They say home is where your heart is but what a shame
Cause everyone's heart doesn't beat the same
Caleb's POV
Oh shit.
Tomorrow's the last day of submitting the demographics project. I think about the past few days I blew off completely, doing my research on Erudite.
I barely have anything resembling a project on my tab. I need to put it down by tomorrow.
…
"What do we do now?" I ask Rhiannon.
"All my earlier suggestions were rejected by you." She says coldly.
"Sorry, we don't have time to argue or decide anything. Just say whatever you want and I'll make it into a project." So we begin with me typing feverishly and she begins by saying stuff. We don't have time to do a survey so we filch some recent data from the digital library. Honestly, I think we even made up some figures. Who would see, anyway?
By the time we get up, my eyes are itching behind their glasses. I was about to take them off. They are for show anyway. But Rhiannon gives me one of her pouty faces and it is too hard to take them off. I bet those glasses are looking at her smugly and are glad for another day of sitting on my nose.
I rub my eyes behind the glasses. We go off our separate ways.
…
"I said I am looking for someone! He's an initiate." An innately familiar voice speaks out.
"Beatrice?"
I look over at her. Looking at her makes the two compartments of my mind blur together. Like I am not sure where one ends and the other one begins. Looking at her reminds that while I have changed, she has too. She holds herself like someone who makes the rules, rather than one who follows them.
She is dressed completely in black, her long blonde hair standing out in stark contrast. Her hands are covered in scars and she clearly notices that I am staring at her. The book in my hand threatens to fall and disturb the plastic peace of this place.
She throws her arms around me and I have no other choice than to wrap mine around her. She is the only feasible bit of family that I have now. But I don't know whether to call her my sister or not. We are like caterpillars that underwent metamorphosis.
Beatrice still feels like home. Like stolen oatmeal cookies and whispered reprimands. Although her arms could probably break mine into microscopic fragments.
"You have a tattoo." It is the first thing my stupid brain could say. Why do I grab onto the facts first?
"And you have glasses." She sasses back. A calculative glance is aimed at me.
"Your vision is perfect, what are you doing?" I can't exactly say that a girl (I might or might not have a teeny-tiny crush on her) has settled those glasses on top of my nose so I take the clumsy way out.
"Um... let's get out of here." As mentioned earlier, everything here is plastic. You can never be too careful about anything. She doesn't know whatever I say here will probably bite me in my ass later.
I run out of the building nervously. I lead her to the Millennium, over to that weird bean sculpture. I know I'm really crazy sometimes. Who wants to undergo a serious discussion while being constantly reminded of dinner?
"What are you doing here?" It's better to begin with the facts first. It makes you seem more in control, even when everything is hopelessly slipping away. Like Beatrice. Like this city.
"I wanted to go home, and you were the closest thing I could think of." What was she actually thinking? Oh right, The Dauntless do first, then they think later.
"Don't be so pleased to see me." She says. Wow, what did she even expect? She has a terrible understanding of cause and effect relations.
"Hey, I'm really pleased to see you okay? It's just that some things aren't allowed. There are rules." Yes, that, is the darling-of-all-moms, responsible Caleb Prior taking over. When did the Dauntless even care about rules? I'm probably challenging her to gatecrash Jeanine Matthews' meetings.
"I don't care." That was the exact reaction I expected.
The next ten minutes are spent in making her see reason. I hate to admit, I would rather not get in trouble with her faction. Those tattooed people could break my neck as easily as they lift a fifty pound dumbbell.
We walk around, trying to diffuse the air of tension that blue and black contrast brings. Everything was so much better when it was grey. I guess colours make you stand for something. They make you the way you are.
Time to divulge the truth.
"Something big is happening, Beatrice. Something is wrong. People seem shifty; they jump around, as if waiting for the pot to boil over. Jeanine gives speeches about how corrupt Abnegation is, almost every day."
"Do you believe her?" She asks.
"No, maybe I don't. I...don't even know what to believe." It's true. These past few weeks have done nothing but confuse me even more.
She puts her own spin to things. She seems to owe more allegiance to her old faction. I would advise her to keep an open mind. She believes that I am being manipulated. Well, she is seriously underestimating me.
"Yeah. How could I possibly know what a corrupt faction looks like? I am just training to be a Dauntless, for God's sake. At least I know what I am a part of. You are choosing to ignore what we've known our entire lives. These people are arrogant and greedy and they will lead you nowhere."
"I think you should go, Beatrice." My voice hardens invariably. Driving her out is much easier than driving the doubts out of my own mind.
