The first day of Duro's exile to the pit was uneventful with Cassia and Varro mutually avoiding one another, neither wanting to address the obvious tension in the room. The next evening followed suit, neither looking at the other or speaking but by morning Varro was unable to hold it in any longer. Getting the truth off his chest and expressing his true feelings would at least offer some peace of mind.
Knowing he didn't have much time, Varro begins speaking as soon as Cassia arrives in the medicus, her icy glare not deterring him. Cassia stops in the doorway, trying to decide if she even needs to listen to Varro.
"I loved Aurelia the moment I laid my eyes on her. It wasn't reciprocated, she wouldn't even acknowledge me. I eventually realized we weren't going to end up together until one day I was told I was getting married; apparently I had taken too long for my parents liking. I was livid, being told whom I should love and forced into a union. All I knew was the person owed my father money, instead of making a public embarrassment of the family, it was decided to join our two families in union." Contempt flashes over Varro's face as he recalls the incident before he continues, "Imagine my surprise when I found out the girl was Aurelia." Completely annoyed by his actions, Cassia finds herself listening with intent, even noting a small smile on his lips before it slowly fades.
"As you, she's very good at the silent treatment, but over time her feelings changed towards me. I started working alongside our fathers, both businessmen. I made a few poor choices, and her resentment resurfaced. It was as if nothing I did was ever good enough. She'd easily forgetten all the happiness we shared and became a shrew, thus the gambling started. It started as an escape, and then it became a means as resources dried up. When I was in over my head, debtors were coming to take everything and it was beyond anyone's influence or control. I couldn't have my wife and child without so I decided entering this ludus would be a way to pay off debtors and restore my honor. In two years we could start fresh. Naturally she disagreed with me, wanting to run north to her brother's but I insisted."
Cassia shifts and Varro glances over to her, "I'm beginning to feel you view me in the same light. I'll never be enough," Varro confesses lowering his head and speaking in a soft voice, "I love you and I know you feel the same way but there's got to be a compromise here," Varro looks at her pleadingly. Cassia feels her heart wrench knowing he's right.
Cassia stoically sat on the bed, occasionally getting up for a drink or a trip to the toilet. She had taken it upon herself to dismiss further assistance since she was now well enough to move around on her own, Marina reluctantly returning to her duties. Cassia was appreciating the silence, allowing her to ponder over Varro's words and consider whether she could take a leap of faith, or if she even had the courage to break Duro's heart.
Shortly after dinner, Duro wanders in to find Cassia blankly staring at the wall with her untouched food nearby on the table.
"Cassia…" he softly begins, not wanting to startle her. Cassia's eyes flicker to him and she smiles, sliding off the bench and hobbling over to Duro.
"I'm glad you visited the bath," Cassia teases and Duro crinkles his nose.
"The bath now looks like the pit," he retorts as he pushes hair from her face confessing, "I've missed you."
Cassia simply smiles, unable to shake the nagging guilt of Varro's company during Duro's absence while he was suffering and worrying alone in the pit. Duro reaches for her hand, "Come, and let's sit. There's nothing more I'd like to do than just hold you." He leads her to the bed positioning himself and waiting for her to curl next to him.
Cassia slides next to Duro, wrapping an arm behind his back and the other around his torso in an embrace, placing her head on his shoulder she lets out a soft sigh as he wraps his arms around her.
Duro kisses the top of Cassia's head and rests his chin there whispering, "This has been all I've been dreaming about."
Cassia pulls away, looking up at the man. He gives her a lopsided smile before leaning down and planting a sweet kiss on her lips, following up with a more passionate and aggressive one. Cassia gives into him but soon finds herself wishing they were Varro's lips instead, scenes from the past two days dancing around her head. She pulls away with a deep sigh before speaking with a shaky voice, "I don't deserve you."
Duro cups her face, brows knitting together in confusion. He can't help but wonder if she is feverish, she is certainly stubborn enough to refuse help and it would explain why her food was cold.
Duro's confusion only intensifies when Cassia swallows to fight back the obvious tears pooling in her eyes. Attempting to calm her, Duro slowly rubs a thumb over her cheek, "Having you makes it all worth it."
Cassia vehemently shakes her head as she eases off the bed, attempting to create distance between her and Duro. He moves to stand but Cassia brings her hands up motioning for him to remain sitting.
"Duro I haven't been considerate of your affections. I vowed to give this a chance with the purest intentions but I've failed," Cassia fights to remain calm as she forces honesty.
"Did something happen to sway you? Have I not proven my worth or shown you…" Duro appeals whilst trying to understand Cassia's temperament.
Unable to hold back any longer, tears freely begin cascading down Cassia's face as she chokes out, "You've done more than necessary. More than I've deserved."
Duro remains quietly staring off in the distance as her words reverberate and the realization stings.
Cassia wraps her arms around herself, watching the man idly sit there. Although it is too late, she wishes circumstances were different and she hadn't just stomped on his heart.
