Chapter Twelve:
While walking to his master's chambers, Merlin could've sworn he heard a voice, whispering 'Emrys has awoken.' He'd been hearing it a lot since the battle with Morgana.
Morgana.
Why didn't he help her when she needed someone? Why didn't he tell her when she felt alone? Why did he poison her, without telling her the reason why? Why did he let Morgause take her? Why?
For the first time, he actually recalled the battle. She looked so hurt, so betrayed, when she learnt of his magic. Then, after Morgana shot magic at him, he started a ritual. In all honesty, he wasn't exactly sure what happened during that time. He had never even heard about the ritual, and definitely didn't know how to perform it. It was as if he was just carrying out the instructions given to him. But given by who?
He had no clue.
It felt like a presence gave him the instructions. A warm, but all-powerful presence. He only returned to full consciousness after the ritual was over, and the events that transpired afterwards were not pleasant.
But ever since then, he felt more powerful. Like he unlocked some potential he never knew he had.
'Emrys has awoken.'
There it was again, though this time, it sounded a bit louder, a bit closer. But only a small amount. He could tell that the voice was still a distance away.
Reaching Arthur's room, the warlock twisted the door handle, letting himself in. Just as he expected, all the Roundtable members were already there, seated. Oddly enough, or maybe not, the moment he entered, Arthur ordered the guards to stand post much further away from the door, and then locked the doors leading into his room.
Everyone had somber faces. The only thing he could guess was that they told Gwen about his past, and she wanted him banished, but Gwen wouldn't do that. They were best friends, after all!
Arthur was first to break the tense, and awkward, silence.
"Merlin. Don't you think it's odd that Morgana just vanished from the castle?"
He had hidden Morgana's corpse with a spell, until he was able to take her to the Lake of Avalon, where he burned the body. But Arthur didn't need to know that.
Rolling his eyes, Merlin responded, "Morgana was a witch, she could teleport herself out."
"Was?" Arthur asked, narrowing his eyes inquisitively.
"Was what?"
Standing up, the king went to stand directly in front of his manservant, forcing him to look him in the eye.
"You said Morgana was a witch. It's not like she's dead... Is it?"
Merlin shuffled his feet uncomfortably, shifting his eyes away from his master's.
"How would I know?" he choked out.
"Well, you did watch her die, so if anyone knows if she's dead, it would be you."
It was surprising how quickly Merlin's face drained of colour.
"Wha-what are you talking about?"
Gwen, being more direct, gently said, "We saw everything."
Fear laced his voice. "Everything?"
"Everything." she replied, confirming Merlin's worst fears.
Well, this sucks.
Suddenly, strong arms held Merlin's shoulders in a grip that could rival a vice. Reluctantly looking at his friend, the servant saw Arthur's face suddenly filled with fury.
"Everything, as in: Your confession of love to Morgana, some kind of weird ritual, and you being a sorcerer!" he spat. His anger, which he suppressed until now, burst out of him. He didn't even realise just how angry the whole situation made him.
Impossibly, Merlin's face got even paler. His eyes bulged, and his breathing erratic. In a few moments though, his breathing evened out, his eyes went back to their regular places inside his sockets, and Merlin's face turned stony. He twisted his way out of Arthur's grip, and expressionlessly said, "Kill me if you want, but I won't apologise."
All the people in the room gaped at their friend's readiness to die. Did he want to die?
Gwaine shot up, glaring at the king.
"No! You will not be getting killed. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever."
A laugh escaped Merlin, hollow and humourless.
"I have so many enemies, that I would be more shocked if I died peacefully, rather than being murdered."
Hearing that made everyone uneasy. Just what did Merlin do in his spare time? Lead assassins on a wild goose chase, for the fun of it?
Gwen had made her way over to Arthur, and placed a hand on his shoulder, calming him down.
"Look, Merlin, Arthur promised to hear you out."
"Where am I supposed to start?"
"At the beginning, obviously. Who starts a story in the middle?" mocked Arthur. Really, he needed to hear the story from the beginning because no-one answered any more of his questions after the discussion.
