AN: I am so very sorry for the wait. My humble and deepest gratitude to those of you who have graced my unworthy self with your readership. Classes have only recently been mercifully lifted and I've had a bit of trouble focusing on this story. Nevertheless, I have persevered for you! I hope I can keep this up over the summer.
"You and Makoto sure became friends fast," came a voice that I nearly forgot about.
I jerked my head up at her voice, failing to hide my surprise. I could only imagine how silly I looked falling to the ground with the release of a pent up sigh. An embarrassed chuckle left my lungs as my knees creaked my frame back up. I brushed off the creases in my slacks.
""Friends" might be too strong of a word," I sniffed. "Rather, I would say we're more like acquaintances. Acquaintances with conflicting interests that compel me to intervene and find a compromise, even when the solution provides my opponent with greater benefits than myself."
My vain ramblings fell upon deaf ears as Saionji gave me a look reserved for someone with a visible deformity. She scanned me with curious eyes and held a lopsided grin etched with slight pity. Why I decided to throw so much compromising information at her I'll never know, but I'm glad she had no idea what I just spouted. To her it sounded as though I had just tossed out a ton of useless babble. I could never hold a facade of confidence for very long in front of people.
By now we had left the stairs and headed down a hallway I assumed led to our destination, marching only to the tempo of our clacking shoes. Where did most people eat lunch? Oh, that's right, there's a cafeteria. I began to wonder what Japanese cafeteria food tasted like, but concluded that there was no time for that. I had no idea how long lunch would last, but I felt its end slowly creeping up on us.
I guess now would be as good a time as any to start bringing Saionji under my puppet strings. Working out the rest of my plan with Makoto would have to come later. His rooftop lunch with Katsura just better remain as innocent as I believe it was. My memory on the show's details was starting to haze up.
"So," I attempted at an icebreaker. "Do we really have the time to go to the library before lunch is over?"
Saionji stopped at this. She looked at me and switched to a face like I had told a disgusting but funny joke, obviously unsure of what I meant. Coupled with that silly strand of hair bobbing from the top of her head like an antennae, she painted a precise portrait of how innocent looks can deceive so easily. I imagined a bloody scream in the distance.
"O-of course we have time," she laughed dismissively. "Why would I be coming out here otherwise?" An uncomfortable leg fidget whispered a different story brewing in her head. I admit, prancing about and watching these kids squirm while fully aware of their problems did feel empowering, but I needed to cut to the chase with her.
"Look," I whispered gravely, throwing quick glances around the hallway. "I know why you really left the roof and wanted me to come along." No holding back. It's not like I have to tell her all the details, that would condemn any further conversation anyway. Her stern gaze locked on my unsuspecting frame, slapping me right off the top of my confidence surf. If I freeze up now, I can kiss this plot good bye.
"You're kinda weirding me out, new guy," she pointed with suspicious eyes. "I'll admit it, I just want to give them room to get closer together, and we were in the way. Don't let him know I told you, but he really likes Katsura." She whispered that last bit with an evil grin.
Of course I knew about Makoto's crush, and I also know about yours. I needed to get her to admit her feelings for this kid before he went too far. For my plan to work without too many hitches, I needed to place myself in the favor of both parties, or at least convince them that they could rely on me. I needed to get these kids together.
"But WHY are you helping him?" I asked, raising my voice slightly. "People don't usually help other people with relationship problems on a whim."
"Because we're friends of course," she dismissed, her face lined with the smallest tinge of rose. "He's hopeless otherwise, and this is none of your business."
"Oh, but it is my business," I smirked, not knowing what I was saying. She was right, of course. I had no business meddling in these kid's affairs, but there was no time for second thoughts now. "I'm friends with the guy as well, I too wish for him to live a physically painless love-life." You murderer. "And while I may not seem like it at the moment, I'm here to help you both out."
She stared stared at me with a tiny, angered pout. "What do you mean by that? And stop acting like you're so cool."
"Your feelings, Saionji," I sighed, finally giving up on any dramatic pacing. "Why are you helping him date another girl when you want him just as badly?" Blech. I cringed at the corny sound of my own voice.
She suddenly appeared frantic, throwing feverish looks up and down the corridor, as if I had just recounted an entry from her diary. Her pallor deepened into a deep crimson and she laughed nervously. Her eyes no longer took interest in my direction, instead looking everywhere else.
"Y-you're crazy!" she stuttered unconvincingly. "I don't like Makoto that way, we're just friends. I mean, even if I did, there's no way I could compete with Katsura. But I wouldn't want to, since I don't like him like that, especially with that dumb vacant look he always has and his jelly backbone."
Bravo on that overreaction, miss. You would think these kids knew that if you wanted to conceal your thoughts, you should refrain from getting so worked up about it. I'm a little embarrassed at how obvious she is.
"I don't think I can believe you," I dismissed, very sure of myself. Her face twitched.
"Really?" she squeaked unimpressed. "And what makes you so cocky?"
"Would you like me to list my reasons?"
