AN/ reminder that if you're interested in reading ch62-65 of Can't Escape you'll want to now, because it explains where Riku's been.
Chapter 185: The Cure
Riku wasn't entirely sure why he ran to her room instead of using a dark corridor, but maybe it was to give him a little extra time to think. Not even to think. To focus his thoughts.
Parallel universe? Other Namine? Vexen?
None of that mattered.
None of it matters, Riku told himself.
What did matter was Namine was hurting. Having another meltdown. He knew. It was pounding in his head, burning in his brain. They were connected, and he could feel it.
Of course, Namine was probably fine, what with forcing nine meltdowns and all. But… that didn't change anything. He was here now. He could be with her. Hold her through this one—because they still hurt her and, really, nothing had changed.
Except a lot had changed…
Regardless.
He found her where he'd left her when Vexen had dragged him off. Still sitting on her bed, knees up, sketchbook in her lap. Of course, she was clutching at her head, now, biting her lip to hold back screams.
Riku didn't even hesitate. He sat down on the bed next to her, wrapped his arms around her, holding her close and holding her tight. He gently pulled her hands away from her head, squeezing them.
"Nice to have you here…" Namine said. Her voice was quiet and a little strained, but she got the words out just fine. "If there was… anything I missed… while you were gone," she continued. "It was this. You holding me… like this…"
He held her closer, pressing his face into her hair.
"Asking if you're okay would be dumb, huh?" he mumbled.
"I'm alright," she insisted. "It's not exactl—mm!" She went rigid, but a scream never left her mouth.
He took a deep breath. He could feel—see?—a couple of memories flickering at the back of his mind, but he couldn't make much out of them. It was only a blur. A muffled blur. If he'd thought about it, he would've noticed that the link between their minds wasn't as strong now. It'd led him to her, but then it'd gone silent.
She relaxed, then, snuggling up against him. He shifted a little, so he was sitting more comfortably.
"Where'd this one come from, anyway?" he asked.
Namine laughed a little. "Where do any of them come from?" she whispered.
He was silent for a moment.
"You didn't… force this one… did you?" he asked, quietly, haltingly. It wasn't a pleasant question. Or a pleasant thought. But… it was, unfortunately, a possibility.
"Of course not!"
"Had to ask…"
Riku sighed. She was handling this well. Very well. Not that was a bad thing! He just… felt a little useless. She was holding up just fine without his help. She seemed coherent. She didn't appear to be in a lot of pain, either.
He swallowed.
"I'm not… actually… helping, am I?"
"I have no idea," she told him, gently. "I- mg!" She took a few labored breaths, trying to fight back whatever pain she was feeling. "I- I want to say you… are… but…" She sighed, and snuggled closer to him. "It doesn't matter. Whether you help or not. I want you here."
"Mm…"
It was a nice feeling. Being wanted. She didn't care if she didn't need him here. She wanted him here. And that was nice. Really nice.
"I guess we just sit here and wait this out?" he whispered.
"Nothing else we can do…"
There was a faint laughter in her voice. He couldn't help but smile.
To be honest, if you asked him later, he'd never be able to tell you the exact details of what happened next. He couldn't peg the exact moment he made the decision, let alone why he made it, but—of course—he remembered doing it.
Her head was already resting on his shoulder. All he had to do was shift slightly… and then their foreheads were touching. Their breaths were mixing. And he'd intended just stay there. Enjoy the closeness. The meltdown didn't seem so bad this time, and if they could sit here like this while they waited it out, it couldn't be too bad, right?
Except, he shifted, he supposed—or maybe she did. Whatever happened, the next thing he knew, they were kissing. He almost pulled away at first, but then—
"Riku! Look!" she gasped, pointing.
He knew this memory. But… why was he seeing it now? And… of all memories…
"Shooting star!" he laughed, grinning, running father out onto the beach.
…why this one?
He paused, though, once he realized Namine wasn't with him. He turned around to look at her, and saw she was trembling.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"What- what if a shooting star hits the islands?" she said, voice cracking with her fear.
He broke into a grin. "Don't worry!" he told her, pulling his wooden sword from his belt and brandishing it. It made him look cooler. Braver. (Or so he thought.) "If a shooting star even thinks of coming this way, I'll protect you! Promise!"
She giggled, and then ran to him, looking much happier now. "Okay!" she said, and took his hands, forcing something into them.
