe I'll meet Gilly over there one day." he whispered suddenly, looking straight ahead at the sea of people in front of him. Hester shivered when he said "over there". His tone when he said it was very stern and strange as if it wasn't Selwyn speaking but some stranger she didn't know.

"You never know, son. You might." Ken said gently and patted Selwyn on the shoulder, a grin stitched painfully to his lips.

"I will be sending you as many apple pies as I can, alright, my dear?" Rilla said suddenly, her voice nervous over the thought that Selwyn might be afraid himself that she wouldn't send as many pastries as he knew she would.

Selwyn chuckled, his old spirit showing through his grey eyes "Mother, you really don't have to." he said finally and Rilla only waved her hand and kissed his cheek.

"Of course I do." she said decidedly "What are mothers for, my darling?" she said to him, patting his cheek softly with a tender smile on her lips.

Hester and Selwyn smiled at each other knowingly and then at their mother. But before anyone thought of something to say, a long and loud whistle of a train filled the air and just like in January, everyone stopped chatting and even stopped moving at the sound of it.

But with it came a faint, very faint sound of the Piper playing. The sound came from everywhere and Hester was certain then, she was reassured that she was not mistaken in January when Gilly and Marshall were going away to the front and she knew then that she did hear the Piper piping softly but on that day in August his music was clearer somehow. The music made her shiver and caused the hairs on her arms to stand on their ends fearfully, although it was an unbelievably warm day.

Everyone clung to their precious young boys instantly.

Rilla put her hands on Selwyn's cheeks and closed her eyes when their foreheads met. She couldn't help but think about Walter, her own brother, whose soul and the view of the world was so very alike to her younger son's and she couldn't push the thought away, that terrible thought which was that maybe Selwyn's destiny was like Walter's. Rilla opened her eyes though and smiled bravely through that thought. She kissed her son twice on each of his cheeks "Never fear and never regret anything, my darling boy. I will always be with you, here." she pointed to Selwyn's heart and Selwyn kissed her own cheek whispering "I love you, mum." into her ear.

Ken quickly embraced Selwyn then, also whispering to him that he is so very proud of him and that Selwyn is to write to them as often as he can. Ken let go of his son finally and then came to Rilla and put his arms around her, breathing just as heavily as she was. "I'm even more glad that Hester isn't a boy now, Rilla-my-Rilla." he said to her softly, still looking at Selwyn who was making his way over to Hester.

"Me too." Rilla whispered back and Ken kissed her forehead softly both knowing that even though Hester wasn't a boy and couldn't go off to the front like her brothers, she was still exposed to pain and fear, a different kind but still she could be facing both sooner or later.

Selwyn came over to his young sister and kissed her nose with a sweet light grin on his lips as if to give himself and her too strength for two different journeys both of them were about to take "Always write to me Hester, I know that from all the people I will need your letters the most." he said to her and Hester wrapped her arms around him quickly, afraid to let him go.

"I will write to you every single day, Selwyn." she said to him decidedly, her voice shaking a bit "Please, be careful." she whispered and closed her eyes tightly not to allow any tears roll down her cheeks.

"Always." he whispered back and smiled at her one more time.

Suddenly someone kissed Hester at the forehead and she knew it must have been John and then someone else hugged her from behind, this must have been Walt of course. It was all a blur, the whistle of the train was loud and the Piper was faintly playing, still playing.

The three friends and cousins were waving to their families as the train started to move faster and faster. Lily and Marion suddenly took hold of Hester's hands and were all cheering their hearts out for them, even though soft tears were falling down on all of their flushed cheeks.

"They will come back." Lily whispered as if to herself, her smile still widening on her face "They're our boys. They will."

Even though both Hester and Marion smiled at that hopefully neither of them had the courage to agree with Lily outloud.

21st August 1940

Dearest Hester,

You have no idea how sorry I am not to be able to answer your letter earlier than today. I know that being busy with my studies and my parents insisting on me studying hard even though I do have holidays and no school yet, is an explanation. I know you will forgive me, you always do because you have such kind heart but I really do feel sorry and ashamed of myself because I know that you always reply to my letters in a time of one day.

I am very glad that you got through the day of your brother and your cousins leaving for their training quite well. I am very proud of you, you know. You are so strong and you don't give yourself enough credit for many things.

I am also very glad that you are always keeping me updated on everything happening in your life. It sometimes seems to me that even if I was to be going to see you tomorrow we wouldn't have anything new to share with one another, I know everything what's going on in Prince Edward Island and you know everything that is happening in New York.

I cannot believe that the British withdrew from the Italians! I was so hopeful that they would win this invasion but they didn't of course and it makes my blood run wild. And now Germans are really bombing Great Britian and I don't know what to think about it at all. The only thing that keeps me positive about that is that Gil and Marshall are there, as you wrote to me, to defend it. I have more faith in them than the whole British army right now. But enough of the war news now, I know that you don't feel comfortable while listening to them or reading them for that matter too.

Now, you ask me what I think about the situation with Lily and John. It's a shame that Lily and I don't correspond half as often as we do, Hester. But then everything happens for a reason, doesn't it?

