[[Author's Note: I'm baaaack. =) Sorry everyone had to wait so long! This chapter made me a bundle of nerves and I really had to take my time to write it- but I think I got it right.

Once again: Thank you to zebrahater for being such a wonderful beta reader. I usually end up writing my chapters when I'm half asleep and from 2-7am when everything is quiet and no one bothers me- so you can only imagine what a pain it must be for him. ;P

AND ******This story is rated M. If you take offense to anything that entails I suggest you just not read this chapter.******

EDIT: Had to fix a few corrections I missed in my beta read that were annoying the hell out of me so I re-posted.

Chapter Fifteen: [Whims of the Heart]

[4th day of flight to Omega/Commander's Cabin/9AM]

Commander John Shepard sat at the edge of his bed and rested his gaze upon the tattooed woman who fiddled away at his terminal. "What are you doing over there, Jack?"

The woman shrugged off the question, "Nothin', just reviewing the messages Mordin has been sending you."

John leaned back onto the pads of his palms and grinned, "Don't take those messages to seriously—he doesn't know that we're not having sex. Mordin is just trying to help and just wants us to be careful."

Jack raised her hands behind her neck and rested the weight of her head. "You shoulda' expected as much."

Shepard raised a brow, "Meaning?"

"Between the tats and the attitude most people think screwing is a given when it comes to me—that it comes standard or some shit."

Shepard smiled, "…ooooor, it just might be the fact that the entire Normandy crew knows about us openly."

Jack leaned over to get a better view of Shepard. "How the hell you know that?"

"It's simple. Joker AND Kasumi know. And if those two know then…"

Jack groaned, "…everyone knows."

Shepard chuckled, "Bingo."

Jack pushed herself up from her seat and made her way over to sit down near the commander instead. "Hey, Shepard?"

John turned his head to look over the woman beside him, "Yes?"

"…What exactly are we anyways?"

Shepard sat up and reached over to take her chin. Callused fingertips grazed over the softness of Jack's skin, turning her head and forcing the biotic to look into the commander's eyes. "…I thought it was obvious."

Jack could feel the corner of her lip begin to lift as she unconsciously began to lean in for a kiss. "…mind clearin' it up then?"

Shepard grinned playfully, "…you know what?"

Jack blinked in confusion, irritation becoming noticeable on her facial features as Shepard stopped an opportunity to kiss. "…what?"

"I think I'll go one step further. I'm going to ask you, you'll answer, and what we are will become more than official; it'll be so crystal clear between us there will never be any doubt in anyone's mind."

The ex-convict was officially annoyed, "Shepard what the hell you talkin' about? I'm perfectly fucking happy with a one word answer. What are we?"

John shook his hand at her, "Aw come on, just bear with me here for a second alright?"

Jack shook her head disapprovingly and exhaled, "Just hurry up and do whatever it is you're gonna do..."

The commander smiled brightly and stood up quickly, reaching out to take hold of the biotics' hands and pulling her up to her feet, "Okay just stand there—don't move."

Jack eyeballed him, "…the hell, Shepard?"

John Shepard suddenly had gotten down on one knee in front of the ex-convict, taking one of her hands softly into his and raising his baby blue eyes up to meet Jack's hazel. "Jack, will you—"

"ohshitohshitohshit," Jack took her free hand and punched Shepard square in the nose to stop the question the quickest way she knew how.

There was a soft popping nose when John's head snapped back as he lost balance, falling onto his ass as his left hand came up to grab the now throbbing tissue. "FU—!" The commander brought two fingers from each hand and pushed the slightly crooked nose back into position with a soft crack. Shepard's voice was loud and confused, "Jack! What the hell!"

The biotic pointed an accusing finger towards the man on the floor then proceeded to her old ways of pacing back and forth in frustration and panic. When she finally spoke her voice was practically shouting, "You know I ain't ready for that shit!"

Shepard pinched his nose and held his head back to try and subdue the blood. When he replied, it was in a very nasal tone, "—I was going to ask you to formally be my girlfriend! That way it'd be concrete and completely obvious with no room for what ifs' or second thoughts!"

Jack's eyes got big, "I thought—well why didn't you just fuckin' say so?"

"I JUST TRIED!"

The biotic spat back, "WELL FUCK! How was I supposed ta' know?"

Shepard growled lightly, "You could have waited till I asked!"

Jack's paced around the room in larger strides, "Goddammit, Shepard!" The biotic could hear John groan quietly as he got to his feet then preceded to sit on the foot of his bed. She took a breath and stopped her pacing, resting her palm on her forehead and felt it to be too warm before she made her way towards the cabin door. She shouldn't have asked the question, it was becoming overwhelming way to quickly. "I don't know, Shepard. I gotta go. I needa think about this shit."

