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Chapter Three: BONDO
"Garrus!" Shepard grinned as soon as she walked into med bay. "Good to see up and around buddy." She moved on lighter feet than she had in a long time.
Garrus held his hands up as if to say: 'Here I am.' he was even wearing BDUs which meant he was being discharged. Shepard's eyes were drawn to the right side of his face and the flesh colored cybernetic jaw replacement and new eye. The prosthetic did more than replace a portion of the man's cheek, and jaw it also replaced an ear. The whole right side of his face was rough and raw.
"Yeah." He looked to the woman who was very nearly his sister and found the tensions leak out of him. He was going stir-crazy and she was just the person he needed at the moment. "No one will give me a mirror how bad is it?"
"Damn Garrus you were always ugly. Just slap some face paint on there and no one will know the difference." Sam said glibly.
The turian cracked up laughing then groaned. "Oohh don't make me laugh." his mandibles twitched in an avianesque grin. "You know some women like scars, granted most of those women are krogan." His comment got Shepard to snicker. "What do you think? Tali the type?"
"I think she's the Garrus type."
"You think so?"
"Absolutely. She loves you."
"I might have screwed that up." Garrus sighed then leaned his hips heavily against the footboard of the bed he had formally occupied.
"You too huh?" The spectre mirrored his stance with the next-door bed.
Garrus nodded. He looked up and saw the weary lines in Shepard's face, the dark circles under her eyes. "So what did you do?"
"Something stupid but…"
"Necessary."
"Yeah. A bit like you when you drew the fire of that god-damn gunship." Shepard's hand ran through her short black hair. A sad smile slipped past her face as the action brought with it the playful memory of Liara pleading to be allowed to cut Sam's hair. Of course the dark locks were a bit uneven and the style made her look like a thistle but Shepard actually liked the more unruly look and bits of her forelock hung across the bridge of her nose. It made her look more like a Spectre or so she told herself. "I really fucked up with Liara."
Garrus shrugged and put a hand on young woman's shoulder. "So go make it better."
"I don't think words will fix this one, Buddy." Shepard muttered shoving her idle hands into the front pockets of her BDUs trousers.
"Then just sit and let her yell at you." the hand came away and gripped the footboard behind him, taking some of the weight off his legs.
The Spectre nodded. "Sooo…you and Tali? What's up with that?" She diverted her troubles by tackling another's. It was a cheap trick but Garrus understood the need to change objectives.
"Said something very stupid. She took it badly." Garrus grunted.
"What did you say?" the dark haired woman cocked her head. She saw the weariness in the turian's face, not just the tiredness that comes from a stay in sickbay but the whole draining feeling that was birthed from bickering with the one you love.
This time his mandibles twitched in agitation. He mumbled something causing Shepard to lean in. "Say again, I didn't copy."
"I said she deserved better than a tired washed out C-Sec officer."
"Oh you didn't." Shepard rolled her cerulean eyes. "That was such a dumb-ass thing to say. Why in the hell did you say something like for?"
Garrus shrugged child-like. "I don't know. As I said I was stupid."
"Very." Shepard's eyes were drawn to his scarred right side. "So make it better." she tossed Garrus own words back at him.
"I tried. I did! But she said she didn't want to hear anything from an idiot and I was to get stuffed. I'm down to ideas of trying to bribe her with gifts but I don't know what to give her. I suppose some new tools, but that doesn't seem romantic enough. Maybe one of those hamsters but I don't know how she'll eat it…"
Shepard made a face but didn't press the issue. She didn't really want to know why giving a cute little space hamster in lieu of chocolates was a good idea. Maybe it was a turian thing. The Spectre highly doubted such an idea was a quarian thing sometimes…gift-giving doesn't translate. Whatever the case, Sam decided if he was to go that route to steer him away from the whole eat-a-space-hamster thing.
"I'm out of my depth here. Tali doesn't strike me as a flowers type of woman."
Shepard raised an eyebrow and smirked. "I actually have an idea about that. In the mean time you're going to have to make it up to her. You know the whole time you were out she stayed here." She slid her hand out of her pocket and pointed with her thumb over her shoulder to the bed behind her. "Saying she deserves better is exactly the same as saying you don't trust her judgment."
"That's ridiculous! In no way did I even hint at that." Garrus protested "Why would she think that?"
Shepard moaned in exasperation, "You kinda did give her that idea. You also hinted that she's the shallow type that won't accept a man who isn't Mr. Model-of-the-Year. She's the Garrus type, Buddy. Scars and all."
"Ah crap." He sighed. "I didn't think I said all that. She read all of that in my words?"
"Of course she did Garrus. She's a woman. And a young woman at that, so she's going to take things very sensitively and very seriously. You are her first love…well outside drive-cores."
He chuckled dryly at that last part. . "So now what?"
"Like you said you let her yell at you, you apologize and you make it better. Prove to her you're no idiot. Tell her you fell in to a stupid pocket and it took a cute quarian to pull you out of it. She'll laugh and you'll be out of trouble."
Garrus nodded. "Yeah. Easy right?" the sarcasm came thick. "So what did you do?"
Sam looked down at her boots then looked up through the fringe of her hair and told him what she did had done.
