Chapter 37: The Burdened

Namine had had yet another meltdown. That would make three since Sora left. The one after the Marluxia Replicas, another one that happened for no discernable reason, and then this one. As usual, Riku was currently waiting for her to wake up. After a moment (and for no particular reason, as he realized when thinking back on it later) he grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

He was a bit surprised when she squeezed his hand back.

"How long have you been awake?" he asked with a small laugh.

She laughed. "A bit," she replied. "Trying to find the strength to sit up, still." She sighed. "This last meltdown really took it out of me."

"I'm sorry…" Riku muttered.

Namine sat up so she could glare at him (though she was forced to prop herself up with an elbow). "It's not your fault!" she told him firmly. "Just because you happened to be the last person to say something before the meltdown doesn't mean you triggered it. Anything can trigger them, and there's no way of knowing. So shut up and stop worrying about it!"

Riku couldn't help but smile. Namine rolled her eyes.

"Here I am trying to be angry at you, and all you can do is smile?" she said.

"Do you want me to be mad?" Riku asked.

"Well, it would be nice if you could do something besides smile," Namine replied.

Riku slowly frowned. "Okay," he muttered. "Then I will sit here and pretend that I'm actually a bit scared of you, because you're shouting."

Namine burst out laughing. "Oh, forget it!"

Riku grinned and squeezed her hand tighter.

"I'm glad to see you're okay," he whispered.

Namine shrugged. "If the meltdowns are going to be happening this frequently, I can't let them bother me, can I?" she replied.

"So you're okay?"

"I'm fine!"

"You sure?" Riku asked.

"Yes," Namine replied. "Are you okay?"

Riku frowned. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You seemed a bit freaked, that's all," Namine laughed.

"I'm fine," Riku assured her. "You don't need to worry about me. I'm perfectly okay."

Namine just smiled.

Riku stared at her for a moment, trying his best not to smile. Finally, he cracked and a grin formed on his face. "Okay," he laughed. "Now I get why you were complaining about me smiling."

Namine laughed. After a moment, though, her arm gave way and she flopped back down onto her bed. "Ow…" she muttered.

"You okay?" Riku asked.

She rolled her eyes. "I'm just fine," she told him. "Apparently I just can't sit up yet." She sighed, and then tried again, this time managing to sit up properly. "There we go…" she muttered.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Riku pressed.

Namine sighed and shook her head in disbelief. "Riku, I've told you a million times already, I'm fine."

"I'm just worried," Riku muttered. "This is the third meltdown you've had this week."

"I'm fine, honestly," Namine said.

The door opened. "Hey Riku, I'm going to Twilight Town!" someone called.

"Yeah sure, whatever," Riku replied with a wave of his hand, not turning away from Namine.

The door closed.

"Was that Joseph?" Namine asked after a moment.

"Probably," Riku shrugged.

Namine just laughed.

"What?" Riku asked, completely clueless.

Namine only continued to laugh.

"Stop laughing at me!" Riku said. But before long, he couldn't help but laugh, too.

xxx

Sora sat on one of the couches in Leon's Headquarters that evening, drinking the cup of hot chocolate he had been given. Aerith had been insisting on tea, but Cloud convinced her that hot chocolate would be better for Sora, though Sora never caught why. However, he wasn't complaining. The hot chocolate was comforting and the darkness was slowly recoiling back to its usual corners of his heart, to top things off.

He, Cloud, and Aerith were the only people in the room. Aerith had managed to convince everyone else to stay upstairs. How, Sora would never know, and he didn't really care. He was sort of enjoying the slight privacy.

"So what happened back there, exactly?" Cloud asked, sitting down on the couch across from Sora with his own cup of hot chocolate.

Sora shook his head. "You wouldn't understand," he replied. There wasn't any possible way he'd be able to explain his Shadow. He didn't even understand his Shadow. Besides, he was the only one who could see it, the only one who could hear it. They would think he was crazy.

