A/N: Hey guys, here is another chapter and I hope you enjoy it even if it is a bit shorter than the others. Sorry.

Important!
I have kinda bad news for you and hope nobody will throw things at me.
As my exams are coming closer once again – beginning at 27th June till 9th July – the updates will come irregular and probably rarely this month as I need to focus on my studies. This semester is even more important than the one before because it will decide on which university in Japan I will be going next year.
So wish me luck! ^-^

Therefore, I thank you for being patient with me.
The next two or three chapters for this story are ready, only need to be typed on my computer so after my exams there will be nothing stopping me from updating!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

~~ Fatal Scream ~~

~~ 9. March, Late Night ~~

A hushed voice echoed around him, coming from every direction. Ryoma didn't know where to look, where to search for this familiar voice. He knew it but couldn't tell whom the voice belonged. The sound of laughter, the sound of bratty comments, the sound of happiness, the sound of curses...

"C'mon, run faster!"

"You've gotten stronger, Ryoma, but you will never beat me."

Memories resurfaced, playing with his mind and repeating themselves right before his very eyes.
Memories which he had hoped to have sealed and banned into the deepest and darkest corner of his mind. It was his voice.

"Tsukiko wants to start playing tennis as well..."

"...You will take care of her, look after her and her smile..."

"...Like a brother to me, even if we're only cousins..."

"I just wanted to thank you..."

The voice filled the entire darkness around him, making his head dizzy. The loud echoes of the words hurting his ears and forced him to cover them with his hands. Ryoma groaned from the pain. Was it his mind, his body or his heart crying out in agony?

He wasn't sure and he didn't care. He had enough problems suppressing the overwhelming and arising sorrow and despair. The feeling of loneliness.

It was only a dream, could only be a dream because there wasn't any other way to explain the voice. The speaker was long lost, far away from the land of the living.
But it didn't stop Ryoma to glance from left to right, up and down, searching everywhere for the person. New voices entered the darkness and talked. All at once. Ryoma understood only snippets of what they were saying. Nonetheless, it was enough to know whom they were directed at.

"You lost the tennis match at the nationals and therefore lost your scholarship. How should we pay your tuition fees?"

"... an embarrassment of the family..."

"Your teacher told me that you have missed a whole week of lessons! Where have you been if not at school?"

"The neighbors are already talking about you, about us!"

"You brought shame upon us!"

It were the harsh words spoken by his aunt and uncle, scolding his male cousin. Back then Ryoma hadn't really understood all of them or the meaning behind them. However, nowadays he did and he could understand both sides; the side of his cousin's broken feelings as well as his aunt's and uncle's way of thinking as his mother and mostly his father too had raised him with a Japanese cultural background. Minus the education about Japanese manners and the reading and writing of some Kanjis.

"I'm sorry, Ryoma."

Ryoma choked, tears daring to fill his eyes and streaming down his cheeks.

"I can't... anymore..."

"You don't understand me! Nobody does!"

"I feel so alone and... useless..."

His cousin's face appeared in the middle of the darkness, awakening the last of Ryoma's nightmares. Ryoma's body trembled and all the oxygen fled from his lungs. He wanted to shut his eyes, to not see this face. It hurt too much!

He didn't want to see this face again. It hurt too much! It hurt too much! It hurt too much!

It was not the friendly face he knew and remembered, not the smiling one either, nor the laughing one. It was the pale face with blue lips, hollow eyes and clear dark strangulation wounds around the throat. It was the face of his cousin when they had found him – strangulated to death in the garden hidden behind large bushes.

Ryoma cowered, hid his eyes behind his hands, not able to view into this face. He rocked his body while sobbing, leaving the tears free range. He was too weak to stop them. His body and mind on its breaking point.

He had no clue for how long he sat there in this surreal but somehow real dream when a hand grabbed him strongly at his upper arm and tried to pull him up. Fearing to see the rest of his cousin's body once more, Ryoma screamed with all he had and struggled against the hold.

"Please... no...no..."

The cold hand duplicated itself and suddenly two pairs of cold hands grabbed and shook him rapidly. The cry of fear escaping his lips was shattering.

"No, no, NO!"

"Echizen, wake up!" The sudden bright light from above blinded him but he didn't dare to shut his eyes again, too scared to get in the claws of the nightmare once again. His vision was swimming and blurry, everything around him seemed dull and slow, almost colorless. His heart was beating rapidly; the drumming sounding numb in his ears and his lungs worked frantically to give him the needed air. The taste of blood also lingered on his numb and dry tongue and his body was covered in cold sweat. The nails of his fingers had bored itself into his flesh at his hands, leaving visible imprints.

It was just a dream. A nightmare. One of the worst he ever had but a dream nonetheless.

