A/N: I HAVE WAITED SO LONG FOR THIS CHAPTER OMG.

I'm not sure how many people who follow this actually read my oneshots but in Bring Me to My Knees I mentioned that it is stand alone but based on Asami from this fic. This is the chapter that a section of that fic is referring to. I'm now going to eat my feelings with some icecream I got especially for today as a reward for writing out this chapter haha

"Sir, we have received the final report from Ueda."

Asami looked up at his secretary and let himself be pulled from his dark musing. He had been in a meeting with an important client when the events with Akihito had unfolded and only been given a brief overview of what had happened from Suoh who had been called directly about how to proceed. He had instantly been taken over by a cold rage at the thought of someone trying to set up Akihito and potentially harm him. Unfortunately he still had one more late night meeting or he would have already been on his way to the club. He nodded at Kirishima to continue.

"He was able to get a few details before the woman succumbed to the drug that she had swallowed in Takaba's stead. The woman has since been taken to the closest hospital, her reaction to the drug was severe. Mizuno Aneka, 26 years old and not officially employed. She was hired by a 'Chiyo' and promised a large amount of money should she successfully slip Takaba the drug and 'take advantage' of situation. She was told that they would know if she succeeded immediately and was supplied with the drug. She referred to it as liquid ecstasy, a street name for GHB. It suggests an inside job, especially with how personal in nature it is. The plan seems designed more towards you, Asami-sama and causing a fall out between you and Takaba. Your stance on betrayal is well known."

Asami leaned back in his chair and fixed Kirishima with a hard look. "This reeks of Sudou."

The secretary nodded. "Sudou has not left his house this evening or conducted any suspicious activity recently. Only going to and from the club, his home and a few other very public locations. Regardless, I concur."

Asami grunted. "That means he has rats in the club doing his bidding."

"I believe so."

"Find them."

Kirishima nodded again before pushing up his glasses. He seemed almost tentative. "Asami-sama, if I may." He waited for Asami to indicate him to continue. "I would like to suggest not punishing the woman further. Her reaction to the drug will leave her in hospital for some time yet, I believe that is apt punishment considering." Asami scowled but finally nodded his agreeance. "We also need to continue to tail Sudou for some time longer. We have yet to discover what he is doing with Ichikawa, it may be dangerous to remove Sudou until we know exactly what is going on."

Asami took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. He was right, he knew he was right. But he was itching to put a bullet between Sudou's eyes. "Fine." He gritted out. "But I want to know the minute we get more information."

"Of course, sir."

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Akihito was rather drunk. In fact, nearly the entire group was drunk. Takato sighed and looked over the table with fond amusement. A few were still off dancing while Kou and Yoshida were chatting up a pair of girls. Another conversation was taking place on the other side of their booth and he was, of course, stuck being completely sober with a drunk Akihito. Who had devolved into talking only about his soulmate with a few slips of the tongue that provided Takato with far more information than he really wanted to ever know. He really, really didn't want to know that his friend was learning how to deep throat successfully. Nope, he really didn't need that mental image. Hopefully he didn't get any more information about Asami's dick before actually met the man. Even better if he didn't get any more R rated oversharing from his drunk friend at all. Thankfully Akihito was now sitting with his head pressed against the table and not actually speaking.

The guard who seemed to be in charge of Akihito's security force strolled over and dumped a water bottle on the table above the photographers head. He lifted his head at the sound.

"Please drink the whole thing Takaba-sama."

Akihito groaned and let his head slump back down. "'s too hard. The room won't shtop spinin'."

Takato reached over and opened the bottle for him, sharing an amused look with the guard. "I've got him." The man nodded and moved back to his position near the VIP entrance. He poked his friends shoulder and made him sit up and take the water. "Come on Aki-chan, he's right."

"Whhhhhy?"

Takato raised his eyebrows. "Because no one wants to deal with a shitty, hung over you in the morning. You know drinking water helps right?"

"Tha's not what I meeaant. Why chan? Why you tooooo?"

"Oh. Your guards have been calling you Takaba-sama all night. I'm not about to let it go to your head."

Akihito pouted and grumbled, "'s only becaussse they know I dun like it."

"Really?"

"I needed to clear my head earlier. Sooooo, I went running. Acrosssh roof top. They didna like it. 's pay back."

"I see." Takato chuckled at little at the disgruntled look on his friends face. That was a pretty funny way to get one back. It made sense though, they were his guards, and they couldn't do anything that would be unprofessional. This way that was very far from being a problem. It was quite clever really.

"Ooh, I found out about 'Sami. Why he wash bein' weird. 'is girlfriend and friend died in front of him. He blamed hisself. I jush don' know how to take away tha' pain."

Oh wow. That was a lot more serious than he had thought. "We should talk about this when you are sober. Although knowing you, you'll put your foot in it well before that and somehow sort it out yourself."

Akihito pouted at him but finally accepted the water and drunk half the bottle in one go. The photographer continued to mumble under his breath but Takato left him to it. He made his way over to the bar and got a few more bottles of water to hand out. It was a good idea to start on the others too. May as well try and make it so they are less miserable tomorrow. He was just approaching the table to start handing out the bottles when he noticed a one of Akihito's guards bowing slightly to another man who had paused beside him. He was tall and imposing, dressed in a well-tailored suit with slicked back dark hair and dangerous aura. That matched a certain friend's description of their new soulmate.