I wasn't even surprised when you wrote to me that Lily actually kissed John before he jumped on that train with Walt and Selwyn, she was always wild and I know that fact myself. But it is a great dissapointment that John didn't kiss her back. I don't quite know how Lily must be feeling about all of this and that is why I admire her for her strength to do that.

However, Hester, just like you I think that "on one sunny day" he will regain his senses and realise that Lily is the one and only for him and if not, I will strangle him myself. And do not protest to that, Hes.

It's still quite amazing to think that one of your cousins who is indeed just two years older than us, Walt I mean, is already engaged! It makes me feel very strange indeed, just like you said how it made you feel.

I sometimes think that I'm not the marrying type at all, you know. What I mean is that I would like to be married one day (which if it will happen at all, it will probably happen when I'm fifty years old, judging on how long it takes a girl to finally just like me, eh, Hester?) but I just don't think that any girl would be ever interested in marrying a man like me.

Just look at me, my friend. An average looking boy with very strange techniques on how to make a girl like him (remember this one particular girl, this black-haired girl of a name Hester?) and also with a very non-existing wanting to go to the war once he will turn eighteen. Quite boring, weird and an anti-patriotic man, isn't he?

Answering your question, yes I still want to become a lawyer, just like Lily does. But I'm not sure to which university I want to go yet, I still have two more years to decide though. But I'm happy to finally hear what kind of future you would like to have my friend. A music teacher, very nice and so much like you, and possibly a player in the orchestra you say? I like the second option very much too. Whatever you decide, I'll always believe in you, you know that, right?

Oh, dear God in Heaven, I forgot to go to the shop and buy Mother all the groceries she asked me to buy... I just noticed the list lying just next to me on my desk… So I have to go although I would still love to write more in this letter for you! But later I have to study History, again!

To apologise for my insuboridnation, I'm sending you this cameo I found in the shop recently (since I know you love brooches and I love seeing the photographs you send me wearing the ones I buy for you). The shopkeeper said it's from about the end of nineteenth century and the face of the woman engraved in it is to be the shopkeeper's mother apparently. Very pretty, isn't she?

I will write to you as soon as I can,

Remember that I will always be your loving and proud friend,

Phillip

6th September 1940,

Dear Diary,

It is officially a whole week gone, my very first week at the new school, the Music School for which I was and still am excited and thrilled about.

The first day was very stressful for me though. I didn't know anyone as obviously Vance and Marion went to the High School in the Lower Glen because they're not musicians, although, oh, I so wish they were!

When I was walking through the doors of this new school of mine I was thinking about how brave, so very brave my brothers are and so I faced my fear with less shaky hands than I thought I would.

It was actually a very nice and an interesting week. My mind during the lessons was occupied with thoughts not concerning the war, athough I couldn't help but think about Gilly flying all over Engalnd and Selwyn being trained at the camp too. I made a friend there and that was why my mind wasn't as occupied with those thoughts as I thought it might be. Flora her name is and she is also a violinist (like me) and she simply couldn't believe me when I told her that I also play a cello and a little bit of piano.

She is a very small but resolute creature, Flora is. She has the most fluffy, brown bob of a hair and the darkest eyes I have seen, even darker than Uncle Jerry's and his son's, John's that is. She's always excited about everything and uses italics in her every speech but I don't mind, she's funny too. She lives in Lowbridge but travels with her father to school in his car because he works in Glen and that's why he can give her a lift every morning and also after school. Flora too wants to become an orchestra member, just like me and actually most of the students in our new school.

I really like her but somehow I have a feeling that there's a dangerous aura about her, I don't even know why I have this feeling exactly because she's so nice to me but even my parents told me that if I have a feeling like that I better start be more careful around her and I will take their advice to my heart.

Nonetheless I'm very glad that I met her, at least I have someone to spend a break with, not like when we were still living in Toronto and I had absolutely no one to share my thoughts with. Also Flora and I sit together in every single class which is a nice feeling too.

I don't think that apart from Flora there's any other person in my class whom I could ever consider my kindred spirit. I know it's unfair for me to say such a thing but I just don't think that other people who I see at my new school are the kind of people who would be interested in being my friend and I don't mind that as long as Flora will be my friend.

So I suppose that I am happier this week, not only because I met Flora but also because I started attending the school's orchestra so that is something of my dream slowly becoming a reality of mine.

I pray for my brothers, John, Walt and even for Marshall too every single night. I know that God will keep them all safe for as long as He can but I also know that so many other girls like me, millions of them, pray for their own brothers, cousins and friends too so I suppose that God has lots of work to do right now.

Selwyn is doing fine at the camp he wrote to me recently, and also that he's slowly getting used to his daily routines there. He says that he's meant to leave for the front in December with John and Walt of course and they won't let them come home for Christmas like they let Gilly and Marshall the year before. This makes me unbearably sad but Selwyn told me to keep smiling for him and so I will.

Gilly is fighting the Germans in Britain and he says that he's in different cities and towns every single day. He says he likes that very much, he always liked travelling "but I never thought that that would be the way I would travel around the entire United Kingdom!". He says that he and Marshall are keeping each other's company and are safe for now so that's one very good news.

My eyes are going to close in a second so I will finish for today.

All in all, this first week of school was very uplifting because it was simply better than I expected it to be. I am truly ready to say that although slowly, I am getting happier and less melancholy each day.

Goodnight then,

Yours always,

Hester