It took several moments before Garrus found his voice. "Ah crap. Shepard…that was one hell of a risk you took. And you said I did a dumb-ass thing." He sighed. "After everything you two have been through you tempted fate again? Please tell me you shielded." When the human didn't answer right away Garrus was now the one to respond incredulously. "Shepard! You shielded right?"
"I did. But it still touched Liara. Something will always slip through. Always touch. And…and I know she's worried, and angry, and pissed, and afraid. Making it right…is going to take more than getting a well-deserved chewing out."
"But you'd do it again." Garrus said. "Just for the off chance that T'Loak will do what you need her to do."
"Yes."
"That's…."
"Garrus, we will lose this war if we don't pull everyone together." Shepard interrupted him. She sounded tired and desperate. Without her mental knowledge her body began pacing. "I told Liara once I didn't know what I was doing trying to create a galactic wide alliance. I'm no diplomat. I'm far too blunt and I don't know how to play political games. You know what she told me?
"She told me that you threaten, you cajole, you bribe, you make concessions and you make some really hard decisions." Shepard looked down whispering. "And that is exactly what I've been doing." she bit her lower lip and puffed out a hard breath of air. "And sometimes you have to dance with the devil."
"And we have two devils from which to choose." Garrus said understanding full well where the Spectre was going. He rubbed the back of his neck as he spoke. "Hell of a choice between the Pirate Queen or and Cerberus. And you can't trust either one of them. Both will turn on you in a heartbeat if the opportunity is there."
"T'Loak's a pirate. I trust her to be dishonest, to use every occasion to maintain power over her dominion and to take advantage of all opportunities she sees. One of them is it to see that the galaxy remain status quo. Cerberus isn't ever going to be an option." Shepard rubbed her forehead.
"Come on, Shepard." Garrus suddenly grabbed the human's arm and began steering her towards the door of the med-bay. "Time to go make it up to our ladies."
"You do know mine can slam me into a wall with a flick of her wrist." the Spectre said.
"And mine carries a shotgun."
There was no mirth in Shepard's answering chuckle.
"Come to think of it, I think I'd rather face down another rocket." Garrus muttered darkly. "Or take on another squadron of hired goons."
"That sounds infinitely more survivable." Shepard tossed back. She rubbed the space between her eyes as if to alleviate the spell of dizziness that started to take residence behind them. She had set it aside as an after effect of Aria's meld but the vertigo was settling in for the long haul. If it didn't abate soon she'd be forced to take something for it.
MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME ME
Shepard leaned her forehead against the doors of the Loft. The coolness of the surface pressing into her flesh felt good against the headache lingering behind her eyes. Her head was swimming as if she had been doing shots of tequila. Once more she concluded it was because of what Aria had done to her during the mental assault. She tried to block it off from touching Liara. Her head snapped back as if hit with an upper cut and swam with pain of a biotic backlash. Gritting her teeth she rode the pain until it subsided with the dull nagging throbbing of a toothache.
"Infinitely more survivable." the dark-haired Spectre muttered to the door as the pain continued to linger. The languishing intoxicated buzzing state was far more preferable. But this was a hangover without the benefit of being drunk.
Sam didn't want to do this, didn't want to face her bondmate, her Liara - her Angel Eyes. The anger, oh the anger Sam could take, she deserved it. It was the disappointment; the pain she had placed within her Li was the unbearable part. There was only one time Sam felt this low, this miserable, was back when she was thirteen. The biotic flare-up and the migraine that followed had been so bad she nearly destroyed all the furnishings within the common room of her family quarters. Mamma had to sedate her. Young Samantha heard her father call her a freak, an accident of creation and he wanted to get rid of her by sending her to some secret training facility and pretend she wasn't his daughter or that he even had one.
'Nothing ever got done by avoiding it.' Sam chided herself.
The Spectre opened the doors half-expecting to be pointedly ignored or told to get out. She was prepared for a barrage of anger and tears, and accusations. What she didn't expect was a very drunk bondmate sitting on the floor. Liara was watching the hypnotic mindless swimming of the fish in the tank directly across from her. By the prothean expert's hip were two empty bottles of elasa, known as 'Sorrow's Companion' in the basic human tongue. There was a third in her limp azure hand. How her bondmate was still upright…well…mostly upright Sam didn't know.
"You're drunk." the Spectre said.
Well that explained everything, why there was a backlash when she tried to shield Liara from the unsettling sensations. It was impossible to shield another from themselves.
Liara took a sip from the bottle. "Pretty much, yes. You going to make something out of it?"
Sam shook her head. She really didn't have the right to say anything, hell she wanted to get drunk if she wasn't already vicariously feeling so. Liara wasn't the only one who became drunk due to a lover's actions.
Lying on the sofa was none other but Tali, passed out by the looks of it. And well she should be for she seemed to have attempted to match drink for drink with Liara. Two wasted bottles of tripled filtered turian brandy were near the foot of the couch.
"Oh my." the words slipped past her lips as she tipped-toed to the sofa bent down and picked up one of the empty bottles. "How did she become so drunk?" Her eyebrows formed a V as she narrowed her eyes and plucked from the quarian's limp hand a straw. "What on earth… is that a straw?"
"Emergency induction port." Liara corrected flippantly.
"It's a straw."
"Does it matter what it's called? It has served its purpose." Liara challenged.
"Guess you're right." Shepard relented and dropped the straw on to the floor were it bounced end-on-end before it rolled under the sofa.
