… meanwhile in the Ileenium system…

"That's not an explanation," said Freya in that soft, level voice that made it clear she'd rather be yelling it.

"Well, I can't explain it better. Something just changed. Seeing him like that changed it. It's pretty hard to come to terms with the idea that people that have force powers have bad days too…" I said, forcing myself not to shrug. Something told me Freya would not like that.

"Also forget Kylo Ren for the moment. What the hell do you mean you'll do anything to keep Hux alive? Hux? The guy that makes you end calls with I hate you…?" said Freya sounding somehow even more upset than before.

"Oh come on, that makes perfect sense…" I said, getting exasperated myself. Grandma begun openly laughing.

"You have no clue how to treat the bad guys, do you?" said Freya in her I'm-the-only-adult-for-miles-around-aren't-I tone. I made a face and proceeded to look up at the stars again.

"Oh please. I spent months around the bad guys. I'm about the best authority on how to treat them the resistance has…"

… aboard the Finalizer…

"Hey Phasma… want some hot chocolate…?"

"What?"

"I know. I'm surprised too," I said, looking at the drink dispenser in disbelief, hoping this wasn't a trick the machine played on me just to help the First Order with its evil quota's. Because right now I couldn't imagine anything as evil as denying me access to chocolate – especially after getting my hopes up like this.

"Is this another rouse to get me to take my helmet off…?" she asked suspiciously.

"Yes. It's also very, very good," I said with a dreamy smile after taking that first sip. "Seriously, you should get some. You seem to be having a pretty bad day. Everyone who takes this First Order thing seriously is having one," I said, looking at the dispenser thoughtfully.

"Whatever you just thought of doing, you probably shouldn't…" she said sounding genuinely worried. Whatever the expression on my face was she didn't like the look of it.

"Right. So I'll just go… You know, so you can take your helmet off in peace."

"Stay."

"What?" I said, blinking in surprise.

"You know you want to," she said as she reached for her helmet. "And I know what the alternative is, so I'd very much prefer if you stayed…"

"I wasn't…" I protested. And stopped once I realized she was actually doing it. After weeks of ignoring my not-so-subtle hints she actually took her helmet off as though it was no big deal. "See? Was that so hard…?" I grinned.

She just grabbed the cup from my hand and walked off in the direction of the nearest chair ignoring the "Hey, that one was mine," I called after her. So I just made myself another cup and went over to join her. Since she made it so clear she preferred it to me going with the plan A.

"I wasn't going to…" I began as I sat down.

"Yes you were."

"Well… yes. I was. What do you care…?" I smiled. "It's not like you'd really hate to see me thrown out of the airlock for pissing him off once too often. And please don't tell me it's because he's having a bad day. He deserves it. He deserves just years and years of really bad days."

"You really hate him," she said with what was almost a smile. Whatever the joke was, I wasn't getting it.

"I'd really hate you too, but you just made it very hard. What's up with you people going all human on me today? First it's Kylo Ren and now you… What? Why are you smiling?" I frowned.

"Not Darth Fanboy…?" she replied. "Not Grandpa Issues? What – did you run out of nicknames?"

"Never. But… I think something happened to my attitude when he bled all over me. Never knew that was a thing, but apparently it is. People are never more human than when you have to get their blood out of your favorite shirt…" I shrugged. And with smile that was probably bit on the wicked side I added "Maybe I should try to…"

"No, you really shouldn't," said Phasma stopping me before I could properly develop the evil plan that just occurred to me. "Drink your chocolate."

I did. That was one order I would never disobey, after all…

"So this is… nice. We should do this more often. Unless you're thinking I won't live long enough. Which you clearly do," I said, since her expression could only be described as skeptical. "Alright, what did he tell you? How exactly did I cross the line? I didn't even threaten him. The opposite, actually…"

"Just drink your chocolate," repeated Phasma.

"You know that when you say it like that it kind of makes me think it might be my last cup ever, right…?"

She didn't bother saying it again, just gave me a look. I shut up and drank my chocolate. "I won't tell anyone, by the way. Your secret's safe with me and all that."

"It's not a secret," she said only.

I smiled and managed not to say anything to ruin the mood for once. Just sat there and drank my chocolate. What with watching over an unconscious space wizard or further annoying a superior officer simply by existing, this did seem to be the best possible use of my time.

… in the Ileenium system…

"So are you going to explain the logic behind that completely mad plan or do we just guess…?" said Freya, ending my short-lived reminiscence. She seemed all kinds of furious, though it took me a second to remember what it was about.

"Is this still about Hux…?" I said, turning to grandma for confirmation.

"Everything seems to be about him, thorny. Even I could do with some justification," she said, though her voice sounded plenty amused. "If you have one, that is."

"It's been weeks. I needed to hate someone. Couldn't be Phasma – I could tell she didn't find me anywhere as annoying as she let on. Couldn't be Snoke because he might as well not be real for all we know… it's all very smoke and mirrors in that huge creepy room, you know. And then there's…"

"Right," said Freya, cutting my explanation short. "There's Ben and we're not allowed to give him rude nicknames anymore."

"Yes," I said, giving her a warning look just in case she felt like adding a rude nickname for old times' sake. She only shook her head at my reaction.

"So you hate Hux because… Oh wait, this is just another manifestation of your problem with authorities, isn't it? You probably didn't even notice he was evil, you just didn't like he was giving you orders," said Freya, sounding like she was barely resisting a facepalm.

"You might have been right about that, way back when," I admitted. "But that changed. I started paying attention after the destruction of Starkiller. Believe it or not I did manage to pick up on the fact that there's something very wrong with him. And I'm saying that which means he's probably a legitimate sociopath…"

"After the destruction of Starkiller," said Freya, sounding almost horrified. It seemed nothing I said had the power to get her to calm down and let me watch the stars in peace.

"Well I haven't seen him much on the base. Probably by design… And I was so busy all the time," I said, sounding just a little whiny. I might not bring this up a whole lot, but I was used to putting in twenty-five hour workdays while being the First Order's fixer. "It was only when we were running that we got any quality time. And that was after Elsa, so… you know… I was ready to get in someone's face about that as it was…"

"That better not be your way of saying you picked him randomly."

"I didn't pick him randomly," I said with a chuckle. "It was inevitable. I might have forgotten he existed for a few weeks there…"

I stopped talking, because it was starting to look that whatever comes out of Freya next will be in the form of a growl. And grandma was laughing again. Well, at least she wasn't talking about the force…

"You are unbelievable, you know," said Freya, sounding genuinely exhausted by this conversation. "And you actually made me see things from point of view of a First Order general, so thanks for that…"

"She said I'm unbelievable," I told grandma in the it's-meant-to-be-overheard whisper. "I don't think she knows I'll be taking it as a compliment."

"Have I told you how glad I am we got you back from the First Order…?" replied grandma with a smile.

"Not since yesterday, no…"

"Nowhere near as happy as the First Order is…" begun Freya. I punched her softly in the shoulder, forcing her to cut it off right there.

"You know I'm going back to First Order, right? They have something I want…"

"That sounded like you meant it to make sense. In which case you failed. Miserably. You better start explaining," said Freya.

I was happy to oblige. Something told me I'll just be adding to her headache by doing so – and over the last hour she managed to remind me just how much fun I used to have doing it, way back when, before we had war to fight and enemies with planet-destroying capabilities to worry about.