Music suggestions: "Nemesis" and "Invincible" both by Two Steps from Hell

Chapter 150: Nine

Axel chucked one of his chakrams at Riku, which Riku didn't avoid. He nearly gasped in pain, but managed to stifle it.

"C'mere, I'll make it all stop," Axel taunted, warping so that he was farther away from Riku. Amaryllis ran forward and slashed his scythe at Axel, but Axel just warped again so he wouldn't get hit.

He's pretty quick, isn't he?

That's alright.

He summoned more darkness to him, and threw it at Axel. Axel blocked it with his chakrams, yet again.

But it's alright.

I'm doing fine.

Axel attacked with two swipes of his chakrams. Riku jumped out of the way. He charged his blade with darkness, flung it at Axel, then leapt up to grab it before smashing into the ground, sending out a wave of darkness. The attack hit Axel full on.

This is almost… easy…

Riku just grinned to himself. It was hard not to feel satisfied.

Except now Axel was preparing an equally deadly-looking attack. Riku dodged to evade the four—four—flaming chakrams that Axel had sent at him.

Amaryllis swung at Axel's head, but Axel ducked before he could be decapitated.

"You're not even trying!" he called.

Not trying? Hmph.

Riku dashed forward, swinging his blade twice at Axel before jumping backward and out of reach. Axel threw a flaming chakram at him, and then turned and threw one at Amaryllis, too. Neither met their mark, but that didn't seem to bother Axel much. He just caught the chakrams, grinning.

You're the one who's not trying!

You're the one who—

He stopped, the truth of that—no. No he wouldn't think about it. If he thought about it he'd just get flustered again and that wouldn't do. He was strong enough. Strong enough to take Axel. No need to get nervous.

Why are you grinning like that? It's really getting on my nerves.

It's like you—

He leapt into the air and swung his blade down at Axel. Axel sidestepped so he wouldn't get hit, and Riku slammed into the ground next to him, sending out a wave of darkness upon impact. That hit Axel, but it didn't seem to do much.

"What's the matter, Riku?" Axel laughed. "You seem to be—"

"Shut up!"

I don't want to hear it.

I am doing fine. I don't need you telling me otherwise.

He slashed at Axel again, and this attack hit.

There. I'm doing just fine.

Riku let out a half-relieved sigh. He wasn't doing terribly. He wasn't—

Why is Axel grinning like that?

It's like—

Riku's eyes went wide with terror.

He doesn't even think I'm a threat!

Riku couldn't think up another reason. There couldn't have been another reason why Axel seemed to be enjoying this so much, why he didn't even seem to be trying. It's because he wasn't trying.

And to make it worse he's been able to avoid or block most of my attacks. I'm hardly doing any damage. We've been fighting and I've gotten nowhere.

Axel's not even tired and—

No!

How is he so strong!?

Riku took a few steps away from the battle, lowering his blade, resisting the urge to clutch his head. This couldn't be right.

This shouldn't be happening!

I should've gotten past him by now. Killed him. Defeated him. At least beaten him! Anything! Anything…

It's not- it's not right-

I-

I'm—

NO!

Not weak!

I am not weak.

I am perfectly strong and Axel's just having a good day and I'm having a bad one and I am so weak…

He didn't know what to do. He felt like crying, honestly, but he couldn't do that because crying was worse. Crying was weakness. He couldn't be weak even though he obviously was. He couldn't take Axel. Xemnas hadn't put up any effort and had defeated him. Even Xigbar hadn't seemed too terribly worried about fighting him.

I bet I couldn't even take Demyx.

I…

He took a few breaths, trying to calm himself down. So what he was having trouble fighting Axel? He didn't need to waste energy fighting Axel anyway. If there was… another way to get past Axel, then he could fight Xemnas—even though I'm not strong enough—just like he wanted.

"I don't know why you're trying to keep us out of there!" he shouted. "We already know what you're doing! You're bringing Roxas back."

It was the only weapon he had left. They knew what Axel was doing. And… somehow they could use this knowledge against him. Right? He never quite understood how this worked. Maybe he'd messed this up.

Wouldn't be surprised. Can't seem to do anything right—no! No, I need to stop thinking like that. Just because I'm weak doesn't mean I'm a complete failure…

…it sure feels like that, though.

"You know, if you stop us, you're going to kill Roxas, right?" Axel asked.

Riku froze.

No, he didn't know that. Well, he should've, it made perfect sense, but the thought had never occurred to him. He swore. Tears were welling up in his eyes.

Not only am I weak, but I'm a monster, too. I didn't even think about what would happen to Roxas if I stopped Xemnas. I just wanted to charge in here and—

Ugh, I need to stop thinking like this!

Why am I so upset, anyway?

Why can't I keep a hold of my emotions?

I hate feeling like this!

He was having a really hard time holding back his tears. He didn't make eye contact with either Axel or Amaryllis, hoping they wouldn't notice if he did somehow manage to start crying. He stared at the floor, taking deep breaths to hold himself together—at least for the moment. He only needed to last until he was alone; or at least away from Axel.