"With pleasure. Oh, and not that it will matter to you but mom told me to tell you to research the simulation serum."
She cannot know that mom met me earlier. Though I cannot seem to conclude exactly why she would meet Beatrice and tell her to pass that information to me.
Now it's time to flip that switch again. Now it's time for me to slip into another version of myself, the one which I absolutely despise.
"You saw her? Why didn't she-?" My voice threatens to break and I am sickly amazed at how good of a liar I am. I lied to Beatrice, I lied to my family and I lied to my friends.
I think I lied to myself.
...
"Do you have any idea why my sister's name was on the top of that list we found in the Dauntless server?" Tristan looks over to me weirdly.
"You mean, Beatrice Prior is your sister?" He asks.
"I can not exactly blame myself if you have such a short memory. And she is my sister." I kind of doubt that myself after seeing her today.
"No need of getting so snippy. I have no idea what that list is for. Maybe for the ones at the top, maybe the ones at the bottom, it could mean anything. Let me do my research." He goes out of the room, probably to bring Anahita along.
I glance at the list, copied down on a piece of paper. I thought it'd be safer this way; paper can be destroyed any time.
Beatrice's name is at the top of that list. The other names, Uriah Pedrad and another don't make any sense to me. Is Beatrice doing that bad in her faction, to guarantee her name in that list?
Don't get so paranoid. It's probably not that bad as you think.
...
Tristan comes back with Anahita, holding her hand. I honestly did not know when. I might have been staring into space for hours. Uh, better switch to 'leader mode' now.
"Tristan, you have done well, I am not afraid to admit that I don't exactly know what the names in that list mean. I want the both of you to pinch whatever info you get on these initiates. Meanwhile, I will continue my research on Aptitude flexibility."
"Again? You mean I need to do this again? You don't know anything about the magnitude of risks involved." Tristan says.
"Don't you dare back out of this now; all of us are knee deep in this. All of us will go down together, if we are caught. I guarantee it." I assure him.
"I need your blood promise, brother." I completely ignore the fact that he called me brother.
"What is a blood promise?"
"It is the gravest of all oaths you can take. It is a Dauntless tradition. A blood promise is when two people collect blood on their hands and hold each other's hands, while speaking the words of the promise. It also signifies a bond of brotherhood or comradeship. And before you talk about sexism, girls also do this. A blood promise ceases only when one of the two dies." Tristan says gravely. I know immediately that a blood promise is not something to be taken lightly.
Tristan brings out a knife, probably stolen from somewhere. It must be a Dauntless thing, to always have some means of defence or protection on your person. He makes a small but deep puncture wound on the inside of his left forearm. He collects the dripping blood on his right hand. Anahita watches with wide and disgusted eyes. He passes the small silver and awfully sharp knife to me. I brace myself for bearing pain.
I stare at the silver knife, tainted with Tristan's blood. Then, a gross medical fact comes into my head.
What if I get AIDS? Shit, health risks are not something to be played with.
I run to the sink and wash the blade, not caring for disrespect or anything. The blood on his hand is starting to thicken.
It hurts so much, but fighting pain with pain works. As I pierce my skin with the knife, I bite my lip as hard as I can. The blood collects in my right hand and he extends his hand to mine.
We hold each other's hands while Tristan announces the terms of this promise and asks me to repeat them. I can barely hide the disgust on my face.
He finally lets go of my hand and runs to the sink to disinfect them with antibacterial soap. The water runs pink in the basin. Only now do I notice that I bit my lip hard enough to draw blood. The characteristic metallic taste pervades my mouth.
"You are officially my brother now. My mom said that people who share blood promises share a bond almost as deep as a real blood relation. You must be wondering why I did this, right?"
"Yes"
"Even I don't know why. Maybe I did this to reassure myself that all of us will be going down together. Lone wolves are appreciated in Dauntless, but the best people are the ones who can work in a team. Betrayal is not taken lightly, especially in war. And I know that we are getting unbelievably close to war."
"Thank you, brother." The word sounds foreign on my tongue. All my life I had a sister, one who is drifting farther away from me with every passing second.
But I cannot deny that it feels like family. Maybe I can find a home here.
...
This research thing is really starting to get to my head now. I still don't know why this Aptitude flexibility or Divergence is such a big deal.
Serum D2 is a serum containing long range transmitters and receivers which can control and even manipulate the stimuli aimed a human brain. It is exactly like the serum they use in the aptitude tests, except it works over a longer distance.
