Author's Note: This chapter switches between first person point of view and third person point of view. The first person point of view is from Pan's point of view and will be in italics. The third person point of view will be in normal font. Thank you!
Where am I? The air around me is so thick and dense that I can barely breathe. My lungs and throat feels like I'm inhaling flames. I opened my eyes only to see nothing surrounding me. I placed my hand in front of my face but couldn't see it. The ground below my bare feet is freezing cold and feels like I'm standing on shards of glass. Then out of nowhere the ground I was standing on disappeared into thin air. My body begins to plummet, I struggled to fly but it was like my body just wouldn't move.
Above me in the distance I could see a faint glimmer. It was almost like light reflecting off glass. The longer I fell, the closer it seemed like the glimmer was falling towards me. I tried squinting to see if it helped me to figure out what that was above me. Was it mirrors? I'm almost certain its mirrors. In almost the blink of an eye the mirrors were falling at rapid speeds towards me. They're going to smash into me. I try to move but once again my body fails to move. Right when the mirrors are about to hit me, I close my eyes and brace myself for impact. A few minutes passed, where was the impact? My body should be stinging and aching from shards of glass. I began to open my eyes and my body jerks to a halt and I hit the ground.
Through my closed eye lids I can see a bright glow. Slowly, I open my eyes to find the source of the light. All around me is thousands of mirrors. In each mirror I could see a memory that I had experienced. Then there was some with scenes that I had no idea what they were. The mirrors were all floating, each one surrounded with an eccentric golden frame. I reach out to touch one of the mirrors. My fingers were centimeters away from touching the mirror when the mirror jerks violently away and another moves into its place.
In the new mirror, I can make out the mountains that I grew up in. There are white chairs lined up in rows with a large white sheet in between the chairs. At the end of the long white sheet was an arch way covered in my favorite flowers, white lilies. People began to sit in the chairs, but I couldn't make out their faces. They were all dressed in elegant wear. Then people began appearing at the archway: men dressed in white on the right side and women dressed in pale yellow on the left side. Just like the others, their faces were blurred out. Elegant music began to play and everyone rose up. A woman in a long white dress began walking down the aisle. This must be someone's wedding. But who's? I've never been to a wedding.
The mirrors began spinning again and another one appeared before me. This one was different than all the others. Unlike the others, this one didn't have a memory. This mirror was a normal mirror, my own reflection staring back. My hair hung all around my face. I was wearing a white knee length, spaghetti strapped gown. My feet and arms were bare. The girl staring back at me, had the same emotionless eyes. She had the same blank expression on her face. I cocked my head the side and the girl in the mirror did the same. I raised my hand to touch the mirror, my fingers grazing against the smooth cold surface. I traced a circle along its cool surface. It was just a simple mirror, nothing special. I began to pull my hand away when the mirror's surface began to ripple. It was like the ripple of a pond when you throw a rock into it. I pressed my hand against the mirror once more. This time my hand passed through the mirror's surface. I jerked my hand back in amazement. That had just been solid moments ago. I stood there for a few minutes before I decided to put my hand back through the mirror. Just like before, my hand passed through the mirror. The edges rippling like water as I stuck my hand up to my wrist in. A cool breeze rushed by my hand on the other side. Was there something on the other side of this mirror? I begin to pull my hand back out of the mirror, but it wouldn't budge. I struggled trying to break my arm free when something grabbed me. I began to panic, but before I could scream the thing that had a hold of me pulled me into the mirror.
When I broke through on the other side, I was standing in a forest of some kind. I knew this forest, I had been here before. I just couldn't place where I knew this forest from. In the distance I could see smoke rising above the tree tops. Something inside was telling me to move closer to the smoke. Against my better judgement, I decided to head towards the smoke.
I could hear birds chirping in the forest surrounding me. Squirrels scurried in the tree branches above my head. A cool breeze whipped through the forest, causing chill bumps to rise on my skin. I didn't know why but the forest was causing an intense calmness to rush through my body. It was so peaceful in this forest. If I could never leave this place I wouldn't.