"I'm right about a lot of things. I'm right about that…that woman…that…bitch-whore whose…whose…corrupting you. She is bad influence on you, Samantha. I do not like her." Liara growled.
A thin black eyebrow rose to the level of Sam's forelock. It was so rare that Liara engaged in profanity that it was a shock to hear it even still. "Bitch-whore? You mean Aleena?"
"Who other?" the words were darkly spoken. Sam watched as her bondmate took the bottle in hand and drank deeply from its mouth. "It's bad enough she is going to be Shiala's bondmate but…now that you have been adopting her as…as….as….some sort of mentor is intolerable!"
Shepard looked away for a moment wincing at the unnatural character of her wife. She slid to the floor next to the very drunk asari and kept schooled the expression of indignity of on Liara's countenance.
"It wasn't Aleena who…"
"You are going to defend her? To me? Now?" Liara pinned Samantha with a baleful glare.
Shepard opened her mouth then snapped it closed it with the click of her teeth. "No."
Liara took another drink.
There was a long deep breath of silence before it was shattered by slurred questions. "What does she bring to the table, but to train you to be false to yourself? She's turning you into something you're not!"
Sam let out a growled breath of heated air. "'You cajole, you bribe, you make concessions and you make some really hard decisions.' That's what you told me I should do. And I am, Liara. Some of those decisions work in the battlefield, but they don't work in a marriage. I'm sorry." Sam said softly. "I can't keep the battlefield from touching you Liara or our marriage. What's coming on the horizon with the Reapers..." the Spectre sighed heavily. "I'm worried, Angel Eyes. Sometimes I feel as if there are no battlements to secure, no to lines to hold, no ground to take back or foothold to seize and I am adrift in space. That isn't a good place for a commander…" then more darkly, more guiltily Samantha added: "or a bondmate."
Liara was silent.
Sam reached out her hand – a fraction of a second later the cool kiss of glass was slapped into her palm. The dark haired human began to lift the bottle to her lips but stopped and settled it instead in her lap. Blue eyes looked to the label: Elasa.
"Sorrow's Companion. Kind of appropriate isn't it?" Misery echoed in Samantha's voice. "Liara, I am so…so…sorry." she started to peel the label from the bottle her eyes unfocusingly gaze on the eloquent calligraphy of Asarian script. "If I could keep you from pain I would, I'd keep misery and sorrow from ever touching you, Li. But I don't have that power. I will never have that power." she sighed. "I know you don't like Aleena."
Liara rolled her eyes and scoffed.
"Sometimes you have to step into the shadows and do a little evil to do a greater good. It's like back on that asteroid with Terra Nova. I killed Cham because he was a fucking slaver. He wanted another Mindoir, another Elysium. I wasn't about to let that go. I saw it; he was willing to negotiate, willing to walk away. I knew I could make him leave with just words. I wouldn't do it. I couldn't let him go. Not for the crimes he was committing.
"Slavery is abomination. So I killed him. And his men. You were there. And then Balak…" the bottle in Sam's hands was nearly stripped of its label. Parts of it lay on the human's lap in shreds of damp coiled pulp. "Mother-fracking bastard!" Tears started to stream down Sam's face. "I let him go because he had hostages. I wanted to kill him; I wanted to see his fracking head explode into a pulpy mass.
"I had those lives in my hands. And he knew how to play me. I let him go. And he's going to return and he's going to try to do the same thing again to some other human colony…"
A blue hand reached out and stopped the fidgeting caramel ones. Sam didn't raise her head, her eyes focusing now in the blue fingers covering the back of her hand. "I know I've been treading in the lines of shadows lately. This thing with Lawson—using Oriana as I've been doing." the commander took in a great breath of air and slowly expelled it. "And Aria…and Aleena…and…." She stopped talking suddenly. It was as if her mind could not construct the words for her mouth to form, until: "The things I made Aria do. Let her do. And I didn't tell you. And I used you too. I—I used your gut reaction to what was going to happen."
"Is this when you tell me it was necessary?" Liara hissed snatching her hand back. The anger and frustration more than evident on her young sapphire freckled face. The bond screamed with it.
Sam shook her head. Fingers once more continued their robotic assault on the bottle's label.
"I understand why Commander Shepard didn't say anything. But why didn't my Samantha?"
Shepard looked up, staring now at the fish within the tank anywhere but her wife's eyes. "There are times, I can't be both." she looked back to the bottle now completely stripped of the label that lay in tatters on her lap and floor. She snorted realizing the unintended physical metaphor before her.
"You married a military woman, Liara. Sometimes I can't be both."
"It's a trivial risk isn't it?" Liara muttered. "When it all comes down to it."
Shepard dared to look over her shoulder to the woman she held most dear in her heart, in her soul. Liara was her soul's ease, the quiet in the storm. Liara was everything. And there was one thing Shepard didn't know how to do and that was how not to protect her. Now that instinct, that need had wounded their marriage.
"Like stealing the Normandy." Liara continued. "Had we been caught you and the rest of the Alliance military personnel would have been court martialed. The rest of us imprisoned. And Anderson executed for the capital offense. All of us might have faced the firing squad. But to stop Saren we did it. And we did a lot of things that stepped over a few lines. 'A little evil to do a greater good.'
