Harry ½

Summary: Sirius takes Harry away for a summer of training. They leave Britain, both for safety and so Harry can be introduced to magic elsewhere in the world. While in China, Sirius gets the bright idea to train in a place called Jusenkyo, and life for the two of them will never be the same again.

Crossover: Harry Potter/Ranma ½

Pairing: Harry/Hermione/?

A/N: I think there's a lot of potential here. I imagine it being like my Amy Potter story, both in length and in tone. One question I'd need to answer is when it would take place. Should I do fourth year again? That's probably the best context for humor with this idea — can you imagine Shampoo showing up for the first task? Cologne at the second task? And then there's the Yule Ball! However, I've also done fourth year the most, which makes it somewhat less interesting for me and that would likely be reflected in the quality of the writing. Fifth year? Umbridge might be too difficult to work around. Sixth year? That would probably be boring.

As always, thanks to Bonnie for not only reading this and improving on the original, but also for her help in developing the plot so far.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, JK Rowling does. I don't own Ranma ½, Rumiko Takahashi and Shogakukan do.

Chapter 01 - Here's Harry!

A dense veil of fog blanketed the neighborhood, muffling both sight and sound. It was early morning, so Grimmauld Place was mercifully free of traffic. That is, until the veil parted and a lone silhouette trudged forward. Head and shoulders were bowed as if under a great weight, though the backpack the figure bore was nowhere near full. Eventually his slow gait brought him to a standstill in front of the oldest, most dilapidated house on a street of houses that had long since seen better days.

A damp breeze thinned the fog, revealing green eyes staring up at Number 12.

The young man ran a hand through his messy black hair, delaying the inevitable, until finally he mounted the steps and stood in front of the door. "Well, this is it," came his whispered voice.

A flash of light was instantly followed by a crack of thunder. Unseen clouds above opened up, bathing the city with unseasonably cold rain.

"Great," came the voice again, now louder and higher-pitched. A head covered in red hair thumped against the door. "Just great."

"Woof!"

A large dog bounded up the steps, head-butting the person at the door. Once solid black, the dog had acquired a bizarre pattern of white body with black legs, white head with black eyes and ears. It was still undeniably a dog, yet it was also disturbingly reminiscent of a bear.

"Woof!"

"Alright, alright!" A wand was drawn and pressed against the door. "Harry Potter requests entrance."

Nothing happened.

There was another flash of lightning as thunder rumbled deeply.

"Woof! Woof!"

The young man scowled. "I'm gonna neuter you, you mangy mutt! I swear to Merlin I will!"

"Woof!"

After a deep breath, the wand was once again pressed against the door. "Harriet Black requests entrance."

A metallic thunk reverberated through the door, which then creaked loudly as it slowly opened to reveal a dark, dank hallway.

"Hasn't changed a bit."

The dog ignored the commentary in favor of charging into the house, barking and carrying on as it galloped towards the kitchen.

The lone figure stepped inside, avoiding the troll-foot umbrella stand. Noises could be heard from the floors above as people were awoken by the dog's incessant barking.

"What's that noise?"

"Who let a dog in here?"

"Sirius! It must be Sirius, which means Harry's back, too!"

The house fairly shook as people thundered down multiple flights of steps, all eager to greet the new arrivals.

"Harry!" cried a young, brunette girl in excitement, only to stop in astonishment halfway down the last flight.

"Oi, Hermione, what's the big idea?"

"Yeah, why'd you stop?"

The brunette pointed, and the others joined her in shock for only a moment before wands were drawn and pointed at the busty, redheaded girl standing silently in the entrance hallway.

"Who are you?" Hermione demanded. "Who are you and how'd you get in here?"

Head bowed, the girl took a deep breath. "It's me. I'm Harry. Harry Potter."

"Hoof!" The dog had returned, a bone of dubious origins clamped securely in its jaw.

"...Sorry about this," she finished lamely.

The kitchen was packed with people and noise as everyone tried to make their opinions known. Even the bizarre dog chimed in occasionally. Only the mysterious girl remained silent, head bowed as she absently traced random patterns with her finger on the old wooden table. Perhaps it was because she was sitting alone at one end of the room while several of the loud, opinionated people kept their wands firmly pointed in the direction of her and the dog.

"Professor Dumbledore!"

The room quieted almost instantly.

"I came as quickly as I could," the old wizard replied. "I take it no one has questioned our guest?"

"We thought it best if you did it," said Molly Weasley, shooting a suspicious look in the direction of the girl.

