Gajevy Week '17 Prompt; Longing
He shouldn't be feeling like this. It wasn't right, let alone permitted. It took everything he had to keep his emotions at bay anytime he saw her, whether that was across the castle grounds or when she was just a simple touch away.
But tonight, he'd never felt further away from her; torture, pure and absolute torture is what he was going through on this night. Any other time, he enjoyed being assigned her personal guard for the evening. The opportunity to stand close enough to smell the subtle scents of lavender and jasmine that radiated from her, to hear her laugh, to speak and converse with her, to watching her emotions dance across her face as she read her favorite books under the tree in the garden.
He gazed at her from a respectful distance away, but when the prince laid his hand at the small of her back, his gloved hand fisted at his side and the other gripped the hilt of his sword in a white knuckled embrace. He wanted, more than anything, to be that man at her side, to be able to walk with her side by side, and above all be the one to make her smile.
Her smile. He could tell from where he stood that it was warm and sincere, but lacked that happiness that he was used to seeing when he was with her. He hadn't realized he was practically seething until she chanced a look behind her. Whatever she had seen made her eyes go wide and quickly turn back around. Gajeel composed himself and noticed she sidestepped away from the prince, allowing the hand that had been resting against her back to drop away.
He was a fool to think she had done that on his behalf, but he couldn't help but notice how her posture had relaxed since moving away from the prince. Gajeel had never seen this visiting royal before, he knew the day would come when the princess would be married off for the sake of an alliance or growth in political power, anything but what she had truly desired: love. She had said that much to him during one of their conversations. He had joked with her about whisking her away to a place where they would never be found, he would never forget the light in her eyes and the smile she had given him that day.
His heart squeezed, no other pain could dull the ache he felt when it came to his princess. She had carved a hole deep inside from the first moment their eyes met. Her deep, bright, honey colored eyes had captured his heart in an instant and without a doubt, he knew he would never truly get it back.
Without realizing it, he had managed to follow the two royals to the beach, only when the prince started shucking off his shoes and hiking up his pants to wade out into the waves, did he hear the sob escape from her lips.
She was terrified of the ocean. Years ago, she had lost both her parents to the unruly sea and ever since she refused to be near it. How he had allowed himself to become so distracted by his thoughts that she had actually ended up this close to the water, he couldn't explain at present.
Disregarding his orders to maintain his distance, he moved towards them, scooping her into his arms mere moments before she collapsed on the sand. Relishing in the warmth of her body held tightly against his chest, he turned to face the prince.
"The princess is not feeling well, this visit is over."
He didn't allow the posh prince a chance to reply before turning around and swiftly leaving the beach.
Her tears dissipated as they neared her quarters. He'd never been this far into the castle before but he knew exactly where her room was, he had stood below her window in the garden more nights than he could count.
"I'm sorry." he whispered, his body shook with the sobs it so badly wanted to release, "I nearly failed you tonight, I have no excuse for my actions or lack thereof."
Securing her with one arm, he pushed open the door to her room with his free hand, and carried her inside to stand in front of her bed. Ever so gently he reluctantly set her down amongst the silk blankets and took a step back, dropping to one knee and bowing his head.
He felt her hands against his cheeks as she silently urged him to look up at her, "The fault is not your own. I was distracted as well."
Gajeel wrapped his hands around hers, her hands were soft and warm, untouched by the hard labors his own had faced. Just another testament to how different they really were. Moving them away from his cheeks, but in no hurry to completely let her go, he met her gaze.
"My knight, you looked so sad this evening," she frowned, her eyes still red from crying.
"I'm fine, princess. Forgive me."
Levy shook her head, her smile sad as she gripped his hands tighter, "There's nothing to forgive, you were not at fault and you ended up saving me regardless."
He'd allow himself this much, just this once. Throwing caution to the wind, he lifted her cream colored hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss to her skin, her sudden intake of breath did not go unnoticed.
"I will never let you come to harm, I swear it on my life. My life is yours and yours alone," his oath went far deeper, but he'd already crossed far too many lines tonight.
He dropped her hand with heartbreaking gentleness and with one final bow he moved to leave her quarters.
"Will you stay?"
He paused just inside the threshold and turned, she was standing a few steps away from him, her expression crestfallen.
"I will stand watch outside your room, all night," he answered with a smile, his heart racing at the double meaning in his words that would never come to light.
With the door closed behind him, he turned, placing a single hand flat against the door, resting his head just above it. He closed his eyes and through his imagination he saw her mirrored image on the opposite side of the door, his heart was a cruel thing to play these tricks.
A whisper screamed through the night, "I've been watching you too."
I plan on doing more Gajevy Week prompts, but not all of them. The ones I do share will be posted here, under my oneshots. I also kinda fell in love with this story and I think I might expand on it...what are your thoughts? Please share them with me!