"I supposed that's what it means to be a Spectre. No one really thinks about it. The rest of us only think you are not bound to the restrictions to follow the laws or regulations but you do have a code of sorts, almost like a Justicar. You will do what it takes to complete your mission." Liara sighed. "I get why you have to do these things, Samantha. I truly do. I understand this."
Liara shifted so now she was kneeling before her bondmate, her eyes staring deeply into the other set of blue, her hands on either side of the human's cheeks. "And I told you once before I don't need a protector and I don't want one! I want YOU Samantha." She rested her forehead against the younger woman's "Whether you're a pure paragon of virtue or you tread in shadows or if you slip entirely into the dark. I want you. But I want to be a part of you!"
The archaeologist pulled up and away. She might have gone to her feet if Liara didn't know that in her drunken state her feet would betray her and send her tumbling back to the floor. "I want to be a part of the decisions you make. And you can't do what you did with Aria and exclude me. Commander or bondmate: you don't get to choose. I accepted you one-in-and-the-same. And you have to accept me as one-in-and-the-same: bondmate and crewmate." this time she did rise. Her back turned to Samantha. "You can't exclude me. Not when…not when it touches us both. You can't do that. Not any more."
Sam just nodded.
"And here's another thing."
"Yeah." the human's face was dejected and chagrined. The sound was only a whisper.
"You said you wanted marriage, old age and a lot of little blue children."
Again a nod from the dark haired woman, there was fear now growing as a weed within her mind; in her soul that Liara would suddenly decide little blue children were out of the question or worse. ...their marriage was…over.
"Well what if I want pink ones?"
That snapped the Spectre's head up. The question utterly flummoxed her. It was something she absolutely did not expect. It hit her like a 45 mm. shot between the eyes. Pink? "Huh?" was as loquaciously eloquent as Sam could muster.
"Pink ones…or…or…lightly tanned ones. Whatever. You ones. Human ones!" Liara was eminently determined. She folded her arms under her chest unintentionally or at the very least unknowingly mimicking 'the commander's pose.' "When the time comes, I want human babies. Your babies. We are going to have human babies." The tone in her voice said there was absolutely no room for negotiation, she had made the decision and that was that.
Samantha opened and closed her mouth.
"That is the decision. That is what we are doing. The bloodline of Shepard should not die out."
"I…ah…um….oh…oh…okay…" Shepard frowned suddenly as a thought etched its way from her hindbrain to the forefront. "Li, what if I can't carry them? There has been a lot of damage to me. I'm partly cybernetic now."
"Are you unwilling to try?" a glare.
"No." Sam locked her legs around the bottle in her lap and held her hands up in surrender. "No. I didn't say that. I just…I didn't think…I am…shutting up now. I am really shutting up. Yep this is me shutting up."
Liara smirked triumphantly. "Your mind my love is running a million klicks an hour you are not shutting up."
"I'm….I'm…I'm still processing. Um okay pink babies. Pink babies are good. One or two-sure."
"You want lot of blue babies and I get one or two pink?"
"Liara…" Sam set the bottle of wine aside and stood up to meet her bondmate's gaze. "Let's just find out if I can still have them. But yeah….Goddess yeah! Okay. But you know it doesn't work the same with humans."
Liara cocked a half indulgent smile. "You do not think I know how duel-sexed species mate? Even with artificial insemination? Or that we can end up with a son rather than a daughter? I am not a dull stone, Samantha."
"Never said you were. Thought never crossed my mind. But as for the possibility of having a boy, are you sure you're okay with that?"
"Of course I am. What kind of question is that? You actually think that because I am monogendered I am a sexist? Honestly Samantha, I'm a little disappointed if you thought that. That word has no meaning to asari."
"I know and of course I didn't think that, Li. It's just…"
Liara waved the potential argument off. "Doesn't matter. What does is if we have a son, then we have a son. I'm fully prepared for that. I will love him for he is our child. And I've been thinking we should look for potential sperm donors on the Salish side of your ancestry."
"Um…okay. Why?"
Liara slinked forward touching Samantha's dark locks with a delicate touch before running her cerulean fingers along her high cheek bones and touching the splash of freckles that ran along under her eyes and bridge of her nose. "Because you have very lovely features, striking in fact. And that blood should not die out; that culture should not die out because of the amalgamation of your world's dominant races. Our children be they pink or blue will know it."
Shepard nodded. "No wonder my mother adores you. You know there are times when you're the 'favourite daughter'?"
Liara laughed. Then more seriously she took hold of her bondmate's face and kissed the soft ruby lips. "I know my pink babies will have to wait until the war is over. I'm okay with that too." She smiled softly.
"I love you, Liara." Samantha said with all the passion, and adoration she held for this wonderful woman before her. The bond exploded with it.
Purple lips took red. "Show me." Liara began pushing Sam towards their bed but met with some resistance. There was a slight hurt expression on the young maiden's face until she followed her bondmate's line of sight. Sam's furtive glance to the passed out quarian on the sofa explained all.
"Don't worry she'll be out for hours. Tali is what you humans call a 'light weight.' She downed a bottle and a half of turian brandy; she won't be getting up anytime soon. I'm surprised she didn't get sick. She'll have one hell of a hangover come the morning." She kissed Samantha once more, biting the lower ruby lip causing the human to moan just as she wanted. "Besides all that time on ground side camps we've learned how to be quiet." Liara purred, her left hand cupping the underside of Samantha's breast as her right continued to stroke a light caramel cheek with the pad of her thumb. She trailed the digit across Sam's lips which opened ever so slightly, softly kissing it.
