AN: Well, this story has gone on a lot longer than I planned, but things are going more slowly than I imagined. It'll speed up after this! Thanks for reading.

EOEOEOEO

Olivia pulled her phone out of her pocket as she exited the precinct. She was still steaming over Tucker's interview and innuendo, but she really wanted to get an update on her fellow detectives talk with Amy. She really hoped that Amy remembered more of what happened last night than she had claimed.

The phone was ringing but Elliot wasn't picking up. She almost hung up but then she heard his voice.

"Liv." Elliot said. "What happened with Tucker?"

"Nothing." Olivia said, more interested in Amy at that moment. "What did Amy say?"

"Did they charge Logan with your assault?"

"Elliot." Olivia said impatiently.

Elliot sighed. "Amy's story corroborates yours. She remembers seeing Jason on the street."

"Good." Olivia said as she walked out to the street to flag a taxi.

"But unfortunately, she doesn't remember anything after that."

"Nothing?" Olivia asked, even though she had kind of been expecting it. A taxi pulled up to the curb and Olivia climbed inside. "Where are you right now?" she asked. "Are you still at the hotel with Amy?"

"No. I'm following Munch and Fin. They're taking Amy to Mercy for a physical."

"The hospital." Olivia said. It was a statement and a question. She looked up at the cabbie. "Mercy." The cabdriver nodded and pulled away.

Elliot overheard her give the name of the hospital, and knew she must have hopped her into a cab. "Liv, I think you should go home."

"Amy's going to the hospital. You really think I'm going to go home?" Olivia asked incredulously.

Elliot sighed. He hadn't been crazy enough to think she would listen to him. He certainly wouldn't abandon a friend like that and he wouldn't have expected Olivia to. But he was really worried about her concussion and the toll this was taking on her.

"Liv." He said helplessly. "I'll let you know as soon as she…"

"I'm not going home." Olivia said. She hung up the phone and stuffed it back in her pocket.

EOEOEOEOEO

Olivia found Elliot standing outside the exam rooms with Munch and Fin. She didn't waste any time before she began firing questions at them. John told her to calm down and he would fill her in, and he guided her over to the chairs in the waiting area, with Fin trailing behind them.

Elliot stayed in place, watching her with his arms crossed over his chest. He was still a little shocked each time he saw her today…the swelling and the bruises a proved to be a startling reminder of all that had happened. He could see the exhaustion on her face and he wished he could do something to make all of this go away.

Olivia listened as Fin and Munch repeated the information they'd gotten from Amy at the hotel. She asked a couple of clarifying questions, but she was frustrated by Amy's lack of recall. Fin assured her they were pulling more recent video from the hotel; there had to be some record of Amy and Jason returning to the hotel. There was no other explanation. If Amy was unconscious, there would be no way she could have re-entered the hotel under her own steam.

Elliot wandered over to where they were sitting.

"You OK?" he asked.

"Do you think he raped her?" Olivia asked.

Elliot shrugged. "I don't know. But if she was unconscious…" he shrugged again. "Well, she wouldn't have put up a fight. So unless they find some physical evidence…"

"We shouldn't have gone out." Olivia didn't want to sound like a broken record, but she couldn't help thinking it.

Elliot sat down in the chair next to her. "Jason Logan is a stalker. This is not your fault. Or Amy's fault."

"If she can't remember and Logan won't talk, we may never know what happened." Olivia said. "He could have assaulted her and she'd never know." She had a vision of Jason laying Amy down on the bed…undressing her…pretending it was consensual…taking his time with her, touching her. "Son-of-a-bitch is going to get away with it."

"We'll get him Liv." Elliot said, trying to comfort her. 'And we'll get him for his assault on you."

"There are no witnesses Elliot." Olivia said, standing up. "It's my word against his. And as you pointed out, I was drunk."

Elliot stood up to face her. "I never said you were drunk."