Merlin slumped down into a chair, but before he started his tale, he asked, "Does Gwen know about my past?"
"What past?"
Hearing the confusion in her voice, Merlin just said, "I'll take that as a no."
And so he began, without leaving any parts out, or changing them to protect himself.
"A few hours after I was born, my mom and I were in our house, and the fire was dying. Since it was the middle of winter, and well into the night, Mother couldn't get any more firewood. Then, at least this is what she tells me, my eyes turned golden, and the fire grew once more, burning on nothing but ash throughout the night. This was the first time I ever used magic."
"That young?" Surprisingly enough, it was Gaius that asked the question all of them were thinking.
"Yes. Now let me talk," he chastised. "Anyways, I did little things like lighting fires, levitating objects, healing scrapes and bruises, and making plants grow. That lasted until I turned seven. Of course, until then, my powers grew, so I was able to work with larger stuff. I could levitate heavier objects, heal shallow cuts, and help make trees grow.
But that day when I turned seven, my powers started growing faster and faster. If I was really tired or in an emotional state, the slightest thing would release my magic. My mother tried to find some druids to take me in, but she couldn't find any.
Over time, I was able to gain control over both my magic and my emotions. Using magic prevented it from randomly escaping and doing whatever it pleased, whether I was awake or asleep.
I had no friends, everyone thought I was a freak, and called me a bastard because I had no father. They didn't know I had magic, just that weird things happened around me. They shoved me around, pushed me into mud, but nothing drastic. That was, until I was about eight years old.
The leader of the gang had just gotten yelled at by his parents for nearly burning their house down. I think he deserved it. Either way, when he saw me that day, he started hitting me. Punches, slaps, kicks. I was about to pass out, or accidentally let my magic loose, when Will came.
He had never taken part of the name-calling, but he never talked to me either. He preferred to stay out of it. But when he saw what they were doing, he was disgusted. Since his father was a knight, he knew how to fight pretty well, and when they all refused to stop hitting me, he made them stop.
Will took all of them on at once, taking them down, before dragging me to my house. My mother was so worried when she saw me. It took me a few weeks to heal from that, speeded up by my innate magic.
The boys ended up having to work the fields for an extra hour each day for the next month, for what they did to me. They hated it.
Every day, Will would come by to make sure I was healing all right. We became best friends, and each other's only friend. Will was a recluse, like me, and never tried to make any friends. We were inseparable.
A few years passed, and nothing important happened. The kids decided that as long as they didn't hurt me too bad, they wouldn't get punished. They still got punished for doing other stupid things.
When we were twelve, we were in the forest, gathering herbs for my mother to use. The two of us were very accident prone, and got hurt a lot. That made it easier to keep my mother from knowing about what the kids did to me. Sometimes, Will got beat up too.
So, we were in the forest, when Will saw a creek. There were a few rocks we could jump across to get to the other side, where there were lots of herbs. I told him it was dangerous, and that he shouldn't do it, but he didn't listen, and ended up slipping on one of the rocks and fell in. He was going downstream so quick, that I didn't have time to think about what to do. Instinctively, I made some branches grow and swoop Will up from the water.
He was spluttering and coughing up a bit of water, but was otherwise unharmed. I thought he might've been too confused to figure out what happened, but I was wrong.
When he realised I had magic, he thought it was the coolest thing ever, and that it would make us even better pranksters than we already were. We caused so much trouble, but we never got caught.
We talked about my magic, and there were absolutely no secrets between us. So when I turned fourteen, and my mother suggested I enlist in Arnid's army, he was the first to know. His father died the year prior, fighting for King Cenred. He was one-hundred percent against the idea of me joining an army, but when I told him it was the only way Mother would survive the winter and the following years, he accepted the idea.
Lord Arnid's army wasn't great. Most of them were there to make money, like me, and didn't care about doing well. Training was easy, and I mastered most of the weapons within the year. Of course, the sword, being heavy, took longer to master. That extra attention on the sword is what really caused Arnid to want to hire me as an assassin.