The Spectre slid forward, her lips close to the delicate inner folds along the asari's neck. "Such an exquisite neck." she trailed kisses upwards along Liara's jaw. "So beautiful… sculpted perfection."
The prothean expert sucked-in a sharp breath—expelled in wanting moan. She felt a smile on her flesh as Sam's hands slipped to hips to rest along the thighs. She shifted to other side of Liara's neck her tongue flicking out tasting the innermost folds.
Her hand flared with a small glow of biotic power, she whispers softly in the asari's ear "Let me show you my love." Her hand trailed down the spine to the lower reaches near the bottom and sent the soft pulse of energy directly on top of azure. Currents of biotic energy hit every nerve ending along the spine causing Liara to gasp suddenly.
Without seeing, fingers deftly made quick work to shed interfering clothing which became scattered and carelessly strewn across the floor of the quarters. Soft moans escape as the lips continue on their journey, and hands shimmering with biotic energy gently caress the now exposed skin. Starting at the small of Sam's back causing a slight moan of pleasure escape before slowly working their way upwards tracing every muscle fiber stimulating every nerve.
Two bodies simmered in the glowing light of biotics. Liara returned kiss for kiss, touch for touch. Her own lips lower to the now exposed neckline of her beloved, lips softly brushing the skin where neck meets shoulder. Cerulean eyes became obsidian, unquenchable liquid fire turned wanton blood into molten need.
Azure fingers slowly trailed along tanned thighs in tiny sensual circles. Possessive fingers slid up from hip around to the back to shoulder blade, gently caressing the outline of the human's shapely body. Teeth set together as a hiss of pure pleasure left the lungs.
Human and asari minds touched, meeting in the middle, reflecting the blissful sensations back gasps escape slightly parted lips as the reflection bathes them in sensations reach new heights once joined, feeling every place where the bodies touch. The bond ignited deeper more passionate kisses along the slender neck, feeling the pulse racing beneath hungry lips.
'Goddess.' is thought but not said it is sent, pleasure ripples directly to the core of the soul, consuming guiding yielding and demanding. Wanting to give, wanting to receive, mind fully open, tendrils of energy follow tanned fingertips of one hand brushing along her inner thighs, the other hand under the crest. Ruby lips taking sweet offerings of her mouth, tongue seeking entrance, one leg shifts between the thighs where fingers once danced, allowing the freed hand to cup the underside of sapphire buttocks.
Sam took the cue, the hand once holding the perfect backside now slithers along the toned muscles seeking the heated entrance. Fingertips tease the lower lips with tiny biotic pulses, they flicker upon the ghostly touch of butterfly wings until one then two fingers enter the slick wetness. The Spectre's thumb brushed against the hardened nub, her desire flares within the link sending it directly into Liara's divine blue rose. The fingers slide in dancing but it is the link, the velvet touch of minds which become ablaze with want that generates the white lighting within.
MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME
Tali felt her head explode.
Her ears thundered with each heartbeat. And her stomach last time she saw it was a mass relay ago and it was trying to come back in full-force. Left arm pinned under her body was numb and lost all feeling. Her right arm wasn't too happy with her either having hung off the sofa for several hours without moving.
For a moment she panicked as she did not recognize the floor she was currently staring at. Spotting two bottles of turian brandy it all came flooding back making her headache all that more malevolently spiteful. So this was a hangover.
'Keelah," she grumbled trying to get to her feet but all she managed to do was roll over on her arse landing unceremoniously on the bottles which scattered across the floor in a tonal menagerie of clinking and clanging.
"Ehe?" a muffled sound came from the bed. "Tali that you?" It was Shepard.
Apparently the commander had made up with Liara. By the look of the uniforms haphazardly scattered in little pools of cloth the make-up was enthusiastically embraced. Well wasn't that just perfect. They had sex while she was passed out on the sofa. Liara gets her girl but Tali was without her bosh'tet of a guy. That's just bloody fracking perfect.
"How are you feeling?" the words were sleepily said not from the Spectre but from Liara.
"Fine." the girl lied trying to find where she had misplaced her sense of balance. By her second attempt the quarian made it to her unsteady feet, which caused a brand new wave of nausea to pugilisticly bully itself from her head to the pit of her stomach.
If she was going to crash again the young engineer wanted it to be in her own rack. The way she was feeling Tali was having strong considerations about heading off to sickbay despite what Chakwas might have to say about her midnight bender. Where she didn't want to be was in the same quarters with the snuggled up couple on the bed who had apparently fallen back asleep. So much for their deep concerns over her welfare.
Half-hooded eyes cast a near jealous glance towards the bed. The quarian saw Liara's head resting comfortably on Sam's left shoulder with her blue cheek pillowed on the human's breast whose arms encircled her bondmate.
"Must be nice." Came a mumbled response before the engineer's ambled on a wobbling crooked path to the doors of the Loft and finally to the lift.
She didn't actually recall hitting the buttons to command the elevator to go down several decks; she only remembered getting into the car. Her head was pounding with each breath she took and each breath brought on unwelcome vertigo and the reflexive desire to vomit. It came as quite a shock when the doors opened to reveal Garrus standing there.