The man started to head over and Takato dumped the bottles on their table and leaned over to poke Akihito's shoulder. He raised his head off the table again and unfocused blue eyes blinked at him dazedly. "Hey, I think your man's here."

Akihito blinked at him before comprehension dawned. He sat up and looked around before zeroing in on the man approaching. "'Sami!" His friend tried to launch himself from the booth but his coordination was not there and he stumbled, falling into Asami's arms. "'Sami." The blonde buried his face in his soulmates chest and wrapped his arms around him. He watched as the man immediately moved his arms to wrap around his friend in return.

Takato smiled at the sight. "You must be Asami-san." Golden eyes looked up and locked on him.

"And you must be Takato?"

He nodded in return. "It's nice to finally meet you. Especially after the earful I got tonight."

Asami raised an eyebrow. "Oh?" Takato watched in amusement as the man pried Akihito's wandering hands away and moved them to his back and trapped both of his wrists in one hand. It was altogether far too efficient and an almost practised movement. Akihito didn't seem to mind one bit and if anything was wriggling in his grip more while giving him bedroom eyes. Takato really didn't need that little insight into their relationship.

"He's a very open and well, oversharing drunk. I really don't want to know any more about your private lives." He laughed. "The drunker he got, the more he spoke of you and the more likely he was to accidentally over share." Asami smirked at him and looked down at his soulmate in amusement. "One of his guards started feeding him water so hopefully he'll be okay."

"I'm fiiiine. Totesssss fine." Akihito's voice was muffled against the fabric that he had buried his face into. Both Takato and Asami shared an amused look.

"We'll have to get you some more water on the way back." Akihito whined and Takato laughed.

"Looks like he's in good hands."

Asami's expressed softened ever so slightly when he looked down at his lover. "I might not deserve him but I'm not about to let him go. He is mine to look after." Takato's eyebrows shot up but Asami was still looking down at his soulmate and didn't notice his expression. "Come on kitten, time to go home."

Takato snickered at the pet name. Kou was going to love that once he found out. The group said their goodbyes and Takato watched them leave, Asami's arm wrapped Akihito's waist. They were cute. Except for that comment, especially after what Akihito mentioned earlier. He quickly sent a message off to his friend about it. He won't get it until tomorrow when he's sober and then he can decide what he wants to do with that information.

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Akihito finally decided it was time to drag himself out of bed. He had woken up a few hours ago to find himself in Asami's bed with a water bottle and some painkillers on the bedside table. He had gratefully downed them before curling back up to sleep off his hangover. Thankfully it wasn't so bad, especially since he barely remembered the later part of last night. He must have been pretty drunk but someone probably forced some water on him. He was incredibly thankful now. He was a little sore below the waist as well so Asami must have gotten his hands on him at some point last night. Presumably that was how he got to the penthouse.

He reached over to the bedside table and grabbed his phone to check the time. It was just before lunch and there was an unread message from Takato. He opened up curiously noting that it was sent last night.

Hey man, I know you won't get this until tomorrow but I thought you might want to know. I met Asami and he mentioned he 'didn't deserve you'. Hope the hangover's okay!

Akihito froze staring at his phone. He didn't deserve him? What the hell. Was this because of what happened in the past? He wasn't going to talk to Asami just yet. The message he had received from Kirishima with the date and location of the grave said he had five weeks before the anniversary of her death. But… He couldn't sit on this information. Akihito put the phone down and got up, throwing a t-shirt on before going in search of Asami. He ran into the man in the hall as he was just leaving his home office. He got a small smile once spotted.

"Good morning, how are you feeling kitten?" He stared at him, trying to see the cracks in his expression that he knew where there. Asami's brows furrowed at his lack of reply. "Akihito?"

"I… You…" He frowned before starting again slowly. "I got a message from Takato, he said that you said that you didn't deserve me." He watched as Asami's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. "Why do you think that?"

"Akihito… I'm sure you're aware by now that I'm not a nice man."

The photographer shook his head. "That's not it. You're pretty unapologetic for who you are... Except… Does this have something to do with Kirishima Haruki and Motoori Tetsuya?"

Asami's eyes flew wide at the names before they narrowed dangerously and he demanded; "Where did you hear those names?"

"I asked Kirishima-san and he told me." He watched as Asami's face suddenly closed off and became impassive. Akihito felt a wrenching in his chest at seeing the mask. "NO!" He yelled. "No! That god damn mask you put on is exactly the reason why I had to ask him. I felt it. I felt your pain that day you had the nightmare. That's why I kept asking about it." Asami continued to stare at him impassively, not moving a muscle. It hurt. Seeing that mask in place hurt Akihito so much. "But every single time you shut me out. I felt that awful wrenching, tearing feeling. I shared that pain with you through our soul bond. But you kept pushing me away. So I asked and he told me what happened."