I was called to the throne room, and no-one but me and him were there. He proposed a deal to me: Train to become the royal assassin, become the royal assassin, get paid the same amount as if I were still in the army, and when I actually take the role of assassin, every successful mission gives me and Mother a bonus.
Sure, I wanted to immediately reject the offer, but I wasn't that stupid. If I rejected the offer, I would probably be killed and my mother wouldn't get any money. If I took the offer, I learn some valuable skills, and make a decent amount of money. I had no friends that would realise I disappeared. Even though I despised the very idea of killing, I accepted.
Arnid and I became pretty close. I learned most of his secrets, but I kept mine close to my chest. He thought of it as a good thing that I didn't let others learn much about me. It would make me better at staying under the radar.
Since I had free reign of the castle, I went to the library whenever I wasn't practicing or sleeping. One day, I stumbled across a hidden room, which was filled to the brim with books on magic. It really helped me control my magic, which was still growing.
After a year and a bit, I was finished with my training, and sent on my first field test.
I saw it as my chance to escape. My mother said that the crops have more room to grow, since they demolished some of the abandoned houses, and that I no longer needed to stay in the army.
While I was riding towards the location of my target, a group of bandits surrounded me. I noticed them, but pretended not to. They ran out of the woods, intending to kill me and take my money. I knocked them all out with my magic, stabbed the closest man, recited a spell that made him look exactly like me, stabbed my horse, made it look like there was a fight, altered the memory of the bandits to think that they killed me, just in case, and left.
I knew that Arnid would send a party to look for me, and go to my village, to make sure I wasn't there. Because of this, I lived in the forest for a year, before returning to Ealdor. My mother got a decent sum of money for my service, but when she saw me, she was so happy. I was too; we hadn't seen each other in over three years! Will and I were still as good of friends before, but not before he yelled at me for leaving him thinking I was dead for a year.
About two months later, my eighteenth birthday arrived, and my magic started growing at a rate at least double what it was growing at before. Somehow, I was able to bend time to fit my needs! We knew it was dangerous for me to stay, since Lord Arnid might find me, and my magic was getting out of control, so Mother sent me to Gaius.
I saved his life the day I met him, using magic. He figured it out instantly that I had magic. I met a dragon- yes that dragon- named Kilgharrah, who told me of a destiny: You are the Once and Future King, destined to unite the land of Albion, and restore magic back to the land. My destiny is to protect you.
I thought he was deranged from his time being kept captive, but it ended up being true. I saved your life, using magic to slow down time, and kept saving your life ever since. Most of the threats, you don't even know about.
When I saved Mordred, he called me 'Emrys.' Apparently, that is my destiny name, like how your's is 'The Once and Future King.'
Oh yeah, Balinor's my father, and I'm now a dragonlord."
He explained everything rather quickly, so everyone had to focus hard in order to catch everything he said. Occasionally, they gasped, or looked plainly confused.
After waiting a few minutes to let everything sink in, Merlin asked, "So... Any questions?"
'Emrys has awoken. Destiny is nearing fulfillment.'
The voice hadn't spoken for the whole time, and now sounded like they were close enough to be near the castle walls. It wasn't just one person talking. It sounded like a group of people whispered at once.
Arthur's question of 'what have you done since you arrived?' dragged Merlin out of his thoughts.
There was a lot that he had done, and he voiced this thought.
"Lots. I saved Gwen's father from the plague, used magic to blow wind to let the fire kill the afanc, killed Nimueh, killed the questing beast, killed the griffin, helped a druid girl escape," Merlin's eyes filled with sorrow on that one, "took on a few more sorcerers and sorceresses-"
"A druid girl? What did she escape from?" asked Percival.
For a few moments, Merlin didn't say anything. His head lowered, in an attempt to hide the few tears that trailed down his cheeks. Just when they thought he wouldn't answer, he did.