Whatever deck he intended to get to quickly vacated his itinerary once Tali nearly toppled into his arms.
"I'm going to be sick." She mumbled.
"Tali, by the Spirits…what wrong?"
"Sick." she slurred.
"I'll get you to Chakwas! Is it a suit rupture?" he started frantically to frisk her looking for any tear but thus far he found nothing, which made him all the more panicked. "What happened? Where were you? Why didn't anyone help you?"
"Too loud." she protested and put a hand up to his mouth. "Shuussh."
"Tali what happened?!" he would not be silenced.
"You sound like a vorcha." she cursed. "Too many questions…Keelah" she held her stomach. "Ooh, I'm going to be sick."
"Damn slow thing! Come on. Come on!" Garrus stabbed his finger repeatedly into the button for the crew deck. "Hang on Tali. Okay, I'm getting you to Dr. Chakwas."
"Not that kind'a'ick," she moaned trying to push away at his pawing. "Other sick."
"Other sick?" Garrus was all but carrying her now.
"I said shhhh." the quarian whimpered.
Then it stuck the turian. Tali wasn't suffering from a suit rupture, it was a hangover. And if she was going to be sick-that could be very messy inside her helmet. "I'll…er…get you to a clean room. Just hang on a bit more."
The lift doors opened one deck below the crew deck where all the R&D labs were located. Of the three clean rooms, the smallest was generally held in reserve for Tali by the order of the Spectre, for her use be it emergency or general hygiene maintenance. Of course being such Garrus had to support Tali was they waited for the decontamination cycle to finish in the airlock between the labs before the doors unsealed.
"Oh Keelah…" Tali groaned making a hard swallowing sound behind her mask "I don't think I can hold it down." she lurched trying to get her hood.
"Oh for the love of Spirits hurry up!" Garrus bitched to the computer telling them to "Please stand by. You are about to enter a clean room, please ensure you have observed all safety precautions before entering. Be advised this is a hazmat zone"
"I know that already." Garrus snarled at the Normandy's VI. In his worry he had nearly forgotten to jump into one of the enviro-suits, no need to tell the damn computer that though. Grudgingly he hit the command panel that opened a recessed compartment containing white and blue hazmat suits that could be worn over standard issued hardsuits and BDUs. He propped Tali against the far wall as he shrugged the damn thing on and placed a respirator over his mouth.
"Cycle complete Thank you for your cooperation" The pneumatic doors finally slid open with an air-compressed hiss.
"You really need to overhaul that thing one day, Tali. I swear it's becoming more annoying by the …" the turian faulted mid-sentence as he witnessed Tali rush past him, tear at the seals behind her hooded helmet, drop her faceplate which clattered on the metallic floor and promptly vomit. "…day." he finished lamely.
He heard soft weeping as he stepped closer to the woman he loved.
"I'm…I'm…so sorry." Tali hiccupped wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.
Garrus still had not seen her face as he was coming up behind her. "You have nothing to be sorry about. It happens." the timbre in his voice purred soothingly.
"But…But this isn't how I wanted you to see me for the first time." Tali moaned still trying to hide under her hood.
When she vomited again he was there to hold her head. He leaned the back of her small frame against his sturdier one, his free arm snaking around her middle to further give her support.
"I made a mess." she muttered.
"Don't worry about it, I'll get it. Come on Love let's get you cleaned up."
"Love?" Tali looked up causing Garrus to gasp.
He never imagined her more beautiful. What was most striking were her large almond shaped silver eyes. They had an almost iridescent glow to them. Her face…was asarinoid or humanoid depending on who you asked. Her nose was slightly longer and narrower than either of the other two species. But her features were very similar to both. She even had eyebrows like a human though they were thinner and had an upwards slant to them. Her light lilac skin was marked in thin black strips almost like an Earth tiger. Peeking from under the helmet he saw traces of black fur…no not fur it was hair like a humans.
"You're…beautiful…" his mouth stumbled awkwardly around the syllables. He felt his breath stop in his lungs and his heart stop beating. He stood and stared, he couldn't even move it was as if he had become encased in carbonate such was the power of her beauty.
Tali found her lips smiling despite her stomach, and headache. She felt very far away from being beautiful,
"Yes." Garrus found his voice once more. "You are my love. Aren't you?"
She meekly nodded. Then began to weep all over again. Garrus easily shifted their position away from the mucky puddle on the floor and cradled the shuddering quarian in his arms
"I am sooo sorry." she continued to repeat the apology over and over.
"I told you have nothing to be apologetic for, I made you mad remember? I'm the one supposed to be saying I'm sorry here, not you." the turian tried to break past her guilt.
"But I ruined everything." there was no consoling her.
"Well I'll admit I did envision something very different for seeing you, touching you for our first time. But right now, I don't care." With the pad of his gloved thumb he wiped away the tears trailing down pale lavender cheeks. "Can you stand now?"
When the young engineer nodded her head, Garrus gingerly raised them both to their feet. "Go take a shower; get cleaned so you feel a hundred percent quarian again, and I'll take care of that." he tilted his head to indicate the pool of vomit on the floor.
Her face flushed a deep purple at the thought of him cleaning up after her mess. Seeing the protest on her red lips he again shook his head. "Don't worry about it, Honey. I got it." he repeated.
