Chapter Seven:
Mid February wasn't supposed to be a tragic time. It was supposed to be cold, and annoying, but not tragic. Everything Jace knew about life was tragic, and he was hoping that he had experienced enough to never experience it again, but that wasn't the case. Two days ago, Izzy and Max got into a car accident coming home from his after school program, and they were hit by a drunk driver. They did everything they could, but Max didn't make it. It was the worst news Jace had ever gotten. He was only 9, and he didn't deserve this. He deserved to live a long life, and to never have to experience pain because he was so incredibly innocent and full of nothing but pure happiness.
The Lightwood family had locked themselves in their house for the few days after the incident. Izzy was discharged from the hospital and went straight to her room and locked the door, and Maryse and Robert sat in the living room like statues. Alec went back to school to try and cope to the best of his abilities, and Jace, well Jace just sat at the piano and played mindlessly. It was the only thing that really kept him sane. To say school was an after thought would be like saying the sky was blue. The school knew about the accident and gave the Lightwoods as much time as they needed to grieve the loss.
Clary on the other hand didn't know why Jace wasn't in school. Clary expected Jace to show up in the art room after school one Wednesday and he wasn't there. Clary knew that Izzy and Simon always talked for a little after school and she decided to ask Izzy where he had been for the past couple days. Jace and Clary had an interesting relationship, one that she had never had with anyone before. He became her shoulder to cry on when it came to her brother, or just her buddy to sit in silence with when she was painting and didn't want to talk. She treasured their friendship, and clearly something was wrong, and it killed her to know that something wasn't right.
When school finally ended she walked outside to see Simon getting in his car and it confused her. She ran up and banged on his window and he rolled it down.
"Where is the fire Fray?" Simon asked as he laughed.
"Don't you normally talk to Izzy after school for a little bit?" Clary asked and she saw Simon's face fall a little.
"She hasn't been in school the past couple days." He said.
"Her either?" Clary asked.
"What do you mean?" Simon asked.
"Jace hasn't been here either. I hardly think that's a coincidence." Clary said and Simon nodded. "Do you think it would be too intrusive if we went over there to see what was up?"
"I don't know, do you even know where they live?" Simon asked and Clary laughed.
"No, but it's the Lightwoods, they are really wealthy, so I assume they would live in the wealthier part of town. We can drive around and if we don't find it we'll just wait until they come back."
"Alright Nancy Drew, where should we meet?" Simon asked and Clary laughed.
"Meet me at my house. I need to grab something before we head out." Clary said and Simon nodded. They were back at her apartment rather soon and Clary ran straight to her room and grabbed her sketchbook and headed out to meet Simon. They started making their journey into the rich part of town. And when they say rich, man do they really mean it. Clary had never seen so many big houses in her life. They were driving by when they got to the end of the road and were greeted with the most spectacular house they had ever seen. Clary looked up and her eyes got wide.
"Wow." Was all she said.
"This place is insane. Who do you think lives here?" Simon asked and Clary started looking around when she spotted it.
"I think we found the house." Clary said and Simon looked at her.
"What do you mean?" He asked.
"That rock over there says Lightwood." Clary said and Simon laughed.
"You're taking information from a rock?" Simon asked and Clary glared at him.
"There is only one way to see if we're right." Clary said as she got out of the car. She made her way up the driveway when she spotted Jace's car. "Ha! I was right. That's Jace's car." She said and Simon followed behind her. When they got to the door Clary got nervous. She had just stalked Jace, and she didn't realize how crazy the idea was until now. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door. After a few moments she thought it was a lost cause when the door opened and there stood a woman who looked exactly like Izzy.
"What do you want?" She said in a harsh tone, but Clary could tell she was upset so she dismissed the attitude.
"I'm Clary, and this is Simon, we go to school with Jace and Izzy. They haven't been in school the past couple days and we just wanted to make sure they were okay." Clary said with a smiled and Mrs. Lightwood sniffled.
"They won't be in school for a little while." The woman said and Clary looked confused.
"Is everything okay?" Clary asked and that just seemed to set the woman off more.
"No. Everything is not okay." She yelled and Simon and I took a step back. A moment later there was a man standing behind her and leading the woman inside. He turned back to us and gave us a sad smiled.
