A/N: Hey guys, thanks for waiting and reading my story so far.
I will be absent the next two weeks, so the next chapter won't be updated until the end of the month. So... thanks for your patience and enjoy the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

~~ Panic Attack ~~

~~ 10. March, Afternoon ~~

They watched the third movie of a professional tennis match in quietness, just some comments were added here and there from Marui, Jackal and Kirihara. Seiichi found it fascinating to watch his newest person of interest. He watched him only from the corner of his eyes, so the others and especially his person of interest wouldn't notice his doing. Ryoma was sitting beside him on the sofa, knees pulled up against his chest with his chin resting on it and gazing at the television, nodding from time to time to agree to the spoken comments from the others. Seiichi wasn't certain if the teen was actually really listening and nodding due to some kind of reflex.

The atmosphere wasn't the best nor the worst but neither of the others showed it, their uncomfortableness. Marui and Jackal had simply nodded while their youngest kouhai had just stared at him in surprise with an open mouth. Seiichi was thankful for their silence. He had no nerve to explain all the details and feel his heart shatter once again. He wouldn't survive it without breaking and crying which was one of the last things he wanted.

Jackal stood up as soon as the reportage ended and shut off the television. "Yukimura-buchou, it is about time for the meeting."

The bluenette startled, his focus wandering back from Ryoma to Jackal. He blinked the confusion away and nodded to his friend. "You're right, let's head over there. I need to inform the coaches about the change of teams." Kirihara started immediately to chat on their way out, talking about the coolness of the change of teams and so on. The bluenette found himself unable to listen to the chatter, though he had never ignored his youngest kouhai's chatter before, always trying his best to look after him. Sometimes too much as Yanagi would say.

But not this time. His focus was glued at Ryoma who walked with them to the front of the house, put on his shoes like everybody else and headed outside, waiting there. Seiichi saw it as a good sign that the teen was waiting for them and not heading to the building alone. It was a symbol of liking or maybe it was simply due to the fact that he had no clue where to go for this meeting. The way he scanned the area induced Seiichi to believe it was the second opinion.

Although, the moment their eyes met… the blush spread widely across the younger teen's cheek and he avoided further eye contact instantly. It was really kind of cute. Ryoma truly had more than one facade to look at. Cool but shy, composed but scared or curious but disinterested. The only question left was which facade was the right one?

They walked all together to the main building where the meeting would be held. The closer they got, the less well did the bluenette feel. His stomach was already churning and they hadn't even entered the building. They would be there, probably acting all friendly, peacefully and in love. Unshed tears welled up and burnt in his eyes. No, he wouldn't give in to his emotions! He would be strong and fight till the battle was won and they bled.

They entered the large and richly furnished building and the hall where some other students were already waiting and the coaches were counting the students, seemingly satisfied to see all of them being there and on time. Seiichi stepped beside Ryoma, standing close by and glimpsing here and there, finding the cause of his pain too soon.

Genichirou, Keigo, Tezuka and Fuji had seemingly arrived together, standing side by side. Neither of them holding hands or having any contact with the other but it wasn't necessary. The way they looked at each other, smiled happily and the way they reacted to the spoken words…

It was sickening and filled the bluenette with anger and agony. Seiichi breathed deeply through his nose, gritted his teeth, viewed straight ahead of him at the coaches. There was no sign. Nothing to show their regret or guilt for their doing, their betrayal.

Not even Genichirou showed remorse. None of them cared whom they had harmed with their inconsiderate actions. Those bastards! Seiichi clenched his teeth tighter, tears of anger welled up but never fell. He wouldn't let them. His chin hurt from the pressure on his teeth but he welcomed this pain if it meant forgetting the one storming inside him. To his horror did he note the feeling of being watched too late - watched by Ryoma.

Wise enough, Ryoma avoided his orbs quickly after being caught, not commenting the tight expression on the bluenette's face. The coaches began the meeting and asked for the student's attention. Seiichi didn't bother listening. He needed to focus!

All four of them would regret betraying him!

Seiichi took a couple of very deep breaths, then took two steps to his right, resting his hand suspiciously around Ryoma's shoulders, smiling at him gently when the teen startled and looked up at him with wide and innocent eyes and a blush covering his cheeks. A shiver shook Ryoma's body and Seiichi wasn't sure what kind of shiver it was. It wasn't important anyway. What mattered was the result. The straight standing hairs at his neck confirmed him that the first step of his plan worked.