Shepard could only sigh heavily, looking at her before wiping his bloody nose again, wincing upon the contact but making no sound of pain. "Take all the time you need. And for what it's worth I'm sorry for pulling that scene on you. I thought it would have been nice I guess—innocent. You know like back in grade school when you'd pass the kid you liked a message with a simple yes or no option? It made the relationship between both people solid and clear."

The biotic stopped in the doorway and looked over her shoulder at him with a slight saddened stare, "No…I don't know what it's like."

Shepard covered his eyes, mentally cursing his poor choice of imagery. "You damn idiot, Shepard. You God damned fucking idiot."

Jack clenched her jaw before turning to leave out of the cabin, a painful silence being the only thing left behind for Shepard to have of her.

xxxxxxx

The biotic planted her back roughly against the elevator's far wall, letting a small growl escape the confines of her throat. "What the fuck were you thinking asking him somethin' like that? And what the hell was HE thinking? I ain't no thing to be had."

Jack bit her lower lip hard as she instantly reconsidered the statement, "…but if you didn't want to be had then why the fuck do you want to be," she gulped, "…his." She was starting to get nervous about the whole situation she had just put herself in. Being someone's girl meant being tied down, it meant that if shit ever hit the fan again there would be no clean escape...just like what happened with Murtagh. But then again…she hadn't felt like running as of late. There was no urge to pack up whatever sparse belongings she had and get the hell out. She wanted to stay in. She wanted to be with Shepard.

The elevator doors opened to deck three. Jack stormed out of the lift's confines, ignoring both the frightened stares and the tentative 'hellos' the Normandy's braver crew members managed. Instead of responding to their words, she stormed into the ships' portside observation room only to find London sitting quietly on her couch and reading what appeared to be one of Kasumi's old books.

Both women gave each other a look over in silence almost as if measuring each other up. Jack had no idea why she came to the observation out of all places but she was there and there was no turning back so, after a minute, Jack released an aggravated and rather large exhale before plopping down on the couch as far from the sniper as the furniture allowed.

The women sat with each other in silence for an hour before Jack finally turned to look at London, a woman who could obviously sense that something was upsetting or unnerving the biotic but, for once in Jack's life, wasn't asking her annoying questions about it. There was just stillness and a quiet acceptance about London that Jack started to think of as refreshing. The sniper didn't probe into her thoughts or try to pick her emotions dry; she just sat and accepted the company of the crazy ex-convict with no psychiatrist 'let me help you' bullshit.

London simply returned the gaze with a firm nod. The sniper didn't know a damn thing about Jack—and she was okay with that. The ex-convict was, at the end of the day, simply herself regardless of questions or soul-searching discussions. London understood the need for silence and the need for someone to just be there and not ask questions just as much as Jack did. They had both gone through more than their fair share of experiences, and there were times when they just really didn't want to talk about it. When it was time to talk, it was time to talk.

Jack furrowed her brows in deliberation as the two women gazed at each other. Jack was not a woman of thought; she was a woman of action, so when her mind began to race at a thousand miles per minute she knew she needed to make it stop—to sort it out. Wound up in her own mind, Jack found herself resting her face into the pads of her palms as if trying to find solace in the darkness and warmth they had to offer. Her voice was tiny and barley audible when she spoke, "…I just wanna be happy for once. Whoever that holy motherfucker is up there owes me big for all the shit he's put me through. I don't wanna run no more. Why can't I just fucking stop….I," Jack tried to swallow through the dryness in her throat; "…I like it here."

The sniper brought her eyes back down to her novel and raised a brow, carefully considering each sentence before offering a slight shrug towards Jack, "So don't run. Stop."

Jack turned her head, sarcasm dripping from every letter in her sentence, "No. Shit."

London sighed as she put her book down into her lap and raised her gray eyes to meet Jack, "You're making this a lot harder than it has to be. Now I don't know what it is you're going through or even what the hell you're talking about, but in life I've found there are always going to be two options—and two options only: Do it, or don't. There's never an in-between and both choices will have consequences somewhere down the road."

The ex-convict considered London's words carefully before the sniper opened her mouth to speak again, "If you want to stay then stay. If you want to change then change, if you want to stop then stop, and if you're waiting for some holy man to shine his light down on you—then I'm telling you now you're going to be waiting a very long time. The fact is that shit happens in this universe and we make the best we can out of it and deal with the facts of life."

Jack scowled, "Don't fuckin' talk to me about makin' the best out of the shit you've been given. I've been—"

"—and yet here you are, still questioning. Bad stuff has happened and you made the best of it then, but now that something good has been thrown in your lap… you second guess it? Honestly? Take it and make it yours. Make it count."