Olivia took a few paces away from him and then turned to face him. "The truth is, they have my blood and it shows I had been drinking. There is no proof of what happened, but with he said, she said…it comes down to character and facts. I have a violent job. I have the training and I've been involved in more than one takedown. I was drinking. And Jason Logan appears to be a fucking saint." She paced a few more steps down the hallway, turning into a small alcove, and then turned back to face Elliot. "He helped a drunk woman back to her hotel. That's what he's going to say and they're going to believe it."

Elliot followed her into the alcove. He could see tears on her lower lashes before she buried her face in her hands. He closed the gap between them and placed his hands gently on her shoulders. "He's not going to get away with it." Elliot whispered. He pulled her into his body and she offered no resistance. He wrapped his arms around her and felt her bury her head in her chest. He had never seen her this vulnerable, and he wondered briefly what it was about this event that had made her give in to it. After all the horrific things they'd seen day in and day out…of all the times she could have crumbled…the times she would have felt the need for comfort…why now? Why this? Maybe it was because this was personal. All the other times, she'd been a cop. The protector. Getting justice for the victims. But this time, she'd been out on a night out with friends. It had been a chance to let her guard down. An opportunity to put down her sword and her shield and be a normal person…one of the girls.

Elliot buried his face in her hair and tightened his arms around her. "I'm sorry. I wish I could make all of this go away." He heard Olivia mumble something into his chest, but he couldn't hear her. She didn't move, so he decided it must not be important. He swayed slightly in place, rocking her gently, and he slid his hand up and down her back.

Olivia could feel the heat of his hand through the fabric of her t-shirt. She felt warmth spread through her body. She wanted to stay wrapped in Elliot's arms forever…she felt safe here. Like nothing in the world could touch them.

Suddenly, the couldn't think of anything except the feel of his hands on her. She wanted nothing more than to escape…to sneak away from this mess and be alone with him. She put her palms flat against his chest and lifted her head from his chest. Elliot stared down at her, a question in his eyes.

"El…" She whispered. She let her eyes drop to his mouth, and then back to meet his eyes.

"Olivia?" a loud voice called out.

She had been lost in the moment, she almost gasped at the sound of her name.

"Olivia?"

She heard her name again. A little louder and a little closer.

She pushed hands against Elliot's chest and he was forced to take a few steps back. She slid around him and around the corner, into the main hallway. She saw Munch walking towards her. "What?"

"Amy's asking for you."

Olivia glanced back quickly and saw Elliot had followed her. She didn't say anything as she turned and rushed towards the exam room that held her friend.

Elliot watched her go. He wondered what she had been about to say…about to do…before Munch had called her name and broken the reverie. He knew what he had hoped for…and what he had been thinking himself. He'd had an overwhelming urge to kiss her.

He scrubbed his hands over his face. This was so fucked up. This wasn't the time for this.

And yet.

There was no denying that she was allowing herself to give in to the pull they'd felt for years. He was more than happy to comply. Because there was no doubt that she was in control of this thing between them. She always had been. He knows he would have given in to her completely, at any time. She was the one that had kept them in line. Protected his marriage. Their partnership.

He could see a different future for them now. Something he had only dare dream about before. Over the past few days, they had strayed onto a new path. One that had formerly been forbidden, and even though he thought it was impossible to go back now, he knew he had some responsibility here. To keep this from going too far while she was in the middle of this crisis.

He needed to protect her.

Elliot shook his head as he walked down the hallway. He'd like to think he could be strong, but he knew he wouldn't be able to resist her. He hadn't been able to so far…

EOEOEOEO

Olivia walked out of the exam room an hour later, and John and Elliot stood up from where they were sitting. She shook her head, not ready to field their questions. She was exhausted and emotionally drained. As soon as she reached them, she slumped into one of the chairs.

"I feel completely useless." She muttered.

"What did the doctor say?"

