Chapter 12: Phil Cipher
As Phil Cipher headed off towards Earth to battle the Crystal Gems, meanwhile, Steven, Connie, Sadie, Onion, and the gems were all watching TV, some of them eating popcorn while doing so.
"Careful, Chad. I hear that a dangerous creature is on its way…", the TV blared. Just then, an explosion nearby startled everyone as the TV continued playing. Everyone ran outside to see none other than Phil Cipher himself, brushing himself off in the distance on the beach. "Oh, man. That landing sure could've gone a lot better." He said, seemingly having not noticed the gems yet.
"What… is that thing?" Connie asked.
At this question, Peridot pulled out her scanner, and used it on Phil. "It would seem that this thing is not a gem, as my scanners aren't showing anything for gem information." Peridot replied. "Although, I am getting some information on it anyway…" she continued, then showed the screen to the others.
Garnet proceeded to read what the screen said aloud. "Well, according to the scanner; it says: 'Phil is a cunning, eccentric, insane, psychopathic, and physically irreverent demon who finds most things amusing. He's outrageous and outlandish, as well as a quick talker and thinker. Though he may come across as simply annoying, he shouldn't be underestimated; for when he is angered, he's a force to be reckoned with as he will unleash his powers on those unfortunate enough to make him angry. When accused of being insane, Phil proudly agrees with the statement.
"'Phil is a yellow, triangular creature who has a single large eye rimmed with four short black lashes on the top and bottom. He moves around mostly by floating about, and rarely actually stands on his own two feet. He has thin, black limbs, wears a small, black bow tie, and a tall, thin, black top hat that floats just above his head. The lower part of his body has a brick-like pattern of lines. When he gets mad, he turns red and his eye glows a light red. If angered enough, he will become red while his body will become more akin to that of a demon. He will have two "mouths" which have several black tongues hanging out and bright yellow, sharp teeth, and will grow four additional arms. His arms, legs, and hat will turn a bright yellow and his eye will turn black with a yellow pupil. Phil was created in a laboratory by White Diamond, and therefore is loyal to her.'"
"Uh, wow. That was pretty detailed information." Steven said. "Peridot; your scanner can get all that?"
"Apparently so." Peridot replied, just as intrigued.
"Anyway; where was I…?" Phil continued, having finished brushing the sand off of himself. "Oh, yeah! That's right." Phil turned around to face the gems as if he already knew they were there and floated over to them. "Well, well, well. Look what we have here." Phil said in his slightly echoey voice.
"Uhh, hi there…." Steven said, fairly frightened by the intimidating figure floating just a few feet from all of them.
"Who are you, some kind of midget or something? Ha-hah! Just kidding; I know who you are, Steven." Phil joked, understandably causing everyone else to freak out.
"Wh- who are you? How do you know Steven's name?!" Pearl asked, summoning her spear and getting into a battle ready stance.
"The name's Phil Cipher. And you're Pearl, aren't you?" Phil replied. "Hey, why is your friend over there named after a kind of food?" Phil asked, gesturing to Onion.
"Heh, beats me. Hey, can I eat you? You look like a Dorito." Amethyst said casually.
"…what?" Phil responded, aptly confused.
"Amethyst! This is no time to be fooling around. This thing could very well be a great danger to us all!" Pearl told Amethyst, frustrated that she could be joking around at a time like this.
"You've sure got that right." Phil replied in his much deeper voice, startling everyone. "You see, I'm here on a mission from White Diamond to shatter each and every one of you. And once you gems are out of the way, this entire planet will be under my control; and when that's finished, me and the Great Diamond Authority will go on to RULE THE UNIVERSE!" He shouted.
Suddenly, the ground began to shake as Phil raised his arms up as a large obsidian dome began to form. The obsidian dome was decorated with some windows and a few lights, and was easily at least 200 feet in diameter.
"This is bad… this is really bad…." Steven said, panicking.
"Oh, you think?!" Pearl responded, clearly also in a panic.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some gems I need to shatter. You." Phil said.