Akihito stepped forward, moving into Asami's space and the man didn't move, he seemed frozen in place. "He told me about how much you loved her and had her taken away right in front of your eyes just as you were allowed to start dreaming again. He told me that you lost your friend in a similar way. Both died in front of you, with you there and that you blamed yourself. He said he didn't blame you. No one blamed you. But you did. You blamed yourself for everything. He told me of the pain you felt and how he tried to help you heal but you never did. You forced it all the deep inside and it still sits there, buried but still as raw as when it happened nearly ten years ago. And in front of it you have that stupid mask. I hate that fucking mask. It hides everything. It hides you from me. I'm your soulmate. Don't you understand that? Of course you fucking deserve me. You're not the one who decides that. That got decided the day we found each other."

Akihito moved forward again and took Asami's collar in his fists, wrenching them even closer. "I'm your soulmate. Don't shut me out. I want to help you. I want to help you heal. That mask covers your pain but to do so it covers your heart and soul. I can't see them. I want to see all of you. You're mine as much as I am yours. I felt that pain. I can't let you suffer like that. Just let me in. Let me share your pain. You're not alone anymore." Akihito could feel the lump forming in his throat that had started to threaten before but he ploughed on undeterred. "I'm not asking for anything in return. That's not how it works. I just… I just…" His breathing hitched and he choked on a sob. Tears blurred his vision and he could feel them starting to pour down his cheeks already. He took a deep breath and forced the words out.

"JUST LET ME LOVE YOU!"

He watched as Asami's expression finally shifted from the impassive mask into shock. Akihito's whole body started to shake with the force of his sobs. The pain in his chest morphed into a tight feeling and he suddenly found it hard to breathe. He saw a light out of corner of his blurred vision and looked down. Their chests were lit up with the pulsing glow that signified the soulmate bond. He hadn't seen it since the day they met. He looked back up in time to see the mask shatter. He could finally see all the pain, grief and guilt on Asami's face. Akihito released his grip on Asami's collar and stumbled the last bit of distance to wrap his arms around his soulmate and bury his face into the junction of his neck. He squeezed him tightly and whispered again.

"Just let me love you."

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Asami wasn't sure how long they stood there and held each other tightly. Finally Akihito's sobs subsided and he pulled away. He took Asami's hand in his own, lacing their fingers together and without a word, led him into the bedroom. Asami let himself be led without protest. He pulled him onto the bed and only dropped his hand once he was lying down. Akihito went and closed the door as well as the curtains before climbing onto the bed. He lay down in front of the older man and pulled him in close so that his head was resting on his arm and his face against his chest. His arms wrapped around his shoulders and a small hand began to slowly stroke through his dark hair. Akihito didn't say a word. Asami took a breath and turned his head to better hear the soft heartbeat of his soulmate. While Akihito didn't say it out loud, he remembered the words that had been said to him last time they laid like this.

Focus on my heartbeat, remember that it beats for you and think only of that.

They laid there for a long time before Asami finally spoke. Slowly but surely he began to talk of his life. He started from the beginning. His family life, his parents. How they were murdered when he was seventeen and his extended family took their inheritance and just left him to fend for himself. How he wielded the money he inherited to start off in the underground. How it quickly grew and he started to grow in power and wealth while still so young. He talked about going to university and meeting Kei. How he met Haruki. All the buried memories that he had tried desperately to forget came bubbling up to the surface. He talked about her, the things she liked, the things they did. What she looked like. What their dreams and plans had been. While his voice remained quiet and even, tears welled up and spilled over, soaking Akihito's T-shirt but if he noticed, he didn't comment. He just continued to gently stroke his fingers through his hair in a soothing gesture.

Asami spoke about the day she died. The vivid details he could remember in such sharp clarity even though everything else was blurred with time. The sounds, the blood, the pain and the crippling guilt. He spoke about the pain of the next year, the holes in his memory from the illicit substances and the nightmares. How it felt like a living nightmare. How he threw himself into the underworld as though in some form of spite of his broken dreams. Then the pain of losing one of his closest friends. How he bled out in his arms while they drove to the hospital. The grief and guilt he felt over the death. Married just over six months and now his wife was left alone. He spoke about how broken he felt. His time living with Kirishima. His time living as a hollow shell of a man. How he walked through everyday just pretending to be whole with a mask in place to hide the broken pieces of himself. He spoke about Sion and its rise to power and prestige through both legitimate and illegitimate means. How Suoh was hired to replace Tetsuya and how that killed him a little inside for a start.

He spoke about his feelings since meeting Akihito. The surprise and confusion initially. The pain when he went missing from his guards and wouldn't answer his calls. His panic when it felt like he might lose another person. The fear and anger over the almost incident that evening. How badly the woman was effected by the drug and how that was nearly Akihito.

He talked and let it all out. Bit by bit he shared his pain. Until finally his words came to a stop and he lay there feeling hollow as though he had not just shared the pain but given it over to Akihito. It felt like he was left with a carved out hollow where he previously carried that pain around. Exhausted, Asami closed his eyes and focused on the steadily beating heart that had kept him grounded throughout his outpouring of grief and pain. He focused on the sound and let it wash over him. Maybe, just maybe, that heartbeat would be enough to fill the empty space.