Ch. 13 - Oh Merlin

A/N: This was two half-chapters that seemed to mesh together. Who knew that mistletoe shrubs were technically poisonous? I bet JK Rowling did. I bet she also knew about all of the properties of asphodel and monkshood too.

A/N2: Ch.14 is in the middle of being written as we speak. I had a rabid plotbunny bite me on the big toe this weekend and I've been writing it since. It's going to be 2-3 parts and I hope to have the first part up in a week or so. - DG

Hermione had her hands full. Then again that wasn't surprising on a Sunday morning with her family still in the bed.

The clock on the wall said half five. She had time do the laundry and enjoy a quiet couple of hours reading while her family slept on. They needed it more than she did right now.

Hugo had been awake late last night complaining of a tummy ache. Hermione wasn't surprised. He had day with his grandparents and cousins and his Gramma Molly indulged him. Meals and sweets along with playing too much out in the sun made for a cranky child come eight pm. He whined and complained until Ron stepped in and finished that incident. A few stern words behind closed doors were enough to get Hugo to settle down for a little while – at least until he ran in to Hermione completely soiled. Hermione reacted quickly, taking Hugo to the loo to get a bath and feeling better. Rosie and Ron retired shortly thereafter while Hermione stayed up with him, cleaning him up two more times before he finally settled into a somewhat restful slumber.

Hermione crawled into bed a little after midnight. She didn't worry about waking Ron since he was snoring like a freight train in the middle of their king sized bed. His snores had lulled her to sleep for over a decade now. The nights when he was out on a raid or working a long case were the hard nights. Those nights, their bed was too large and the room too quiet for just her.

She was short on sleep yet wide awake at 5:15. It seemed that the only time she slept in was when she was miserably sick with something – and that hadn't happened in years. Once she worked through and learned to cope with the trauma from the war she quit sleeping so much or in bed. Now she moved like she had a purpose.

Today's purpose was washing the soiled sheets from Hugo's room. Well, breakfast too later on once it was closer to 8am. And then running by the office to drop off the paperwork she finished last night before Hugo got sick. And then once that was finished she would return to Shell Cottage to spend the afternoon with Fleur and the kids.

The laundry was quickly loaded and she had hours to herself. The tea kettle was ready for use and the coffee she poured for herself was welcome, even in the heat. She took a sip and enjoyed the flavors – bitter and smooth. There was just enough milk in it to make it palatable.

She caught a hint of aftershave a second before long arms wrapped around her torso. "Hey," a half-asleep groan sounded in her ear. Hermione turned and immediately turned to her sleep-tousled husband. He had his shirt off and his boxers hung low on his hips. She licked her lips in appreciation.

"Why are you up so bloody early woman? Come back to bed for a while."

Hermione snuggled into her husband's embrace. He was so warm from coming out of bed. "Hugo was sick last night and so I'm washing the linens."

"Are you washing like Mum does, by hand with magic? Do you need to watch it happen?"

Hermione blushed. "Well, no, but I'm normally up and working this time of the morning."

Ron looked down on his barmy wife. "So put it aside and come back to bed for a spell. It'll still be here later and ready for the dryer."

"But Ron, I – "

"Nonsense woman. When was the last time we had time to ourselves?"

He had a point. She squinted at him standing in front of her looking rather fit and chauvinistically adorable. "Why are you up this early? You normally sleep in on Sundays."

"That was the plan. I've not had quality time with you in days."

Hermione snuggled back into his arms, playing with the sparse ginger hairs on his chest. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you missed me."

"I do miss you when we work so much," he said quietly before laying a gentle kiss on her lips. His large hands travelled down her camisole covered back and onto the swell of her bum. "I got up early so I could spend some time with you. Are you trying to dash my well laid plans this morning?"

Hermione pulled Ron's stubble covered face down to hers, giving him an intense look that required no words. "Fine then. But you're cooking breakfast."

"Sorted." Conversation ended with a passionate snog. They quietly left the laundry to wash on automatic. Neither of them heard the beeping once the cycle was finished.

Hermione woke with a start to the smell of cinnamon and apples. She had fallen back asleep and hadn't felt him leave their bed to make breakfast. She glanced at the clock on her bedside table and saw it was after 8 in the morning. She smiled thinking of how nice this Sunday was – including falling back asleep this morning. She might not make a habit of sleeping in but a nice change in the routine was welcome.