The biotic couldn't think of anything to say, and somewhere deep in her own cynical mind she thought that just maybe this London girl was right. Jack had always rolled with the punches and gone where the wind lead her. She had made the best she could out of her life and even managed to get out in one piece; scarred—but alive. However, now that she finally had something good given to her, she found that her first instinct was to escape? What the hell kind of logic was that? The ex-convict ran over the sniper's words, "…only two options: do it or don't…if you wanna change then change, if you want to stay then stay." Jack then recalled another time weeks ago when she admitted to Shepard that she wanted to transform herself and be better than what life had made her into. The ex-convicts entire life was built around the rules she made for herself, around the feelings her gut gave her, around the burst of her shotgun, the choices of her trigger finger, and the terror of her biotics. Never once had she ever had to deal with the whims of her heart. The words repeated in her mind over and over, "Do it. Don't. Do it. Don't. Do it. Do—"

Jack's thoughts were suddenly interrupted with a child's excited voice, "London! Lon—JACK!" Teagan had burst through the doorway carrying a small satchel of paints and her body language seeping happiness, "I didn't know you were gonna visit today, Jack!"

London grinned as she casually flipped through another page in her novel, "Nice to see you too, Tee."

Jack cleared her throat, "Hey, midget. I—uh … wasn't plannin' on visiting today but something came up and I just needed to—" Jack decided not to delve into her problems with a seven year old so promptly changed the conversation, "Hey what's that ya got there?"

Teagan eyed her satchel, "Oh this? It's just some paint Kasumi had forgotten to pack in my case and—hey! Do you wanna paint with me? It'll be lots of fun!"

Jack started to feel almost instantly uncomfortable again, "I don't think so kid—"

"Aw come on! I have an extra canvas and more than enough brushes to share—and paint too! All you gotta d—"

Jack lifted her hand to stop the pleading child, "Okay God damn it. I'll try this painting crap, just no more squawking okay? Givin' me a bigger headache."

London giggled as she continued to read while Teagan zipped her mouth and nodded her head furiously. Jack took a few steps up towards the eager child who took the biotic by the hand and pulled her over to the painting station. London eyed over the odd pair with a small grin, Teagan was talking quickly and excitedly as she explained what everything at the station was. The sniper chuckled as the small child shoved a handful of brushes and a bundle of paint at the irritated but still oddly intrigued ex-convict.

London could see the annoyance in Jack's face as the biotic fumbled with the load of small objects that were thrust into her arms. But once everything had settled, London could also see the sudden serene look of concentration on Jack as she added an array of bright reds, dark crimsons, vibrant oranges, and loud yellows onto the plain white canvas. Jack's work was becoming as colorful as the ex-convicts life. It never really occurred to the sniper that painting could have ever been anything more than a hobby for Teagan given her age, but London saw just then that it was also her way of expressing herself and helping the child cope with the day to day life she had been forced to live. It was therapy, and from the look of Jack, maybe it was having the same effect. Jack didn't seem to have the same appearance of worry etched across her features as she did when she had first arrived into London's quarters.

"I think I'll leave you two for a little while to do your painting," London casually threw out into the quiet room. The woman lifted herself off the couch and made her way towards the door. "I'll be back in an hour or two okay, Tee?"

The child turned her head and nodded, "Kay…but where ya goin'?"

London genuinely smiled, "You told me to make friends so…I made one."

Teagan beamed at her older sister, "That's great! I'll be here with Jack then!"

The sniper chuckled, "Alright. Be good."

xxxxxxx

[Deck Three/ 11:30AM]

"How are you today, Mr. Gardner?"

The mess sergeant turned his attention to the lovely woman across the counter, "Well if it ain't Ms. London—I'm doing good! Just finishing up with lunch preparations right about now, but how the hell you doing, honey?"

London smiled politely at the older gentleman who was preparing up the Normandy's afternoon meal. "I'm doing very well this morning, thank you. I was just wondering if I could help you prepare lunch today—or if you needed help doing anything else?"

Gardner sniggered quietly, "What is it with the women in your family, ma'am? Are you all normally this helpful or are you just all just gluttons for punishment?"

London's smile grew with genuine interest, "What do you mean?"

"Well heck, it was not that long ago that your little sister was down here asking me if she could help make the crew breakfast! She's a great little baker that one, and was a tremendous help."

The woman gazed over the clean counter and offered a small laugh of her own, "Yes, she told me about that. She said that she had a wonderful time. I just thought that since you all have been so very kind to both of us that I could help out around the ship a little bit—or at least where I wouldn't get in the way. So," she offered a charming smile towards the mess sergeant, "could you use my help?"