"We're dealing with a family loss at the moment." Mr. Lightwood explained.
"We're so sorry. We had no idea." Simon said and he nodded. After a moment of silence he spoke up again.
"You know, maybe if Jace and Isabelle saw you two, it would really help them cope." He said and motioned for us to enter. Clary looked around at the house and was completely amazed. Than she heard the music and was even more amazed and mesmerized. "Jace is in the music room. Just follow the sound, and Isabelle is in her room. Good luck getting in there. She's been locked in for a few days now." Mr. Lightwood said and walked away. Simon and Clary looked at each other and smiled.
"Good luck." Clary told Simon and he laughed. He disappeared up the stairs and Clary followed the music. Jace wasn't lying when he told her he was good. He was playing beautifully, and it was completely captivating. When she got to the doorway she stopped and watched him play. His fingers glided effortlessly over the keys and he was playing with more passion than Clary had ever seen. He had stopped and lowered his head to the keys and Clary saw his body moving in the motion that told her he was crying. Clary walked over and sat on the bench and started rubbing circles on his back. He clearly wasn't expecting the physical contact because his head shot up.
"Clary? What are you doing here?" He asked and Clary smiled.
"You haven't been in school. I was worried." Clary said and Jace whipped the tears off his cheeks. "What happened?"
"Max." Jace said and Clary's heart broke. She had met Max once or twice. He was a lively little boy, and so incredibly happy. "He died a couple days ago."
"Jace." Clary said and she grabbed his hand. Their fingers interlocked and Jace sniffled. "How?"
"Drunk driver. Him and Izzy were in the car."
"How is Izzy?" Clary asked.
"She's completely broken. She blames herself for his death. She wishes she was dead, not him." Jace said and Clary didn't know what else to do so she climbed up on Jace's lap and pulled him into a hug. Jace's arms immediately went around her waist and hugged her back. They sat there for who knows how long just consoling one another. When they finally broke apart their eyes locked and Jace's eyes flickered down to Clary's lips. Clary knew that Jace was upset, but there was a part of her that really didn't care because she wanted him to kiss her. A moment later Jace leaned in and pressed his lips to her and she returned the kiss immediately. The kiss was something Clary and Jace both have never experienced. It was electrifying, and filled with passion, and the unspoken connection that they both knew they had. When they broke apart their eyes locked again and Jace smiled a real smiled for the first time in days.
"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." Jace said and Clary smiled.
"What took you so long?" Clary asked.
"I didn't want to ruin our friendship. You were the first real friend that I've ever had outside of the Lightwoods, and I felt like if I kissed you, and you didn't feel the same way it would ruin everything." Jace admitted and Clary pressed her lips to his again and she felt him smile in the middle of it.
"How are you holding up?" Clary asked and Jace sighed. "When was the last time you slept?"
"I haven't left this room." He admitted and Clary got off him and pulled him to his feet. She dragged him to the couch that was in the room and laid him down. She put his head on her lap and started playing with his hair. He smiled and closed his eyes. "It's been really tense around here. Maryse and Robert are in shock still and Izzy hasn't left her room."
"That's what Mr. Lightwood told Simon." Clary said and Jace opened his eyes.
"Simon's here?" Jace asked and Clary nodded. "Good. Maybe he can get through to her." Jace said and he sat up.
"What are you doing?" Clary asked.
"If you want me to sleep, you're going to lay with me." Jace said and Clary smiled and nodded. Jace grabbed a pillow and laid down and Clary laid on top of him. Jace took a deep calming breath and closed his eyes. For the first time in days he felt like he could actually breath and forget for a moment that Max was gone. He fell asleep inhaling the strawberry scent of Clary and let his mind finally rest.
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Simon walked up the stairs and saw a door that had an "I" on it, and knew it was Izzy's. He tried to twist the knob but it was locked so he knocked.
"Go away!" He heard Izzy yell. He knocked again. "I don't want to eat food mom! Leave me alone!" He took a deep breath and knocked again. He didn't hear another this time but the door flew open. "Mom…."She started yelling but stopped. "Simon, what are you doing here?"