"You did the right thing," came a voice from behind Dumbledore, and out stepped Mad-Eye Moody, wand already raised. "Best to let the experts handle this."

"You claim to be Harry Potter and were found with Harry Potter's wand," the old wizard said, taking a seat next to the young girl. "Yet I can say with some certainty that you look nothing at all like him." She finally looked up, and her bright green eyes met Dumbledore's widening blue ones. "Although... you do bear a striking resemblance to Lily Potter."

"Can you prove you're Harry Potter?" Mad-Eye asked brusquely.

"Will my patronus do?"

Mad-Eye snorted. "Sure, if we were foolish enough to give you a wand."

"I think... I think that may be a good idea." Dumbledore said, causing the room to erupt again.

"Albus?" Moody's crazy eye stopped spinning and fixed squarely on Dumbledore.

The Headmaster raised a hand to quiet everyone again. "I know there is some risk, but I believe it's worth it."

The others in the kitchen looked at Dumbledore as if he were insane, but Arthur nodded and pulled from his jacket the wand that had been taken from the girl earlier. Dumbledore accepted it and handed it over. "If you would, please cast your patronus."

"And nothing else," Mad-Eye added, leveling his wand at the girl. "The first hint I see that you're casting something else, I'll curse you into next Wednesday."

The girl sighed. With exaggerated care, she raised her wand and incanted, "Expecto Patronum!"

A silvery ball exploded out of the wand, and after a long moment it took form: a doe.

"Bollocks!" The girl's head hit the table with a loud thump, though this was mostly lost in the din of people's reactions.

"I knew it!" Mad-Eye jabbed his wand into the girl's side. "Start talking, girlie! Who are you and how did you get in here? Where is Harry Potter, and how did you get his wand?"

"Alastor," Dumbledore said, putting a hand on the other wizard's shoulder as he watched the doe patronus disappear. "Let's not be too hasty."

"That wasn't Potter's patronus," Mad-Eye replied, but the Headmaster focused on the girl, who slowly raised her head back up.

"Maybe..." she started, "maybe some hot water would help?"

"How would water be relevant to a Patronus Charm?" This came from Hermione, who had been sitting closest to the girl and found it difficult not to ask questions.

"I was going to need hot water anyway to explain what happened to us," the girl replied, "but maybe it would help with this spell, too."

Dumbledore fixed his measuring gaze on her for several long seconds before finally saying, "Very well, one last chance. If this doesn't prove your identity, though, we'll have to move to other, less pleasant means of interrogation."

"Veritaserum?" Mad-Eye asked.

Dumbledore nodded. "Severus has some and is awaiting word from me, should we need it."

The girl remained silent as Molly Weasley brought over a tea kettle of steaming water, which Dumbledore promptly levitated across the table.

Whatever they had been expecting, her pouring water over the dog sitting next to her and then over her own head was clearly not it.

The fact that the two intruders immediately shifted into Sirius Black and Harry Potter left everyone mute in astonishment. Into the silence, Harry once more incanted, "Expecto Patronum!" This time, a familiar stag burst forth from his wand. It cantered around the kitchen, brushing past the speechless witches and wizards before fading away.

The disappearance of the stag was a signal for renewed clamor as everyone tried to talk at once.

"Silence!" Dumbledore called out, halting the various conversations.

"Harry?" Hermione asked in a small voice, reaching out to him. Harry nodded, and the brunette witch threw herself against him, pulling him into a tight hug. This continued for several seconds until the Headmaster cleared his throat.

"Yes, well, I guess we can accept that Harry is, indeed, Harry." He quickly glanced to his side, where Mad-Eye nodded once before stuffing his wand into his jacket. "However, I think we'd all like to hear what happened to you to cause this most unusual transformation."

Hermione separated herself from Harry, allowing him to sit back down. Everyone looked at him expectantly.

Harry took a deep breath, then his hand shot out, pointing to his side where Sirius was leaning nonchalantly against the wall.

"It's all his fault!"

"It was an accident!"

"Sirius Black!" Molly cried. "What did you do?"

"I didn't know!" Sirius protested.

"And that's the point," Harry continued. "You didn't know. You didn't investigate. He tried to tell us, but you refused to listen!"

Sirius sagged a little against the wall. "I know, I didn't ask enough questions. But it didn't turn out so bad..."

"Not so bad?" Harry demanded, standing up. "Not so bad?"

"Mr. Potter," Dumbledore interjected. "Please, calm yourself."

Harry huffed and dropped heavily back into his chair. Hermione scooted closer while everyone — especially Dumbledore — waited apprehensively for him to continue.

