6 Grey

I don't know if I can put on a list all the things that happened in the last days. So, let's start by the most important.

Beth woke up, she was getting better and for a moment I thought that everything was going into the right way again. But, she got depressed. And I mean, really depressed. I have dealt with this kind of situation before and I knew that we needed to keep our eyes on her. Maggie had argued with her when Beth started saying that she didn't wanted to live anymore. I think she needs to let it hurt, Beth needed to feel the pain inside burning in her chest like the world is ending. Well, the world had ended long ago in many ways, but we're still here, we can make it better again, can we right?

- You know I can talk to her — I was outside checking on the Jeep when Effy came up to me and told me that.

- I don't think is a good idea — I replied and turned around.

- Mary, I know how she feels. And I want to help her.

- She has to mourn her mother and brother.

- You know is not that easy - She said. I walked at the other side of the car and she followed me, I was trying to avoid the conversation.

- We are watching over her, making sure she's okay. And otherwise she's just seventeen, she's young and we have to give her some time.

- I was seventeen too, remember?

Effy never talked about it, not even after it happened. I stopped there, unmoving. I didn't want to remember, but all the images came to my mind in a second. I can see it all again even with my eyes open. I'm in home is Saturday night, I know my parents aren't there, I feel the distinct smell of weed and smoke, I run upstairs opening every door and then I find her, there's blood and a kitchen knife, there's my sister lying on the bathroom floor.

- She's not gonna do that.

- I'll talk to Beth, right now she needs a friend — and she walked away to the house again.

I was making my way to the same path my sister had walked a few minutes ago when I heard the screaming. I ran, got myself in the house in seconds and found a panicked Maggie trying to open the door of Beth's room.

- She locked it?

- She broke something maybe a glass I heard it! - Maggie said with desperation.

Not again, not here, not now.

Not Beth.

I took my shotgun and hit the pommel with the barrel, I made a mess breaking the thing but the door was still closed. Maggie was pushing against it with her arm and I made her step back.

Taking a step I took impulse and kicked the door off, finally opening it.

- Bloody hell — I hissed, feeling my lower leg hurting.

Beth had tried to cut her wrists with a mirror glass she broke by herself. But she felt bad while doing it and stopped, she just couldn't.

So, that was the most important thing that happened these days, at least for me. On the other hand, when Rick, Glenn and Hershel came back of town with this Randall guy I knew it wasn't going to be good. First they talked in the house about what to do with him, they told us the fight that took place in the bar and seems like the other guys were dangerous. They debated it for a while and finally Rick decided to give the guy some supplies and put him on the road.

And they did it.

No, they didn't, Rick and Shane came back with Randall tied again on the backseat. Curious thing is that they both were bruised so some kind of fight had happened. Sometimes I wondered what on earth wrong whit the group was. They locked up the guy on a shed, and honestly, I didn't mind about it I know it was just a young man, maybe younger than me but he was with a group of idiots who shot at Rick, Glenn and Hershel. So I wasn't really comfortable by the idea of having him here with us.

I needed a break, too much things happening left me anxious so I just took my knives and walked, well in my own slow pace, my leg still was sore for kicking a door.

There is a really pretty spot in the farm, close to the campsite but still away of the fences. An oak is there, big and giving enough shadow to keeping the sunlight away. I took off the knives and began to sharping one.

From that spot, I could see the house, the barn and the shed, Daryl's tent on the distance and the campsite near me. I saw some kind of discussion occurring in the campsite with the group, I did not give it much attention and came back to my work. I was getting myself a little relaxed when I heard footsteps crushing on the grass. Tilting my head, I found Dale walking to me. The old man approached me with a worried face.

- Is something wrong Dale?

- Everything is wrong, Mary, they want to kill Randall — He replied looking with horror — Do you think that's right?

- I think that they shouldn't have brought him here in the first place — I said.

- You were a lawyer, Mary — He retorted looking at me.

- I got my degree and spent the following months just traveling in Europe, so I never got to be a real lawyer.

- So you think is right? Killing a young man just because they don't know what to do with him? . — He asked.