"You haven't been in school, I was worried about you." He said and she sighed. "Are you okay? Your parents said you haven't left your room." He said and she broke down. Simon immediately pulled her into a hug and closed the door behind him. Izzy cried into his chest and Simon let her go. He could tell this was the most movement she had done in a couple days and he picked her up and put her on her bed. He got in next to her and she curled up next to him and continued to cry.
Izzy and Simon didn't know how long they were sitting there, but Izzy was grateful to have him next to her. She didn't want to be around anyone, but when she saw Simon she just wanted him next to her. When Izzy finally stopped crying she sat up and rubbed her eyes and looked at Simon.
"Sorry I look like a mess." Izzy said and Simon smiled at her and whipped her tears away.
"You look beautiful." He said and Izzy smiled. "This is a good look on you." He said and Izzy looked down. She was wearing sweats and a large sweatshirt.
"I haven't changed in days." She admitted and Simon laughed.
"Sometimes you just need a couple days like that." Simon said and Izzy nodded.
"I was in a car accident a couple days ago." Izzy said and Simon got worried. He put his hands on each side of her face and rubbed his thumbs over her cheeks.
"Are you okay?" Simon asked and Izzy started crying again.
"I'm fine but Max." She said and she was crying even harder. He pulled her into him and let her cry. Simon thought back to what Mr. Lightwood said, they were dealing with a family loss, and it clicked in Simon's mind. Max. Max was the loss. He pulled Izzy even closer and went to lay down. He pulled the blanket over them and started rubbing soothing circles on her side.
Izzy didn't realize she had fallen asleep. She hadn't been sleeping well, and when she does fall asleep its because she cried herself asleep and that normally didn't last very long. She woke up and realized that she was incredibly warm and when she opened her eyes she saw Simon laying down with her, also asleep. She propped herself up which caused Simon to wake up as well. He rubbed his eyes and put his glasses back on and smiled at her.
"How are you feeling?" Simon asked.
"Better. I haven't slept that well in a long time. How long were we asleep for?" Izzy asked.
"Three hours I think. It's almost 6." Simon said and Izzy nodded. "Do you want to try and eat? I think it would be good for you." Simon said and Izzy sighed. She knew she needed to eat, but she didn't want too.
"I guess I could try." Izzy said and Simon smiled. Simon got up and extended his hand to Izzy and she took it. They walked downstairs together and into the kitchen where the rest of her family, plus Clary was. When they walked in everyone was shocked. Maryse walked over to them and took a deep breath before hugging Izzy. Izzy hugged her back knowing that she has been extremely selfish these past couple days. They were all grieving and her completely ignoring her family wasn't the smartest move. "I'm sorry mom." Izzy whispered.
"This wasn't your fault Isabelle. That drunk driver hit you." Maryse said and Izzy started crying.
"I should have been able to protect him." Izzy said and Maryse just hugged her tighter.
"We almost lost you too Isabelle. When we got to the hospital and they said they didn't have any news on you I thought I was going to die. And when the doctor told us that you were extremely lucky to be able to walk out of that hospital the next day I was over the moon happy."
"But Max." Izzy started but Maryse cut her off.
"They did everything they could to save him Isabelle. This is that drivers fault. Not yours." Maryse said and Izzy nodded. "I made chicken noodle soup, would you like some?"
"Yea." Izzy said and they made their way over to Jace and Clary. Izzy noticed that they were holding hands and made a mental note to ask Jace about that later but right now she just needed to eat.
Clary and Simon stayed for a couple more hours before they needed to get going. Clary and Jace walked fully out to Simon's car where as Izzy and Simon stopped on the porch. Izzy glanced down at Clary and Jace and saw him give her a kiss goodbye and couldn't help but feel so happy for those two. She looked back at Simon and smiled.
"Thank you Simon. I don't know how long it would have taken me to get out of bed if you didn't show up." Izzy said and Simon pulled her into a hug and kissed her temple.
"Of course Izzy." He said and them pulled apart. "Just remember, I'm here if you need to talk." He said and she nodded. "I'll see you whenever you come back to school."
"Actually, in two days, we're having a little funeral for Max. It was just going to be family, but I would really like if you came." Izzy said and Simon smiled and nodded.
"Of course I'll be there." Simon said and he headed to his car. A moment later Jace made his way back over to Izzy and joined her on the porch. They watched Simon drive away and Jace put his arm around Izzy.