The older man's cheeks warmed at the unaccustomed sight of such a beautiful woman gracing him with such a beautiful smile. "Erm…it's not necessary but if you'd like to help that would be fine all the same, Ms. London. I'll take the non-human dishes, they're a bit more difficult to make and call for specific details in preparation. You can help out by picking something at random from my list over there and preparing the food for everyone else."

London glanced over to where the Sergeant had pointed at a data pad. She took a few steps over and took it into her hands, turning on the screen and reviewing the long list of contents it held. "So that's how you decide what you make for the day? Just choose something at random?"

Gardner nodded, "Yep. Keeps things new and fresh—and leaves me not so bored when it's all over and done with."

London stopped at several choices with special markings beside the title of the course, "What are these little marks for? They look like little stars beside the name of the dish."

The mess sergeant was reviewing his dextro-animo table of food contents just for safety before creating the course, "Ah, those are favorites of the crew members— if you click on the entry it'll tell you who prefers the dish."

"…oh," the sniper had said softly to herself, clicking a few of the entries to see who had a taste for what. It was so odd reviewing the Normandy crew's favorite list of cuisines; somehow it made the squad of super soldiers seem more…normal.

She couldn't help but grin at some of the things the human crew members preferred: Grunt, though not human, seemed to have a weakness for the human way of cooking fried fish, Jacob liked the tomato soup entrée, Kasumi seemed to have ordered sushi more than a few times, Dr. Chakwas was partial to calamari, Kelly had ordered the 'chef salad specialty' several times, Shepard liked the 'thick triple bacon cheddar cheese burger', Jack had a thing for fully loaded baked potatoes with strips of any kind of red meat on top, Kenneth liked fried mushrooms, Gabby preferred the lemon chicken, and Miranda… steak?

London laughed loudly as she read through the preferred list of cuisines which in turn caused Gardner to spin around with a smile of his own, "What's so funny over there?"

"Well for one—I had no idea you military type ate this well on board, and two—Miranda prefers…steak? Is this serious?"

Gardner found himself shrugging in laughter as well, "What can I say? It's a hell of an expense, but the commander has been ridiculously good to us since he's gotten here. It's most definitely not an everyday thing though, but instead more of a 'special occasion' thing. Oh—and believe me, I was just as surprised when I found out myself about Operative Lawson. Between you and me she seems like more of a –"

"—salad eater."

The mess sergeant clapped his hands and pointed at the sniper enthusiastically, "Exactly! But it seems like the woman does like her meat."

London let what seemed to be Gardner's unintentional pun pass by and considered the menu for a moment instead. "Mr. Gardner? Would it alright if…I made this for her lunch? Just a small steak."

The mess sergeant quirked a brow, "If it's just this once I don't see why not. Your little sister made everyone a special muffin when she took over—might as well let you have your fun too. We'll get that done after we finish making everything else. Are you plannin' on giving her a little visit?"

London nodded, "Yeah, I was actually on my way to visit her before I took notice of the time and stopped here instead. Figured since it's about lunch time not only could I help you out, but maybe make both me and Ms. Lawson something to eat while I was at it."

Gardner waved her over, "Not a problem then. Let's get this stuff started, the sooner we finish the quicker we can both eat. Matter of fact…make me one of those too…"

xxxxxxx

[Miranda's Office/12:40PM]

"Jacob what do you want me say? And I'll have you know that this is hardly an appropriate discussion. It's more than awkward talking about this with you so in all honesty I'd just prefer to not speak of the matter." Miranda was pacing around the foot of her bed, arms crossed tightly and shoulders tense as she spoke towards her comrade whom was sitting against her desk.

"Oh come on Miranda it's me. We used to talk all the time about everything. Besides, I'm worried about you. You're always so stressed now!"

"It's this whole Teagan situation and with Harbin—"

"Doooon't start with that. You don't have to tell me, I was there with you through the whole thing, remember? But, in all honesty, what can we do about it right now? We've warned the council, shown the videos—and they STILL all have sticks up their butts the size of Grunt. It's a wonder any of them can even walk straight. The only thing we can do now is gather our resources and materials and prepare ourselves the best we can for one hell of a battle. Also—it's already been almost three weeks since our last suicide attempt, Miranda."

Lawson shrugged lightly dismissing the statement. "And the point would be?"

Jacob glared half heartedly, "Oh don't you do that tough girl 'I have walls' bullshit, Lawson. I know you. You haven't even tried to just relax one time! You're always Ms. Business and it's not healthy."

Miranda clenched her jaw tightly as her anger started to unravel, "Well excuse me for keeping to my responsibilities! Someone on this bloody ship has to! The rest of this crew is too damn busy with their 'relationships' and damned teenager hormones to actually get any work done."