A few minutes later she went into the kitchen and found her husband working the oven. He had the breakfast table laid out along with pitchers of juice and fruit. On the back burner was a pot with Irish oats cooking for her porridge. On the front burners were skillets with rashers and fried eggs cooking.

"Hey," he said quietly while tending the eggs in the pan.

"Hey yourself. Thanks for cooking this morning. I didn't realize I was tired." Hermione slid into her seat at the table and picked up her cuppa. She took her tea unlike her husband – with milk and no sugar. Within seconds she had a bowl of porridge in front of her, a measure of milk and a bowl of berries next to her porridge.

"I don't know how you're not hungry in an hour eating that. I'd be nothing but a stick if I ate like you do."

Hermione watched Ron plate the rashers and fried eggs on his plate before turning back to the stove. The kids loved his Eggy toasts and cheese toasties and oat cakes. "You think Hugo should have a regular breakfast?"

Hermione looked up from her porridge with milk. "We'll see how he does with juice and toast first before anything else."

"You know he hates toast."

"It's not like he'll eat any of the fruit or my porridge either."

"Why don't I make him some eggs and rashers? It couldn't be any worse than a hangover."

"Ronald! Our son wasn't drunk yesterday!" Hermione growled from her seat. "A stomach bug is nothing of the sort."

"You have to admit it's great for the next morning though," he grumbled from the skillets. "Being sick the night before, I can say that he's going to eat his weight in eggs this morning if I cook up enough."

"Fair point. It might not be a bad idea. Go on and plate him two fried eggs then. If he doesn't eat it, you can."

Ron grinned before turning back to the skillets waiting the next order.

A chair scrape told him that Rose was sitting down at the table. By the time Ron turned around to plate Hugo's eggs Rosie was tucking into his breakfast of fried eggs and rashers. "Hey, that's my breakfast. There's yours!"

Rosie looked up with those large blue eyes. "But I'm hungry!" she whined.

"Fine. Tuck in. I'll make more for me."

Ron turned back to the stove. He had to finish Hugo's breakfast before he could cook another one for him. Fried eggs, cheese toasties and an egg toasty was Hugo's preference right now. A month later it might be porridge or something else. If he didn't feel like eating everything cooking now would have someone clamoring for it.

Ron finished up Hugo's breakfast and put it down at his seat. Next up was his second breakfast since he didn't get to eat the first one. A pan of rashers followed by some fried eggs and more toast.

"Hey, gimme that! It's mine."

Ron looked over his shoulder and had to stop from laughing. Hugo had snuck into the breakfast room and was eating the remaining rashers on Rose's plate. "All's fair dear – you nicked it from me."

"But it's mine!"

"You can have some of what I'm cooking now if you're so hungry."

"Dad," she complained further.

"That's enough. We have more than enough so you two don't have to bicker over breakfast. At least you're getting to eat. You only have one brother who nicks your food. I had five older ones and they weren't as kind about taking off your plate. So settle down and eat."

Hermione looked appalled. "They stole off your plate? That's horrible!"

Ron plated the rest of Hugo's breakfast and handed it over to him. "That's why I had to eat so fast. Fred and George were notorious for taking stuff – or giving me what they didn't want. I always got stuck with the corned beef. Ginny was just as bad. She's take all my bacon if I didn't inhale it first."

"So that's why she was always taking the bacon I wouldn't eat our last year – she didn't want it getting left behind."

"Bacon's too good to waste, Hermione. You should try it sometime."

"Suit yourself. I still prefer a fresh bagel or scone and jam."

Ron shook his head in silent laughter. "You have it backwards. That's just a snack."

"Well finish up so you can eat too. Everyone else has tucked in or finished."

Minutes later, Ron came to the table with his plate piled high with fried eggs, toast, and rashers. "Now this is a proper breakfast Hermione. This'll put meat on your bones."

"Ugh. I think I've got indigestion just looking at the plateful there."

"Zut yozelf," Ron mumbled through a forkful of breakfast.

Hermione watched Ron tuck into his enormous breakfast. He always ate well before a raid. Then again their pleasant morning probably helped his appetite. She knew that his hunger was something he'd probably never get over. She understood that all too well.