- I'll support what is better for everyone.

Dale sighed, and walked heading back to the RV.

I was almost done with the knives and ready to get back home when Daryl came up to me. He had his crossbow on his back, and was as always with sleeveless shirt and a vest, even though the cool weather. It surprised me when he stopped in front of me.

- Those are yours? — He asked glaring at my five knives.

- Yes, I carry them all the time — I confessed.

- Yer nuts — I glared at him and noticed that his knuckles were bloodied.

- What happened to your hands?

- Just had a lil' chat with our new guest — He shrugged.

- And I'm the one who's nuts? — I grinned at him standing up.

- Rick is having some debate bout the guy's fate, he want us all in the house b'fore sunset – I grunted and nodded, just like he used to.

The small debate did not get anywhere. It was a pointless discussion about something that most of them have already decided. No one wanted Randall here, he was a threat and Rick was clear about not taking any risk. I just did not want to know about it. I was there right besides Maggie and I could not be more uncomfortable. Dale was the only one reluctant about killing Randall, and then he said something about how they saved the guy and now were going to kill him because no one knew what to do with him. Well that was a point. But when Patricia asked how they were going to kill Randall, Dale freaked out even more. Everyone started discussing again and getting into point one over and over again.

- You once said that we don't kill the living – Dale said looking at Rick.

- Well, that was before the living tried to kill us.

- But don't you see? If we do this, the people that we were... The world that we knew is dead. And this new world is ugly. It's harsh. It's survival of the fittest. And that's a world I don't want to live in, and I don't believe that any of you do.

I didn't want to talk but I had to, I was just getting tired of this whole Randall thing and then Carol started saying she doesn't wanted to be part of the discussion.

- I'm sick of everybody arguing and fighting – Carol said annoyed – I didn't ask for this. You can't ask us to decide something like this. Decide either of you, both of you, but leave me out.

- Leave me out too – I spoke starting to leave the room.

- Not speaking out or killing him yourself, there's no difference Mary – Dale said behind me. I turned around and glared at him.

- That's better than get attacked by those psychos – I replied – There are women and girls here. I'm sorry but I can't feel safe thinking everyday that something like that could possibly happen.

There was silence for a moment, maybe they were thinking about it or maybe they were just sick of this whole controversy.

- Please – Dale started again – Let's just do what's right. Isn't there anybody else who's gonna stand with me?

- He's right – Andrea stood up – We should try to find another way.

I could not help but snort and turn my eyes from them. Heading to the door I didn't get too far, someone grabbed me by the wrist with a strong hand.

- Don't be a brat - Daryl whispered at me without leaving my hand.

A brat? This stupid country man was far way wrong about me. Hearing him calling me a brat only pissed me off even more, I freed my wrist from his hold and I stormed out of there.

They were supposed to get rid of the guy at midnight. And again they didn't. I don't know what was happening exactly but I heard some shouting from the outside. I was about to sleep and looking out the window I saw some kind of another arguing between Rick and Shane and now Carl was over there too. Taking my black leather jacket I put on my boots again and walked outside.

- What's going on? — No one got to answered when a scream broke the short stillness of the night.

Rick and the others were running, and when I got there I saw it. Really close to the fences what we found was a horrid vision I don't really want to talk about. Dale had been attacked by a walker, blood covering the old man's body while he looked at us in shock and desperation. A child cry startled me Sophia was just behind me glaring with horror to the scene in front of us. I took her in my arms and turned around blocking her sight; the girl was sobbing uncontrollably and shaking against my chest.

- Don't look honey, don't look - I whispered to her.

From the corner of my eye I could see Hershel shooking his head at Rick. When I heard Andrea crying that he was suffering I knew it was over.

The pressure in my chest was making its way to me, and everything around me felt buzzed and twisted. My heart was pounding inside me like a crazy horse running through my veins. Sophia kept still in my hold at least she wasn't looking or shaking anymore, I didn't look back either. Daryl's raspy voice sounded like a frozen breeze.

- I'm sorry brother.

When I heard the gunshot, I felt the panic has already taken me.

Season 2 almost over.

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