Duro slowly blinks as he stands, avoiding eye contact with Cassia as he silently walks out of the medicus.
Varro rubs his face as he struts into the dining room, swiftly grabbing a bowl of grub and sitting across from Spartacus who merely nods in acknowledgement.
Taking the cue from Spartacus, Varro quietly eats as he surveys the room. Most of the men are silent, mentally preparing themselves for another grueling day of training in the heat but a few jovially converse earning glares from their sleepy peers.
Varro's glare settles upon Duro and he can't help but watch out of curiosity. He's sitting next to Agron per usual but Duro is hunched over his bowl with his hands cradling his head and wearing a look of utter defeat.
Normally Varro wouldn't care, even though he's enjoyed crushing Duro's spirits on more than one occasion but there was something virtually unsettling about Duro's appearance.
Swallowing his mouthful of food, Varro leans over the table and asks with a tilt of his head, "What's gotten into him?"
"Ah, haven't you heard? His heart's been broken," Spartacus says without looking up from his meal.
Varro momentarily lowers his spoon at Spartacus's response, wondering if it meant what he's been yearning for but he banishes it from his mind, he's been down the path of false hope before with Cassia.
"The first time's always the worst," Varro adds.
Spartacus knowingly smiles, "Indeed."
Varro spots Cassia standing near the gates, sensing hesitation as she looks out onto the streets. It was the Consulate festival, celebrating Consus, the god responsible for the protection of the harvest. Typically on festival days, both slaves and gladiators were free to celebrate but many of the non-Romans preferred to remain in the ludus as they did not worship the same deities.
Varro adjusts his tunic as he approaches the gate, stopping alongside Cassia and glancing over, the woman nervously biting the inside of her cheek as she continues to scan the street.
"Do you want to go?" he asks. Cassia curiously eyes Varro, surely the man knew about Duro by now. Looking out into the street once again, Cassia can't help but remember the last time she left the gates.
"I didn't want to go alone…" she trails off but Varro insists.
"That is understandable considering. What better way to attend than with your own personal gladiator?" his reassurance calming her nerves and her desire to leave the ludus outweighing her reluctance to be alone with Varro.
"Yes." Cassia smiles as the two head into the street.
Cassia fidgets with her hands before adding, "This was always one of my favorite festivals."
Varro smiles at her confession, "The chariot races, music, or the sacrificial lamb?"
"I always liked the chariot races but it kind of seems silly now considering I live with a bunch of gladiators," Cassia laughs to herself.
The two quietly take in the scenery of the crowd; some dancing to the music while others converse with neighbors, people openly sharing food and wine, a few even offering Varro and Cassia tastes.
The food was probably Cassia's favorite part of the day since it was much better than what she generally ate at the ludus.
After another sampling, Varro licks his fingers testing, "What now?"
"I think I need to sit for a spell," Cassia confesses as her stitches were itching and her body was aching from the walking. Varro nods, grabbing her wrist to lead her through the crowd, occasionally looking back at her. They are nearly to the fountain when Cassia spots, him. Her father, Cassian, was standing just beyond Varro. Panic sets in as she tugs back, Varro swivels to look and she shakes her head. The music is loud and she can see Varro mouth, 'What?' Cassia attempts to plant her feet but Varro's overpowering and she just stumbles into Varro. In turn, Varro steps back unintentionally bumping into Cassian.
Varro sends an apology over his shoulder, clutching Cassia's waist while focusing on the panic in her eyes.
"Cassia?" The man calls after but Cassia refuses to look back, instead she picks up her pace as Varro leads her to a side street.
Cassia nearly collapses in Varro's arms; he allows her a moment to catch her breath before inquiring, "What was that?"
Cassia only shakes her head in response, not ready to admit it was her father. Cassia's breaths are shaky as she fights back the urge to cry with her face buried into his chest. Varro's hand is stroking her back, attempting to calm the distraught woman.
Without looking up Cassia softly replies, "It was my father." Varro inhales with her revelation, her sudden panic attack making sense. They literally ran into the root of her trust issues, betrayal by someone who should protect you. Varro can feel his blood boiling knowing only a few centimeters had separated him from the cowardice of a man.
Varro's heart sinks when he hears another soft hiccup from her, gently placing a kiss in her hair Varro whispers, "I'll always protect you."
"Promise?"
"As long as my heart is beating," the sincerity in Varro's voice is almost overwhelming and Cassia has to once again fight back tears.
Between breaths Cassia begs, "Please take me home," no longer in the mood to enjoy the festival.
Varro places his hand on the small of her back, guiding her through the streets to the villa. Cassia pauses in the archway that leads to the medicus.
"Stay," Cassia nervously blurts.
Varro's jaw tenses wanting nothing more than to be with Cassia but reluctant to give in, unsure if he could handle Cassia being indignant to him again tomorrow.
Sensing his hesitancy, she places a finger on his lips before he can speak, instead Cassia implores, "Stay because I love you. I can no longer pretend or ignore the fact, I love you."