Zugzwang:

Chapter 4

I finished putting my hair into a braided updo before applying makeup to my face. Today, Ludwig and I will meet Italy at the airport and then fly to Japan for the meeting. While I knew the Japanese were allies with the Germans and Italians they were extremely hostile to other countries in this time period, especially to other Asians and Americans. The fact that I'm American and meeting with a hostile nation makes me sick to my stomach. Once more, I thank God that I am fluent in German or, God help me, I might have been either shipped to a concentration camp or dead. While Germany is not yet at war with America it's possible that I might have been suspected of spying since I knew about the personifications.

After putting on lipstick, I smoothed my skirt then grabbed my new suitcase and purse. I wore a black suit with an iron cross pinned on the left side of my jacket and a silver eagle on the right side. A Nazi armband had came with the outfit but I burned it in the fireplace when Ludwig was out. If he points it out, I'll tell him that the outfit didn't come with an armband. I remembered how much my hands trembled when I held that vile piece of fabric. The 'people' that wore these symbols had humiliated and murdered my great grandparents along with my grandmother's friends. She had barely escaped to America. After being coerced by her parents to get out of Europe and leave them behind. I would never wear a swasika. Not if I can help it.

When I got downstairs, Ludwig was wearing the green army uniform that was often seen in the Hetalia episodes. Even though his country had caused such damage, it didn't prevent the two of us from becoming very close and I will always be grateful to Ludwig for what he's done for me.

He told me I looked magnificent. I forced a proud smile and thanked him, telling Ludwig he also looked great. Even though I felt like a rat in a monster's clothes. It was sickening. Twice I had to force the bile back down my throat during the ride to the airport. I barely slept at all last night with various negative emotions swirling in the pit of my stomach. I've already had insomnia before being transferred into this universe but I usually fell asleep by 12:30 but ever since I've been in Germany, I passed out at ungodly hours. I've used makeup to hide the dark circles under my eyes and they had looked even darker this morning. Nearly a faint black because I kept blinking in and out of sleep last night. Coffee and nerves are what kept me sober during the day.

I started throwing up in the mornings after Ludwig told me we were going to Japan. I could barely eat without feeling nausea so I often told Ludwig that I would have breakfast at the desk he had put in my room and when Ludwig was a good distance away I would flush the food down the toilet. I've had constant stomach ailments for the past few days but I never told Ludwig. It was nothing serious and he already spent a lot of money getting things I needed I didn't want him to waste anymore on me.

When we arrived, a bright colored blur shouting "Germany!"zoomed over to us and crashed into Ludwig. He barely flinched but he looked quite irritated. Italy tightly embraced Ludwig as said man tried to pry the Italian off of him.

"Guten tag, Italy." Germany grumbled. Italy's attention then turned to me.

"Ciao Bella!" He greeted with even higher enthusiasm. "Mi dispiace. I didn't see you there! Are you going to Japan too?"

He spoke so fast I almost couldn't keep up but I returned the smile and replied. "Si. Sto andando in Giappone anche." Yes. I'm going to Japan too.

I meant to reply in English but I found myself speaking a language I never learned. Before I could react, I found myself in a tight embrace and I let out a noise of surprise.

"She speaks Italian too! This is wonderful and you have Italian ancestry on your mother's side!" Italy exclaimed in delight.

"Italy! Don't suffocate her like zhat!" Germany scolded, prying Italy off of me. "Es tut mir leid, Miriam. He can be little too..." He struggled to find the right word but I shook my head.

"It's fine, Ludwig." I cut in with the accent I've been using for the past weeks. "I don't really mind. I was just surprised is all."

As we made our way to Germany's private plane, Italy surprisingly proved to be nice company. Despite his happy go lucky personality he was also very sweet. Like a puppy. I told him about my maternal grandfather was where I got my Italian ancestry and the story I told Ludwig about me being Swiss and how he took me in when I had nothing. I was taken aback when Italy then started bawling and hugged me in a breath stealing embrace.

"Oh poor Bella! Why would someone want to be so mean to you!" He cried after I told him the fake story of how I was mugged before Germany took me in.

"Get off of her you imbecile!" Ludwig shouted, trying to pull Italy off of me for the second time that day but the Italian was stronger than he looked. It took ten minutes to loosen his grip. I wiped the stain on my shoulder with a handkerchief and pushed a stray lock of hair that had gotten loose behind my ear due to Italy's unexpected attack.

This was going to be a long trip.

