6
Chapter 12
While other the other cadets had free time to socialize…or just relax, Dickie wondered over to the library.
Dickie fought through the hordes of bodies…pushing past girls chatting about guys and boys discussing their grades. He accidentally found himself in the middle of a discussion on fingernail polish between three girls…and simply hunched down and pushed through.
"Oh my god…excuse you!"
"Sorry," he mumbled weakly.
He wandered down the corridor…and slipped into the library.
He silenced his breath…and almost tiptoed to the nearest table and chair.
He took a seat…pulling out his history textbook.
He made quick work of it; he finished his reading in five minutes.
Feeling confident…he moved onto to philosophy.
He'd finished the Plato's dialogue in twenty minutes.
With a cocky grin on his face…he flew through his examinations of the Vulcan biological diagrams.
And the combat strategies of George Patton.
Flying high and feeling good…he pulled out his calculus textbook.
He stopped for a moment…remembering his painful bouts with mathematics in the past.
He didn't want to break his roll.
After a few minutes of anxious procrastination…he slowly opened the book.
On the first problem…he read it slowly.
After careful thought…he solved it.
Phew!
The second problem…took a little longer.
But he got it.
"This isn't so bad," he thought to himself.
Third problem…was not so easy.
Dickie sat there for five minutes…reading the problem over and over again.
In frustration…he let out a small grunt.
The librarian glared at him.
Dickie nervously acknowledged him.
He scribbled something down on his padd and moved on.
Problem number 4: Dickie sat there for ten minutes…unable to comprehend it.
"Ergh!"
"Shush!"
Dickie faked it again.
At this point…he'd lost all of his confidence.
He was afraid to try and work number five.
He closed the book and set down on the table for a while.
He sat there staring at him…almost wishing it would just disappear.
After about a half hour…he reluctantly re-opened it.
He read the sentence. Over and over again. His eyes burned holes in the page…but his mind just could not comprehend.
His hands started shaking…tears started to well up in his eyes.
"No! I can't!"
"Cadet," shouted the librarian. "You will be quiet…or you will leave!"
Dickie stared at the page…his face red and his eyes gushing tears.
He threw the book across the room…knocking over a shelf.
"God Dammit!"
The librarian jumped to his feet and was upon him in seconds.
"Out! Now!"
Dickie sat there sobbing…looking into the face of the librarian.
"I couldn't get the problem," he uttered weakly.
The librarian's eyes were saucers.
"Cadet. You…uhmm…"
Dickie grabbed his pile of books into his arms. He slowly retrieved the calculus textbook…and left humiliated.
Dickie was alone in his dorm when he caught up to him.
He heard the door being buzzed...but felt no encouragement to answer it.
He face was still red; his eyes were puffy.
After letting it ring for a moment…he reluctantly dragged his feet to the door and answered it.
It was the Lieutenant. His face was more crusty than usual.
"Cadet," he grunted.
Dickie looked him up and down; he plastered his face to look tough. But his eyes gave away his shame and anxiety.
"Yes, sir," he muttered.
The Lieutenant peered through him with an irritated and expecting look.
"Are you…going to let me in, Cadet?" he growled.
Dickie stepped out of the way; the door swooshed behind the old man.
The lieutenant shot a fiery glare at Dickie.
"What in the hell? What in God's name is wrong with you, Cadet?!"
Dickie was silent. He postured to look imposing.
"Huh? Throwing around books in the library like some god damn five-year old!? Do you have anything to say for yourself!?"
"No, sir,"
"And bawling your eyes out over some stupid book? I'm ashamed to have you in my outfit!"
"I didn't do that, sir," he lied.
The Lieutenant stepped an inch from Dickie's face.
"Come again, Cadet?" he snarled.
"I said I didn't cry, sir,"
"Lying to a superior officer is a serious offense, Mr. Stern. I have a witness who said you did otherwise,"
Dickie said nothing. He glanced around the room to avoid eye contact.
"That's what I thought. Mr. Stern…if I hear of you or see you doing anything like this again. I'll make sure you never serve in Starfleet until the day you die!"
"Yes, sir," Dickie muttered.
The Lieutenant stood there for a moment…staring him down.
Dickie accidentally glanced into his eyes…and the Lieutenant could see right through his façade. He could see the fear in his eyes.
"You don't belong here, Mr. Stern. Starfleet isn't for maggots like you!"
Dickie bit his tongue and gritted his teeth. His arms and legs started shaking from the rage that filled his body.
After the Lieutenant had left…he tore his room apart.