She crosses her arms in front of her and tilts her chin up a bit higher, straightening her spine making herself look braver than she actually feels. She nervously tucks a piece of fallen hair behind her ear, and he watches the action with what she can only assume is great affection before she hugs her arms tight against her chest once again. "You should know, I don't… I can't remember anything. So if you're expecting me to…"
"I know, Regina," he interrupts softly, and she can tell by his reaction, by the look of understanding he is giving her, that is aware of so much more than she.
That's a surprise and it makes her even more defensive. Questions like, how long have you known and how long have you been looking, are running ramped though her mind. "How do you know?"
"May I come in?" he implores, adding, "I can explain everything, but I think it would be better if you were sitting down."
"I'm not letting you into my home until you tell me how you think you know me so well." She'll be damned if he believes she is going to let him in without some kind of proof.
He chuckles at that and her brows rise. There is something in that smile, she thinks, and it's not just the way it makes her stomach flip. There is no doubt the man is handsome, but it earns him no favors.
"I thought you might say something, like that, which is why I brought this."
He holds out a picture, tells her to take it, and she does. It's her alright. Her hair is much shorter, and she thinks the boy in the picture with her looks to be about Natalie's oldest son's age, ten maybe eleven? "Who is he?" she asks, just as her throat closes.
"He's your son." His voice is soft and carries a hint of pride.
Her head tips up from the picture, to the man in front of her, then back again. She traces a finger over the face of the young man in the photo. How can a mother forget her child? She thinks of her daughter sleeping upstairs, of her delivery, and holding her for the first time. Regina cannot imagine ever forgetting such a moment. Tears sting at her eyes, but she pushes them back and clears her throat. "This still doesn't explain how you know me."
"My name is, Robin," he tells her with so much open affection she can't bring herself to look away. "Our past is a bit… complicated," Regina sighs, of course it is. Why would it be any less? That would be too easy, and with the way her luck seems to go, easy is never in the cards for her. Unaware of her inner mantra, he presses on undeterred, "but I promise you, I will do my best to explain everything, to help you remember it all, but what I can tell you is that I love you, Regina Mills, and I haven't stopped looking for you since the day you left."
Her breath catches in her throat, as she takes it all in. Her eyes travel from his rugged boots, to his tan pants, a dark blue sweater pulled over a lighter blue button up. He wears a jacket, and green scarf, his hair is neat and his slight beard makes him almost unbearably handsome, and she thinks over not necessarily what he's saying, but what he's not. "So I left you?"
"No, its..." He pauses and shakes his head, as he admits, "Honestly, love, I'm not sure why it is that you left. I was hoping we can figure that out together?" he tells her, his gaze imploring and seeking her understanding. "Please, may I come in?"
Regina takes a deep breath but nods once, and holds open the door. He steps through, though he stands to the side, and waits for her to follow. She's not sure what to do or say. There is a silent tension that fills the entry way, so she doesn't speak but moves into the living room.
She asks if she can get him something to drink, to which he politely declines. It's not quite dusk yet, but the large bay windows of the living room face east, and the light is sparse, so she flips on a few lights, and takes a seat on the couch and motions for him to take the spot next to her.
Regina watches him with interest. The way he hesitates, as if he's unsure how much distance to put between them, the look of determination and perhaps even fear that crosses his brow. She realizes that it's not only she who is nervous.
He takes a seat leaving a couple feet between them, and he meets her gaze, his eyes searching hers. For what he is looking she's not sure, but her own eyes are immersed in his, and for a moment she just wants to lose herself in them. Wants to find herself somewhere in those blue depths that peer back at her without reservation. He seems to know she needs this, and his hands are clasped tightly in his lap, she can see he is resisting the urge to reach out to her. There is a warmth filling her as it finally settles on her that this man, Robin, could in fact be the very man she's been trying to remember for so long. The father of the little girl sleeping upstairs.
Does he even know about the baby, she wonders.
As he looks at her, his mouth opens, but it shuts just as quickly, and he sighs while running a hand through his hair. He gives her a sad smile, before conceding, "I'm afraid now that I'm here, now that you're finally within arm's reach, I'm having trouble finding the words to express how relieved I am to see you."
She can see the sincerity in his eyes, the way he looks at her with a soft familiarity, and yet she can't help the way her guard comes up. She has no choice. Not until she knows for sure. Not until he can offer more proof than a few words of longing, no matter how sincere they may be, and an old picture he could have made. She's seen what people can do with Photoshop; she glances at it at the check stands of the supermarket. Even if her heart wants to believe in this more than anything, it's not longer just her she has to worry about. She has to protect her daughter, too.
"I'm sorry, but I'm still a bit confused," she begins, frustrated how awkward this is and how she wishes he would just tell her everything already. "You say that you know me, but how? Are we friends?"
His lips tip into a small smile. "We are friends."
