Author's Note: Hi again! This has taken quite a long time to complete but finally I have new chapter for this story and I promise that I'll have the next one out soon. At least in the next two weeks.

Elena: This is definitely not abandoned, though it is taking me awhile to complete. I do plan to finish all my stories one day no matter what. ^.^ Still, thank you so much for the kind review.

To everyone who reviewed, thank you so much for your kind words. Your reviews are what inspire me to keep on working and to finish this project.

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

Chapter 7

Birds are singing and life around Camelot hums as sun makes its slow ascent up. It's on this bright and cheery note that the knights of Camelot ride into the city with their King at the lead. The stark contrast between the bright and sunny day to the sullen riders that draws the eyes of the townspeople as the King's beloved knights trot through the streets towards the castle.

Merlin is oblivious to all of it, lost in his misery. If he didn't currently have such a tight hold on his magic, he knows for certain that it would be leaking into the air creating a stormy sky fit to match Merlin's terrible mood. Mordred keeps glancing back at him offering a reassuring look and a comforting smile, but Merlin isn't having it. No amount of comfort is going to make him feel better in this moment. Not with everyone looking at them in the streets, gasping faintly as they realize that one of the knights his bound to his horse. Hushed whispers are building and Merlin cynically imagines that the citizens have already condemned Mordred in their minds.

As they ride up to the castle's entrance, the knights quickly dismounting from their horses to get into position to help the prisoner down, Merlin can't help but feel a rush of disgust for his home. It's a fleeting feeling, one that only barely flits through his mind before disappearing into the abyss that is his grief. But it was there, and Merlin worries that he may be starting to see Camelot the way that Morgana sees it: Tainted. It's a sickening thought. Merlin may hold pity for Morgana. Sympathy. Anger even. But never understanding.

Merlin shakes off his thoughts as he dismounts from his own horse, handing the reigns over to a stable boy nearby. Without saying a word to Arthur or any of the knights, Merlin stalks off into the castle. Weaving his way through familiar halls and corridors and stairways until finally he reaches his destination.

"Merlin, my boy! Whatever is the matter?" Gaius' familiar and comforting voice asks, looking up from his work to frown at Merlin with concern.

"Gaius, I don't know what to do." Merlin admits, voicing cracking with grief. Wordlessly, Merlin collapses into Gaius, clinging to his mentor and father figure and he cries helplessly.

No words are spoken between them as Gaius continues to hold his young charge, uncertain what has happened but he imagines it can't possibly be good if it's brought Merlin to such a terrible state. But, there is time for words later. For now, Gaius will allow the boy this time to let loose the emotions he always holds in so tightly.

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

Arthur wanted to stop Merlin from leaving, wanted to talk to him and explain himself. But this was neither the time nor the place for such a confrontation. And considering how volatile Merlin was back in the forest, Arthur didn't think a second attempt would go very well so soon. Turning to his knights, Arthur eyes them for a moment before focusing on Leon. "Take the prisoner to the holding cells. A trial will be held tomorrow at dawn."

"Yes, sire." Leon answers obediently, only the barest hint of reluctance in his voice as he grabs Mordred by the arm and leads him away.

Unsurprisingly, as soon as Leon and Mordred are out of sight, Gwaine turns on Arthur with anger and disapproval burning in his eyes. "What the hell was that about?! You arrested a man who not only has saved your life before, but he saved Merlin's life! How could you betray his loyalty like that?!"

"Sir Gwaine, that's enough. You should take care to remember who you're talking to." Arthur answers, keeping his voice kingly and haughty. Internally, he knows what Gwaine says is right. This is indeed a terrible way to repay a good man's loyalty. But, Arthur's pride keeps him from wilting at Gwaine's accusation and causes his anger to rise at Gwaine's insubordination.

"I damn well am not going to 'remember my place'!' Gwaine quotes snidely. "This is wrong and you know it!"

"Enough Gwaine." Elyan interrupts gently, the softer spoken knight knowing that this argument will only get worse if he allows the two stubborn men to continue. This is certainly not the place for such a fight, especially considering they are out in the courtyard in full view of the public.