Olivia shook her head. "No conclusive results on whether or not she was sexually assaulted. No evidence of semen or spermicide. No trauma that would indicate rape. Her blood alcohol level was still high, but there was a very small trace of Rohypnol in her system."

"He drugged her." Munch said.

"Even though she was drunk, he wanted to make sure she wouldn't wake up." Elliot said.

Olivia pressed her lips together and nodded. She was frustrated with her inability to help her friend. She hadn't been any help when she had asked her about Jason Logan before. She'd told her to get an order of protection and never thought about it again. And now, they were here.

Elliot could tell Olivia was beating herself up again. "Liv, this isn't…"

Olivia pushed herself out of her chair. "Don't say it." She spat out, her eyes flashing in anger. "You can tell me it's not my fault, but it doesn't mean I don't feel guilty." She knew he was only trying to help, but his words weren't going to make her feel any better about this entire mess. She lowered her tone. "Amy is going to stay with Chloe." She looked at Elliot. "Can you give us a ride?"

"Sure."

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot glanced over at Olivia as he drove her home. They had been to the hotel to collect Amy's things, and then he had driven them to their friend Chloe's. Amy and Olivia had both sat in the back seat on the drive, and Olivia had her arm around Amy the entire time as Amy slumped against her. He knew Amy was still hungover, and was emotionally distraught over everything that had happened. He couldn't imagine missing an entire night of your life…and not knowing what happened to you. He certainly hoped Fin showed up with video that gave them some proof…something they could work with. Olivia had walked her up, and they had been up there for a while. When Olivia came back and slid into the passenger seat, she didn't say a word. It had been like this for the last ten minutes as they drove towards her place. He didn't know if he should say something. There was nothing he could think to say that would make any difference. He glanced over at her again, and saw her staring out the windshield.

The exhaustion she had been feeling was overwhelming her now. Olivia honestly didn't know if she had enough energy to walk up to her apartment. She had seen Elliot glancing over at her and she knew she should say something. Tell him she was OK. But she couldn't.

She thought about the feeling of his arms around her and she wanted to lose herself in that feeling again. Closing her eyes, she imagined falling into bed with Elliot…losing herself for a few hours. She had done it before with other men...when the cases got to be too much.

But this was Elliot. This was different. She couldn't do that to him. To them.

Whatever was happening between them right now had to wait.

"Liv?"

Olivia's eyes fluttered open and she felt his hand on her arm. She realized they were parked half a block down from her apartment. She must have dozed off.

"You OK?"

Olivia nodded very slightly, but she couldn't seem to move. Elliot stayed rooted in place, and she knew he wasn't sure what to do. It was silent in the car except for the slow ticking of the engine as it cooled down.

Elliot didn't know what was going on in Olivia's mind, and it was uncharted territory for him. He wasn't sure what to do right now; how he could help. A few minutes passed, and she still hadn't made any move to get out of the car. He pushed open his car door and closed it as quietly as he could, somehow not wanting to break the silence. As he walked around the front of the card to Olivia's side of the car, and he watched her as he walked. She wasn't moving…wasn't tracking his movement. She seemed lost in thought and he could see the exhaustion in her demeanor. Her skin seemed almost pale, and the bruises on her face were stark in contrast.

Olivia heard Elliot open her car door and she turned her head as he crouched down next to her on the sidewalk.

"You ready to go upstairs?" he asked quietly. He placed his hand on her thigh and pulled lightly to swing her legs out of the car. "Do you want me to carry you?"

Olivia looked at his hand on her leg as she felt her feet hit the ground, and then back up at him. "No." She reached up and wrapped her hand around the top of the door, and Elliot backed up as she pulled herself up. "I'm fine. You can go home."

"That's not going to happen."

Olivia didn't even fight him. She hadn't expected him to listen to her anyway. She started walking towards the door of her apartment building, and she heard the car door slam closed behind her. She was almost to the door when Elliot caught up with her, and they made the journey up to her apartment in silence.