He didn't expect what Cloud said next, though:

"That's the darkness talking," Cloud told him. "It's running from what could save you. That's what it always does."

Sora frowned, confused, wondering how and why Cloud knew that. But, he decided not question this at the moment. He sighed, and then finally spoke.

"For starters, I'm not crazy," he muttered, turning away. For some reason, it was hard for him to think when being confronted with Cloud's intense gaze. He continued, voice quiet: "I have this… Shadow following me… He's like, the embodiment of my darkness, or something."

"Embodiment of your darkness? Boy does that sound lame!"

Sora's eyes narrowed upon hearing the Shadow's voice.

"I'm what you could be, if you actually gave into the darkness," the Shadow finished, with a laugh.

"Apparently… he's what I could be if I were to give into the darkness…" Sora whispered. He shuddered slightly as he said that, not wanting to think about that thought much. "But I… I don't know…" he shook his head. "But I do know that I'm the only one who can see my Shadow, and the only one who can hear him," he said after a moment.

He turned to Cloud, who was listening to him explain with interest. Cloud nodded, urging him to keep going.

Sora sighed. "Well, my Shadow started taunting me, as he always does," he explained. "And we started arguing… and then… he began tempting the darkness in me. And I- it- I couldn't… I couldn't breathe… the darkness was-"

"You don't have to explain," Cloud said quickly. "I know what that feels like."

"You do?" Sora asked, quite surprised.

Cloud nodded. "It's happened to me before."

"When?"

Cloud turned away.

"It's not a night I like to remember…" he muttered. He might have explained more, had not the sound of shattering glass interrupted them. They both turned to the kitchen, where Aerith stood, frowning over a completely broken mug.

"Well… shoot…" she sighed, quickly gathering up the broken pieces. "That was Cid's favorite mug, too…"

"What happened?" Sora called.

"Dropped it," Aerith replied with a small laugh. "Suppose I wasn't paying attention, that's all."

Sora frowned, noticing that her hands were trembling slightly. He pondered going over there to help her, but Cloud beat him to it.

"Careful," Cloud said, taking the shards of glass from her. "You might get hurt."

"It's alright, Cloud," Aerith assured him. She glanced past Cloud and at Sora. "Sora," she called. "Do you mind getting the broom? It's over there."

Sora went over to where she was pointing, and found a broom and a dustpan within a short amount of time. He quickly handed them to Aerith, who proceeded to sweep up the few shards of glass that were on the ground. Sora frowned. He could have easily done that…

Cloud went to get his and Sora's empty mugs, and Sora turned to Aerith.

"This is random, but, are you and Cloud... like...?" he stopped there, immediately regretting asking the question. It wasn't really any of his business...

"What?" Aerith asked, a bit surprised. "Oh! You mean-" She laughed and shook her head. "No. We're not… there's nothing between us, we're just good friends." Then she smiled a little, raising her voice. "Besides, Cloud likes Tifa~!"

"Do not," Cloud muttered, as he returned with the mugs.

Aerith laughed good-naturedly. "Aw, I'm just teasing, Cloud!" she said, reaching over to elbow him. She was beaming from ear-to-ear. "I know you're not interested in a relationship."

"Yeah, I'm going to bed," Cloud said, heading for the stairs

"Awwww," Aerith said, watching him go. She frowned slightly after him, which looked more just like petty disappointment (which Sora was used to seeing from Kairi). "Man, I didn't even tease him that bad..."

Sora laughed a little. "Well... it made me laugh, if it makes you feel any better."

"Maybe a little," Aerith admitted. She turned to him. "You should probably head to bed, too, Sora," she told him with a smile.

Sora shrugged. "Do you want any help with the dishes?" he asked, glancing at the full sink.

She paused for a second, thinking about it. Then she shook her head. "No thank you, I don't mind doing them alone."

"Okay then," Sora muttered, slowly heading to the stairs. "Night, then!"

"Goodnight!" Aerith called, starting on the dishes.

Sora smiled and made his way to his room.