Chapter 8: Merchant's Seed

Thankfully, nobody sees me in my... slutty state when I arrive back at the Hawthorne Homestead. I retreat immediately to my room, cleanse myself in the shower, before falling into bed for what is sure to be a fitful night sleep.

Later that night, I am awoken, by voices from downstairs. Male. I recognize my brother-in-law's amongst them, slurring and swearing; his miner buddies must have helped him back from the festival. I snigger. There will be hell to pay once Prim sees his hangover in the morning!

My impulsive coupling must have done quite a number on my mood, for over the next several days, I find myself... happy. Almost giddy. I hum to myself as I hunt and skin the meats of my kills for our family dinners. I play readily with Rory, Winnie and Ben when asked; I even sing them The Meadow Song as a lullaby one night.

However, though I may emotionally be in an almost unheard of healthy state, physically it is the total opposite. Barely a week passes after the Summer Festival before I find myself throwing up regularly into the toilet; the sickness even keeps me inside for a whole day so that I accomplish no hunting. Maybe it's a bug? Or did I not cook the meats carefully enough and contracted some kind of food poisoning? If the latter is so, I sure hope none of the others got it. Yet they all appear perfectly fine, even the children.

One morning - the probably ninth or tenth in a row that I've had to throw up - Hazelle comes to sit next to me on the bathroom tiles. She rubs my hair soothingly, until I finally am able to meet her gaze. When I do, she gives me a sad smile.

"You have to tell him." She doesn't have to say anything further for me to know whom it is she's talking about, nor to communicate to me that she knows what must have gone on. Still, I shake my head, refusing to believe it even as my brain wills me to admit it.

"I can't be... it's not possible..."

"Katniss, child, I went through this four times myself. Watched Prim experience it thrice more. You were there, too! Surely..."

My eyes sting with tears as I furiously shake my head. "I can't. What would he say? What would any of your family say? Do you really want the girls and Ben to think their Auntie Katniss is a whore? What will they think of me?"

"They will think nothing of you! Nothing horrible. And neither will Gale; Prim and I will make sure of that! But you have to fix this first."

Ever since Mother died, Hazelle has been like a mom to me. It only strengthened when my sister got her as a mother-in-law. Slowly, I nod. Hazelle gives me a hug before leaving me to my thoughts. But there is no longer anything to think about.

I know what I have to do. I have to face him. I have to face my ex-husband.

It is a few hours after dusk when I arrive at the bakery. I tentatively knock. Moments later, Peeta opens the door with a confused and worried expression on his face. He ushers me inside, closing the door behind him.

"Katniss? What are you doing here?"

"To see you. I have to tell you something," I spill out quickly, before I lose my nerve.

Peeta sighs, running a hand over his face. "If you're about to tell me you love me, or that... you're apologizing for what happened that night of the Festival..."

"I'm pregnant," I burst out.

Peeta stares at me for a long moment, stunned. He's blinking rather rapidly. I scan his eyes searchingly. "Say something!"

Peeta rests his hands against the counter, exhaling long and low. Finally, he raises his eyes to me. "Well, I guess there's just one thing to do. We have to marry. And I want to marry you, Katniss! I want to marry you!... if you'll have me."

I shake my head. "No. You don't."

He blinks. "Katniss, you may not realize this, but I have regretted letting you go every day since the accident! I have no idea what possessed me to throw away the only woman I've ever loved in some vain hope I would heal easier. I have never stopped loving you, and if given the chance, I would marry you again in a heartbeat! Why would I lie?"

I turn my face away, unable to bear looking at him. "Merchant boys don't mean the things they say when..." I am about to finish with 'when they're drunk', but I correct myself to spare him. "... when they're having sex."

When I train my gaze back on him, Peeta is staring at me strangely. "I told you I wanted to marry you the first time we slept together," he whispers intensely. "And then we did. I wasn't lying to you then. And I'm not lying now."

I gulp, my heart rate suddenly speeding up. I take a sudden interest in the wooden flooring. When I glance up at the sound of movement, I see Peeta bearing down on me. I jump back, startled. "What are you doing?"

"Will you just stand still?" he barks exasperatedly. I barely have time to recall that oldest of jokes between us before he is swooping me into his arms and kissing me right on the lips.

I surprise even myself when I return it without any resistance whatsoever; I practically swoon in his embrace as his arms go about me. I drape my arms across his shoulders as if they will keep me from tumbling end over end into this sweet abyss I find yawning wide before me. And all I want to do is just jump...

The kiss gets heated very quickly. I feel Peeta pick me up as though I weigh nothing at all, let him bend me back over the counter before he scrambles nimbly on top of it, on top of me. Yanking at each other's clothes, we strip naked quickly so we can proceed to make sweet, slow, sensual, passionate love... My only whole, coherent thought is how lovely it is to be taken right over a countertop. My back grinds against smooth, glassy marble with every roll of Peeta's pelvis into me. We kiss slowly, tenderly, our lips disappearing into each other like a rock sinking through water. Our sweaty limbs plaster together just right. The feel of clasping each other's skin... it's as if our bodies were made to fit perfectly together. I lose myself in this man who is in my arms, as the rest of the world falls away...

The moon is high in the sky, bathing Peeta's and my post-coitus forms as we snuggle together, still on that countertop. It's very late; my Hawthorne relatives will be wondering where I am.

Which reminds me...

"Yes," I whisper gently to Peeta, pecking his lips chastely with mine. "I will marry you. But... I have to introduce you to my family first."

He raises himself up on one elbow, giving me an amused smile. "You mean your sister's family?"

"Yes, and her mother-in-law. Her husband, Gale. And they have three beautiful babies - my nieces and nephew." I smile shyly, blushing. "They'll want to meet their Uncle Peeta..."

"Yeah, but I bet your brother-in-law doesn't want to meet 'Uncle Peeta'!" my lover cracks. "I heard what he was saying about me that night at the festival..."

"It doesn't matter what Gale thinks. And if he's idiotic enough to make a fucking peep about it, my sister and his mom will put him in his place!"

"I'm not sure whether that makes me feel better or more terrified," Peeta muses. He's seen Primrose mad. Couple her with Hazelle's temper, and God help us all! "What do you suggest?"

"Come with me to dinner in the next few nights. Let me introduce you to Rory and Winnie and Ben."

Peeta smiles wistfully. "They sound like great kids." He kisses my nose, then pecks my lips. "All right. I'll come. I'll need to see if our baby is going to have nice cousins to play with. An aunt and uncle to dote on him."

"Him?" I smirk, amused. "What makes you think it's a boy?"

"Intuition and gene history," Peeta quips. "There hasn't been a Mellark daughter born in at least five generations!"

"I'm a dangerous girl," I grin slyly and flirtatiously. "You know I've never been one to conform to the rules."

"No, indeed," Peeta grins. "I wouldn't be surprised if the rules against breaking the Mellark patriarchy are right next to the ones that forbid hunting outside the district."

We laugh, before falling asleep in each other's arms.