He took a shuddering breath and rubbed his eyes to wipe away the visible tear tracks. It had been a long time since he had dreamt about this. Ryoma thought he had buried this certain time of his past into the deepest corner of his mind. It seemed like he had been wrong. It hadn't been shoved deep enough into his mind to leave him alone. The past never left him, no matter how much he wished for it. His past came back hunting him whenever he had a stressful phase in his life... just like now...

The fear of getting caught, of revealing his secret and his past to his friends and team mates, his father's and mother's divorce, Tsukiko's sudden reappearance into his life. It all had been too much! She hadn't been so clingy when he had lived with his parents in America just opposite her and her parent's house. Tsukiko would visit him once or twice a month but never to the measure of sleeping in the same bed with him.

He should have known the nightmares would come but he would have never believed them to be so horrible in such a large extent.

"Echizen." Someone shook his shoulder gently, called his name and brought him thankfully out of this trance. As soon as his view was steady, he gazed into two pairs of eyes. It took him a moment to realize who was sitting beside his bed and staring at him. Tezuka and Sanada.

There was a hollow feeling in his stomach that told him something was wrong and Ryoma waited for the questions to start. His worry was unnecessary. Neither of the two spoke or moved in any way. They just stared at him in utter disbelief.

Ryoma blinked and took in his surroundings from the corner of his eyes. He didn't recognize the place. Where the heck was he?!

"Echizen." Sanada gazed from him to Tezuka and back to him. Tezuka only shook his head lightly as if to answer an unspoken question in denial. What was wrong and where was he? Obviously not in the blockhouse where he had slept before the match. Damn! Had Sanada really dragged him here to their actual blockhouse? Where the others near?

Instead of saying anything or asking questions or giving explanations, Sanada handed him a glass of water silently, nodded to him once and walked out of the bedroom and into the near living room, leaving Ryoma with Tezuka alone. Ryoma wasn't able to see through the open door to where Sanada went. All he could see was the entrance door straight ahead.

"Drink. Your throat will need it." Tezuka stood up as well after watching him taking a few shaky sips from the cool water. Strange enough, Tezuka was right. His throat was dry and itchy, actually aching when he swallowed.

Had he breathed through his mouth? It wouldn't wonder him. The nightmare had cost him a lot of energy and nerves. He still felt shaky and wobbly. Nevertheless… He had more than enough experiences with nightmares and never had his throat felt like this… only when…

Ryoma suppressed the need to grab his throat with his free hand.

Was it possible? Had he...
Had he lost control over himself so much that he had… in the middle of the nightmare?
It had happened once with fatal consequences, so it wouldn't be unusual but other than the one failure he had never lost control over…

It just couldn't be.

He swallowed a little bit more of the cooling water, staring at something without any real focus. His shaking hands made it a bit harder to not spill any of the water while drinking. The glass was empty far too soon and Tezuka grabbed it gently from his trembling grip. His captain's only words were: "Don't worry, the others aren't here and probably won't be any time soon. You had a nightmare and started to thrash around in the bed so we woke you up. Tomorrow's practice will be hard, you should rest some more."

Tezuka wished him good night and dimmed the light while joining Sanada in the living room, leaving Ryoma alone in the now darker bedroom. The two teens spoke quietly in hushed voices, making it impossible for him to understand what they were talking about. What had happened while he was asleep?

Something was different and strange about their behaviour. His mind tried to catch up but had trouble to shake off the feeling of horror, sorrow and angst. A headache and too dry orbs was the result of minutes long thinking in the darker bedroom. Tezuka hadn't shut the light off completely and Ryoma guessed it was for his sake, even if it seemed something to do for a child. Ryoma was secretly thankful for his captain's thoughtfulness.

Since when was his life such an unrepairable mess?
All he ever wanted since he was a child was to play tennis and live his life in quietness. Being alone wouldn't be new so he would welcome the solitude if it meant having no more worries. Worries about others feelings... Worries about Tsukiko…

Ryoma couldn't understand the world around him anymore. Everything was falling apart just like back then after his cousin's death.

Should he accept Sanada's advice?
No. No, he couldn't risk it… it would most likely hurt Tsukiko and she could get upset from it and… He didn't even want to end this train of thoughts.
The last time was, after living through this nightmare, still to raw in his mind. Never again, he had promised it and the promise included his voice… which led him back to the scratching in his throat.

It hadn't faded and slowly but surely his captain's words sunk in. They had woken him up when he had thrashed around in his bed…

...

How had they known he had a nightmare if they couldn't see him from where they were because right then Ryoma couldn't see nor hear them? So how did they if he hadn't used...

There was only one explanation and Ryoma felt his skin losing every color.

He had broken his promise and there was no other reasonable explanation as to how the two had known about him having a nightmare. He had unconsciously used his voice which he had kept hidden all those years… for Tsukiko's sake, for his aunt's and uncle's sake… for everybody else's sake but his own.

They had heard him scream.

The blackness surrounding him came to sudden to do anything against it so he Ryoma embraced it and let himself fall into the welcoming darkness of nothingness.