"Freya. She was captured by a bounty hunter, claiming she was cursed. He was going to sell her to the king, right to her death! I couldn't just leave her, so while he was in the tavern, I used magic to let her out, and took her to the catacombs. I fed her and cared for her for the next few days, and we fell in love."
Arthur, recognising the story, begged, "Please don't tell me I-"
He couldn't finish the sentence, it was too horrible. To think he killed a girl Merlin fell in love with!
The small nod dashed his small amount of hope. Gwen, confused, demanded, "What are you talking about?"
"We were supposed to run away together, but she didn't want to ruin my life; not that it would've been ruined. So she left her hiding place before I came back with supplies, hoping to get out without being caught. It didn't work.
She was found by the bounty hunter, and Arthur and the knights. She begged them to let her go, but Halig was already getting the cuffs ready. Before he could do anything, it turned to midnight, and Freya turned into a bastet. Arthur struck the blow that ended up killing her.
I took her to the Lake of Avalon, a place that looked like where we wanted to live."
Arthur, who had much less tact than the rest of them, interrogated, "So you decided to love Morgana instead?"
Another smack from Gwen. That was the second time this month!
"You cannot choose who you love! It's not like I wanted to fall in love with you, a prince, when there was nearly no chance of us ever being together, but it happened! We fell in love, and got our happily ever after, while Merlin's first love died at the hand of his best friend, and his second love commited suicide, after turning against all the people he cared about!"
That really got Arthur to realise how much his friend had lost. To lose just one loved one sucks, but to lose two? Wait, Will and Balinor died too!
Arthur looked at Merlin. Really looked. For the first time, he noticed the pain and fear that lurked in his eyes; it was always there, since the moment they met, only increasing with time. He noticed the way his shoulders seemed weighed down by an immense and unseen burden. He noticed the fear in his face.
For the first time, Arthur looked at the true Merlin, the one hidden behind the mask, and realised that the one he thought he knew, the cheerful and overly optimistic man, was simply that; a mask. A facade.
After many minutes of silence, Elyan's question of 'what happened in the throne room?' brought Arthur back to reality.
"I thought you saw it all?" Merlin questioned.
"Well, yeah, but what was with the fire and water and air and earth stuff?"
Sheepishly, he answered, "I'm not entirely sure. I just know that it made her magic leave her body, and the darkness to leave her soul."
Gwaine was next to ask.
"How are you not sure? You're the one that did it. You even had this deep echo that went with your voice."
"What echo?"
"I dunno. It just sounded like a deeper voice saying what you said, along with you."
"I have no idea what you're talking about. Anyways, it was like I was just doing what I was supposed to do; mindless actions. The weird thing is, I've never even heard of the ritual," he turned to his mentor, "Gaius? Do you know?"
'The prophecies are near completion. Destiny is near fulfillment.'
The physician seemed to be in deep thought, fantastic eyebrows raising every once in awhile. A minute later, he spoke, letting down all hopes for answers.
"Never have I heard about something like this happening. It is far beyond my knowledge. Perhaps someone else knows."
As if on cue, a guard knocked on the door. Groaning, Arthur called them in, before finding that they couldn't enter, as he had locked the door. Merlin got up and opened the door, after unlocking it.
Immediately, the guard stepped inside and relayed the message he was tasked with delivering.
"My lord, a group of druids have arrived, and have requested a meeting with you, as soon as possible."
Confused, he inquired, "Why?"
"They did not divulge any information, my lord. All they did say was that it was urgent, and that he wants all of you," the guard looked at every person in the room, "to be there."
"Tell them to be in the council room in thirty minutes."
"Of course, my lord." With a respectful bow, he left.
"What could this possibly be about?"
A/N: Yeah, I had a bit of trouble with this one. My own way of speaking leaks into the characters, so Merlin's 'voice' is a bit different from in the show. *Side note* Whenever I'm typing a chapter up, I indent the paragraphs. The indents disappear when I upload the document to Doc Manager.
Hope you enjoyed! Remember, I read every review, though you could probably guess that already.