"Fine," Harry finally said. "We were travelling through China, looking for magical communities where we could get training for me. We weren't having much luck, though. What few communities we found were very isolated and not at all welcoming to strangers."

Dumbledore nodded. "After the communists took over the muggle government, their purges of dissidents eliminated a great many witches and wizards." He looked up at Sirius. "I believe I mentioned this in a letter to your godfather after you two left on Buckbeak at the end of last year."

Harry groaned as he ran a hand down his face. "Why am I not surprised? Anyway, after a couple of weeks, Sirius came back from some bar with a story about a special training ground that was supposed to be helpful. It wouldn't teach me magic, but it would force me to learn how to jump, roll, and dodge. Sirius said that I needed to get into better shape."

"And I was right, wasn't I?"

Harry refused to look at his godfather. After all he'd been through, he was loathe to admit that the man-child had even a semblance of a point.

"So the next morning we walked to nearby Jusenkyo," Harry continued. "There was a guide who tried to explain the place to us, but Sirius insisted that we start immediately. There were dozens and dozens of small pools of water, each with a tall bamboo pole erected in the center. Before I knew what was happening, Sirius had banished me to the top of one, where I was barely able to hold on. Sirius apparated to the top of another and laughed at me." Next to him, Hermione practically growled. "I cast Aguamenti at him, knocking him off. Unfortunately, between the pressure of the spell and my own loose handhold, I fell off as well."

"Were you hurt?" Hermione asked.

"No, I fell into the pool below, and it was pretty deep. When I came back to the surface, well..." Harry hesitated. "I was a girl."

"The magic was in the pool of water, then?" Dumbledore asked.

Harry nodded. "The guide came over to me and, since Sirius wasn't around to interrupt, explained that I'd fallen into the 'Pool of Drowned Girl.' Anyone who falls into the pool is cursed to turn into a girl when doused with cold water. They can only return to their original form when doused with warm water."

"Remarkable," Dumbledore whispered, then turned to Sirius. "And you?"

Sirius scowled. "I instinctively shifted to my animagus form when I fell. As a dog, it's easier to land safely. Apparently being a dog interacted badly with the magic of Jusenkyo when I fell into the 'Pool of Drowned Panda'. I should turn into a panda bear when doused with cold water, but instead I turn into a weird panda/dog hybrid."

"You look a lot like a Chow Chow," Hermione interjected. "That's a dog breed from China. They don't normally have the coloration of pandas, but they can be made up to look that way."

Sirius nodded. "That's what the guide told me. Also, I can't shift into my animagus form anymore. I can only become that weird dog, and only with water."

"I almost hesitate to ask," Dumbledore said, "but did anything else happen to you?"

Harry glared at his godfather, but Sirius studiously avoided meeting Harry's eyes.

"Mr. Potter?"

Harry sighed. "Getting cursed like this wasn't enough for Sirius to learn his lesson. When we left Jusenkyo, Sirius decided to take us to an Amazon village which he'd also heard about in that bar. Said he 'wanted to make a man out of me,' in addition to seeing what sort of training they could offer."

"He didn't!" Hermione cried.

"Sirius Black!" Molly shouted. "How could you!"

"And... how did that go?" Dumbledore asked, sounding unsure if he really wanted an answer.

"Not like you'd think," Harry answered. "Sirius immediately began hitting on every woman he saw. They didn't take it very well, but somehow over the course of the argument I got blamed. Some blue-haired girl was named their champion and challenged me to a duel. I stunned and bound her fast, then we ran."

"That doesn't sound so bad," Ron commented.

"Except that they followed us," Harry continued. "And kept following us, too, no matter where we went."

"How far did they pursue you?" Dumbledore asked.

"I think we lost them somewhere in the Australian Outback."

Sirius nodded. "I'm sure we lost them."

Harry glared at his godfather, not feeling nearly so confident. Those Amazons had been far, far too good at tracking them. He suspected that they had magic of some sort and had used it to repeatedly find them, which meant he couldn't completely let his guard down, even now. And possibly not ever.

Dumbledore looked back and forth between the two before finally saying, "I hope this won't come as too much of an imposition, Mr. Potter, but would you let me study you as you transform?"

"Do you... do you think you can reverse it?" He hadn't dared to hope that the curse could be removed, but if anyone could do it then surely it was Dumbledore.

Dumbledore shrugged. "I am not familiar with this magic, so in all honesty, I cannot say. However, in principle all magic has a counter, so you should not give up all hope."