Suddenly a piece clicks in my head. I skim through all the speeches and publications written after the election of Jeanine Matthews as Erudite representative. This is an old routine but I need to confirm what I think I had already known.
I think about Mom's warnings, how Abnegation is preparing for the worse.
And I think I know why the long distance transmitters are required in this case, and Max's deep involvement with Jeanine.
Jeanine is planning war on Abnegation.
As soon as I think of this, I know that it is true.
...
"Rhian, we've got really bad news."
"What?" She is bewildered by my sudden declaration.
"We need to go to a safe place before I tell you." She fishes the storage closet key out of her jeans, grabs my wrist and leads me to the back of the automobile forge. I would have a raging shade of red on my cheeks if not for the awful situation hanging over me. I am thankful that no one is around.
"This is a safe place. Tell me now."
I tell her about Jeanine's sinister plans to burn Abnegation down to the ground. And I think she is going to mind-control the Dauntless into doing her evil bidding. I also tell her about the aptitude flexibility issue.
"I am not supposed to tell this to you, but I think you have earned my trust." She breaks the graveyard silence.
"The first fact, Alev is my brother. Second, I had lost a brother due to this very same 'aptitude flexibility'" Her voice cracks but she continues steadily a second later.
"After my brother died, Alev explained about Nigel to me. It was his second year as initiate instructor and risked a great deal by disclosing about aptitude flexibility to me." It takes a second to realise that Nigel must be the name of her deceased brother.
"The thing about aptitude flexibility is that it seems almost genetic, predominant in initiates who have parents transferred from different factions. My mother was an Amity transfer, while my father was a born Erudite. Alev suspects that I also might have a certain degree of aptitude flexibility, but not enough to put me on the radar or get me killed."
"And what are the people who have a flexible aptitude known as?" I ask but I think I already know the answer.
"The Divergent." The forbidden word slips past her lips like a curse. Rhiannon confirms what the factionless guy, Jordan McCullough had told me.
"And by any chance, was Nigel's death disguised as a suicide attempt?"
"H...how do you know? Her voice stutters.
"The suicide attempt was so convincing that everyone associated with our family believed that Nigel had committed suicide. It is a duty of every initiation instructor under Jeanine's rule that he or she must administer the poison to initiates who are confirmed divergent. But seeing as Alev and Nigel had blood relations, the job was assigned to someone else. Alev has been doing his research for a long time but he still doesn't know who killed Nigel."
"So, you mean to say that every initiation instructor needs to carry the taint of murder on their forehead, as duty?" I'm losing faith in the faction system with every passing day. Now I know which jobs to not sign up for after initiation ends.
"Yes, they do. The sickest thing about his death was that the whole crime scene was dressed up. Nigel's body was hanged on the ceiling by a rope. The killer was very clever. He or she must have administered a sedative to him first, so he doesn't show signs of struggle, hung him up and gave the poison afterwards to either make it more painful or to completely eliminate the doubt whether he was dead or not." She says all of this without a hint of remorse, like stating a fact but I know that she does this to remove herself from the pain. It's a technique that all Abnegation use.
And now I know, how much of a curse divergence must be to her. She is stronger than me. I cannot even imagine losing Beatrice. I wrap one arm around her shoulder to offer comfort, but I know that she doesn't need it. She brushes my arm away and I feel a stab just behind my ribcage.
...
And now I know that I must know about my family's heritage if I want to find out why Beatrice's name was on the list. The city records are in the Abnegation offices and I am sure that they have genealogical records of every citizen. I need to call an emergency meeting.
We gather on one table during dinner. I tell everyone to bend down, as if we were sharing a dirty joke.
"Okay, who wants to plan a heist now?" Three hands rise.
...
"The Abnegation office is situated smack-dab in the middle of the Abnegation sector, right beside the hall where city council meetings are held." I show them the Abnegation map in my tab.
"Once you enter the office, look for any room which says 'genealogical'. I'm pretty sure there is a room like that. Most of Abnegation's data is stored in paper files. Grab the file which has 'Andrew Prior' on it. Remember to have a pair of gloves with you."
"And what if there isn't any room like that?"
"I guess it is a failed mission then." I'm not usually fatalistic like that, mind you.
"All houses in Abnegation look exactly the same. If you're lost in the residential segment, look for the house number on the front door. I'll come and find you. And, do wear whatever clothes you have which are closest to a shade of grey. "
"What about communication equipment?" Rhiannon asks. I resist the urge to face palm at my own reasoning. Of course, how will we go on a mission without comm. equipment?
