DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James
Chapter Four: I Just Might Regret That Night
APOV
2015
This nostalgic feeling enters my stomach as I make my way to the English department building. It's the feeling you get ever time the months of August and September roll around. Your stomach begins to coil, your hands begin to clam up, and your heart skips a beat with every step you take. First day of classes. The only thing different, I suppose, is the fact that as I make my way to the bricked-building I will no longer receive a kiss goodbye, or a "see you after class." This time I walk alone.
These last couple of months have been hard on me. I've spent my summer enduring the same routine: wake up, cry, try to eat, cry, sleep, cry, repeat. But this month will be different then all the others. My world no longer stops for him. My tears no longer fall for him. I no longer live for him.
As I enter my first class of senior year, I notice how much smaller the rooms are now that I am getting deep into my major. I am no longer staring at a lecture hall filled with anxious students wondering what their first day of college classes will be like, instead I am facing a small room filled with fifteen to twenty students anxiously waiting for what the rest of their life is going to become. I have decided to take a classical literature course since it is the type of literature I am most fond of. I've had this professor before, and I have always enjoyed his teaching style.
As I make my way inside the classroom, I decide on sitting in the middle. This placement has always been the best for me, not too close, but not too far. I set up my laptop, and decide to go through my phone as I wait for the rest of the students to file in.
"Is this seat taken?" I look up to see if whomever is talking, is talking to me. My eyes are brought to a very attractive man with dirty blonde hair and an extremely sweet smile. I can't help by shake my head, and smile in return.
"Um … no it's all yours." I move my chair over a little bit so that this attractive stranger could sit down beside me. Once he has sat down, and taken all of his note-taking materials out, he turns and faces me with a mega-watt smile.
"I'm Luke Sawyer, but a lot of my friends call me Sawyer."
"Anastasia Steele, but a lot of my friends call me Ana." Sawyer still has this immense smile, and I can't help but smile back. There's something refreshing and contagious about being with him.
"So you're a senior?" Sawyer asks as he opens his laptop. I nod in response.
"Well I'm one too, and what I'm really confused about is how I've never seen you. I mean I surely wouldn't forget meeting a beautiful girl like you." I can't help but blush at his statement. Where did this guy come from?
Sawyer and I continue our conversation until the professor walks it. First day of classes always consist of the same things: brief discussion on what the class will consist of, passing out of the syllabus, an awkward ice breaker activities, and the professor answering whatever questions the students may have. At the end of class, Sawyer and I gather our things, and walk out of the classroom together.
"Any more classes today?" Sawyer asks as we make our way out of the English Department.
"Nope, just one on Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays." I respond.
"That's nice. Well I just have one more around four, so do want to get lunch together?" I can't help but smile in response. Sawyer recommends going to this new pizza place that just opened up this year, so we head to that restaurant. We both order a couple slices of pizza, and I find a place for us to sit while Sawyer gets our drinks.
"Thanks." I mumble, mid-chew. Nice Steele. Throughout the lunch date, if you want to call it that, Sawyer tells me about his family. Surprisingly he lives in a town in Oregon that is not too far from Washington. He has one younger brother who's still in high school, and his parents have been happily married for many years. We talk about school, about home, about a lot of things actually, and I almost lose track of time. By the two-hour mark I realize I should probably head back to the apartment.
"So I'll see you Wednesday?" Sawyer asks after we both throw out our trash, and head out of the restaurant.
"Yeah." We are both standing in front of the restaurant unsure of what to do.
"Or we could see each other tomorrow night? Maybe 8-ish?" Sawyer whispers, and I can't help but smile at the slight blush he has.
"Ye-yeah sure." We exchange phone numbers, and I can't help but walk with a little more pep in my step.
"I can't believe you have a date Steele." Kate sighs.
"Trust me … I am just as surprised as you are." Kate and I are currently watching tv, each holding a carton of our favorite ice creams. I don't know why they call it the freshman 15 because I swear every year I come back I gain at least five unwanted pounds.
"So he must be cute."
"He is." I say with a blush. I couldn't help but think about him for the rest of the day. This is the first time in awhile that I have been truly happy, and trust me when I say that there's something empowering about being wanted.
"Wow Steele. I'm so happy for you." Kate says with a smile, and I flash her a smile in return. For the rest of the night we can't help ourselves, but talk about my future date: what I'm going to wear, if I'm going to let Kate do my makeup, where we might go, if I'm going to let Kate do my makeup,etc.
It's already Tuesday, and my palms have been extremely clammy all day. I haven't had a first date in a really long time, and I can't help but wonder if I'm going to blow it. Will I talk about myself too much? How much cash should I bring? Did I give him the right number? What if he gets lost? What if h-
"Ms. Steele?" My english professor's stern voice pulls me out of my chaotic thoughts.
"Yes?" I murmur.
"I see that you have something more important to think about than this class." I feel my cheeks heat up full force at her statement. This particular english class focuses on the technicalities of english literature, and it is definitely not the highlight of my Tuesdays and Thursdays. I've had this professor before, and she always seems to have a stick up her ass no matter what the day is. I try to hide myself behind my hair for the rest of class, then when we are dismissed I book it to the apartment.
By the time I get there I have T-minus 3 hours to get myself ready … physically and mentally. Kate gets back to the apartment at around 7:00 so she is able to curl my hair, and do a my makeup. Thank god Kate is into that stuff, and really knows how to do it because if it was me than it would turn out to be a hot mess. We decided to do a pretty natural eye look, with a bold red lip. I wasn't too sure about it, but Kate told me to trust her, and I sure do. The dress I picked out to wear is one that I haven't worn in a while. It is a nude dress, that is covered in black lace, and it is one of my absolute favorite dresses to wear. No matter what mood I'm in, it somehow always finds a way to make me feel my best. After Kate, and I are finished with my look, I go and stand in front of my full length mirror to see how I look all together.
"You look hot Steele." Kate says with a smile. She is wearing this proud mom facial expression, and I can't help but laugh. I walk over to Kate, and give her a huge hug.
"Thanks Kavanagh." I whisper.
"No problem Steele." Kate whispers back. Kate and I have been through alot together, and I honestly don't know what I would do without her. This summer was one of the hardest ones for me, and Kate was by my side every single day. And here she is again, coming to the rescue, to make sure that I feel and look my best tonight.
We both turn towards the door at the sound of the bell, then look back at each other and squeal. By the way we're acting you would think this was my first date, and we were pre-teens. I rush over to the door while Kate is spraying me with some perfume. I then stop, take a few deep breaths to calm myself, and pull open the door. The smile that was on my face just a second ago has quickly transformed into a frown, and my stomach that was filled with butterflies is now tied in knots, and I'm not too sure if I will or will not throw up in a second.
"Christian?"
AN: dun Dun DUN! Sorry for the cliff hanger, but when I thought about this chapter I felt like it had to be done. Also I definitely need to apologize for being M.I.A. trust me when I say it's not because I wanted to be. This story is taking a lot out of me creatively, and it takes me a really long time to plan out and write the chapters. I feel like I am constantly writing and erasing when it comes to this story, so please don't be too mad because I really do want to post more frequently, it's just taking me some time. Sorry that this chapter is so short, I'm hoping that my next chapters will be MUCH longer. Wow, a lot of apologies this author's note. Also the chapter titles for these past two chapters are lyrics from the song "Satisfied" in Hamilton the musical. I'm completely obsessed with that show so I had to do it. Until next time!