Chapter 15: Sea of Guilt

"'I'm sorry…'" Kairi muttered, thinking over Namine's words. "What does she mean by that?" She turned to Sora. "Do you think she'll be okay?"

Sora paused, his stomach churning. Technically, it was him that didn't care, even though he had been accusing Riku of it this entire time. But now, he actually felt bad, and was worried too. "Riku'll take good care of her," he said after a moment.

"Yeah, that's true," Kairi laughed. She had, however, heard the slight edge in Sora's voice, and her smile fell. "Are you okay?" she asked him.

"Of course!" Sora said, rather quickly.

Kairi eyed him suspiciously, only half believing him. There was something different about the tone of his voice. He sounded almost… bitter, as opposed to the carefree and slightly clueless attitude he normally had. Her eyes narrowed with worry. "Why are you and Riku fighting?" she asked quietly.

Sora, who had been trying to appear carefree as he usually was, gave up the act, and his eyes formed a glare. "I'm sick of him always telling me what to do…" he muttered.

"What are you talking about?" Kairi asked, confused. She thought back over what had just happened in the past ten or so minutes. She couldn't remember much of Sora and Riku's argument, as she had been worrying about Namine. But then, she remembered something. As Riku and Namine were leaving, Sora had remained silent. He had just stood there, staring at them glaring at them.

"Sora's got it in his head that Riku doesn't care about anyone but me," Namine had said.

Kairi swallowed, the realization slowly sneaking up on her. When did this start? she asked herself. Her mind flitted back over those last few das on the islands. Sora had been so distant, so confused. Now…

She looked up at him. He didn't look confused now. He seemed so sure.

Something had changed.

"Sora…" she whispered.

He turned away from her. Something about how she ha looked at him just then… it hurt him. His heart suddenly ached, and his mind was thrown into turmoil.

He wanted to be better than Riku.

He wanted to go back home.

And, to do both, he had to help Maleficent gain access Kingdom Hearts.

At least, that was what the darkness inside of him was telling him. It was screaming at him, telling him that; yes! This was the right way to do things.

But the light inside him was telling him otherwise. His light, which his darkness had been suppressing for a while now, had risen up inside of him suddenly, and it was telling him that he was wrong.

But he wasn't listening. He was so mad at Riku, so sick of being the weaker one. And with these thoughts sprouting back up in him, the darkness was able to get a foothold in his heart once again. And it was smarter this time, going about it in a way that Kairi wouldn't notice. Because the darkness knew, that if Kairi noticed, Sora would be harder to hold onto.

Before, the darkness had taken the form of angry confusion. A confused Sora was easier to goad into fighting. However, the bitterness that came with that threw Kairi off, and if Kairi knew something was up, she could easily talk some sense into Sora. So, this time, the darkness took the form of a cocky confidence. All though that was a confidence that didn't quite belong in Sora, it was at least more believable, and would hopefully fool Kairi.

"C'mon," Sora said, a grin spreading across his face. "I'll take you to where we're staying until we can go home."

"Where is that?" Kairi asked slowly. Sora's sudden change in personality had thrown her off, but she was happy to see that normal upbeat attitude of his. Though, something didn't seem quite right…

"You'll see!" Sora laughed, excitement growing in his eyes.

xxx

She was restless, the warped memories invading her every thought. She slept, but the dreams were terrible. She awoke, only once, searching for her sketchbook, which upon finding she had opened to a blank page and drawn a frantic picture, before falling back asleep. Riku hadn't noticed. He had dozed off in a chair in the corner of the room.

He was only half asleep, mind fretting over just about everything. Memories would rush back with these worries, making it seem like one long dream

"You're not the one who's supposed to protect Namine!" he shouted. "It's supposed to be me!"

He was worried, so worried about her. But until she woke up, he couldn't do anything. And it was killing him, watching her hurt without being able to do anything about it.

I told her… not to come… he thought to himself. This is all my fault… I should have pressed harder to get her home sooner.

His mind wandered again, plunging itself into his memories.

"I'm sorry…"Namine said, looking down.

"Don't be! It's not your fault" he told her.

The scene changed, he was standing in Twilight Town, as the scene from a few hours ago played out.

"Let me know if I'm getting in the way – you know, of something more important" Sora had said.

He wasn't sure what had kept him from attacking right then and there. He assumed, though, that the fact Namine had been leaning on him was part of it.

And how had he not seen it? The way she nearly fell when she tried to stand, how she kept complaining that her head hurt. He knew it had been more than a headache. And yet, somehow, he ignored it, even when she had to sit down. She hadn't been alright in Halloween Town, and she wasn't alright then.

And she's not alright now…

Back into his memories his mind did plunge.

"Is Namine here?" he had demanded, countless times from the Organization members at Castle Oblivion. All of that, just to find her, on the slim chance…

"Do you know where I could find her?" he had asked, countless times upon his arrival at Traverse Town. He had to find her, to make sure she was safe.

And yet, he had still let her come.

"I won't be in danger if you're there to protect me," she had said.

And he had believed her.

But he was wrong. He couldn't protect her from everything. He couldn't protect her from her own mind, and whatever it was doing to her. There was nothing he could do to stop that.

He blinked his eyes open, almost frantically.

"Dozed off…" he muttered to himself, before looking over at Namine. She was still asleep, though it wasn't peaceful at all. She was tossing and turning, muttering thing under her breath. He watched for a second, sorrow in his eyes, before deciding something.

He got up, dragging the chair behind him, and placed the chair next to her bed. He sat down, hoping that maybe being closer to her would calm her down. He grabbed her hand in is, squeezing it gently.

"It's alright," he told her. "I'm right here"

It didn't matter whether or not he could save her from the torment inside her own head. All that mattered was that he was there with her, so he could comfort her. She would find her own way out of it, and he would be here waiting when she did.