He slowly turned to Amaryllis.

"We need a new plan," he said. His voice was tired—exhausted, really.

I just want to be somewhere else right now…

"Alright," Amaryllis said.

"So we're done fighting?" Axel asked.

"Yeah," Riku said. And he turned and walked away.

xxx

Axel let out a small sigh of relief as he watched Riku and Amaryllis walk away. Then he grinned.

Now, that wasn't too hard, was it?

And, now that it's taken care of…

He banished the wall of fire that was blocking the doors to the Computer Room—though, maybe it'd be best if he left it up. He could pass through it just fine without getting burned, and it wasn't like there was anyone else that needed to get through to the Computer Room at the moment—and poked his head in.

"How's Roxas doing?" he asked.

26 groaned.

xxx

"Didn't go well, did it?" Alpha asked, when Riku and Amaryllis returned to the computer room. There was quite a bit of smugness in his voice.

"No," Amaryllis said. "Axel put up more of a fight than I think we expected. Or, at least more than Riku expected." He cast a hesitant glance over at Riku.

Riku ignored it.

"Riku…" Vexen said, slowly. "Are you-"

"I'm fine!" he snapped.

I don't need you saying anything, that's for certain.

"Are you hurt?" Vexen asked.

"I'm fine."

Didn't you hear me the first time?

"Maybe you should—"

"I said I'm fine!"

Vexen closed his mouth. Riku groaned and rubbed his head.

"He's just upset Axel was too much for him," Alpha said.

That's not—

Riku nearly launched himself at Alpha, his self-control slipping, but Amaryllis caught him by the shoulder and held him back. Riku glanced up at him, questioningly, but Amaryllis's eyes were fixed on Alpha.

"Alpha, that wasn't necessary," he said, sternly.

Alpha just shrugged, unfazed. "I told you that that plan wouldn't work. It's not my fault you didn't listen to me."

"There's no need for you to be so smug, though," Vexen said, folding his arms across his chest.

Alpha turned to him, a bit surprised. "I thought you were on my side."

"I don't deny the fact that what Riku did was dangerous," Vexen said. "But I don't see why we have to rub it in his face that this wasn't his best idea ever."

Thanks. I think.

Why are we discussing this, again?

"What's it matter, anyway?" Riku asked.

"I was right and you were wrong, that's all," Alpha said. He smirked slightly. "You aren't as strong as you think you are."

"I was just—" Riku began, trying to defend himself.

He's right, though.

You really aren't as strong as you think you are.

How long did it take Xemnas to beat you, again?

Riku turned away.

No! Stop thinking like that!

It's bad enough I nearly broke down in front of Axel. I can't afford to do it here, either. I…

He really just wanted to be anywhere but here right now. He slowly sunk to the ground, holding his head in his hands. He wasn't going to cry. Why'd he want to cry, anyway? He was just fine! So what? Axel'd just been more difficult than they expected, and, yeah, Xemnas didn't have any trouble catching him off guard, and, sure, maybe he was weak. But there was no sense crying about it. All he needed to do was move on.

The only problem was he couldn't seem to stop thinking about it.

And Alpha rubbing it in his face wasn't helping matters.

And—

"Riku, are you all right?" Vexen asked.

And, yes, he wished that would stop, too. Vexen was so unbearable at times.

"My head hurts," he lied. "The room's… spinning a bit. Just gonna sit down."

I don't need them knowing what's really going through my head.

Though I guess I could've just said I was tired. Exhausted from fighting Axel—no. No I couldn't have said that. Then they'd think I'm weak, too, and I'd only be proving Alpha's point.

"What's wrong with him!?" Vexen demanded.

"He hit his head pretty hard while we were fighting," Amaryllis said, calmly. "I'm sure that's all this is."

Well, nice to know that Amaryllis cares enough to defend me…

Extremely nice, actually.

"Wouldn't this have happened sooner, though?" Alpha sounded a bit suspicious.

"You know him. He was probably just ignoring it as we were fighting Axel."

"Do you think he'll be okay? Should we call 7?"

"There's nothing 7 can do for him, Vexen, and you know that. He's not compatible with our Program. And even if he was, we sort of don't have one."

"And whose fault is that, hmm, Alpha?"

"Again, how was I supposed to know that he knew where it was?"

"And, again, you could've at least kept it somewhere safer!"

There they go, arguing again. Oh well, at least they're done bugging me. I suppose I'm grateful for that.

I don't get Vexen, though. Why is he—

Riku paused, looking to his right. Amaryllis had sat down next to him. He frowned.

"Hit your head pretty hard, huh?" Amaryllis asked. From the tone of his voice, it sounded like he knew that was a lie.

Riku sighed. "I don't like being thrown across rooms," he muttered.

Amaryllis laughed, quietly. "I don't think anyone does," he said. He nudged Riku a bit playfully. "C'mon, don't be too hard on yourself. You'll have another shot at him."

That's not what I'm worried about…

I'm worried I won't be able to take him, next time I do have the chance to fight him.