Harry nodded. "OK."

Dumbledore pulled out his wand, but before Harry could do anything there came a cry of "Aguamenti!" from behind him and he was hit in the back of the head with a spray of water from Sirius' wand.

"Sirius!" exclaimed several people around the kitchen. Dumbledore, though, was casting charms on Harry as he shifted into a buxom, redheaded witch. Harry never found the transformation painful, fortunately, even if Dudley's old castoffs were a bit tight in places for him to be entirely comfortable wearing them as a girl.

"Fascinating," Dumbledore whispered. "Truly fascinating."

"Did you find anything useful?" the redhead asked as water cascaded down from her hair to her shoulders and soaking the front of her shirt.

"I'm not sure, Mr. Potter—"

"Black, actually," Sirius interrupted, getting a growl in response from Harry.

"Excuse me?" Dumbledore asked, confused.

"This obviously isn't a 'Mr.' anything," Sirius replied, gesturing towards Harry. "As such, I've adopted this young lady into my house as Miss Harriet Black."

"I hate that name!" Harry hissed. "Harriet? Couldn't you have come up with anything better?"

Sirius waved his hand dismissively. "It's perfect. This way, someone calling you the wrong name can quickly correct themselves, and you won't have any problem if you mistakenly respond when someone uses the name of your alternate form."

Harry was about to protest when he saw that Dumbledore was nodding in approval. "That's a good idea, Sirius, especially since we're going to have to make accommodations for young Miss Black here in Hogwarts."

"Accommodations?" Harry asked in a strained voice, dismayed that the others were actually agreeing with his godfather.

"Of course, my boy... er, my girl," the Headmaster corrected himself, and Harry grimaced. "It's a virtual certainty that you'll end up transforming into Harriet at some point, and we'll need a good story to explain that."

"Exactly," Sirius agreed, smiling in a way that Harry had learned to fear. "Harriet Black here is my long-lost daughter, the product of a dalliance in my youth who was spirited away for her own protection during the last war. She has returned to Britain to learn more about her past and her amazing father. However, since she received advanced training while in hiding, she's only taking a few private lessons in Hogwarts."

Dumbledore nodded again. "That will explain why she isn't sorted into a house or taking regular classes with everyone else, but will still account for why she appears occasionally. Very clever, Sirius."

"Naturally!"

Harriet groaned and looked around the kitchen for any sort of support. Instead, she found one face after another looking at her in curious mixtures of fascination and horror. Everyone, that is, except her best mate. For some reason, Ron was staring with an expression that was akin to how he regarded platters of food at the Opening Feast at Hogwarts. Even stranger was the fact that his eyes were fixed somewhat lower than Harriet's face.

"Ron? Ron?" Harriet snapped her fingers several times to get his attention, unsuccessfully. "Hermione?" Harriet asked, looking to the side. "Do you know what's wrong with Ron?"

"Harry... uh, I mean, Harriet?" Hermione replied, also looking down at Harriet's chest. "Are you wearing a bra?"

"Of course not! I'm a bloke!"

Hermione frowned as she finally looked up to meet Harriet's eyes. "Not at the moment!"

Harriet shrugged, which seemed to make Ron's problem worse. "Well, I'm usually a bloke. I can't exactly wear girls' stuff all the time, just in case I transform."

"Well, get one from your trunk and put it on. You're... you're a bit distracting."

Harriet looked at Hermione in confusion. "My trunk? I don't have a bra. I told you, I'm a bloke."

"Harriet!"

"What?"

Hermione turned to face Sirius. "Didn't you take her shopping for proper clothing for when she transforms?"

Sirius shrugged. "What do I know about buying girls clothes? And bras, no less? Ask me how to take one off with two fingers in the dark and I'll tell you. But buying one? Not a clue."

Hermione looked as though she wanted to screech, but somehow she managed to hold it in. Instead, she grabbed Harriet's hand and started hauling her out of the kitchen. "Come on, you can wear one of mine."

Harriet eyed her dubiously. "You think it'll fit?" she asked without thinking.

Hermione's expression grew positively stormy. "I'll make it fit," she growled.

"Ginny, where are you going?" Molly asked as her daughter jumped up from the table.

"If you think I'm going to miss this..." Ginny replied over her shoulder as she ran to follow the other two.

Ron was still staring into space, a dazed expression on his face now.

Dumbledore, too, was staring off into the distance, ignoring the raucous chatter that had started amongst everyone else. "The power he knows not?" he mused softly as plans shifted and reformed in his mind.