Makes him Forget
"Shh! You're going to wake my dad up!" Iris whispered frantically at him. Barry laughed quietly as they tip toed down the stairs.
When they both reached the front door, she let Barry work his magic with the alarm system, hacking into the key pad by the door. He only had five attempts at it or the alarms would go off. Iris grinned and shook her head at him when the light turned green and the alarm was deactivated instantly.
"How did you do that?" she asked him as they closed the front door quietly behind them.
"All these security systems work in virtually the same way, just with different software," he explained, "They all fail to encrypt or authenticate the signals being sent from sensors to control panels, making it easy to intercept the data, decipher the commands, and play them back to control panels at will."
"Okay, maybe I didn't want to know," Iris laughed, everything he had just said going way over her head, "So do you have the code now then?"
"It's 2452," Barry said, his voice slightly smug. She gave him a half hug as they walked down the sidewalk together.
"I could kiss you, Barry Allen," she said warmly with a laugh.
Barry was glad that it was too dark for her to see him blush at that as they made their way down the street. She walked close to him, shivering against the cold December air, even though there was no snow on the ground. Thankfully, Jake Preston's house wasn't far from theirs, so it wasn't a very long walk.
When they reached the house it was already late, so the party was already in full swing. Iris found her friends quickly, and Barry made his way through the packed living room to reach the kitchen.
"Allen, you made it!" Jake Preston yelled when Barry walked into the kitchen.
"Hey, Jake," Barry said to the junior with a smile, "Is Matt here yet?"
"Yeah, he's outside by the pool," Jake answered, pressing a full red plastic cup into Barry hand.
"Here, have a beer," he said laughing, "You look like you could really use one."
"Thanks," Barry said gratefully, taking a long drink from the cup.
Just the taste of cold beer was enough to lift his mood, at least for a little bit. For a little while, he could forget.
He found Matt outside, chatting up some girl who was way out of his league if he was being honest. Barry laughed to himself at his friend's antics. After the girl walked away, Barry went up to him, clapping him on the back.
"Well, it's her loss," Barry said with a laugh.
Matt grinned at him.
"It was worth a shot," he said with a shrug, "Now it's your turn."
"I'm good," Barry said.
His friend, Matt, was always trying to get him to try to pick up girls and be his wing man. Barry just wanted to relax and have fun though.
"Come on, Bar," Matt groaned, "Humor me just this once. With that face and that Disney prince hair of yours, you're bound to have more luck than me."
Barry just shook his head with a laugh.
"I'm not really in the mood, Matt," he said, taking a sip of his beer, "I just want to hang out tonight and relax."
"Becky Cooper is staring at you," Matt said with a smirk, nudging Barry's shoulder and nodding in the direction he was looking.
Barry looked over and sure enough, from across the pool, Becky was looking at him with a small smile on her lips. She looked away when their eyes met, and she turned back to her friends, giggling and saying something to them that Barry couldn't hear.
"Becky and I are just friends," Barry said.
Matt rolled his eyes.
"Come on, man," he said, "We both know you like her more than you let on. She's smokin' hot, and she's totally into you. So what's stopping you?"
Barry looked down, taking a sip of his drink to avoid answering. Matt didn't need him to though. He already knew.
"It's Iris, isn't it?" he asked.
Barry still didn't look at him.
"Come on, man," he groaned, "When are you going to let that go already?"
"I don't want to talk about this, Matt," Barry said firmly.
He drained the rest of his beer.
"I'm going to go grab another one," he said, holding up his empty cup, and then he walked away to make his way over to the keg.
As Barry walked through the party some people here and there smiled and said hi to him. He nodded politely and smiled back at them. Others, however, stared at him as he walked by. In his experience, most people who took the time to actually talk to Barry and get to know him ended up really liking him. Once they gave him a chance, they realized that he was just a normal guy like the rest of them.
People who didn't know him, however, couldn't help but whisper and stare at him when they thought he wasn't looking. To them, Barry was that weird kid whose dad went nuts and killed his mother. For all they knew, Barry was just as crazy as his father. He was kind of odd with all of his science talk all the time, and there were rumors that he believed some mysterious lightning man had really killed his mother. The kid was nuts. You could tell just by looking at him. And he was freakishly smart. Everyone knows that geniuses have just a little bit of crazy in them.