The closer I got too the smoke, the darker the sky begin to grow. By the time I reached a break in the trees the sky had a purplish glow to it. I froze when I got through the clearing of the trees. It wasn't possible! This wasn't really happening, there was no way. I closed my eyes, hoping it would disappear but when I reopened them it was still there. Standing in front of me was me, only younger. My younger self was staring at our old house. My light blue backpack was hanging off one shoulder, my gloved hand gripping tightly at the strap. The trade mark orange bandanna tied snuggly on my head. Slowly she started walking towards the house, she made it to the front door and stopped. Quickly, I ran up behind her. What made her stop? She was staring wide eye at the front door. My eyes followed what she was staring at. The door was cracked slightly opened, which was unusual. My mom was strict with keeping the doors closed, so bugs wouldn't fly into the house. But that wasn't what had caught my younger self's attention. On the door, below the door handle was something red smeared across the side.
I immediately froze. I remembered this now, this was the night of the accident. I had just gotten home from staying with Bulla for the night when I found them. I clenched my hands tightly into fists. This couldn't be happening, I wasn't going to relive this! I told myself years ago I would stop reliving this.
The younger version of myself, slowly opened the door and walked in. There was no way I was following her. I wasn't about to relive the worse moment in my life. I stood firmly on the ground. But something was pulling me forward, I tried to stop but my feet were moving without my consent. I was walking into the living room without any desire too. On the ground I could see a large trail of blood leading to my father's office. The living room was absolutely wrecked. The sofa was laying on its back. Books from my father's bookshelves laid scattered on the floor. I could see broken plates in the doorway of the kitchen. My younger self was nowhere in sight, but I knew where she was. My feet began moving down the hallway, the trail of blood getting thicker the further I moved down the hallway. At the end of the hallway stood my younger self. The back pack that had been on my shoulder now lay discarded on the ground. The door to my father's office was closed but bloody handprints covered the white door. My younger self grabbed the door knob and began to turn it. NO! DON'T DO IT! I screamed in my head. I took off running down the hallway, trying to stop myself from witnessing that. But I was too late. She turned the door knob and swung the door open and froze. Tears began filling mine and my younger self's eyes.
"Mama…" My younger self whimpered. I didn't need to look into the room to know what she was staring at. On the ground in my father's office, laid the slaughtered forms of both my parents in their own pools of blood. Outside the room I could hear some shuffling around and men's voices but almost as soon as I heard them, they disappeared.
My younger self rushed into the room, screaming for our parents as she done so. I knew that what she was doing was pointless. They were long gone, with no hope of saving them. But I knew she was going to try her best to save them. By the end of it, I would be covered in their blood for nothing. I could hear her sobs and screams coming from the room. The tears that had started filling my own eyes, finally broke over. I dropped down to my knees and began sobbing. My own screams mimicking the screams of my younger self.
I could hear faint male voices in the backgrounds. I didn't turn around to see them, I knew who they belonged too. A breeze brushed by me, as the owners of the voices rushed into the room to my younger self. It was Vegeta, my Uncle Goten, and Trunks. I could hear my younger self screaming to get away and leave me alone as Trunks tried to get me away from my parents. Uncle Goten had dropped to his knees and was sobbing now. Vegeta stood in the doorway, his arms crossed and emotionless expression on his face.
I raised my head up to the door way. I could see my younger self kneeling over my parents, absolutely covered in blood. Trunks was trying to pull me off of them but, I just kept resisting. Then, Vegeta walked over to myself and Trunks. He placed a hand on my younger self's shoulder. She looked up to him, sniffling but not crying. Even in a tragedy, I refused to show any signs of weakness in front of Vegeta. Trunks stepped back in shock. But then my younger self's resolve broke and she jumped into Vegeta's arms and began sobbing into his chest. Vegeta just wrapped his arms around her and held her closer as she sobbed, covering his red tank top in our parent's blood and our own tears.
Then, in a flash the scene before me disappeared. Instead of that gruesome night, was a dark figure in a black cloak. The dark figure stretched its arm out towards me, pointing a long bony finger at me.
"Your fault…" The figure's deep voice cracked. "All your fault…" The figure began to taunt me over and over again. Repeating those two phrases over and over again.
"No, no…noo! It wasn't my fault." I screamed and placed my hands over my ears, trying to block out the voice. But it was to no avail. I could still hear the figures raspy voice taunting me. I dropped down to my knees, pressing my hands harder onto my ears, desperate to block out the cloaked figure's taunts.
"PAN! PAN! WAKE UP! You're having a nightmare!" Vegeta yelled, shaking the violently thrashing younger saiyan.