Jacob sighed lightly as he stood up and walked over towards the ex-operative. "…you know that's not what I meant…"

Lawson held her hands out to stop the man's approach, "Then what did you mean, Jacob? Because as far as I'm concerned it just sounds like you're saying that I need to let my hair down and get laid."

"I didn't say that at all, Miranda. I'm just saying that you need to take it easy, alright? You're stressed beyond anything I've ever seen before. I know you're wonder woman, but sooner or later it's all going to catch up. Your body needs rest."

Miranda's gaze went cold, "Don't tell me what my body needs."

Jacob continued his movement towards the protesting woman until he stood directly in front of her, cornering Lawson against the bed and his own body. "I think it needs a hug," he said innocently.

Miranda rolled her eyes, trying not to grin at his friendly and slightly moronic gesture. "God, you're still an idiot. I see not even time was able to change that, hmm Jacob?"

Jacob grinned happily as he noticed a slight shift in Miranda's mood, "Nope. So you gonna give this idiot and your closest friend a hug or what?"

Miranda finally released a small chuckle, "Closest friend? Oh please don't flatter yourself." No matter what she protested, Jacob was right. Lawson was a woman with no other acquaintances besides those aboard the Normandy and a few outside information dealers she contacted when needed. And despite their rocky relationship, Jacob had always been a decent man to her. So, not counting her sister Oriana, he was the closest thing to a friend she really ever had.

The slight hiss of Miranda's door opening was oblivious to the pair as they shared in a hug. Miranda closed her eyes and placed her head on the specialist's shoulder as Jacob wrapped his arms around Lawson's small waist, his voice soft and kind as he spoke, "I just want you to be happy, Miranda. That will be one thing that most definitely never changes about me."

When Miranda finally opened her eyes it was only to find a silent London staring down at the ground while holding two trays of food. "…London?" she called out quietly, causing Jacob to release his hold on Miranda and turn around to view the other woman.

"I…" The sniper's cheeks grew warm as she stared down onto what Gardner called 'the two most perfect steaks and grilled vegetables he had ever seen'. London had trained herself to react to situations quickly and with ease, so it was no surprise when she put on a friendly and rather casual demeanor—raising the trays up to the two crew members with a false smile. "I really didn't want to interrupt—and I'm so sorry I did. I just heard that you two were in here and thought I'd bring lunch over. So," she set the trays down quickly onto the desk, "here it is. I…I hope you two enjoy."

Jacob smiled happily, "Aw that's really nice of you—holy hell is that steak! Okay, what's the occasion?"

London gave him a half-hearted grin before turning to leave, "No occasion, I guess it's just steak day."

Jacob pumped his arm once with enthusiasm before taking a seat at Lawson's desk and ripping into the carefully prepared meal. "That's fiiiine by me. Damn this smells good."

Miranda felt as if her feet were suddenly heavy, "…we don't have steak days—London won't you join us for lunch?"

London turned around and gave a simple refusal by shaking her head casually before exiting the office, "I'm not hungry, but thank you."

Jacob turned towards Miranda to see what the problem was, "Hey come eat! It's hot off the grill and damn good. You would have thought Gardner put extra TLC into this. He must be in a reaaaaally good mood."

Miranda quietly took her seat at her desk and observed the carefully created meal. It didn't look like something Gardner would make at all, everything was too neat and to well presented; there was simply too much thought put into the arrangement of the food.

Before Miranda could respond to Jacob's bickering, he crashed through Lawson's train of thought and ruined the presentation on her platter by reaching his arms over to cut the steak for the operative in an attempt to get her eating. "Eat something, Miri."

xxxxxxx

[Portside Observation/2pm]

London was quick to move down the hallway and towards her quarters, keeping up her usual façade of happiness as she gave polite hellos and considerate nods as she passed by several Normandy crew members. When she had finally reached her door her eyebrow rose in confusion as she heard Jack and Teagan practically yelling within the observation room. The portside door opened to reveal the older biotic giving Teagan a seminar of some sort.

"Okay kid, when you pull some really fuckin' amazing biotic display that completely maims and obliterates your target, you gotta strike a pose and yell, 'Who's the badass biotic now, bitch!' Okay—you try."

Teagan struck a very non-threatening pose, "Who's the—"

"—no, midget, you gotta put more 'tude into it." The ex-convict attempted to fix the little biotic's posture. "Also ya' gotta sound more pissy. So really lay it on, okay?"

Teagan relaxed her posture as a quizzical eyebrow rose, "…p-pissy?"

"Angry. Sound more angry."

"Oh! Okay...let me try again…" The little girl struck another pose that was reminiscent of an idiotic galactic rap artist. "WHO'S THE BADA—"

"TEAGAN… don't you dare say it." London was leaning against the inside of the door's frame, arms crossed, and a very displeased look etched across her face.