"You still have to go out today, to Cornwall?" Hermione asked cryptically.

"Yeah. I have to be in at the office around 10. I should be back about 3. You?"

"We're running by Shell cottage then I have to go into the office for about two hours. The kids get to play for a while and I get to finish the filing for the case next month. Once I'm done there I'll be able to have lunch with them while the kids play."

Ron inhaled the rest of his breakfast before he picked up the remaining empty plates to the sink and set them to cleaning.

Hermione looked up from the morning edition of the Daily Prophet. "You go and get ready. I'll wash dishes."

"Sure?"

Hermione grinned. "You did cook breakfast. I'll finish the dishes. Only fair, right?"

"Sorted," he grinned over his shoulder.

Hermione unlocked the door to their residence listening to the prattle of the kids in tow. She had overstayed her trip to the office by two hours and missed lunch but got there in time for afternoon tea. It had been a day at the office and the kids were whining because they didn't want to come home and bathe after playing with their cousins Dominique and Louis.

She laid down her satchel and purse and spied Ron's robes and BDU jacket on the back of the couch. I'm glad he's home. I missed him terribly today.

Ron was gone before Hermione was out of the shower, leaving her to get the kids ready for the playday with Fleur and the kids. She knew there was a raid today on a residence in Cornwall but didn't know the details. It was a compromise with her husband that he tell her when he was going on a raid even if he couldn't divulge the details before reporting to her since she was in MLE.

"You have an hour to wash up and do your reading before dinner. Daddy's home but probably taking a nap so play quietly when you're done."

"But Mummy, we want to play with Daddy too," Hugo whined.

"Daddy had hard work today after breakfast so he's probably too tired to play right now. Maybe after dinner he can go out back and watch you ride your brooms."

"I missed Daddy this morning."

Rose is so like her father. "I did too sweetheart."

The kids went to wash their hands while Hermione went to the kitchen to start dinner. The kids were getting fish fingers while she would make Ron a chicken pasta dish he liked the last time they went to Antonio's in Soho. She had leftover roasted chicken in the cooling cabinet from yesterday which she would turn into dinner.

Once the pot of water was started and the ingredients verified, she went to their bedroom to see if he was taking a nap or anything else. The door was closed and she didn't hear anything from inside the room so she opened the door and heard the shower running.

Maybe later, she thought while slipping out of her dress jacket and her modest heels. She quietly opened the door to the en-suite and saw his outline through the curtain to the shower. A smile crept onto her face.

She opened the curtain and was met with a shock. Ron's body was covered in red splotches from his fingertips to the end of his nose along with along the back of his neck and a small strip above his ankles.

"Ron!" she yelped. "What happened?"

Ron turned and saw his wife in shock. "Fell into something on the raid and this cropped up after I got home."

Ron turned the taps off on the shower before stepping out in dripping glory.

"Oh honey, can you tell me what happened?"

"We went on the raid this morning. It was to a potion ingredients farm over in Cornwall. He tends plants for Muggles and Wizards it seems. Well, it started off well enough since we were trying to find out his buyers and then trace who was doctoring the potions to backfire – but then the distributor showed up and all hell broke loose. He took off running through the plant farms and it got gross from there."

Ron worked the towel around his torso while pointedly ignoring his wife's darkening eyes and increased respiration rate. "Anyway, the ruddy bugger threw a tripping jinx over his shoulder and I fell into this pile of plants and he kept going. He did it again and again. I think I fell like five times before we caught up with him and got him arrested.

"We apparated to the Ministry for the holding cells and then the itching started. It got bad enough that I went to St. Mungo's to get checked out. I think I spent more time there today than I did on the raid itself."

"And what did they say?" Hermione asked quietly in the steamy loo.

"They had to call in Neville and a specialist to figure out what all I fell in. They treated the worst ones – the belladonna, the nightshade, the asphodel – but they also had to treat the other Muggle ones like the monkshood, the hemlock, and coakum – but it seems that I am also allergic to mistletoe and stinkweed."

"But that doesn't explain all of this?" Hermione waved her hand over the bulk of his body.