And it got just better because Ryoma didn't move away and out of range. The teen stood still with stiff shoulders, his attention directed back at the coaches. At least it gave the impression of it. The shivers kept coming, the suspicious glances from out of the corner of the eyes as well.

"-therefore we have decided to transfer the training inside the sport halls. Each team has a different plan of practice. As the hall is now ready to be in use once again but has only two tennis courts available, the teams have been placed in order. The schedule about the use of courts will be put at the front door for everyone to see. Each team is going to use the fitness room above, strengthening their stamina and power in the time where it doesn't use the courts. Any questions?" Coach Ryuzaki asked, searching for lifted hands and questionable faces. No one replied though. "Very well, you can return to your rooms as the rain probably won't stop any time soon in the next days and it's too late to practice now. Dismissed."

The chatter and talking erupted in an instant and the horde of teens standing in the middle of the large hall dissolved quickly, echoes of their chatter remaining a little longer. To Seiichi's liking was one group in particular staying behind and heading his way, not in the least amused. The bluenette offered them the cold shoulder, turning away and walking to the exit with a smug expression on his face which nobody saw, covered by his long hair.

"Seiichi, please wait!" Genichirou approached him first, his expression softening slightly but not from guilt or regret. No, the softening of expression was due to the inner pain his friend felt, his own hurt. A sting stabbed Seiichi's heart continuously. Seiichi had never liked to see Genichirou hurt or weak because it meant pain and his best friend, nor any of his friends, should ever feel pain. He had done so much to try to protect his friends, especially Genichirou, from any possible hurt but he had failed.

Genichirou had been heartbroken back then and Seiichi had helped the best he could but nothing had made it better or less painful. Now his best friend had forgiven those who had caused this whole shitty mess in the past and to top it of in the present time, only with him being the victim. The feeling of betrayal, the pain his friend had caused him just hurt too much. He couldn't forget or forgive it right then. He wanted his revenge first.

Ryoma jolted up, seemingly obvious about the approaching group. The teen's head swirled around and he stumbled back right into Seiichi's chest, his whole body turning even more rigid. Seiichi ignored it, focusing solely at the group standing now in front of them. "What do you want, Genichirou?"

"We want to talk." Keigo stood at the front with Genichirou, blocking his way.

"Sorry, but no."

"Ore-sama want to explain why Ore-sama did what Ore-sama did!"

"Well, Keigo, but I don't want to listen and Ryoma seemingly doesn't want to listen as well as you can see." The teen was completely still, each muscle forced to stillness and his try to appear calm instead of scared failed. The bluenette remembered this expression from the time when he had first asked him in the morning to join him and leave the others behind. What was scaring him so much now? What had the four done to him?

"Maybe your contact is making him look like he doesn't want to listen because he seems a little bit uncomfortable with you touching him so directly."

"Says you, Fuji, who couldn't get his hands off of him. We all saw earlier how he jumped at my offer to join me, ne?" Fuji glared at him in open anger. Seiichi smirked in satisfaction. "At least Ryoma isn't betraying anyone as he makes it pretty clear that he doesn't want to be near you." Ryoma began to slightly shake under his hand.

Seiichi did only notice then Tezuka's and Genichirou's gazes being on Ryoma and not on him. Both looked almost gently at the teen with some sort of… worry. Tezuka had the nerve to actually shake his head. The reason behind it was unexplainable fro Seiichi. Fuji on the other hand took turns glaring between him and Ryoma. Keigo alone was watching him directly.

"Ore-sama knows you are hurt. Ore-sama had planned to tell you about it, after the camp."

The green and blue monsters called jealousy and pain stormed and raced inside Seiichi. It was a great feeling, seeing them taken aback and… a little bit hurt by his words. Nevertheless, the satisfaction wasn't strong enough to cover the amount of ache in his chest by the bare sight of his ex boyfriend and best friend.

"Maybe you should hope now that someday I forgive you, Keigo. Excuse us, we need to talk with the coaches now." Seiichi went past them with Ryoma beside him, leading them further inside the building and passing a corridor filled with bottom to roof windows. From there he could see most of the camp.

"Seiichi!"

No, he wouldn't give in!
No, no, no, no no!