The child biotic froze for a moment before instantly lowering her arms and standing up straight. Jack groaned in disappointed, "Aw come'on! She was a total badass! Ain't no one ever gonna fuck with her now!"

London rubbed her eyes and exhaled heavily before looking onto Teagan's new 'teacher'. "Jack…what, in the name of all that's good, are you instructing her in?"

"You know, important stuff like teachin' the kid to talk the walk."

London grunt lightly, "Jack I never taught her to walk the walk in the first place!"

Jack scoffed lightly, "Ah don't worry I just covered that for you. This shit is important—especially with her goin' off to that damn school. But I guess that's enough for now." The older biotic turned her attention towards the child, "Damn good job small fry, I'll see ya tomorrow at the squid he—," Jack sucked in her breath and rolled her eyes in annoyance, making the attempt at actually saying the Justicar's name, "…Samara's room."

Teagan nodded happily as Jack left their quarters and towards the elevator again. London eyeballed her little sister who could only timidly stare back and release a nervous giggle. "H-Hi London…"

xxxxxxx

[Commander's Cabin/5:30PM]

Jack was now standing behind Shepard's closed door and had given herself all afternoon to really think about Shepard's 'proposal'. The small chat with London as well as hanging out with Teagan had actually made the decision easier to make; much to Jack's surprise. The older biotic would watch the child from time to time, contemplating why Teagan made decisions the way she did. Everything was so simple from a child's prospective: if it was something that makes you happy then just keep doing it. So Jack, imitating that mind-frame, began to plug in her own circumstances. What did she love doing? "Shooting things and crackin' skulls." Why did she do it? "It makes me feel all warm inside." Something else clicked in her head. "If I could do this for the rest of my life there ain't no one else I'd rather kick ass with than Shepard." It was all suddenly so simple after that. The only good things she had ever experienced in her life all happened when Shepard was around:

Escape from cryo. Saved by Shepard.

Get to talk about herself freely. Listened to by Shepard.

Blow up Pragia. Helped by Shepard.

Call the Illusive Man a fuckhead. Encouraged by Shepard.

Help destroy the Human Reaper and save the 'verse. Led into battle by Shepard.

Get a new Shotgun that she didn't have to steal. Gift from Shepard.

Sleep without nightmares…next to Shepard.

Save and meet the biotic child …because of Shepard.

Commander John Shepard had incorporated and gently woven himself into Jack's life so tightly it had become hard to think of a time when the commander wasn't around. As she considered her options it became increasingly obvious that the choice had been made for her by her a long time ago, and it impressed her to no end that Shepard knew all he needed was the patience, and that all she needed was the time to figure it out on her own. Maybe he wasn't as dumb as he looked after all.

The corner of Jack's lip lifted into a smirk as two simple words floated effortlessly into her mind, "Do it."

The decision was made.

xxxxxxx

John looked miserable when Jack had walked in. Although the swelling on his nose had gone down a considerable amount since that morning, he was still slumped over as he rested his elbows on his knees in deep thought, an expression glued on this face that easily passed as a mix between tired, worried, upset, and nervous.

Jack slowly made her way up towards the commander till she stood in front of his slumped form and placed a hand gently on the back of his head, her thumb caressing the scalp beneath with a firm assurance. Shepard didn't bother to look up and meet her gaze. Instead, he enfolded his arms around her midsection and placed his cheek upon the flat of her stomach, holding the slender woman to himself in a vulnerable yet intimate embrace. The biotic merely gazed upon the top of his head for several moments, carefully pondering her next movement before finally and very softly wrapping her slender forearms around John's head and neck, cradling the commander with a gentleness that no one could ever expect from a woman like Jack.

"I'm sorry, Jack...I was an idiot to try and pull something like that on you. I was impulsive, and stupid, and—"

"Ask me again…"

John carefully pulled himself back to finally look upon the complicated and very beautiful woman he had fallen in love with. He didn't say anything, but his eyes betrayed his confusion, causing the biotic to carefully restate herself, "…I want you to ask me again. Ask me… what you asked this morning."

Shepard felt his heart beat faster as he stared into the incredibly sincere looking Jack. He swallowed the lump in his throat and forced his lips to part, "…Jack?"

"...Mm?"

The commander inhaled deeply before taking the biotics' hands from his shoulders and instead holding them firmly. His voice was low, steady, and full of a warmth Jack had never experienced with any other man. "I have faced some truly unimaginable things in my life with little fear. I am not a man to be conquered, and I am not a man so easily taken. But…when I see you, Jack? My stomach turns to knots and I feel as if my knees are about to give way to the ground. You are an impressive woman by all standards and I would be the happiest man in this universe if you gave me the pleasure in being mine, and allowing me the honor to be yours in return."

