I remember what I felt when Peeta was brought back to 13 after the raid on the Tribute Center. I remember wondering what to say. I remember feeling elated and light-headed. I remember wondering if he'd kiss me… hoping he'd kiss me. I remember how it ended - with his hands crushing my neck, trying to choke the life out of me.
"Peeta." I'm cautious in my optimism. I'm on guard. It's not until I lock eyes with him and see they are clear as the gleaming water of the lake.
"Katniss?"
He's so close and yet the distance between us feels like miles. I rush toward him. He looks awful - he's thinned some, and his head is almost entirely wrapped in bandages, but I don't care. I'm crying and he's kissing me everywhere. My hands clasp his face and I bring his mouth to mine. I sob into his mouth, "I thought I lost you."
"Okay kids, let's take it easy." Mom? I look up and see my mother standing at the bottom of the stairs, holding a laundry basket. "Katniss, is your washing machine broken?" my mom asks.
"Mom, what are you doing here?" It's not that I'm not happy she's here, but I'm a little overwhelmed in the moment.
"I'm here to take care of Peeta," she replies.
"I can take care of Peeta." I am unnecessarily defensive. I should just be glad to see my mother, but I'm irrational in the deluge of emotions I'm feeling. Elation over Peeta's return. Guilt that I wasn't here when he got back. Envy that she's finally decided to return to 12, but it's not to take care of me. There is no reason for me to lash out at my mother, but I can feel the indignation steep inside me, growing more potent with each passing moment.
"Katniss, Peeta has been through a lot and he needs professional care. I volunteered to do so - I imagined you'd both prefer a familiar face to having a stranger here," my mother rationalizes.
Of course she's right, but I'm still biting and aggressive in my tone. "I've taken care of him before. In the cave. And in the jungle. I can handle it."
"Katniss," Peeta speaks up. It startles me. I look back at him and my anger slowly dissipates. "Maybe you should listen to your mom."
The house begins to fill with our crew. Delly is the first through the door and is screeching, screeching, in joy. She is leaping up and down and chattering a million words a minute. Johanna kisses Peeta smack on the lips and slaps his cheek.
"Don't scare me like that again," Johanna berates him. Peeta's face is instantly filled with concern. While most of our wounds have healed since Peeta left, Johanna's broken nose is taking the longest to mend. She's much less swollen, and the bruising has yellowed, but it is obvious something terrible happened to her face.
"Johanna…" Peeta's fingers ghost over her bruises, remorse heavy in his voice.
"If you make a big deal out of this, I'll break your nose back and ruin your pretty little face," Johanna threatens him. I'm not sure she is kidding.
"Alright everyone, gather round! Please find a seat!" Effie begins shepherding us together, ever the escort. Haymitch takes the chair and pulls Effie into his lap by her waist. She bats at his hands, but her enormous smile reaches her eyes. Delly sits on the floor in front of Peeta. Gale takes the armrest of the couch, and Johanna noisily drags a chair in from the kitchen. She straddles the back and rests her chin on her hands. "Listen up, children! Mrs. Everdeen quite a lot to say!" Effie harps.
I look at my mom with some worry in my eyes. Peeta squeezes my hand.
"Well," my mother exhales. She's never liked being the center of attention. She clears her throat and begins. "When Peeta arrived in District 4 he was in severe cardiac arrest. The adrenaline triggered by the tracker jacker venom had caused his heart to fail. However, Dr. Aurelius has developed a new antidote and we were able to purge the venom of the sting from Peeta's bloodstream." We all sigh in relief. "Once Peeta was fully stabilized, Dr. Aurelius performed a number of brain scans. Peeta's had numerous scans since his hijacking and Dr. Aurelius has been tracking the impact to different areas in his brain. Most of his observations up until to this point were restricted to what was left of Peeta's original conditioning or an episode triggered by external stimulus. Dr. Aurelius has never been able to scan Peeta's brain so close to an actual injection of venom."
I know she can see the glazed over looks on our faces. All of this is over our heads. She continues anyway. "In the latest set of scans, Dr. Aurelius was able isolate the area of Peeta's amygdala that was in hyperdrive during his episode. Areas of Peeta's dorsal and ventral prefrontal cortex were completely vacant of synapses. These areas guide rational thought and moralistic decision-making."
She can read the room. We are all lost. "Dr. Aurelius was able to identify how the over-stimulus in the amygdala mapped to Peeta's violent and aggressive behavior and was able to dissect that connection surgically."
I look at Peeta's bandaged head. There are no tufts of blonde peeking out from underneath. "You had brain surgery?" I ask.
Trying to ease the panic he can hear in my voice, he says, "Barely. It's just a tiny hole, the size of a pea."
"So what does that mean?" Gale asks. "Is he cured?"
"Unfortunately, no. Continuing his therapy will help, but Peeta will likely always suffer from confused memories, flashbacks, and dissociation with reality."
"Then what exactly did you do?" Delly asks.
It's quiet for a moment.
"They killed the Mutt." I say. My mother smiles.
"Yes. From now on, when Peeta has these episodes, they will continue to be debilitating, but he will not express himself through violent and aggressive behavior. That pathway has been permanently severed."
Everyone is stunned into silence it sinks in. Suddenly, Haymitch leaps up from his chair. "WOO HOO!" he cries out as he spins Effie in the air. The tension breaks, and everyone is laughing and hugging.
Gale claps Peeta on the shoulder and says, "It's good to have you back, man. The women around here are starting to outnumber us."
I sit back for a moment with Peeta and watch the room. This is our family. Effie and Haymitch, dancing in a circle to music only playing in their heads. Delly clapping and jumping up and down, her blonde curls bobbing around her head. Johanna, sticking her tongue in her cheek and saying the surgery has "ruined all the fun" but not meaning a word of it. Gale laughing at Johanna and sneaking a glance my way. My mother, calm and serene, with a half smile creeping across her mouth.
I look at Peeta. The last piece of our family jigsaw puzzle is finally here, and we are complete. "Welcome home," I say. I've never seen a bigger grin.