He looked down at it—the star shaped charm.
"What's this?"
"It's my good luck charm."
Riku pulled away then.
That was- that was nice, but- but that memory…
It wasn't even real. And even if it was, it wasn't her. It wasn't… It…
"Riku…" Namine said, slowly. She sounded a little surprised. Breathless, even.
He flushed. Ah. Yeah. He was a little breathless, too.
"I'm- I'm sorry," he stuttered. "That was- that was dumb, wasn't it?"
To his surprise, she burst out laughing.
"What?" he asked, confused. He couldn't help but laugh a little himself. Laughter—her laughter—was awfully contagious. "That- I- I get it was dumb, especially since you were—"
"No, Riku. Riku-" She just laughed some more, and then moved and took his face in her hands, pulling him closer to her, touching their foreheads together. There was a ripple of something in his mind, and it felt like- like her. Like her mind touching his. That whole… telepathy thing they had.
"Riku," she said, voice soft and giddy with excitement. "Can you feel it?"
"Feel what?" he asked.
What was he even supposed to be feeling?
"Exactly!" she laughed, and let go of him. "It's gone. It stopped." And she just kept laughing, grinning wider than he'd ever seen her grin before.
"What- what stopped?"
He felt a little bad for being so stupid and missing whatever it was she was trying to tell him. Show him.
"The meltdown!"
His eyes went wide, and he stared at her.
"No!"
"Yes!"
She nodded enthusiastically, continuing to laugh. She clasped her hands together in front of her face, still grinning.
"You're kidding!" he said, laughing, too. It seemed so absurd… but…
"No!" she said. "I'm not! I swear, I- It stopped the moment you—" She broke off, giggling. Her cheeks were red and she wouldn't look him straight-on, now. "Ohmygosh!" she gasped. She couldn't seem to stop giggling, either. "Of all things—"
"So you mean that-" he said, trying to wrap his mind around this. "That me- that-" He couldn't say it. Or anything. All the words he wanted to use couldn't get past his tongue. "How…?" he managed, finally.
"I- I don't know!" She shook her head, still grinning. Still giggling. "It was just- just like any other meltdown. And then you- and then it was like… like I was overflowing with happy memories, and—" She giggled again.
He giggled a little, too. He couldn't help it. Her laughter was so contagious. And of all things to possibly stop the meltdowns, he hadn't exactly expected this. It was… absurd. But…
But…
His smile slowly feel.
That's right.
"That memory—" he began. "It's not…"
"I know," she interrupted, gently. "But what's it matter?" She just giggled. "It was cute. You were cute."
"I was five," he argued, feeling a little defensive. "And it's not even a real memory…"
"It doesn't matter," she told him again. Then her brow creased with worry. "Does it?"
"Well—"
"It bugs you."
"I- I…"
"Riku, spill it!" Her voice was firm. "Tell me what's wrong."
"I just-" he sighed. "It's not… not real… and it's- not you. It's her. And—" He let out a long breath, then closed his eyes, resting his head in her hair. "You know what?" he mumbled. "It doesn't matter."
"It doesn't?" she asked.
He just buried his face in her hair, running his fingers through it. "No."
And it didn't.
Sure, maybe he did still love the other Namine. But it didn't matter. Because he loved this Namine—his Namine—so much more. She was kind to him and wanted him. Wanted to spend time with him, to just be with him. She wanted him so much that she forced nine meltdowns to sabotage the experiment. Nine! And as much as he was frustrated with her for it, it was nice—really nice—to feel wanted.
Plus, she was wonderful. She painted him a sky. Was always there for him. Her smile was like sunshine and he loved the way she giggled. Her hair was soft and her touch was warm and he just… wanted to spend forever… right… here.
She giggled again, and shifted so her cheek was pressed against his fingers and her face was right next to his. She let out a breath, and it tickled his lips and his nose. He sighed.
"Riku…?" she mumbled.
"Mm?"
"I…" She trailed off.
He started to ask her what she wanted to say, but then she was kissing him. Softly. Slowly. And—
"Why a sky?"
Another memory?
"Hmm? Oh!"
But this one wasn't his…
She put the paintbrush down, sighed a little. Wistfully. "Because I think Riku really misses it sometimes. Cooped up in here like he is. He misses the sky… the open air… the freedom of nothing holding you in—holding you back." She sighed again, smiling. "He really misses that."