"I invited him to the funeral for Max." Izzy finally said and Jace took a deep breath.
"I invited Clary too." Jace said and Izzy looked up and smiled at him.
"So, you finally pluck up the courage to ask her out?" Izzy said and Jace scoffed.
"Actually I just kissed her and she was hooked." Jace said and Izzy elbowed him.
"Don't be an asshole Jace." Izzy said. Jace laughed and pulled her into his side.
"I really missed you Iz." He said and Izzy gave him a hug as her reply. It was going to be hard for the Lightwood's to fully grieve for the loss of Max, but Izzy knew that as long as she didn't completely shut them out again she could get through it.
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Alec had gone back to school after he spent all of one day at home. He couldn't stand being there without Max, it hurt too much. He got back to his dorm but he didn't want to be there either. He decided that he needed to forget. He grabbed his stuff and went back to that bar and decided that he was going to drown his sorrows in alcohol. He ordered three shots to begin with and that after a couple hours he forgot everything that had happened and he thought he would feel better, but nope, the numbness just added to how awful he truly felt.
Magnus was at home with Chairmen Meow and working on a project that was due at the end of the week. He had a glass of wine to his right, he had music playing softly in the background, it was the perfect evening in Magnus's opinion. He was humming along to the song that was on when his phone started ringing. He walked over and saw that Alec was calling. A part of him perked up immediately, but another part told him not to get his hopes up. He wanted to speak to Alec so badly, and I guess this was his best shot.
"Hello?" Magnus answered.
"I'm an asshole." Alec said and Magnus could clearly tell that he was drunk. "I'm the worlds biggest asshole, and I'm related to Jace. That's saying something." Alec continued and Magnus rolled his eyes.
"I thought you called because you had some news to tell me Alec." Magnus said. He didn't want to be a drunken thought when it came to Alec, although he was flattered that his obvious clouded mind thought to call him.
"You thought I finally came out to my family?" Alec asked and Magnus heard him laugh. "Please, there are more important things than telling my parents I'm gay." Alec laughed and that made Magnus angry.
"What could be more important than telling your parents who you are? What could possible be more important than finally admitting to them that you are gay and have feelings for a man, who by the way, has hated having to keep his distance from you." Magnus yelled. He was furious. These last couple months have been brutal for Magnus and it sounded like Alec didn't care. He could hear Alec open his mouth to say something but heard another voice in the background.
"Get off that ledge kid!" Magnus heard and his heart stopped.
"If I want to stand up here and risk my life, that's my decision asshole!" He heard Alec shout back.
"Alec, where are you?" Magnus asked worriedly.
"I'm at this really nice cliff. Or am I on a bridge?" Alec questioned to himself. "I'm definitely on a bridge."
"What bridge?" Magnus asked.
"Uh, I'm not sure. It's a tiny bridge but there are lots of rocks at the bottom." Alec playfully added which worried Magnus the most.
"Can you see a name?" Magnus asked as he gathered his belongings.
"Uh, I think that says St. Peters Memorial Bridge." Alec said and Magnus was running to his car. "Yup that's definitely what it says, but I'm also very drunk." Magnus knew where that bridge was. It wasn't far. He got into his car and started towards that bridge. He wasn't sure when him and Alec hung up but when he got to the bridge he saw Alec walking along the railing of the bridge and it scared the shit out of Magnus. He knew not to scare him so he approached carefully. "Alec." Magnus said and Alec looked up.
"Maggie." Alec said and Magnus normally hated when people called him that, but he couldn't find it in him to be annoyed with Alec right now. "What are you doing here?"
"You called me." Magnus said and Alec laughed as he almost slipped off the railing.
"Oh right. I did. I wanted to tell you something." Alec said and Magnus moved closer. "But you hung up on me."
"I'm sorry Alexander. I was in a little bit of a rush." Magnus said slowly moving closer to him.
"Why were you in a rush?" Alec asked as he hiccupped.
"Well, this guy called me tonight sounding very drunk and a little unstable and I thought maybe he needed to talk to someone." Magnus aid and Alec looked at him.
"Are you talking about me?" Alec questioned and Magnus took a deep breath.