Huffing angrily, Gwaine gives Elyan a cross look before storming off in a fit. Most likely heading to the training field to blow off some steam, or to the tavern to get wildly drunk as Gwaine is oft to do. Arthur blowing out a relieved breath and offers his brother-in-law a thankful smile. Dismissing the rest of his favorite knights, Arthur takes his leave. He needs time to think, somewhere he won't be interrupted or bothered by anyone's tedious questions or anger.

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

Gwen had been standing at the window of her shared room with Arthur when the knight's procession entered the courtyard. At first, she had meant to rush out and greet her beloved immediately but something held her frozen at the window. It took a moment for Gwen to place the reason, but then she saw the tension in Merlin's dismount and the uncomfortable looks all the knights were shooting the manservant. Uncertain at what could have caused such a strange scene, Gwen decided to stay and watch from distant. She read the body language of her husband and his men, focusing more of Arthur and her brother than any of the others.

It's when she sees Percival help Mordred off his horse that Gwen finally realizes what is wrong and she gasps in shock. What possibly reason could there be for having the youngest knight bound? No wonder Merlin was furious! Everyone in the castle was at least peripherally aware of the fact that Mordred and Merlin were courting. The two were painfully obvious in their interactions and the castle is prone to wild gossip. The discomfort the knights felt made more sense now to the Queen. What Gwen didn't understand is why they arrested Mordred to begin with? What changed in the two days that they were gone?

Gwen isn't one to jump to conclusions, she wants all the facts before she render an opinion. Still, a spark of frustration flares in her despite herself. Arthur told her about Merlin's past loves, confessed what he did and how it made Merlin feel and yet he still goes and does this! Gwen truly does her best to understand Arthur's difficult position as King, but she was a servant before she was royalty and she just cannot understand how Arthur could betray his friend like this again!

Hearing the sound of the door clicking open, Gwen whirls around in distress to focus on her husband's tired form. "What in the world happened out there?!"

She truly didn't mean to sound so distraught and angry at Arthur, but she feels like someone has to advocate for Mordred and to an extend Merlin as well. It breaks Gwen's heart to think of her friend losing someone else close to him. From the little she's heard, it sounds like her closest friend has gone through enough loss in his life to last a lifetime.

"Please, Guinevere, let me speak before you rip me a new one." Arthur pleads, giving his wife a hopeful look.

Gwen taps her foot impatiently but nods to show that she's listening. That seemed to be enough to get Arthur talking as her husband sighs and slumps into a nearby chair. "Mordred displayed magic in front of dozens of witnesses. I couldn't not arrest him!"

"Mordred has magic?" Gwen questions in surprise, eyes widening. She had no idea the young knight had magic! She knew of course that he was a druid before, and that Arthur had once saved Mordred as a young boy from execution. Still, she didn't think Mordred had magic of his own. "Did you know that he had magic?"

"Yes." Arthur admits quietly, "But only recently. I overheard a conversation a couple days ago. I didn't want to do anything about it, but Mordred's actions forced my hand."

"You knew he had magic and yet you didn't arrest him?" She may have been surprised to hear Mordred had magic, but she's completely shocked to know that Arthur knew about already and had done nothing. Her husband has always valued Camelot's law on magic above everything!

Well… Perhaps that wasn't entirely true. He did save Mordred as a boy after all, even though his father expressly ordered the druid's execution. And not long ago Arthur gave druids the freedom to travel through Camelot safely without persecution. There has been a number of decisions over the years that Arthur has made that are completely contradictory to his father's ban on magic.

Arthur rubs a hand over his face and nods. "Yes, I did. You didn't see it, Guinevere. He was so terrified and upset. I couldn't do that to him again."

"Mordred was?"

Arthur looks up at her suddenly in surprise, frowning faintly at Guinevere in confusion. "No, Merlin was. Mordred was trying to convince Merlin that there was nothing to worry about, but it didn't seem like Merlin believed him. And can we blame him after everything I've already taken away from him?"

Gwen softens in understanding, her angry fleeing her at seeing how torn up Arthur is about this situation. It's obvious this isn't easy for her love and that he wanted to avoid this every happening to begin with. But, what Arthur doesn't understand is that this was bound to happen someday. No one can contain their true selves forever without something cracking. Morgana is the best example of that. Gwen never truly believed that magic corrupted her mistress. Magic played a part in it, but it wasn't the cause. It was the fear and the loneliness that destroyed Morgana, twisting and ruining her as the years went by and nothing changed. It must have been awful to keep a secret like that alone. Being too afraid to share it with anyone for fear of being burnt at the stake.