"Garrus…" sliver eyes leaked more tears. But there was a smile on her lips now that wasn't there before. "I love you."
The former C-Sec officer's mandibles twitched in a version of the ear to ear grin. Hell he'd clean up a hundred pools of vomit if only to hear Tali say those words again. Besides that he reasoned it was his penance for upsetting her so much that she sought solace in a brandy bottle in the first place. He had heard that she had disappeared into the Loft with Liara last night. He couldn't explain why he was both unconcerned and worried at the same time. It didn't make any sense to him then and it didn't make any more sense to him now. He was glad she had not drunk alone and that Liara was there for her. No doubt Shepard felt the same about her own lifemate.
Lifemate?
Is that what Tali was now? Not officially of course but his brain didn't exactly rebel against the idea. In fact the very thought of the word made him giddy. Giddy? Since when did a turian warrior become giddy. He smiled once more and set about to clean cleaning up the biological spill. Since he fell in love that's when. He used to ridicule his brother turians when they were what Vakarian termed 'gone all squishy' when they spoke to their lovers. He recalled one such couple shopping at one of the souvenir shops at the Citadel back in his C-Sec days.
'Why would I want a model ship? I'm an engineer, Honey I work on them all day. How is a model supposed to remind me of the citadel?'
"Honey? Phft what kind of turian calls his mate Honey" Garrus scoffed privately as he continued to listen to the couple argue in the souvenir shop.
'It's festive. Okay then if not a model how about a fish?' the asari asked hanging on to his arm.
"A fish? Really? They die."
"Then it's important to treasure the time you have with it." the bondmate said.
'Is this the lifespan talk again? We're not going into the lifespan talk. Honey, look I just want to spend my time here with you, okay? I don't want a model ship, and I don't want a fish."
"But that little ship is so cute."
"Ships aren't cute, they are…' a sigh 'Okay Honey, I'll get a ship.'
Weak. Garrus thought to himself. Imagine buckling like that just because some woman smiles at you. Grow a pair buddy.
He saw the asari matron bounce on the balls of her feet as she reached up and kissed her bondmate on his cheek which he indulgently returned by nuzzling the top of her crest. The young man shook his head which caught the other turian's eyes.
'Wait until you find yours, boy. When you do, you won't' mind it at all. You'll do a lot of things you didn't think you would just to see that gorgeous smile.' he kissed his lover on her crest again and walked out of the shop with her with as much pride as a frontline general.
"Oh leave him alone my husband; it's evidently clear he's still in his maiden stage. He's into dalliances not permanent bond material."
"Turians don't have maiden stages, Honey." The male said as they continued to walk along the streets of the Presidium.
"Sure you do. You simply refer to it as adolescence. Same thing." A blue hand waved in the air dismissing the difference of semantics.
At the time when he had overheard the two talking Garrus had thought the turian male had gone all soft and squishy, reduced to a puddle because a woman smiled at him. But now…now he understood, just like the older male said he would. Here he was on his knees cleaning up vomit and not being disgusted by it, only greatly concerned over Tali's welfare. The former C-Sec officer's greatest desire was to ensure Tali was alright, that she find no cause to shed more tears in sorrow. He wanted her happy and safe. If she wanted to present him with silly gifts because they were cute he'd accept especially in return he caught a glimpse of that smile, that wonderful, glorious smile he had been blessed to see.
That wasn't being squishy or weak; it was being a loving devoted partner. That was hardcore, nothing soft about it. Look at Shepard. She was as hardcore as they come but one look, one touch from Liara and the Specter was all goo. You have to be very strong and self-assured to allow another to kindle that sort reaction willingly. Now he finally and truly understood how and why the fires burned brightly between Shepard and Liara. Now he was fortunate to not only see, but to touch that brightness, that glory. It came in the beautiful lilac face of a young energetic little quarian. And that smile…that smile… Was there ever a more glorious sight in the entire universe than Tali'Zorah vas Normandy's smile? He didn't think so.
When Tali finally emerged from the clean room's shower facilities she noted the mess she had made was now gone and Garrus was sporting a pale blue hazmat suit rather than the prior white one he had previously donned. No doubt in effort to retain the environment of clean room's sanitation. Any residual elements of the solvents used to clean the biological spill or remnants of the spill itself compromised the room's safety measures.
For herself Tali wore set of medical scrubs, taking in the very rare luxury of being freed from her suit. It was the only place (outside such rooms aboard on the flotilla) she felt comfortable removing her suit. It wasn't something she had on the original Normandy, but on the wavecrest was equipped with thee R&D labs, two of them with clean rooms. Officially of course it was documented open to the science corps, however Shepard made sure Tali had access to the smallest of them almost exclusively for her private use. Not that the scientists had much use for it as the larger of the two was more efficiently placed between the labs, whereas the smallest was tucked away as if it was walk-in-closet.
If Tali was grateful before for the near exclusive use clean lab she was more so now, especially for what she had planned.
She had everything she wanted to say set in her mind, she had rehearsed each word each sentence even her body language in the shower. Now once she saw Garrus all the preparation felt as if it had been sucked out the airlock. She had nothing. No words, no asari-eqsue saunter, nothing, a blank. On top of it all she felt heat rushing to her face.
"Tali?" And he was there all of a sudden at her side.