Barry usually just ignored the stares and the whispers. He didn't let it bother him for the most part. If they wanted to believe that he was some whack job without even really getting to know him first, then he didn't care what they thought anyways. Their opinions didn't matter to him. All that mattered were the opinions of his friends and family.
Some days, however, the stares bothered him more than others. He found his fists clenching as he walked when he could see a few peoples' heads turning to look at him. It was probably just in his head. They probably weren't even staring, but he didn't care. He was sick of people looking at him. He was sick of them judging him and jumping to conclusions about him before even meeting him. People in high school were so naïve and ready to believe any ridiculous rumor they heard.
As Barry reached the keg, he realized he was scowling. The expression on his face wasn't at all appropriate for a party. He was still feeling on edge after the long week he had had, and he was ready to just let it go. He just wanted to forget about it. He wanted to feel better. Really, he was thankful towards Matt for pushing him to go out. This might be exactly what he needed after the hellish week he had. Matt was probably right about the whole Iris thing too if Barry was being honest with himself. He knew there was no way she would ever feel the same way about him, and he should really just let her go. He should find someone new to be crazy about, someone who makes him happy. Someone who makes him forget.
After filling his cup, Barry was about to set the keg tap down when an empty cup was suddenly held out in front of him. As he took the plastic cup from the person to fill it for them, he looked up at the owner of the cup. His lips stretched into a wide grin when he saw her standing there, that same flirty smile from before still on her lips as she looked at him.
Becky Cooper.
…..
Iris was glad that Barry had changed his mind about going out tonight, but she was still worried about him. He seemed to be slightly better after having taken a nap, but Iris could tell that he still had a heavy mind. She hoped a night out would be good for him and wouldn't somehow make things worse.
She tried to keep an eye on him over the course of the evening, but she also was distracted by her friends and everyone else there. One girl seemed to keep grabbing her attention throughout the night. Becky Cooper. Iris didn't like the way she kept looking at Barry. She didn't trust the girl around her best friend.
"Hey, you're Iris, right?" Becky asked her, approaching her in the kitchen, "You're Barry's sister?"
"I'm not his sister," Iris corrected immediately, "I'm his best friend."
"Oh," Becky said, "But you live with him, right?"
"Yeah," Iris said slowly, wondering what this girl could possibly want.
"I was just wondering," Becky said with a giggle, "Is he dating anyone? He's single, right?"
Iris looked at her, measuring her up. There was a hungry, almost malicious look in the girl's eyes, but Iris was being silly, seeing things that weren't there. She was just being overprotective of her best friend.
"Yeah, he's single," Iris answered reluctantly.
"That's all I needed to know," Becky said in a satisfied voice, "He's still here, right? I saw him earlier by the pool, but I'm not sure where he went."
"I haven't seen him," Iris replied stiffly.
It wasn't exactly true. Iris had just seen Barry heading for the keg a minute ago.
"Oh, never mind," Becky said suddenly, looking across the room, "I see him. Thanks, Iris."
With that, the girl walked away, leaving Iris to glare after her. Iris felt her stomach churn when she saw Becky approach Barry by the keg. She blamed it on the drinking though since really there was no reason for her to be upset that a girl was interested in her best friend. Barry was amazing. Of course someone would be interested in him.
Still, Iris found herself seething for some reason when she saw the grin Barry flashed at Becky as he filled her cup for her and Becky ran a hand along his shoulder.
Iris tried to ignore them. It really wasn't any of her business anyways. As long as Barry was okay and wasn't getting too drunk, she would give him his space. She tried to stay with her friends for the remainder of the night. At one point, a few hours later she walked into the packed living room where everyone was dancing to Run It by Chris Brown. There, she found Becky dancing with Barry. Or on Barry was more like it. She seemed pretty tipsy, and Iris thought she was brushing up against Barry a little too much, not that Barry seemed to mind. He was dancing with Becky with a stupid, boyish grin on his face. She tried to stay clear of the living room after that.
