Part 2: Merch is everywhere but his own series!
(A/N: Merch is here again! This guy is pretty much everywhere, but never has his own series.)
Rick and Morty's world didn't have its space port for warpers, and so they had to go out their way to the Wayne. The Wayne was a spaceport was over the original DC Animated universes owned by a warper Batman. Rick parked and the family got past security before arriving in the main hub.
"Welcome to the Wayne. This, Beth and Summer, is one of the many places where warpers gather to trade, buy, and so forth. Because you two basically look your canon selves, stay close until we get you some new clothes." Rick stated.
Rick was wearing his usual shirt, pants shoes; but had a customized WarpPad that Rick called the Rick-LS clipped to his side. His lab coat was still white, but the Blackthorn kanji on the right shoulder. Morty was still in the gi getup from earlier. Summer and Beth noticed a slave marker where multiple famous women and some younger boys were in harem getup.
"Ugh, there's sex slavery?" Summer said wrinkling her nose.
"Of course. Do you how many people would pay to piss on the face of Wonder Woman? We're warpers. A lot of messed up people with powers to do as we please. It's even legal." Rick stated.
"But it objectifies women." Summer shot back.
"And men…well young boys. A lot of women are as sick as the men." Rick said.
Summer realized Rick had a point especially seeing a woman come out dragging Ben Tennyson, Timmy Turner, and a humanized Twilight Sparkle.
"I've completed my harem of people who were voiced by Tara Strong." The proud owner said with a smirk.
"Someone help us!" Timmy shouted out.
Summer kept walking along, and the group found themselves at a bar. Rick went in to get his flask refilled with Frost Clan ale. The Frost Clan were assholes, but they made the finest ale. Morty took to getting a shot of a Shirley Temple, Beth went for red wine, and Summer got a Long Island Iced Tea. It was then that Merch made his appearance.
"Merch, my glip-glop! How's life?" Rick said glad to see his longtime friend.
"All good, Sanchez. I see you got the whole family except that stain Jerry to warper status. By the way, saw what happened on cable, so no need to explain." Merch said.
Merch was in his black leather jacket, jeans, boots, and having an untucked white buttoned up shirt. Rick made the introductions and the gang all to Merch's ship, the Absoultion.
"I want a ship like this!" Summer said a bit envious.
"But what would you do with it?" Merch asked.
Summer had no answer. Merch first took them to the floor where clothes lay on racks on sale. Rick explained to Beth and Summer that they needed new gear and he'd be buying. As the two bolted to go shopping, Merch turned over to Rick and Morty.
"So, I assume you didn't see the last scene after you left your home with your family. The locations of the Emeralds were revealed somewhat. Four are in the CN Cluster, which is the one hidden in Ryker's Steven Universe home universe, two are most likely in Elvin's possession, and the last one on Ryker. I hate to confirm, but Jōshō does have one. As for the last two, I can't confirm their location other than the fact they are in the Nick Cluster." Merch said to them.
"Well, I assume you have a plan, Rick." Rick said referring to Merch's real name.
"Of course. I already messaged Katsumi Jr. and Kenji. Kenji is clean up this mess." Merch said confidently. "And Katsumi will rid us of a little bug in the windshield if you catch my drift."
"You're leaving that part a surprise." Morty said stating the obvious.
"Of course, leave it to the fans to figure it out." Merch said with a wink to the "audience".
"Merch, you are horribly meta. *urrp*" Rick said with a swig of his flask.
"Speaking of which, Beth and Douchestain are split up now, so Beth's officially single." Merch said looking over to Rick. "You wouldn't mind if I asked her out, right?"
"Depends, any dreams of a harem?" Rick said with one hand on his laster pistol.
Merch wasn't assumed, but dryly said, "No, the worst would be an open marriage if it gets that far."
Rick let go of his pistol, but Morty scowled. He really didn't want Merch to date his mom, but then again wondering if he could get free stuff. Summer come out to join the guys showing them her new outfit.
She now wore a white tank top, a red bandanna, jeans, and cowgirl boots and wears stud earrings.
"You weeb, you raided Bulma's closet." Merch said. "But it does look good on you, I guess."
Personally, Merch thought Beth would look better in it.
"Yeah, I like it, but I don't have the chest for it like mom does." Summer bemoaned.
"You are a reality warper. One of the basic abilites is altering your appearance." Merch said laying a hand on her head.
He transferred the knowledge just to irk Rick and troll Morty. Now with armed with the knowledge, Summer imposed a bit of warping energy to enlarge her chest to about her mother's size.
"Yes, finally! Thank you, Merch!" Summer said before running back to look for more clothes.
"Merch, you perverted bastard." Morty muttered.
"Hypocrite, much? I did give you the same information for you have that enlarged dick of yours." Merch said with a raised eyebrow.
Morty promptly shut up blushing as Rick laughed at him for using warping energy for such a petty thing. Beth came out wearing pink tracksuit identical to Gohan's during Frieza's invasion of Earth, and grey shoes with white soles. She remarked that she wanted something practical.
"You have this in a red wine color?" Beth asked.
Merch got out his BlackTab and with a mere scan, the tracksuit was now wine red. Summer and Beth tried on several clothes. Much to Rick and Morty's horror (with was mostly squick) and Merch's joy, Beth had tried clothes from the Nami, Boa Hancock, and Ino lines. Rick could swear Merch was egging Beth on. Summer took from several martial arts clothes alongside stuff from the Ino, Nami, and Videl lines. In the minds, both girls had bags full of shopping. Merch decided to cover Beth's expenses himself.
"I'm quite happy for you. No longer tied to Jerry. You'll have someone better than him out in the warper world." Merch said with a wink.
"Oh thank you, Merch. It's real kind of you." Beth said with a bit of a blush.
"Please it's Rick, Rick Merkowsi." Merch said kindly.
"Seriously, you eyeballing my daughter." Rick said hand on the laser pistol.
"For shit's sake, she's an adult." Merch said his hand on his own weapon.
"Wait a second, how old are you?" Rick asked.
"36." Merch said. "But I stopped aging at 32."
"Wait, you can stop aging?" Morty asked curiously.
"If you keep absorbing warping energy, your physical body can slow or stop aging. It's how warpers can live long lives with lasting youth. Heck, Akira and Genevieve stopped aging after…" Merch said before going into a thought. "Oh wait, can't say when. Trade secret."
"Well Mr. Merkowsi, if you're interested, I'd be happy with a date or two." Beth remarked.
"Well you can use this." Merch said handing a smartphone. "It's a prototype, I'm working on. A bit of a take on the Galaxy 6s. I call it the Galaxy Spark. Only 5 exists and while it's not up to snuff like the BlackTab, it's quite a marvel."
Beth eyed the expensive and priceless gift, but Rick looked annoyed.
"So is that the assurance, you'll get my daughter's pants?" Rick said with his arms crossed.
"Slow down, Rick. That comes when it does, and besides I'll rather your family test it out." Merch said in all seriousness. "Now any of you in the mood for weapons and other gadgets?"
In the end, the Smith-Sanchez was on it's way home. Beth, Summer, and Morty got their own ships to pilot. Rick was drinking harder than usual. Merch had the hots for his daughter.
"Damn it, Merch!" Rick said before letting out a belch. "Now I got to deal with this."
(A/N: And there's the ending of the two-shot, I hope you enjoyed it. Because I did. Now we have Merch/Beth!)