Elliot hovered in the doorway once they were inside. He really had no intention of leaving, but he wasn't certain where her mind was at. He watched as she went to the cupboard and took more Tylenol, and when she turned, he saw her glance at him. Her expression unreadable.

"Maybe I should get us something to eat." Elliot suggested.

Olivia walked out of the kitchen and past him into the living room. "I'm not hungry."

"Olivia, you should…" Elliot started.

"Just stop." Olivia said, turning back to face him. She put her hands on her hips. "You've done too much already. Just go home."

Elliot considered her words, and thought about everything that had happened over the last 24 hours. "I'm not going anywhere." He said, taking a few steps so he was standing in front of her.

Olivia wanted to take a step back. Elliot was invading her personal space. It wasn't the first time over the years, but now…it seemed different. Dangerous. She had already been leaning on him too much, and it was just as she had feared. She had allowed herself to get comfortable being in his arms, and it was easier and easier to cave in each time. She craved it.

"Why is it so hard for you to accept help?" Elliot asked. He reached out and placed his hands on her upper arms, wrapping his fingers lightly around her biceps.

"It's not hard…" Olivia started, wondering how this man always read her damn mind. "I just…I can take care of myself."

"That's exactly what I'm saying Olivia. I know you can take care of yourself, but wouldn't it be nice if you could lean on someone else? Just for a little while?" Elliot said, looking back and forth between her eyes. He knew he was pushing her. That she had learned a long time ago that the only person she could entrust her emotional well-being with was herself. She was afraid to let anyone in…even him. The vulnerability she'd shown over the past day was so uncharacteristic and he knew she was probably beating herself up over it.

Olivia shrugged her arms, letting him know that he needed to let her go. "This has gone too far already." She whispered.

Elliot took a half step closer, not quite believing she'd brought it up. "What's gone too far?" he said softly, running his hands lightly down her arms until he had her hands in his. He was surprised when she didn't pull her hands away.

"This." she rasped, her voice catching in her throat. Her emotions were all over the place. She had told herself on the way up to her apartment that she was going to send Elliot home…no matter how much she wanted to throw herself in his arms. But now he was challenging her and her resolve was fading quickly.

"What?" Elliot said innocently, his eyes never leaving hers. He could see the uncertainty on her face, but he wanted to hear her say it…hear how she was interpreting the change in their relationship.

"Don't pretend…" Olivia started to say. She didn't know what Elliot was trying to pull here, but she wasn't in the mood for games. She pulled her hands from Elliot's and shook her head. "Never mind."

She turned away from Elliot and took a few steps away before she heard his voice.

"What are you afraid of?" he asked, that same soft tone in his voice.

Olivia turned around quickly. "I'm not afraid of anything." She said, pressing her lips together and glaring at him. She really wanted to tell him that she didn't need this bullshit right now, but she was just too tired to lay into him right now. "I'm not." She repeated.

"Bullshit." Elliot said a challenge in his voice.

Olivia shook her head. "Fuck off El.

Elliot didn't drop it. He couldn't. He wasn't going to let her walk away from this. Now that the conversation had started, he felt like they needed to finish it. Even if the timing sucked. "I think you're afraid of needing someone. I think you're afraid of us."

"There is no us Elliot." Olivia shot back, but even she heard the slight tremble in her voice.

"You're afraid." Elliot said, taking a step closer.

"El." Olivia whispered, and there was a pleading tone to it.

"You don't have to be afraid of me."

Olivia shook her head almost imperceptibly.

"Don't be afraid." He whispered. He could see the war she was waging in her eyes.

Olivia stood rooted in place, listening to the voice in her head telling her not to…but she ignored them. "I'm not afraid of needing someone." Olivia said, even though it was a lie. In two steps, she was next to Elliot. She put her hands on his shoulders and looked up in his eyes. "I'm not afraid of you." And then, before she could stop herself, she pushed herself up on her toes and kissed him.