Iris paced herself with her drinks this time. Last time, Barry nearly had to carry her home, and she had never been more embarrassed. She was just thankful that her father had been out of town that night because there was no way they would have been able to sneak back in without him busting them with the way she had been stumbling around and giggling.
Barry, it appeared, was not pacing his drinks at all. It was like he was trying to drink himself into oblivion, which was something Iris had never seen Barry do before. It just wasn't really like him. When Iris next saw him way later in the evening, he was more than a little tipsy. It wasn't his drunkenness that bothered her though. It was the fact that he was lip locked with Becky sitting on the couch in the living room. Becky looked like she was practically trying to climb into his lap as they were sucking face like they were the only people in the room. Iris blushed indignantly when she saw where Becky's hand was placed on Barry's thigh.
"Barry, are you ready to go soon?" Iris asked loudly over the music that was still playing—Maneater was coincidentally playing in the background.
The couple broke apart, and both of them looked blearily up at her.
"Heeeey, Iris," Barry slurred, his mouth stretching into a wide grin, "I's still earrly. Aren't chu 'aving fun?"
"It's after one, Bar," Iris told him, "We should probably get going."
"You don't have to leave yet, Barrry," Becky whined, rubbing her hand gently up and down his chest and shooting an impatient glare at Iris, "You should staaay a little longer…"
Barry gave her an apologetic smile.
"No, Iris s'right," he mumbled, "I should get going."
With a hand from Iris, Barry stood up from the couch. Becky looked disappointed, but she didn't argue.
"G'night, Becky," Barry slurred, smiling at her.
"See you around, Barry," she answered with a confident smile. To Iris, the girl looked somewhat smug.
Barry let Iris steer him out of the house. She was actually surprised by how well he was able to walk on his own.
"Barry, I don't think I've ever seen you this drunk before," she muttered as they made their way down the sidewalk towards their street.
"'m good," he slurred.
"Barry, you're not good," she said as they turned onto their street and Barry stumbled slightly. She steadied him as he got his bearings.
"I can prove it," he said smugly, "Wha d'you want me t' do? I can recite the periodic table or…"
"Ugh, Barry, please don't," Iris said, laughing at his dorkiness.
She would never admit it out loud, but Barry was quite adorable when he was drunk.
"Hey, Iris," he said suddenly with a giggle, "Wanna hear a joke?"
"Sure," she said in an amused voice.
"Wha's the fastest way to det-determine the sex of a chromosome?" he asked with a grin on his face, "Pull down its genes."
"Oh my god, Barry," Iris said with a cringe and a laugh, "You always tell the corniest science jokes."
"It's not my fault all the goood ones Argon," he said with a giggle, "Get it, Iris? Argon?"
"Oh jeez," Iris said, laughing.
"D'you wanna hear a potassium joke?" he asked her goofily.
"No, Barry," Iris said with an amused sigh.
"K," he said, and then stared at her with a goofy grin on his face, waiting for her to get it.
"Oh my god," she said, after a moment, smacking him lightly on the arm for being the world's cutest dork.
He laughed hysterically, like it was the funniest thing it the world. Iris laughed right along with him, thinking to herself how good it was to hear him laugh, really laugh, like this, even if it was only because he was drunk.
"Wait," Barry said suddenly, halting where he stood on the sidewalk, "Wha' street are we on?"
"We're on our street," Iris said, impatiently pulling on his arm to get him to start walking again.
"Are we on Adams?" Barry asked her shakily.
He suddenly didn't sound drunk and happy any more. He sounded scared.
"No, Barry," she said quickly, "I just said, we're on our street. We're almost home."
"Are you sure?" Barry asked, looking around the residential street nervously.
"Yes, Barry, I know where we…are."
Oh, shit. He was right. This wasn't their street. They were on Adams Street. Iris must have been tipsier than she originally thought. She hadn't even realized it when they had turned onto the wrong street.
"Barry…I—"
"That's my house," Barry whispered, staring over her shoulder.