And thinking about it, Merlin was awfully close to Morgana back then too. As if the two shared a secret that no one else knew. Gwen remembers a lot of shared glances and meaningful nods between the two that didn't make sense at the time. She often wonder if the two were secretly courting, but then Morgana was kidnapped and when she returned it was as if the two couldn't stand the sight of each other anymore. Gwen hadn't thought anything of it at the time, but knowing now the other things that Merlin has hidden she's starting to wonder if Merlin knew back then too that Morgana had magic.

"Arthur, have you noticed Merlin seems to be drawn to a lot of people with magic?" Gwen really didn't mean to let those words slip out, but once said she couldn't take them back and she didn't want to. Now that she's said, she really is curious what Arthur thinks because right now Gwen is quite baffled.

"I have started to notice that, yea." Arthur frowns, looking troubled. "First there was Ethan, then this girl Freya, and now Mordred. One is just an anomaly, but three? I don't know what to make of that." Her husband's brow crinkles as if he's just realizing something, "And he knew all of them had magic and he didn't care! Why didn't he care?"

Gwen didn't know the answer to that either, but she did want to share what she just realized. "I think he knew about Morgana too. Before she was taken from us and changed." Arthur's startled gaze locks with Gwen's and she blushes slightly with nerves, "I-I mean they were so close back then, you remember? I always thought Morgana and Merlin had feelings for each other, but looking back their connection seemed more like they shared a secret."

Arthur looks off distantly, seeming lost in thought. "Yea. Yea, I thought that too. Merlin seems to know everything that goes on here, even before anyone else knows." Her husband visibly shakes off his troubled thoughts and focuses on Gwen again, "Do you believe magic is evil?"

Not surprised by the sudden change in subject, Gwen seriously considers the question. Does she believe magic evil? Sometimes she does. She hated magic as much as she hated Uther for a moment after her father was killed. And over the years her opinion on magic has fluctuated depending on recent events.

"I think… I think magic is force much like a sword. It can be wielded for good, or for evil depending on the bearer. I know Camelot sees a lot more of the dark side of magic, I do remember the moments of good too. My father was able to live a little longer because a sorcerer saved his life. And even though I was arrested because of it, I will be forever grateful to whoever gave me that precious extra time with my father."

Arthur appears to be absorbing his wife's opinion, staring down at the table with a troubled expression. Gwen aches in that moment to offer her husband more support, but she knows there is nothing more that she can do now except let her husband mull things over.

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

Mordred sat silently in the holding cells beneath the castle. He could hear nothing except for the breathing of the guards and the drip of water from the ceiling to the floor. For a moment, Mordred wonders where in the world the leak is coming from but that quickly bores him. He's use to having something to do these days, a knight's day is filled with work and practice. The little time he did have off from patrols and training he would spend with Emrys.

Emrys, the Druid's single greatest hope. He never imagined that he would get so close to the mythical legend that the Druid elders would always tell them about. At first Mordred was awed by Emrys, he saw the warlock and larger than life and all powerful. As a child, Mordred believed Emrys would sweep in and fix everything and bring hope and light to the world again.

That belief was marred somewhat by Emrys' reluctant rescue attempt when Mordred was a kid. For years, Mordred resented the legend he had so loved before and felt betrayed. It was only as Mordred got older and learned more of the world and life that he began to realize: Emrys may be a legend, but he is also painfully human. It was because of Emrys' mistakes and his faults that made him the man that the world needed. Adult Mordred came to learn that they didn't need an all-powerful god to come in and with a wave of hand fix things. What the world needed was compassionate soul with a selfless spirit who could show the world the strength of forgiveness.

And that was Emrys. His lover was the strongest person Mordred knew and it's why Mordred had so much faith in the man. Not because of a legend, but because of the man he's come to know and love dearly- Faults and all.