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The flight had lasted for eleven hours and fifty three minutes. We left at 7:30 am and it was 7:23 pm when we landed. The arguments between Germany and Italy started off as amusing but after a while it started to get annoying. I tried to take a nap to catch up on the sleep I was losing at night but then Italy started complaining about how bad the food on the plane was. I eventually got a headache but I managed to finally get some sleep although occasionally I would hear Italy say something and Germany hushing him.

A few minutes before we landed, I took out my mirror to check my makeup and hair. As I was checking for loose strands of hair, both Germany and Italy tried to assure me I looked fine.

"Don't worry Bella, you look perfect!"

"Ja, you don't need to vorry so much."

I couldn't help it. I have a bad habit of checking how I look when I'm nervous. As we got off the plane, I went to get my suitcase but Germany held it for me. I liked how courteous men were during this time period. It was all about yourself during my time.

A Japanese man greeted us outside of the plane and escorted us to a cab. Italy started rambling on the way to where we would meet Japan and Germany either lectured him to behave or order him to shut up. Oh dear God, please make it stop!

When we arrived, I thanked every deity I could think of. I could barely feel my legs anymore.

"Miriam, vould you mind waiting out here while I talk vith Japan?" Germany asked before whispering. "And could you keep an eye on Italy? I vill try to hurry."

I nodded and he went inside. I stood on the steps and watched as Italy wandered over to a group of Japanese girls. So far this was the most similar thing I've seen to the anime show. Episode 4 of the first season.

"Do you speak of Itary?" I suddenly heard a Japanese voice approaching. I turned to see Germany with the personification of Japan. "Arright, I am in agreement. Arthough, I am curious."

Japan looked to where Italy was talking to the group of Japanese girls.

"He surery is not the obviousry suspicious character over there, is he?" He asked. I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

"I don't vant to believe it either but zhat's him." Germany answered. At that point, a Japanese guard approached Italy and the girls with a deep scowl plastered on his face. I immediately turned to Germany.

"Germany, you should go get him before he gets in anymore trouble." I ushered him in Italy's direction before turning to Japan. "Gomenasai, Nihon-San. Italy means no harm. He's just unaware of...some cultural differences."

His impassive expression didn't change. "That is quite alright. May I ask who you are, Miss?"

"Oh! My apologies. My name is Miriam Toller." I introduced myself with a bow. "I am Germany's assistant."

"Preased to meet you, Torrer-San." Japan said, bowing. I may have heard his speech many times on a screen but I couldn't help but find how difficult it was for him to pronounce the letter L quite funny. I fought against a grin at his speech. Germany then walked over while dragging Italy with him, muttering curses in German under his breath.

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Japan had invited us inside and we were all sitting under a kotatsu while he signed some papers Germany had given him. A black cat had curled up next to me and purred as I pet it. I felt a tug on my chest as I was reminded of Simon. I hadn't realized how homesick I was until this cat approached me.

Germany was next to me on the left, Japan to my right, and Italy was napping in front of me. I watched as Japan put a tangerine on his head and a white cat next to him meowed.

"I have signed the paperwork but he appears to be sreeping." Japan stated, gazing at the Italian.

"Ja, zhat is kind of his thing." Germany said, no looking up from his book. I scoffed. A few awkward moments passed before a new topic was brought up.

"Torrer-San, how did you come to know Germany-San." Japan asked. "This is the first time I am hearing of one of us having an assistant."

Germany responded before I could answer.

"My idiot of a brother told Miriam about us vhen he got drunk and I found her near my house, sick and unconscious."

"It's true." I added. "Had Ludwig not found me I probably would have died in that alleyway. A group of thugs snatched my possessions and then my shoes to further humiliate me. Ludwig has been taking care of me ever since and I decided to repay him by becoming his personal assistant."

"Interesting." Was all Japan said after a moment of silence.

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When Kiku Honda, or Japan, first laid eyes on Miriam Toller, he was surprised that a human girl would be attending the meeting as Germany's assistant. A nation would sometimes be accompanied by their boss but there wasn't one that ever brought a personal assistant.

Germany also seemed to be attached to the girl. The way he seemed so protective of her was like that of an older brother. Japan could see it whenever Germany yelled at Italy for touching the girl too much. Every nation tried not to get too close to humans in fear of the pain of grieving them after that person dies. Countries were immortal, humans were not.

The Toller girl also had a foreign accent that could pass off as any Western European but despite how real it sounded, Kiku felt as though there was something off about it. Like it wasn't her real voice. She seemed to be fluent in more than two languages when she spoke with either Germany or Italy. She spoke very convincing German and Italian and always made an effort to speak his native language with what little words she knew.