Iris turned to look at the house behind her. It looked just like she remembered it when she and Barry were kids and she used to go over for play dates. Barry's eyes were wide and watery as he stared at his old childhood home, not quite believing it was really there, right in front of him after all these years.
"Iris, we have to go," he said seriously, still staring at the house with watery eyes, "I can't be here."
Iris nodded and they quickly turned around. She led them to the correct street, being more careful as she looked at the street signs to make sure they went the right way. She couldn't believe that Barry had recognized Adams Street so easily considering how drunk he was. That's how emblazoned the place was in his mind though. He had noticed the street they were on before she even did.
Barry was silent for the rest of the walk home, apart from the occasional sniffle here and there. Iris thought she may have even saw a tear on his cheek, but she wasn't sure. He was completely different from the happy, drunk goofball he had been when they first left the party.
"Barry, I'm so sorry about that," she apologized when they were almost to their house.
"'s fine," he said quietly.
He didn't say anything else as they clamored up the porch steps of their house.
Iris entered in the code Barry had told her, and opened the door silently. She tried to get him up the stairs as quietly as possible so they wouldn't wake her dad, but Barry bumped into the wall, and Iris cringed at the loud thump it made.
"Come on, Barry," she whispered gently, leading him to his room.
She helped him take his shoes off and made him drink some water before laying down.
"Thanks," he mumbled, as he pulled the covers up over his still fully dressed body.
"No problem, Bar," she said quietly.
As she turned around to leave the room, she was stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the figure in the doorway. Her father was standing there, arms crossed as he stared her down.
"Hi, dad," she said sheepishly after he didn't say anything.
He continued to stare at her disapprovingly for another moment or two before speaking.
"We'll talk about this in the morning," he said flatly.
And then without another word, he turned and went back to his own room.
Shit, Iris thought. He's going to be so pissed.
With a feeling of daunting apprehension weighing over her, Iris made her way back to her own bedroom. She was definitely not looking forward to tomorrow morning. Her father's wrath was going to be worse than the hangover.
…..
Breakfast was awkward, to say the least. Joe was shooting daggers with his eyes at both of his children. He had already given them an earful about last night's events when they first woke up, and he was still seething in the aftermath.
Barry kept his head down, pushing the food around on his plate while his stomach churned and he tried to ignore Joe's glare. His whole body felt weak and shaky from the night before. Being hungover was the worst feeling, especially when you had your angry foster father shooting dirty looks at you as he thought about what your punishment would be.
"Barry, you're going to clean out the gutters today," Joe said firmly, "All of them."
Barry nodded silently, still not looking him in the eyes as he accepted his punishment without arguing.
"Iris," he continued, "You get to scrub the floors in the kitchen, laundry room and bathroom."
"What?!" Iris said incredulously, not accepting her punishment as willingly, "Dad, that will take all day!"
"Well, maybe you should have thought about that before sneaking out last night and bringing Barry back completely smashed," he said sternly.
"Joe," Barry said in a pleading voice, "It wasn't Iris's fault. I convinced her to go out. I hacked into your security system to disarm it, and I'm the one who drank too much. You don't have to punish her too."
Really, going out had originally been her idea. Matt was just the one who had made his mind up for him. The rest of it was true though, and Barry felt terrible that Iris was being punished along with him. It was all his fault they got caught in the first place. Joe had noticed they were gone because he had gone by Barry's room to check on him and make sure he wasn't having any nightmares. If it weren't for him and all his night terrors all the time, they probably would have gotten away with it.
"Iris is just as guilty here as you are, Barry," Joe said firmly, "And you two can expect to spend the rest of the weekend at home. You're both grounded now."
"What!?" Iris practically yelled, "Dad, come on! We're both sixteen!"
"Joe," Barry said seriously, "It's Saturday."
"I don't care. You two aren't leaving this house this weekend or the next," Joe said firmly.
"Joe," Barry said again with pleading eyes, "It's Saturday. Please. He's expecting me. What's he going to think if I just don't show up?"