The first act of his plan - making them angry and letting them see him with their person of interest - went well. Now he needed to arrange act two of his plan - to sway Ryoma's opinion and persuade him to change teams entirely, not only at the camp but school as well. They nearly reached the room for the coaches when the bluenette stumbled and avoided a hard landing on the ground thanks to the near wall.

Ryoma had stopped in the middle of the walk and just stood there. He trembled violently, all color disappeared from his skin, his chest heaving and sinking violently and in an irregular rhythm. "Ryoma?"

No reaction.

"Echizen?" Tezuka and Genichirou went - no, Seiichi would count it as running - so, they run over, the worry now written clearly in their faces.

"Ryoma?"

"Shit!"

Had Tezuka just cursed?

"Keigo, would you please…" Fuji blocked Ryoma's view and whatever the teen had seen through the large window and glared at Seiichi while he was at it.

"Ah?" Keigo looked over Fuji's shoulders, frowning by the sight. The bluenette did the same, noting a girl walking under an umbrella with a suitcase around the camp. Her back was turned to them. Keigo nodded, disappeared with hurried steps.

Seiichi didn't really understand what was going on. The next moments were rushing past him. Tezuka and Genichirou took hold of Ryoma, guided him further along the corridor while Fuji studied the scene outside where Keigo talked to the girl.

"Echizen!" The yell pulled Seiichi's attention back to Genichirou and Tezuka who held an unconscious Ryoma in their hands.

What the hell was going on?

Ryoma felt the nightmares creeping closer, their claws reaching for him, their faces identical with his cousins. Both of them.

"Why have you spoken?"

"You promised to watch over her!"

"You broke your promise, you left me like he did!"

"Ryoma, how could you!"

"Since when are you so close to others?"

"Why?!"

Tsukiko shrieked, lunged for him with one of her undefined claws. It wasn't her voice, her face or her hand. Nothing which could identify this nightmare as her but it was. It was his cousin. His male cousin as well. The words were hard to understand, spoken at the same time in scratchy and earsplitting voices. But Ryoma couldn't cover his eyes or ears. He couldn't move at all. He was helpless, like back then...

"Never again!"

"You don't understand."

"She has done it once... I don't want to lose her as well, please..."

"I can't!"

Their faces misshaped: their skin turning grey or disappearing altogether, their eyes growing hollow just like their cheeks, bones showing and hair shedding.

Both looked... dead.

Ryoma's heart raced, hammered violently against his chest and sweat poured out of every pore. The claws reached for him, grabbed him and threw him into a black well filled with ropes, razors and other traps. Ryoma couldn't stop the fall, couldn't do anything. His hand searched frantically for something to hold onto but there was nothing around, only darkness, just blackness. He didn't feel any walls, nothing!

He was scared.

The ground grew less and less distanced, closing at an impossible speed.

Laugher. Children's laugh.

The approaching ground changed from the traps into a garden with his cousins waiting for him. The dead looking cousins.

Ryoma swirled with his hands around, still trying to get out of this nightmare when something took hold of his left arm. He yelped in fear by the sudden touch. Gentle but manly hands held him in the middle of nowhere, giving him a chance to survive, to not fall. He clung at those hands for his life.

"You promised, Ryoma!" Ryoma's head jerked to the source of voice, raspy and old. His uncle's voice. "You promised to help, to protect her!"

All air escaped out of his lungs, left him gasping for it like a drowning person. Ryoma struggled, pushed and pulled and shoved, kicked around. He let go on his own, not wanting to see his uncle's misshaped face more precisely. He was falling anew into darkness where screams and yells erupted from.

"Wait, Ryoma!" His uncle's hands turned into dark red slime, streamed down some unseen round walls and filled the ground like water, rising steadily. The slime dropped down from a suddenly appearing roof, growing thicker and thicker.

"Ryoma!" A piercing shriek burst Ryoma's ears. Above him was Tsukiko, still a young girl, screaming and crying after finding her brother hanging at a tree. The shriek grew on volume, turning from uncomfortable to painful to ear shattering.

Ryoma shook his head in denial. No, he didn't want to see it again. It wasn't real! He looked everywhere to avoid the memory but it was useless. There was no escape. The dead face of his male cousin appeared everywhere, asking for help, asking for favors, screaming in pain, still and dead.

Ryoma cried, let the tears fall from his closed eyes and covered his ears with his hands, hoping the soon to be coming landing wasn't too violent and painful. He was helpless and therefore did the only thing he could. He screamed for help.