She nodded challengingly, still unsure about the whole ordeal. Alright, to them I've only been here a few hours, but I know their story. Even if from her perspective I've only been here a short time, she still cannot deny the facts I'm about to lay before her.
"The way you look at him," I began, "How your eyes glue to Makoto the second he enters a room."
Saionji glared at me. "Do you watch m-"
"How your mouth takes off at a million miles a second when you two talk, like on the roof just now," I continued, unfaltering. I needed to keep my train of thought from derailing. Most of these details were being made up on the spot.
"I don't-"
"When he's near, your face reddens against your will. You become jittery and energetic, but your mind clouds and you become unsure of yourself, so you block the feelings out. You're afraid, afraid of getting hurt. How could he ever feel the same way for you? No, instead you seal the thoughts and help him find another girl, internally denying everything. But you're wrong, you're only hurting yourself. If you would just-"
A stinging slap! echoed around the vacant hall, ricocheting and threatening to shatter the windows. I found my eyes facing the wall, my head turned a full ninety degrees by the force of the girl's slender hand. The reaction of my foot falling back feels delayed, and the entire side of my face just started to smolder with fiery pain. I had never been hit by a girl before, in fact I've rarely physically fought at all. I brought a shaking hand up and tenderly touched my cheek, my flesh hot to the touch. My neck creaked as I pained myself to face the girl I provoked.
Her eyes had turned to pure liquid pools that threatened to spill over, darkened in shadow by the tilt of her head. I could see a hatred in them that stabbed at my core, but the emotion was not for me. She brought her flushed face down entirely, hiding from my gaze, her shoulders subtly shaking with silent sobs. I could only stare, stunned.
Well, good going, Hudson. You went and made a girl cry. You're a piece of work, you know that? Maybe this is why you shouldn't talk with people so much, because you're a complete jackass. Any more bright ideas? Why don't you go ahead and start poking fun at her hair? Perhaps by then someone will see this abominable scene and deduce your bullying and finally beat some sense into your faulty cranium.
My throat began to squeeze out an apology when Saionji suddenly bent down to sweep something off the floor. As I watched her, I realized I could barely make out what she had grabbed, it looked like a black blur. She stood back up, finally looking back at me while wiping at her large eyes, any trace of malice vanquished. A dainty hand stretched out to me, holding a pair of spectacles in its palm. Saionji had slapped the glasses off of my face and I hadn't even noticed. With a shaking hand, I gingerly plucked my eyesight from her.
"Saionji, I-I'm so sor-"
"No," she interrupted, a faint smile playing upon her lips. "You're absolutely right, I have been lying to myself."
I had to strain my ears to hear her now, her voice coming in a strangled whisper. "I really do lo- lo-"
"It's okay," I comforted, nesting a hand on her shoulder without thinking. "You don't have to tell me, you'll tell him in good time. We're gonna fix this little mess."
I tried my hardest to manage some kind of cool grin, despite the fact that my legs felt like bowls of pudding and my face still steamed like a sauna. Saionji looked up at me, her thin eyebrows crooked in a mix of curiosity.
"I don't know how you know all this," she sighed, the redness in her face receding. "Maybe I am that obvious. But why are you helping me?"
I withdrew my hand, caught off guard by the question. Why indeed? Why did I feel it so vital that I aid these kids and save their lives? Was it just that, to be a hero? No, there was something else there, something that helped me to empathize with this girl's feelings. Something from my past.
"I just want to make sure you succeed where I failed," came my reply with an unfamiliar truthfulness.
Any further conversation would have to wait, as the bell signaling the end of lunch sliced through the halls. I gave her the smallest, sincerest smile I could muster, and she returned in kind. As we strolled down the corridor to class, dodging the crowds that spawned from nowhere, I breathed in deep, assuring myself that the hardest part was over with, getting the feisty one to cooperate. At least, I hope that was the hardest part.
By the last class of the day, I could barely keep my nose from crushing against my desk. Even in such a foreign atmosphere, school was school, boring and predictable. The day had been taxing on my energy, to say the least. I've partaken in more drama within the last few hours than perhaps my entire lifespan. Yet despite my mind's alarming need for rest, my thoughts still wandered ceaselessly. It dawned on me that I fought this fight alone. Sure, I may have won over an important piece to this game, but I felt uncertain about trusting her completely.
I needed someone who saw things the way I did, someone willing to risk more than any sane person should, just to make sure these kids avoided self destruction. Someone with a proclivity for harebrained plans that had no business succeeding as much as they did. Someone who could fight with a bit more bravado than myself when it came to what he cared for.
At the blare of the dismissal bell, I fought through a crowd of chatty students, failing to make a comfortable path for the exit. I popped out the doorway and into the bustling hall like a champagne cork. I began to panic, I had lost sight of Makoto, and I doubted I could remember the route back "home". Just when I thought I would have to begin the rude task of shoving, I spotted his familiar crop of black hair. But before I ran to catch up, my attention swapped to someone else. Someone whose glare burned holes in the back of Makoto's head from behind a pair of large, round spectacles.