Vegeta had woken up to go get some water when he heard Pan screaming. His instincts immediately kicking in, he rushed to her room thinking the worse. He almost broke down her door trying to get to her. When he finally got into her room he found Pan laying on the floor, screaming and crying in her sleep. She was screaming "no" over and over again. He tried shaking her again to get her to wake up. But she refused to wake up. He started to leave, realizing his attempts were pointless, but decided he couldn't just leave her laying on the ground screaming. So he walked over to her and picked her up. Pan almost immediately stopped thrashing about and screaming. Vegeta just looked at her in shock but sighed in relief. At least, he had finally gotten her to stop screaming. He walked over to her bed, with Pan held close to his chest. He laid Pan gently down onto the bed. He pulled her blankets up over her body and turned to exit the room.
Pan began thrashing around in her bed once more as slight whimpers began to escape her lips. Vegeta turned back around to her, what had made her stop thrashing about? He walked back over to the distressed young woman. Her head was shaking back and forth, slinging her long ebony hair into her face. Her fists where grasped tightly into the sheets and her legs kicked furiously at the covers over her legs. Her face was streaked with dried tears. Vegeta sat down next to her. A thought crossed his mind, had he caused her to stop panicking? He pulled Pan into his arms once more, the side of her head resting on his bare chest and her left arm stretched around his waist. Like before, almost instantly she stopped thrashing around.
Her pained expression resting into a peaceful somber expression. He looked down at the girl laying still in his arms. He watched as her chest slowly rose and fell with her now calmed breathing. Her mouth was parted slightly, a little bit of drool falling out of her mouth onto Vegeta's bare chest. She looked so small and peaceful in his arms. It was almost like she belonged there in his arms. Wait, had he just thought that about the brat? Well, she was beautiful anyone with eyes could see that and he wasn't blind. But then again, he wondered why had she stopped thrashing about when he held her close? Pan began to stir in his sleep, tearing Vegeta from his thoughts. It didn't look like he was going to be able to leave anytime soon. So Vegeta, got comfy and settled in for the night.
The figure's voice kept screaming in my head. Blaming me for my parent's death. I kept screaming back at the figure that it wasn't my fault. I wasn't to blame for my parent's death. Then there was nothing but silence. The voice had stopped. I slowly pulled my hands away from ears and opened my eyes. The figure had disappeared.
A warm, peaceful feeling began to wash over me. It was almost like two arms had wrapped tightly around me and was holding me close. The feeling was familiar to me, I had experienced this calming feeling before but I couldn't figure out where. I laid down on the ground, enjoying the feeling. It was just like I was laying in someone's arms, I could even feel the slight rise and fall of the person's chest. It was so relaxing. I closed my eyes and laid there.
It felt almost like I was about to drift away, when suddenly the warm and peaceful feeling was gone. Now, a harsh chill had settle deep into my bones. I began to shiver as something began to grip tight around my neck, arms, and legs pulling me down onto my back. I tried to scream but my mouth wouldn't open. Then, the figure from earlier appeared again. Just like before his hand stretched out before, pointing and taunting me once more. Telling me how it was my fault all over again. I tried to scream, tried everything to get it to stop. The figure moved closer to me. It was now right beside. It outstretched its hand grabbed a hold of my chin, the figure's long nail digging into my check. I could feel the nail cutting into my flesh, I wanted to scream out as blood poured from the cut but my mouth wouldn't open. It pulled back its hand and moved down to my chest, cutting a line across my chest. The stinging as its nail sliced across my chest was unbearable. I needed to scream. I tried to break free of whatever had me held down but struggling was useless. The figure pulled its hand back away and started to lean in towards my ear. I could feel the being's breathe breathing down my neck. I began to breathe rapidly, what was going to happen. It raised its other hand up high, revealing a large dagger.
"Pay…you must pay…" It hissed at me, the dagger began its decent towards my chest. Its target being my heart. I was trying to thrash around, doing everything I could to get away from the figure. Realizing that my fighting was pointless, I closed my eyes and braced myself for impact. But the impact never came, instead the amazing warm and peaceful feeling was returning. I could feel the arms embrace once more and then rising and falling of a chest. I remained tense, not wanting to relax for fear that it would disappear again. But after a while I finally began to relax and felt the most at peace for the first time in over eight years.