I'm sure you know about the glitch in the reviews over the last week. If i wasn't able to contact you directly, THANK YOU for leaving me a review. I always appreciate them and love knowing you are here and reading. I know I'm pushing the limits of the characters here, but it's an AU. ;)

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Chapter 2: How Did It Come to This?

She dimmed the lights to half power and tapped the controls for the sonics. She stepped into the small sonic stall. Once inside, she noticed the controls for water and felt supremely grateful for them when they actually worked. She let the water stream over her head taking her tears with it until slowly her hands came up to cover her face as her head hung down.

How did it come to this?

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As he gathered his undershorts off the floor, he heard the water running in the shower. Walking over to his travel bag sitting atop the cabinet to pull out a fresh pair, he swore he heard her crying. Walking closer to the door of the fresher, he clearly heard her sobs. He had never seen her cry. Never. His heart broke and his stomach wrenched. He wanted to go in there, hold her and kiss her tears away. He shook his head in frustration as he snapped the bag shut.

Why wouldn't she let him love her? Their attraction and passion were undeniable. It was as if it built up in between missions to an exploding crescendo of sex at times like these. There was so much more there between them, but she refused to allow it.

He never knew why. Maybe it was a case of too much loss in her life already and she feared more. Maybe it was a fear of divided loyalties to the Rebellion. Maybe she feared losing control of the tight grip she kept on her life. Maybe.

Or maybe it was as he initially believed when they first met: she didn't think a guy like him belonged with a princess like her.

Sure, he was good enough to 'fuck' her in the dark when away on missions alone. Good enough to use him to satisfy her deeply hidden desire for lustful, raw sex. Before and after? There was zero acknowledgment from her that the act or any contact at all ever happened.

In the beginning, there wasn't any sex of any sort. There was plenty of fighting and flirting well before there ever was fucking. At one point away on a mission, the flirting had overtaken the fighting. He remembered clearly his surprise at her increasingly playful responses to his leering teasing. In fact, the more subtle he made the overtures, the more overly flirtatious she became.

Falling for her attentions, his sense of romance took over and his heart opened up believing she finally felt the same. The last night of that mission was where it took the fateful turn from heartfelt emotions to pure unadulterated lust.

After a romantic dinner to celebrate a successful mission, they had found themselves back in their hotel room standing very close. He had moved to kiss her gently.

"Leia…" he had whispered as if in prayer, drawn in by her intense eyes.

She had refused his kiss instead had slid her hands down from his chest to release his blaster rig and rip open his trousers to grip his immediately hard cock. His surprise was overshadowed by her aggressiveness. He remembered her unfastening his shirt and kissing her way down his chest as she dropped to her knees and took him into her mouth. Although she was an obvious novice, he came hard and fast that time just like all the times since. Her punishing beauty and assertiveness had always been incredibly arousing to him.

Later that same night, he had been ready for round two. He tried several times to kiss her, but she distracted him. He remembered kissing every bit of her body and how he made her quiver with desire, but she refused his lips on hers.

He didn't know what it was about, but didn't let it bother him until the next morning when she rejected all of his advances and acted as if nothing happened between them. Things just eventually went back to their usual way of going about day-to-day leaving him confused and hurt.

He observed her more closely than ever then. Looking for answers she wouldn't give him. He found several plausible ones he was willing to believe to ease his hurt. Then came another mission alone.

Again, that very last night he found himself pounding deep inside of her while holding her up against a wall half-clothed because they couldn't wait long enough to take them all off. Then another round with her furiously riding him while she described to him in explicit detail what she wanted him to do to her.

The next day was a repeat of the refusal to acknowledge any intimacy had even occurred. After that, he didn't know what to do. He tried to leave, but found he couldn't bring himself to leave her. He wanted more and believed he just needed to break through her defenses. She had to feel the same as he did. There was no way they could share such an incredible force of passion for each other and have there be nothing else underneath. It was just not possible.

He pushed and teased and cajoled her. He argued and debated and they continued to have a difficult relationship. When they found themselves on missions where they were in a bedroom alone late at night, he started taking advantage of her secret sexuality with him. He decided if he were going to be used for her pleasure, he was going to do some using himself and take over the dominating position. Interestingly, the sex was hotter than ever before with Leia enjoying her submissive role as long as he kept his mouth away from hers.

They were coming up on three years of knowing each other and just over two years of their strange sexual relationship. He knew her now. Really knew her. At least, he thought he did. Yet, there was a big part of her that she kept hidden and nobody was allowed near it as far as he could tell.