"I had every thing I wanted to say planned out. You know I even had this whole thing planned out. A proper date… Well not this, this, another this. You know what I mean. I even downloaded some music on an OSD but I didn't know what you liked. And now I'm babbling like an idiot." She lowered her head, her silver eyes glued to her bare feet and the white tiles beneath them.
Garrus smiled. "You're cute when you're flustered." he moved forward and raised her chin. "Tali, it's okay."
She shook her head implying she disagreed. "I…I want to feel your skin against mine." she uttered so softly it was but a wisp of sound.
Without a word or question whether or not his quarian love was sure-was positive the former C-Sec officer watched as Tali unlocked the seals of his glove to the suit. His blue eyes danced in astonishment as watched her take his taloned fingers within her own, smaller one. Her three fingers were smaller, more delicate than his and much softer. He half expected them to be as calloused as any other engineers then chastised himself for the thought. Of course they would be soft, they had been hidden and protected behind gloves for the majority of his love's life. There was no blemish, no scarring, they were perfect.
With two fingers she traced the back of his hand, first along his fingers, across the knuckles and drew small circles along the hand itself to his thumb. Softly as a spoken whisper she turned his hand over and begin her path anew along his palm, wrist, thumb and fingers. The gentle touch almost tickled if not for the sensuousness of her skin upon his.
He drew his breath in quick and felt the whole of his body respond. He swallowed hard and lost himself in the glory of silver eyes and a hesitant smile of on ruby lips. He almost whimpered when Tali let go of his hand for the want of her simple touch. He watched those magical digits reach for his respirator and unfasten the straps that bound it around head. Without ceremony Tali tossed it to the floor where it bounced once and rolled across the tiles in a lopsided journey to rest against her face plate that was still laying on the tiles.
A pink tongue darted viper swift out of satin lips before they touched his cleft leonine muzzle.
The touch was bubbles in champagne; it buckled the knees and warmed the belly. The kiss stopped the heart and blocked air from the lungs. It was stars and bliss there was no other touch in the all the worlds in the universe but this one.
MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME
No one listened to her. No one moved to stop this. So many lives lost, so much death, if they had only listened. Why didn't they listen?! She knew they were coming, had foreseen it within the beacons. She screamed until she was hoarse but they wouldn't budge. She pushed them as hard as she could-
Now the galaxy was burning.
Fire. A flood of flames, all-devouring—
The world was consumed by it, swallowed whole by the infernal plague. Choking black smoke billowed above her head in a cloying haze.
That land, the city once beautiful so ancient, so old now torn apart by jagged metallic teeth, biting in to the flesh and bone earth. Screams rose up, screams of the world, screams of the hundred billion souls ripped from life. Hundreds, thousand of bodies impaled upon spikes, ribbons of blood coiling around the dragon's teeth like macabre garlands.
Swarms of biting clouds of insectiod minions swirled around organic life, stilling bodies in terrified muted screams. They were coming—the slaves of the Reaper-harvesting, collecting leaving none. Warriors cried out in battle, in death, millions dead already. There was no end to the swarms, no end to the collectors. Amongst them hulking abominations, prowling, devouring tearing—destroying-ripping life and soul from victims leaving only husks, who rose up and hunted their own, betraying them to their new masters-the Reapers.
-and craa-ack!
She froze, and heard a massive shattering of stone followed by the thick, ponderous steps of someone who must be huge more massive than any krogan moving through the streets past the tenements, the sounds deliberate and thundering.
He must weigh a ton, oh Goddess tell me that wasn't a wall being torn apart—
She shot a look down the small alleyway between the gutted rubble of the buildings. She could feel the violence radiating off him in invisible waves. She could just make out sickly gray blur of a face, the sloping skull—and quite suddenly, she was certain that he was a monster, a killer with black mulish fists, each as big as a turian's head. In one meaty paw he held a broken-desecrated blue body. If she could just make out the face.
No-she didn't want to see it, didn't want know. Even though she knew who it was the monster tore apart. Her heart hammered flooding her ears with the pulse of her own blood.
Shoot! Shoot it!
The creature took one massive step toward her on tree-trunk legs, and she heard the crunch of pulverized stone beneath its clawed feet, and saw the black eyes, black and rimmed with red. Like lava-filled pits in a misshapen white boulder, blank but not at all blind, its gaze found hers-and it raised one meaty clenched fist, the threat unmistakeable.
-firefirefirefirefirefire-
She raised her hands sending out shockwaves. One, two, three explosive bursts of biotic energy and she saw the impact—a flap of its skin blew from its chest just above the diaphragm, the second wave slicing though one side of the neck—and it took another step, not a flicker of expression passing over its rough-hewn features, the fist still raised, seeking a target, seeking to crush—
The black, smoking hole in its chest and neck were not bleeding.
Oh SHIT!
In a rush of adrenaline-boosted dread, she rose aimed her hands at the creature's heart and sent warps repeatedly, the giant taking another step, striding into the stream of explosive biotic fire without flinching-
-and she lost track of the shots, unable to believe it could still be coming, less than ten feet away as the biotic energy streamed from her into its mammoth chest—
-A singularity and it still kept coming-
From the haze of smoke and forest of carcasses strode the smaller shape-recognizable, a huntress.
Shepard stopped and stood before her. "You'd better wake up now before it really gets bad."
Aria's eyes snapped open.