"Bar, you know how I feel about that," Joe said sternly, "I still have my reservations about you going to see him at all. I'm sorry that you can't see your dad today, but the space might be a good thing for you two anyways."
"Please, Joe," Barry begged, "I really need to see him today. I've been waiting all week to see him. I need to, Joe. I need my dad."
Joe tried not to let these words hurt him. He tried not to let them make him feel like he wasn't enough. Of course Barry wanted to see his dad. They had a bond between the two of them that Joe could never replace, and Joe tried hard not to be upset by that fact. He really did.
"Sorry, Bar," he said, not budging.
For some reason, he couldn't look Barry in the eye, and instead he looked down at the table. He heard Barry roughly slide his chair back and stand. Barry didn't look at his foster father again as he stormed out of the room.
The kitchen was silent for a few moments after Barry's heated departure.
"Go on," Joe said to his daughter, "You can say it."
"That was a low blow, dad," Iris said huffily before she too left the kitchen.
Joe sighed and put his head in his hands. These kids were going to be the death of him.
…..
Barry worked hard and fast to get the gutters cleaned out. It was dirty and tedious work, but he tried to get it over with as fast as possible despite how shitty he was feeling from his hangover. Iris, however, was dragging her chores out, taking her time as she slowly and reluctantly scrubbed the kitchen floor.
When Barry was done with the gutters, he immediately went to help Iris with the floors, still feeling guilty for getting them caught. She assured him that it wasn't his fault, but he knew the truth. It was entirely his fault. He had fucked up bad last night. Overall, it wasn't the best night out ever.
He felt stupid for getting so wasted. It wasn't something he normally did. He knew why it happened though. He had wanted to numb himself. He had wanted to feel better and just forget everything for a night, so he drank. He drank and drank until he forgot. He had never used alcohol to cope before, so really the thought scared him. He vowed to himself never to use it for that purpose again. It would only lead to more problems for him if he made a habit out of getting shitfaced every time his nightmares and anxiety became too much for him. He was better than that.
The only good thing that seemed to come out of last night was Becky Cooper. Barry's memories of the previous night were hazy, but who could forget making out with one of the hottest girls in school? What was more was that they had finally exchanged numbers and she and Barry had now been texting each other all morning.
Iris scowled every time she looked up from her scrubbing to see Barry texting, a small smile on his face as he looked at his phone.
"I thought you said you were going to help me," she said teasingly, trying to keep her voice light.
Barry looked up from his phone to look at her.
"Right, sorry," he said, a smile still on his face from whatever text from Becky he had just read.
He flipped his phone shut and went back to work.
"So, what's going on with you and Becky?" Iris asked, trying to sound nonchalant.
Barry looked at her and shrugged.
"I don't know," he said dismissively, "We're just friends."
Iris scoffed humorlessly.
"Friends don't grope each other and exchange saliva the way you two were last night," she accused.
Barry blushed and looked back down at the floor tile he was scrubbing.
"I don't know what you want me to say, Iris," he said quietly, "She's great. She makes me feel better, and I like being around her. I don't really know what we are, but I'm happy to see where it goes."
Iris nodded. He really hadn't told her anything that she didn't already know. For some reason, she really didn't like where this whole thing was going, but if Becky made Barry happy, Iris was going to do her best to put her own feelings aside and not stand in the way of that.
"Speaking of last night…" Iris started nervously, "I'm so sorry…about the Adams Street thing."
She watched his face for changes, but it didn't waver. She noticed the brush in his hand that he was scrubbing with stopped moving for a brief moment though. It was only a slight pause, and then he resumed his work.
"It's fine, Iris," he said flatly, "It was an honest mistake."
"Are you okay?" she asked concernedly.
"I'm fine," he said immediately in an emotionless voice before looking back at the floor. The response was too quick, too automatic for her liking.
"Barry, if you need to ta—"
"I said I'm fine, Iris!" he snapped at her, surprising her a little bit with his hostility.
She gave him a hurt look that caused his own expression to soften slightly.
"I'm sorry," he said immediately, "I didn't mean to snap at you. I just…I really wanted to see my dad today, and now that I can't I'm not in the best mood."