Kiku was pleased that a Western human was making an effort to learn about his language. He understood that it could be difficult for many but the girl always tried to speak properly.

To Japan, Miriam Toller was an enigma. Despite her charming personality and intelligence, the Japanese man couldn't help but feel as if the girl was hiding something. Kiku could always sense the mood of everything around him and Miriam's mood seemed unreal to him.

He could sense her anxiety whenever she pretended to straighten her clothes or check her appearance. Whenever she made eye contact Kiku could see that her eyes didn't match her facial expression. They had many emotions within them. Fear, sorrow, and...pity?

If Japan had to conclude anything, he would believe that Miriam Toller knew something that he, Germany, and Italy did not. But that wasn't all. Japan also thought that there was something else going on but he couldn't tell what it was.

Kiku would continue to observe her from now on.

Later that night, Japan showed his three guests to their rooms.

"This wirr be your room, Torrer-San." He said after leading Germany and Italy to their rooms.

"Arigatou gozaimasu." Miriam thanked Japan with a bow before asking. "Nihon-San, do you have trouble pronouncing the letter L?"

Kiku felt his cheeks burn with an upcoming blush.

"Err, sometimes." He admitted, gazing down in embarrassment. "My sincerest aporogies."

"It's alright." Miriam reassured him. "If you would like I can help you make your speech a little better."

He gave a slight nod. "Arigatou Torr...I mean, Tor-Torle

He struggled to pronounce her name.

"Why don't you just call me Miriam?" She offered.

"Miriam." Kiku tested the name on his tongue. The sound of her first name reminded him of water flowing down a river. It could have been a trick of the light but for a moment the rouge on Miriam's cheeks seemed to darken. He immediately snapped out of his musings.

"I-if you wourd rike, M-Miri-San, the women's hot spring is down that way to the right if you wish to bathe." He stuttered. "Oyasuminasai. G-goodnight."

With that, he quickly walked towards his room.

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I watched as Japan retreated to his room in a hurry. Did I embarrass him too much? Perhaps it's too soon to use my first name? Then I realized that he called me Miri-San. Not Miriam-San. Is my name too long? I don't think so, I've read about Japanese names that were more complicated than mine. I shrugged it off as a language difference but decided to apologize about it tomorrow. A hot soak sounds amazing right now.

I went into my room to wash the makeup from my face and redid my hair before slipping on a robe. I was relieved to be the only woman in the building so the chances of me being disturbed were very slim. I grabbed a towel and headed to where Japan had directed me to go.

The hot spring had a tall wooden fence surrounding it and the steam felt nice against my face. I set my towel down and removed the robe before sinking into the water. I sighed into the warmth and leaned against the wall. This was beyond amazing. It was heavenly.

I suddenly heard voices over the fence towards the men's hot spring. I recognized the Italian accent as Italy and then I heard Japan's voice respond. But I didn't care about what they were saying. I didn't want anything to take my mind off of the bliss I was in at the moment.

…...In the men's hot spring...

"Ciao Japan!" Italy greeted, slinking into the water. "What do you think of Miriam? Isn't she pretty?"

Japan was taken aback by the last question and he felt his cheeks burn. "M-Miriam-San? Hai...I suppose she is..."

"What am I saying? Of course she is!" Italy babbled on. "After all, she has Italian ancestry and she has German ancestry too so she's also very smart!"

German ancestry too? Japan wondered. "Itary-Kun, is Miriam-San not German?"

"No she isn't." Italy replied. "I thought she was too but on the way here she told me that she was born in Switzerland and moved to Germany after the poor Bella lost her mother. Oh, poor Bella! Why is the world so cruel?!"

As Italy cried and continued to rant, Japan processed the information he was given. Miriam-San is Swiss? But I thought that they were neutral. Why would Miriam-San go to Germany when she is likely to be safer in her home country? A place less likely to be involved in a war.

AN: Thank you, those who have been reading this story so far. I've decided to post chapters on weekends so I can have extra time since I have school. Reviews give me inspiration to keep writing so keep it up and I will do the same! Also, if one of you guess what the cause of Miriam's symptoms are, I'll reward you with an early update!

Translations:

Guten tag: Good day

Mi dispiace: I'm sorry

Gomenasai: I'm sorry

Nihon: Japan

Arigatou gozaimasu: Thank you very much

Arigatou: Thank you

Oyasuminasai: Goodnight (formal)