She narrows her eyes at him. He's holding something back, she can tell by the way he looks at her as he said the words, her head drops down and she asks, "Just friends?"
He chuckles again and its comforting, the ease at which he does, makes her think that this isn't the first time he's had this conversation with her. As his gaze meets hers again he grows serious in his reply, "More than friends, Regina. We've always been more."
She looks back down at the photograph she's still holding and asks the question that's been on her mind since she took it from his hand. "This boy," she pauses and looks up at him expectantly, and he knows, Henry, he tells her, and she smiles a bit at that. "Henry, is… is he our son?"
He smiles but shakes his head. "No, actually, you adopted him before we met."
Oh. Okay, well that she wasn't expecting. Regina picks at an invisible string on her robe. "Where is he?"
"Home. Back in Storybrooke, which is where I've come to take you."
Regina blinks. Wait, what? She stands, moves a few feet away from him because she needs the distance, and he rises as well, which only makes her more nervous, but he doesn't move toward her. For that much she is grateful. "Take me? Look, I don't know who you think you are, but I've never heard of this Storybrooke, and believe me if I knew that's where I had a family waiting for me, I would have heard about it long before now because I've been looking for months."
"Have you?"
"Of course I have." She throws her arms out. "Why wouldn't I?"
"We... They were under the impression that it was what you wanted."
"What I wanted?" Her voice is low, dangerously low. She cannot ever imagine wanting to leave her son in exchange for a life she knows nothing about. Not then, and especially not pregnant because she had to have known. "How can you say that? You make it sound like I did this to myself."
His voice rises, and even then she can tell that he's holding back, trying to keep himself from moving towards her. "Didn't you? Regina, you left with no word, not even a note. We had no idea where to even start looking for you. For a brief moment we thought..." His shoulders slump, he warily bring a hand up to cover his mouth, and he looks tired. Very tired. Her heart tightens when he looks back up at her. She knows heartbreak when she sees it. She stares at in the mirror every day.
"I'm sorry," he tells her, "I never meant to raise my voice like that, Regina. It's just, I thought I lost you, and despite what you may believe there hasn't been a day that has gone by that I haven't thought of you."
She rubs her face and threads her fingers through her long hair. "I've been here the entire time."
"But none of us knew. How could we?" He takes a step away, then another, and before she knows it he is pacing in front of her. "It took us months to figure out the you crossed the town line, not even the imp could trace you, and then once we knew, once we knew that you had gone we had to figure out some way to find you."
Regina throws her arms in the air. This man was making absolutely no sense. What town line? She couldn't picture ever walking away from her child. "I don't understand what you're talking about. You're acting like I left without a trace, but if you know me like you claim to, how could you not think to look here first? I've lived here my whole life..." He's shaking his head at the floor now, she pauses and he looks up and meeting her eyes. "What? Are you going to tell me I haven't?"
"No, but what I am going to do is tell you a story, Regina and I need you to keep a very open mind because it's going to sound a bit… crazy," he finishes, as he lets out a heavy sigh.
Crazy, she almost snorts. This entire situation is already crazy, and she turns away from him. A voice in her head tells her, but isn't this what you've always wanted? To hind him.
Then it hits her square in the chest, and she turns to look at him, her daughters father. There isn't a doubt in her mind. How could he not be? She takes a few steps forward, until she's close enough to look into his clear blue eyes, which are now becoming wet and she can tell that he wants to touch her, but doesn't want to frighten her either.
She studies his expression for a moment and then she brings her hand up and touches his cheek. His eyes are taking her in, every detail, and when his hand comes up a moment later, he takes a bit of her hair rubbing it between his fingertips. It's gotten much longer, he tells her, and all she can do is nod. They stand like that for a while before she says, "Please, tell me we were together. You talk about us like we meant something to one another, and if that's true, there's something I need to tell you. I need to know, Robin."
Dropping his hand, he takes one of her hands in his bringing it up between them. "Yes, we were... are together. I've never loved anyone like I love you. You are my heart, Regina."
Tears gather in her eyes, but she pays them no mind, even as they fall unchecked down her cheeks. "You really never knew?"
"Never knew what?"
She takes a deep breath, and she opens her mouth to speak, but it seems as if her daughter wants to make her own presence known, and chooses that exact moment to cry.
His eyes widen, and they drift from hers toward the direction of the sound above them and then back. They are pleading for an explanation, but there isn't one she can give him in the seconds before she has to go collect the baby. So she puts her hand on his arm, tells him she'll be right back, and the fact that he is unmoving, the only sign that he's heard her, is the barest of perceptible nods and she leaves him there. Waiting for the moment when she returns with their daughter.
A/N: Real Quick- Thank you all for the faves, follows, and reviews! I love that you all love this and love all your thoughts, please keep them coming. And to la-la kate for all the help, even when she's a super busy momma, xoxox!