"This is the reaction from falling into the mistletoe shrubs and running through stinkweed plants. They treated the various toxins and counteracted them but they couldn't treat these fast enough to counter the reaction. This is the results – these itchy splotches."

Hermione stepped closer to look at them. She saw how angry they were on parts of his body, like the back of his neck or the ends of his fingers. Others, like the one on his face looked better than anything else. "Why does your face look swollen but almost normal?"

"Neville. He handed me a tube of something for my face. He said the other stuff that they had on hand for me would hurt too much there so this would be easier around my eyes and nose."

Hermione found the tube on the counter of the wash basin and smiled. She knew this product too well from her own childhood. A fall into some poison ivy at her grandparent's residence as a child was treated with this product.

"Here, let me help them. What else do they have for you not for your face?"

Ron motioned to the larger tub next to the smaller tube. "Is that Neville's own product?"

"It's the same one. He probably doesn't need to work since this hit the markets a couple of years ago. But we know that he loves what he does now. I don't think he'd trade much to have anything different."

"Mummy!"

Hermione stood up on her tiptoes to plant a short yet hot kiss on his lips. "I'll be back to put the lotions on."

"Brilliant," he replied quietly while running an irritated finger down her face. She slipped out the loo.

Ron looked in the humid mirror and saw what she did. "Bloody hell!"

Ron stepped out of the bathroom a short time later to wonderful smells from the kitchen. The babble of the kids chatter greeted him before even walking into the breakfast room. But the sight of his love standing in her stocking feet with an apron on made him smile. "What's for dinner, Hermione?"

"We're having pasta with the leftover chicken while the kids are getting fish fingers and chips and green beans."

"Sounds good. I'm starving."

"Daddy, what happened?"

"I fell into a mistletoe shrub. It turns out I'm allergic."

"What's allergic?" Hugo asked through a bite of chip.

"It means it makes Daddy sick. He fell into many things today while out working."

Rosie started giggling. She had her own handful of chips in her hand.

"Oh you think that's funny huh?"

"Did you trip over your big feet Daddy?" she giggled further. She popped a chip in her mouth.

"No. A mean man threw tripping jinxes at me. I ruined a poor guy's garden when I fell."

Ron took a bite of his chicken pesto pasta and groaned in delight.

"You have big feet Daddy."

Ron saw his daughter flashing him her snaggle-toothed smile. He instead took another bite of dinner.

"Well if Daddy had small feet like I do," Hermione stuck her own size seven shoe foot out for the kids to giggle with "then daddy would fall over all the time and hurt himself. So he needs big feet since Daddy is a big man."

"Did he hurt you?" Hugo asked through his fish finger.

Ron turned to his son. His eyes were huge looking up at him, bright brown ones like Hermione. "Nah. I'm ok. Falling into stinkweed hurt more than anything he did to me."

"That wasn't very nice of that other man."

"It wasn't but he was scared. People do stupid stuff when they get scared."

"Were you scared Daddy, chasing that guy?"

Ron saw Hermione looking at him asking the same question. He rarely talked about his routine raids – only the bad ones that tore him up were really worth talking about in the quiet nighttime hours. "Nah. We only wanted to talk with him but he got scared and ran. When we caught him and took him back to the ministry he was in more trouble than had he stayed and we talked."

Ron put his fork down to gather his thoughts. Hermione smiled through her own bite of green beans.

"It's like Gramma Molly and Grandaddy taught you – covering up for something will get you into worse trouble than telling the truth. They might get mad and you might get into some trouble with me and mummy but it's better than hiding from it or lying about it. That will get you into even more trouble."

"You mean like Fred getting into trouble for nicking cookies and blamed Jamie for it?"

Ron smiled, remembering how his brother would do the same to him. "Exactly. How much trouble did Fred get into for that one?"

The kids looked at one another. "He had to go home to Aunt Angelina when Gramma found out. He missed out on swimming and dessert."

"Exactly. Few things are worth missing dessert for. Right Hermione?'

She smirked. "You would think that way."

"Of course. Like bacon is too good to waste or Jammie Dodgers should never go stale."

"I want biscuits."

"Once you finish your chips you can have some."

Ron laughed watching Hugo shove the rest of his chip in his mouth. "'ike did 'um?"

Hermione could only shake her head at the scene. Say what you will but she loved these moments of domesticity.