QUESTION 8
Dear JOKER,
What the HECK have you done to Ms. Grace? She was a poor, innocent soul, and you had no right to kill her, much less take away our valued advice giver! You should be ashamed of yourself! ASHAMED! Also, is "pinky's out" still required at a tea party? I'm going to one tomorrow and I am going LOONY TUNES over whether or not I need to practice my pinky etiquette!
Regards,
Pink Lady
P.s. ASHAMED!
- - - REPLY - - -
Ashamed, you say? Moi?
nO...no No...nonoNOnO...nuh uh
no, Pink ladY. sHame is a wAste of N-er-G.
Lay-D. heH ha hA
Peeeenk la-deeee
pinK LaDy…. like tHe razOr? i liKe razorzZzz. Mmmmm hmMMmm…. you CAn cut so maNy thinGS with raZors. likE hopes aND dreaMS and fAceS
Slice slice sliiiiiiiiiiiiiice…..
You, ah... haha, you aDdressED ME in CAPITaL leTTers. did YoU do thaT to scORe some poinTs… Or weRe you yeLLing at me in pRint?
i wonDer how LOUd you can yeLL. how loud Can you sCREam?
...Can I coMe over to FiNd out, rAzor Girl?
anD JusT so you kNOw, I didn'T kiLL Ms. gRAce.
...GraVity dId.
leT me go On the reCorD: there's a reAson ?why? you neVEr saw mS. gRAcE's photo (saY cheeSe! gorGonzOLa) prinTed in her aDVice coLumns - shE had a faCe like Elmer FuDD. Ha hahA ha fugly heh heh He's Loony tOOns… how's DAT for coINcidenCe?
See, i'm trYing to bRing class to the cRiminal eleMEnts of this ciTy, sO i went To seE her for adviCE. (When yOu cut oFF a man's bAlls, where DO you sticK 'em? In his BusTer bRowns or in his moUTh? whaT to do?) i apPRoached Mizzzz GraCE at the top of tHe stairs, Just ouTside of her seCond story condo oN WestcheSter AvenUe. She was leaVinG to go to a fundraiser hosted by Bruce waYne. (haVe you sEEn the cars that spoiled puNk drives? What's HE coMpen(i)sating foR, mmmMmMm?)
Ms. Grace was dreSSed all in sILVer for the ocCasioN she lOOked like a sLinKy so I jusT wanted to sEE if she coULd take the sTaiRS like one.
Mmmm… noPe.
her bOnes made cRunCHy noises on the wAY down. Like CaPtain cRunch with CruncHBeRRies! Her heaD wasn't reaLLy facing in the riGHt direCtion when she HIT the bottom. Ha ha oops spLat ha
I was kiNDa disapPoiNted, because she DiDN't get a chance to diSpense her aDVice to me. I kicKed her heaD so that it was fAcing foRWard again, but she didn't waKe up. She lOOked like an Elmer Fudd Pez disPenser. So i cut hER throat dEep, and puLLed her head bAck to see if eiTHeR adviCe or a big Piece of chERRy Pez would pOp out. I got bupKis. But it waSn't a toTal loSs – I staBbed one of heR neighbors haHa so i felt mUch beTTeR.
PinkIEs out when drinking teA, alwaYs. 'specially iF you'Re going to a funDraiser hosTed by bRUce WaynE. when hE looKs your way, WAG that pinKy finGer at him. He'll know eggs-act-Lee what yoU're insinuating...
...and the foLLowing dAY he'll droP $150K
at the MaseRAti dealeRship on CoNcord aVeNue
So he cAn
...drive... aROunD
hIs
sHIny
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PenIS.
HA
-JoKER
-4oC, 2009.07.10