That's why it pains Mordred dearly that Emrys has begun to lose faith in the destiny he's worked so hard for all these years. Mordred knows that his lover has been through years of pain and suffering, he's listen to Emrys' tales of losses and triumphs and Mordred more than understands that one man can only take so much loss before they crumble. Mordred just really didn't want to be the one that finally broke him.

"How are you doing, kid?"

Mordred startles from his thoughts to look at the man standing outside his cell. It surprises Mordred to see that his first visitor is Gwaine, the roguish drunkard that spent more time in the tavern than on the training field. Mordred never considered himself very close to Gwaine, the two of them were polar opposites and had very little in common other than their status as knights.

Still, Mordred appreciates any company he can get since Emrys is not answering his mental calls. "I've had better days." Mordred answers dryly.

Gwaine chuckles at that. "I'm sure you have, kid." The humor fades from Gwaine's face as the most carefree knight because strangely serious, "Try not to worry. The Princess will make the right decision. He won't hurt you."

"He may not execute me, but he could banish me or keep me imprisoned. Either way, someone is getting hurt." Mordred leans back against the dirty wall of the cell with a faint sigh. "I pray it won't come to that, but I still fear the worse."

An uncomfortable silence passes between the two of them and it's clear to Mordred that his fellow knight is unsure how to comfort Mordred in this time of distress. "Has Merlin not come yet?"

Mordred shakes his head lightly, "I doubt he will. He would not want to see me this way and I don't blame him. This already hard enough on the both of us as it is." At this point, Mordred is fairly certain the entire castle is aware of Mordred's relationship with Emrys and there is little point in trying to hide it. Not that Mordred would want to hide it. He's not ashamed of his love for Emrys and he's not going to deny what everyone already knows.

"Yea, I can understand that." Gwaine agrees, frowning sympathetically. "You know that he's going to be there for your trial, though. There is no way he's going to miss that."

"I know." Mordred answers, tipping his head back enough so he can stare out the tiny window of his cell to the courtyard. "That's what I'm afraid of."

/BREAK/BREAK/BREAK/

"O drakon, e mala soi ftengometh tesd'hup anankes! Erkheo!"

Merlin roars the words into the dark evening sky, voicing cracking with grief and raw emotions this time. It doesn't take long for his call to be answered this time around, within moments his old friend is landing beside him in the clearing.

"What has pained you so, young warlock?" Kilgarrah questions, his voice unusually gentle and kind. Perhaps he can sense this time around that Merlin is at the teetering edge of sanity.

"You were right, old friend." Merlin meekly replies, his words strained. "I couldn't change Fate's path. No matter what choices I make, there is nothing I can do to stop what is going to come. I'm going to lose everything."

Kilgarrah stares at Merlin, gaze considering as if he was dissecting Merlin- leaving his soul open and bared to the dragon's knowing golden eyes. Then, something like understanding fills the dragon's eyes and Kilgarrah settles into a comfortable crouch. "No, young warlock, it was you that was right. There is a kindness and purity in you, Merlin. I have said more than once that you are the light to Morgana's darkness, and it's true. You have a pure heart and a kind soul. Without that light not only I would be dead, but many of the knights and citizens of Camelot."

"No, you were right! Arthur is going to order Mordred's execution at the trial tomorrow, and that betrayal will lead Mordred to his fate!" Merlin hangs his head in defeat. "There is nothing I can do to stop it."

A quiet fills the clearing for a moment. "And you will not kill the young druid?" Kilgarrah questions softly, his tone suggesting that he already knows the answer.

"I cannot." Merlin admits. Tears fills his eyes, making them shine bright and manic with despair, "I love him."

Kilgarrah can feel the truth of Merlin's words echoed in his soul, and Kilgarrah grieves for his young dragonlord. The young warlock has fallen head first into it again, giving his heart absolutely and completely to the one person in the world that could shatter it beyond repair. Merlin's faith in humanity and the ease in which he gave his trust and affection was his greatest strength. But, it also was his greatest weakness.

Kilgarrah fears what the future holds for Albion now that all of destiny and fate lies in the hands of the young Pendragon's decision. May the gods have mercy on us all.

Author's Note: I'm hoping because I'm on break from college that I will be able to crank out the last few chapters very soon. With only two or three more chapters to go, I hope everyone who has been following this story and reviewing this whole time will be pleased with end of this story. ~Shirley