There was a flicker, and then it was a different memory.
"Whoa…"
He was staring up at the ceiling, eyes wide, jaw slack. He scanned the ceiling, again and again, moving so he could see all of it, eyes growing wider and wider as he took it all in.
It was a little weird to see himself from Namine's eyes, but he didn't have much time to think about it. Or care too much about it.
"You like it?" she asked, tentatively.
She'd hoped he would, but now that she was showing him…
"Like it?" he turned to her, grinning. "Namine, I- wow. It looks… wow."
She broke into a grin, too.
"That's good!"
It was great. She'd hoped he'd like it, that he'd love it, but it was even better to see his reaction than to just anticipate it. He was awestruck. Grinning like an idiot.
"It looks beautiful," he told her.
"You really think so?"
He nodded.
"Why did you…?"
"I wanted to do something special for you. To cheer you up."
"You didn't have to."
"I never said I had to." She laughed. "I said I wanted to. There's a difference."
Another flicker. Another memory.
She was sitting—kneeling—next to his bed, holding his hand tightly. He was asleep. Relatively.
"Shh," she told him. "I'm right here. That's where I'll always be. I'll- I'll never leave you, Riku. I promise."
She was crying for some reason. Warm tears rolling down her face.
"I swear, I will be with you forever," she whispered. "I'll be there to hold you when you cry. I'll be there when you can't be strong. I'll be there when you need me. I'll always be there. Always, Riku."
She'd told him about this…
"I- I said I'd never leave you. That I'd- stay with you… no matter what."
She was looking down at her toes, mumbling, either embarrassed or upset—or both. They were—
He didn't want to think about that.
"I- I don't… remember that," he told her.
"I know." And now she looked up at him, eyes fierce. "That's why I'm saying it again. I promise I'll never leave you. That I'll always be by your side. No matter what happens."
It was oddly familiar.
Flicker.
They were on the beach. All was quiet—all but the sound of the waves.
"I promised you I'd keep you safe," he told her, voice shaking a little.
"Riku, I… don't remember."
"I know." He grabbed her hand, gently. "That's why I'll say it again. I will protect you. I promise."
But that wasn't—
"Whatever's hurting you, I'll make it go away…"
He…
"Riku!"
He looked down at her. She nudged him in the arm, playfully.
"What?" he laughed.
"Nuttin," she said, laughing, too. "You were just spacing out, that's all."
"Aw." He wrapped his arms around her, and she squealed a little, surprised. "It's nothing."
She smiled. This was where she wanted to be. In his arms.
Flicker.
"I just… I want to spend forever with you. I don't- I don't ever want to leave you."
"Namine…"
"I know. I can't really never leave you. But If I could… I'd… Spend my every second with you. Spend forever in your arms…"
Another flicker. Sharper this time.
"Namine!" Joseph said, sternly.
"I know," she was practically shouting "I know!"
The memory broke off there, like it was being pushed aside. Shoved aside. Desperately.
But he didn't miss the thought that came after that one.
"I can't let them take him away from me…"
Namine pulled away. Her cheeks were red, and she was breathing heavily. Not that she wasn't smiling a little. She was smiling a lot, actually. Riku just grinned back at her, pulling her a little closer, touching their foreheads together again.
He licked his lips, a little nervously.
"I… uhm…" he said, slowly.
She just giggled.
The door flew open with a slam! as it hit the wall. They both jumped, a little shocked, and out of habit pulled apart from each other. Well. Tried to. Riku had a wall behind him and couldn't go far, and Namine didn't move too much—she moved so she wasn't close to him, but she was still fairly… close.
Joseph was standing in the doorway, staring at them. His eyes were narrowed in concentration, clearly deep in thought.
"You were… in the middle of something," he said, slowly. He looked suspicious.
"Yeah," Riku said. He was torn between feeling a little bitter for having been interrupted and… still being breathless.
Joseph stared a moment longer, and then slowly started to grin, chuckling a little evilly.
"Oh," he said. "So you two were… in the middle of something."
"I- no," Riku stammered, not liking what the tone of Joseph's voice and the look on his face were implying. "We were-"
"Why are you here?" Namine asked, coming to his rescue.
"I- oh!" Joseph's evil expression dropped and was quickly replaced by panic. "That's right. Axel's here."
"That's not… a good thing, is it?" Namine said, slowly.
"Nope."
Riku sighed.
"I'm coming."