Jack rolled her eyes, grinning softly as leaned into Shepard, placing light kisses on his lips in between her words. "You…are such…a chump. Coulda' just said, 'be my girl'."

Shepard tilted his head, a grin of his own appearing as their lips once again drew close, "So…is that a yes?"

Jack stopped centimeters from John's lips, a full smile on face as she grabbed Shepard by his collar and pulled him up to his feet. Fabric still in hand, the biotic dragged him over to the bed they had shared so many nights before and released him. The slender woman slid off the pair of boots she had worn that day then proceeded to slowly unbutton and remove her pants and black tank-top. Jack's movements were different to Shepard. Usually when they even came remotely close to becoming intimate, Jack would freeze or remove herself from the company of Shepard completely. But suddenly where once there was hesitation, there was now purpose; where there was once fear, there was now confidence.

The biotic slowly sat at the edge of the bed and slid herself backwards until she was at its center and laying flat on her back, her voice calm and low as she replied, "…what do you think?" Shepard gazed over his woman with admiration. Jack was stunning in her simple black bra and laced black panties. Her body was long and slender, her skin smooth and, though covered in scars light and deep alike, was more than enough motivation for Shepard to remove his own shirt, shoes, and pants to crawl slowly onto the bed; the need to feel such a wondrous woman deafening in his mind.

Shepard kissed Jack briefly before he slid his lips over her chin, sliding his lean but muscular body downward as he strategically placed butterfly kisses and sucked softly at her throat, causing Jack to arch her back and gasp at the sensation of his mouth on her skin. The commander then slid his hands up her arms slowly, lacing his fingers with hers as John brought his face up to meet the half lidded biotic. "…tell me what you want," he asked, not wanting to push her past any limitations she still might have.

Jack brought the back of her hand to gently caress John's cheek before letting it wander down his strong neck, across the thick collar bone, and eventually flipping her hand over, the warm padding of her palm landing in between the commander's pectoral muscles and pressing into the spot over his heart. "…I want normal. Just normal. You n' me, okay?" There had been many sexual encounters in Jack's life—not all so pleasant. Either way Jack had found herself entering into all sorts of experiences. She had the wild nights, the kinky nights, nights that had scared her, scarred her, that bored her, but never someone to share normalcy with—and above everything else… normal is what she wanted.

Shepard smiled gently at the woman beneath him. Jack had worn a bra that hooked in the front. Shepard placed his fingers onto the little latch and upon seeing permission in Jack's eyes to continue, he unclasped the hook and helped the biotic to rid herself of the small piece of clothing. John leaned in, kissing her chin before continuing to descend and sliding his lips over the mound of her breasts. Jack gave a soft groan as small electric shocks seemed to exude from his touch, making her body jerk pleasurably in response.

The commander took his time going over her mapped torso, tasting and viewing her wholly, refusing to miss an inch of Jack's sweet and salty skin. John began to kiss the lower half of her flattened tummy, releasing her hands in order to begin caressing her body eagerly but gently. Jack could feel her body growing feverish at his touch, each caress from those callused hands filling her with a heat and passion that she had never quite experienced before. His lips were soft, his tongue so agile, warm, and wet. Jack wanted him to continue.

Whether it was reading her mind or her body, Shepard instinctively held her securely by her waist, gripping her panties firmly and sliding them off Jack's long legs before leaning his head in between her thighs, his tongue pressing down against her bundle firmly, stroking her in one agonizingly long lick. His eyes closed with pleasure as he groaned, adding small vibrations into the delicate heat of Jack, the sweet scent of her filling his nose. Jack released a scream, causing John to quiver and his manhood to harden in anticipation as he devoured her sweetness, continuing until Jack could stand no more and had received her fill. John stayed until her last moan before working his way back up, making sure to keep contact between his form and hers, sliding himself upward until his head hovered above Jack's. John observed her: Jack's entire face and body was slightly damp from his ministrations; her chest was heaving heavily and the gleam of sweat on her skin only seemed to accentuate her beautiful body.

Shepard smiled gently onto his love, leaning in to offer soft kisses onto her forehead, cheeks, and the tip of her nose. "…Are you still with me?" he asked in tender concern. John had known about Jack's dreams. He knew about the rapes and molestation's the biotic had endured, and wanted to make sure she didn't drift of into that time but instead stay with him where she would be safe and loved.