"Yes Alexander." Magnus replied. "Why don't you come down from there and we can talk?"
"I don't really wanna talk. I want to forget." Alec said.
"Forget what?" Magnus asked. Curious as to what happened that made Alec act this way.
"Forget about everything. How I fucked up our relationship. How I'm never going to be good enough for my parents. How I'm thinking about jumping off this bridge and releasing my tortured soul from this world." Alec said and Magnus's eyes started to water.
"I have a lot of coffee back at my place, and those little doughnuts you like so much. We can listen to the sound of fire crackle while we warm up." Magnus offered and Alec stopped pacing the railing. "It's freezing out here Alexander, and I'm afraid all the alcohol in your system won't shield you from the cold for very much longer." Magnus could see Alec thinking his offer over. After what felt like forever to Magnus Alec jumped down from the railing and Magnus grabbed his hand and lead him to his car. The car ride was silent all the way back to his place. When they got up to Magnus's place Alec sat on the couch and just stared at the fireplace. When Magnus returned with two mugs of coffee and those doughnuts Alec didn't even notice. Magnus sat down next to him and waited until Alec spoke.
"I'm sorry I haven't told my parents yet." Alec finally said and he sounded like he was getting sober.
"What happened Alec? What made you go and get completely shitfaced on a Wednesday?" Magnus asked and Alec sighed and put his head in his hands.
"My little brother died a couple days ago." Alec said and Magnus felt like his heart shattered.
"Was he sick?" Magnus asked. There was no reason for a 9 year old to die so young.
"No. Drunk driver. My sister was driving him home from school." Alec explained and Magnus put his hand on his back to try and calm him down.
"Is your sister alright?" Magnus asked.
"Yea, she is emotionally and mentally torturing herself at the moment." Alec said.
"I am so sorry Alexander." Magnus said and he intertwined their hands. "I am so incredibly sorry." Magnus could tell Alec was crying now and he pulled him into a hug. Neither of them knew how long they sat there, but Magnus wasn't letting go and neither was Alec. Alec needed this, he needed Magnus and Magnus knew that.
When Alec finally fell asleep Magnus got up and continued to work on his homework. He kept glancing over at Alec who was sleeping on the couch. It had been hours since he fell asleep and Magnus couldn't possibly sleep in case he woke up so he actually finished his project and started cleaning up the space when he heard Alec stir. He walked over to the couch and Alec rubbed his eyes and took in his surroundings and than looked at Magnus.
"What happened?" Alec asked.
"You got extremely drunk and called me." Magnus said and Alec nodded. "I found you walking along a railing to a bridge."
"Oh." Alec said. "I vaguely remember walking there."
"You told me about your brother." Magnus said and Alec sighed. "I'm so sorry Alec."
"I can't even remember the last conversation we had." Alec said. "My little brother is dead, and I can't remember our last conversation, or the last time we hung out."
"That's normal after a loss. It'll come back to you." Magnus tried to reassure him.
"How do you know?" Alec nearly shouted at Magnus, but Magnus knew it had nothing to do with him.
"It took be almost 3 years to remember the last conversation I had with my mother." Magnus admitted and Alec looked at him. "I had given up the hope that I would ever remember, until one day I was out to dinner with a friend and I saw something that reminded me of the last time we spoke and it came flooding back."
"I didn't know." Alec said and Magnus smiled.
"It might take time Alexander. But I promise, somehow, you'll remember." Magnus said and Alec nodded. It was silent for a few minutes before Alec spoke again.
"In a couple days we're having a funeral for him." Alec said and he took a deep breath. "Will you come?" Magnus was shocked at his question.
"Uh, are you sure that's a good idea?" Magnus asked and Alec gave him a small smile.
"I'm going to need you there Magnus." Alec said truthfully and Magnus smiled at him.
"Of course I'll be there." Magnus said and he got up to grab Alec some blankets and pillow.
"Oh Magnus." He heard Alec say from behind him and he turned around. "I'm sorry for calling you Maggie." He said and Magnus laughed.
"All is forgiven Alexander." Magnus said and he went to his room to get him some things. These last like 7 months have been hard for Magnus, but he felt like this was a new beginning for them, and as much as this new beginning kinda sucked he was glad that they had this opportunity.