"I'm sorry, Barry," she said gently, "I know how much it means to you to be able to visit him."
Barry just nodded. Both went back to their scrubbing in silence, Iris looking up at him every few minutes. He never talked much about his meetings with his dad. Iris had never gone with him for a visit, and he didn't ever really tell her what he and his dad talked about. It was a part of Barry's life that she was somewhat clueless about. All she knew was that every Saturday Barry made the trip to Iron Heights to visit his dad. He never told her about it, about what they said to each other or what it was like for him.
They were best friends, and they told each other everything, but Iris knew that there were parts of his life and parts of himself that he kept hidden from her. As much as she thought she knew him and how he thought and how he felt, sometimes there were moments where she felt like she didn't know him at all. It hurt her that she could never fully understand everything that Barry went through, everything that he kept hidden beneath the surface. There was this whole other side to him that was a complete mystery to her.
"I'm going to go do my homework," Barry muttered when they were finished with the floors.
"Okay," she said softly, and shortly after that Barry disappeared up the stairs.
…..
Joe spent the better part of his day somewhat at war with himself. He felt guilty. For some reason he felt guilty about the punishment he had given for Barry's and Iris's escapades last night. He didn't regret the chores he had given them; he didn't regret that part one bit. He felt bad though about grounding them. Really, the only reason he felt guilty about it was because he kept picturing the look on Barry's face when he had found out he wouldn't be able to see his dad today. He had looked so crushed.
Joe felt like it was kind of a wrong, twisted punishment, not allowing Barry to go see his own father, but that honestly hadn't been his reasoning or his intention when he had decided to ground them. Really, it hadn't even crossed his mind until Barry had brought it up. Although Joe felt bad about it, he wasn't going to change his mind. He was going to follow through with the initial punishment. He always followed through with his punishments and enforced them once he had given them.
Also, if he was being truly honest with himself, he really still wasn't sure how he felt about Barry visiting with his dad. Who knew what ideas that man was putting into Barry's head? How was Joe ever going to get Barry to accept what he really saw that night when his father was constantly telling him otherwise? Of course Barry was going to always choose to believe Henry. He would believe him because he wanted to believe in him.
With Barry's weekly visits with his father, Joe knew Barry was never really going to accept the truth of what happened the night his mother died. He would carry his childhood delusion with him into adulthood, and he would never fully recover from his trauma because of it. All of the therapists said it. Accepting what actually happened that night was the first step, and Henry was making that impossible for Barry. The man was compromising his own son's recovery, his recovery from a childhood trauma that he caused. Then again, why would he care? This was all coming from a man who had killed his own wife in front of his eleven-year-old son. What did he care if Barry recovered? At least he had someone to visit him every week and save him from the boredom of prison.
Barry had been visiting his father once a week for two years now. By the time Barry turned fourteen, it became clear that he was never going to stop trying to see his dad, and Joe finally gave in, knowing that nothing and no one, not even Joe, would ever stop him from going to see his father and talk to him. Joe froze on that thought.
Shit.
He quickly made his way into the living room, where Iris was sitting on the couch massaging her sore knees after finishing scrubbing the floors.
"Where's Barry?" he asked her urgently.
"Upstairs," she answered blankly, "Doing his homework."
"On a Saturday?" Joe asked raising an eyebrow.
"You know Barry," Iris laughed, "He's a nerd. He doesn't procrastinate till Sunday night like I do."
But Joe knew better, and he quickly made his way up the stairs and knocked on Barry's bedroom door. Not to his surprise, there was no response. Joe let out an angry sigh as he picked the lock and opened the door. Sure enough, Barry wasn't in his room, and his bedroom window was wide open. Joe made his way over to the window. There was a ladder under it. Of course. Barry had placed it there strategically after he had finished cleaning out the gutters. Damn, that boy was smart. Too smart sometimes.
…..
Just a quick reminder, this fic is taking place in 2006, which is why I mentioned those older songs during the party scene and why Barry has a flip phone. I'm probably going to be putting other 2006 elements into this story, so I just want everyone to keep that in mind.