"Huck is missing."
Her voice sounds hollow. Olivia is sitting on the edge of her desk, her cell phone to her ear, and a full glass of scotch beside her. This disaster calls for something stronger than wine. Scotch is always what she drinks at her lowest point. It reminds her of Fitz. She doesn't miss him anymore, but she misses the way she felt about him. And she misses how he always had the answer. That's what she needs right now: an answer.
"Liv, are you okay?" Mellie asks from the other end of the phone. Olivia realizes she's been silent for a while now.
"I don't know what to do," she says, and for once, this is true. The gladiators are hard at work in the next room over, looking for something – anything – to lead them to Huck, dead or alive. Liv helped for a while, but she felt like she was just taking up space. And every time she looked at Abby, guilty and defenceless, sitting in the corner of the room, Liv felt a hot rage rip through her.
Now, in the quiet of her office, something had drawn her to her phone, to dial Mellie's all too familiar number. She just needed to hear her voice.
"I'm sorry," Mellie says quietly. Her voice makes Olivia feel steady again. "You'll find him. You are Olivia Pope."
Olivia smiles sadly through the phone. She doesn't feel much like Olivia Pope right now.
"Do you want me to come to OPA?" Mellie asks, with a softness in her voice. She speaks so tenderly to Olivia these days, ever since the two started sleeping together. No one in the office knows, or they're at least quiet about it. Liv likes having a harmless little secret. She hardly ever has the luxury.
"No, it's okay." Mostly, Liv doesn't want Mellie to see her like this. Quinn and Abby and all the rest of them have seen her at her lowest points, but Liv has made sure that Mellie only knows Strong Olivia. White Hat Olivia. Gladiator Olivia. Mellie is the one bright spot in her life right now, and Liv doesn't need to tie her up in all of this mess.
"Okay. Call me if you need me. You'll find him, Liv. I know it, and Huck knows it."
"Thank you," she says, her voice catching in her throat. She hangs up, but almost immediately, Liv thinks about calling her back. "I do need you," she would say, "I always need you." But that would be too much for either of them to handle. The two are content to leave some things unspoken.
So Olivia takes a deep breath and rejoins her gladiators. Mellie may not have had the answers, but what she has given her is far better.