Jack reached her arms around Shepard's neck, pulling him down almost urgently into a heated kiss. She could taste herself on his lips causing her to moan quietly into his mouth, her legs spreading a little wider to accommodate Shepard's muscular form more comfortably. "…I'm here." Her hands trailed down his back, fingernails digging into the tanned skin until they reached the rim of John's boxers. Jack slid the tips of her fingers in and wiggled her body underneath his, allowing the woman more room in pulling his shorts down. Shepard let the clothing piece fall down his thighs and to his knees, lifting his legs then eventually kicking the item off into a small, haphazard pile on the floor.

Shepard kissed her lips again, his form bringing itself down onto the biotic slightly. Jack could feel the length of his manhood against her mound and she groaned, instinctively lifting to hips to tease the already erect member. John hissed softly and bit his lower lip, glancing over Jack with a cautious but loving gaze. "Jack," he managed to stay breathily, "…are you sure this is what you want?" Jack could only nod, her hips lifting again to tease her own entry way with the length of Shepard's shaft.

The moment was broken only briefly as Shepard reached over to retrieve a condom from his night table close by. Once unwrapped, he quickly applied the object before swallowing any doubt he might have had and slowly reached down to take his organ into his hand, placing the tip of his member at Jack's entry way, then taking a small inhale before pushing himself in. Jack gasped loudly, shifting herself underneath the man's weight then lifting her head to examine the connection between the two bodies. She could feel her tunnel clench and release, trying to find a happy medium to accommodate Shepard. "God Shepard," she managed to breathe out finally, dropping her head back onto the mattress and offering a groan.

John didn't dare thrust. With as much willpower as he could muster the Commander kept still, waiting until Jack seemed to have adjusted and readied herself, "Are you okay?" he asked softly, trying his damndest to not buck straight into her sleeve. The biotic bit her lower lip hard, nodding her head as the palms of her hands caressed the length of Shepard's toned back.

Shepard took that as his cue to continue. Slowly he buried the length of his shaft into the heat of Jack's mound, brought almost all of its entirety out, then pumped it back in, eliciting a throaty moan from his partner and an even lower groan from himself. Jack felt wonderful against his length, wet and hot, tightly grasping and then hesitantly and unbearably slow at releasing. This woman was driving Shepard crazy with lust as he thrust into her.

The biotic was lightly panting when Shepard gazed deeply into her eyes and gave his best smile, "You and Me, Jack," he reassured in a heavy voice, making sure to keep the biotic with him in the very moment they were sharing. The ex-convict nodded furiously, bringing Shepard down to crush their lips together, silently approving of her commander again as Shepard began to move faster, causing Jack's body to bounce beneath him. John had to bring his hand up to grasp the top of her shoulder gently. It wouldn't be good after all if the ex-convict slipped off the bed or hit her head on the headboard.

Jack let out adoring shrieks and moans as she took the commander in fully, giving her complete and utter trust to him as he took control over her lithe body, something she did not relinquish lightly. The biotic pushed hard against his loins, shifting her hips and systematically joining her pelvis with his, causing the commander to groan in satisfaction.

The ex-convict moaned as she felt her body begin to draw in, "Sh—Joh—I'm…I—" Shepard felt her tightening furiously around his manhood and began to move in earnest, wrapping his arms tightly around the woman he loved and bringing her up against his body, catching his lips to hers. "Let me feel you," John said, wanting to feel his prize liquefy over him. Jack let out a scream and stiffened as Shepard began to once again thrust quickly into her tight sleeve. The pressure was amazing before her juices finally hit him. The commander also stilled, his body quivering slightly as her surge burst over him, groaning loudly as her tightness enveloped his organ and refused to let up, his own orgasm beginning to come to fruition. Jack suddenly slammed her hips once more in good graces, burying the commander even deeper into her tightness. It was enough to drive him over the edge, the pressure had built inside of him and he could no longer hold it as he allowed himself release.

Shepard gently lowered himself onto Jack, tasting her lips lightly one last time before attempting to move himself off. The biotic would have none of it. Her legs wrapped tightly around Shepard's waist forcing him to stay on top of her just a little bit longer, his member soft but still inside her and still connecting them. John placed his head on top of Jack's heart, listening as it pounded steadily beneath the inked skin.

Moments passed in blissful silence before John felt it best to slide off her body and onto his back. Jack, not wanting to stay disconnected for long, slid into his arms afterwards to find comfort in the warmth and strength they had to offer.

John chuckled lightly, "…that was definitely a yes."

Jack grinned but rolled her eyes anyways, "Fuckin' clueless, I swear."

[End 15: Whims of the Heart]

[[ Well there it was folks! The thing I've dreaded writing for the longest of times. I really really really really really really want to know what you thought about the last scene. It's my first time writing anything of the sort and I wanted it to be sensual but tastefully done. Did I achieve that, or did I just suck face and epic fail?

LEMME KNOW. Hit the review button and let me have it. ]]