"I do have a set of microphones in my parents' apartment, but I have two pairs of microphones and we'll need all of our 'phones to be connected to each other." Rhiannon says.
"Don't worry I'll fix it. Just bring a set of the smallest screwdrivers you have." Anahita replies. I'm getting more amazed by everyone every passing day. Even Tristan looks at her with (kind of) disbelief and adoration.
"What? You thought I was an airhead, huh? I know about music and audio equipment, since my mom works in the music department in Amity."
"You got it, Ana." Rhian says.
"But before you do this heist business, I need Caleb to steal four cups of good, strong, coffee." Tristan says.
...
"All set?" I ask.
"Affirmative" "Locked and loaded" "Positive" Come three replies.
We decide to go on the straight road running on the border of the common ground and the factionless sector, after the straight road we decide to take the curving road parallel to the marsh passing through the factionless sector, straight into Abnegation. Tristan had suggested following the public bus route and then continuing straight into Abnegation but then we would risk getting spotted by the Candor.
"Let's go then."
We clip our microphones, wear our gloves and follow the road. All of us have backpacks with a heavy book inside but no means of self defence, because the only available option was a fork or a butter knife. Stealing those off the dinner table would have been suspicious. The only choice would be to deal a blow on the head with the backpack.
We come to the broad, curving road which leads to Abnegation. I used to go to school by following this road. Although I am going home now. The road and the surrounding factionless encampment are in the same wrecked state that I remember so well. The road is littered with broken street lamps and the majority of it is pitch dark. We don't risk switching our flashlights on. The factionless can get vicious when they see unfamiliar people around.
And I speak from firsthand experience. I think about Visiting Day, when I had met Mom and Jordan and June a million years and a thousand months ago.
The road tired me out on the previous journey but the adrenaline in the air has sharpened my abilities. The road quickly passes by and we are near the grey houses.
The office is right in the centre of the Abnegation sector, beside the council meeting hall. There are many windows beside the main entrance but breaking and entering is not exactly my style. The main gate is unlocked, just as I expected. Typical of the Abnegation to not give a damn about security.
"Let me scout the location. Tristan, keep watch beside the main entrance. Anahita, I would advise that you stay with Tristan. Raise a warning in the microphones if you see anyone that would be a potential risk to the success of the mission. Rhiannon, come inside the building with me."
"Okay."
"Why did you bring me inside when there's two computer experts right outside the building?" She asks as we step inside the hallway of the bare building. There was no lock on the main gate but every room from here is locked.
"Because Abnegation pays more attention to physical security rather than digital security. The computers you'll find here are ancient. I know my way around these old computers. And I am guessing that you would know how to pick a lock?"
"Yeah, I do. But don't expect that I would pluck a hairpin from my head and jimmy the lock with that."
"So what will you use?"
"There is a reason why they don't show you the real deal in movies. You'll see for yourself soon." She switches her flashlight on.
We search the first floor, there is nothing interesting there. I have to bet everything on the second floor.
"Come on, let's go up."
The second floor is a mirror image of the first floor, the individual offices of each council member were on the left side on the first floor, and they are on the right side on the second floor. So, it means that we would have to follow the left wall to find the genealogy room.
Aha. Just what I was thinking. There is a genealogical record room.
"Come here, Rhian. Here's the room."
"Move aside."
She brings a few tools out of her pack and gets to work. I know these locks are not very secure. In a few minutes the lock falls open with a clink.
I find the Andrew Prior file after a lot of searching. Who knew sifting through paper files would give you such a workout? I need to read this file but I am not sure whether I am ready for it or not. This file holds so many answers to a lot of questions, but I am afraid of knowing the answers.
Time is running out. I open the file and there it is, all the mysteries in my life revealed. I know my birthday and Beatrice's birthday. Andrew Prior was an Erudite transferred to Abnegation while Natalie Prior was a Dauntless transfer to Abnegation. The file also lists the names of my deceased paternal grandparents. Too bad, I would have loved to meet them. But my mom's information has a lot of fields missing. I wonder why it is so. There are no names of her parents, no siblings or other relatives. My dad seems to have no siblings, according to the file.
"Caleb, suspicious activity near the front gate. I would advise to get the hell out quickly." Tristan's voice breaks the silence of the room.
"Rhian, we've got to get out of here. Can you lock the door now?"
"It's going to make an awful amount of noise and I don't think it will work."
"Then we cannot risk it. I hope they do not run an investigation for breaking and entering. Let's go."
"Out of the window?"
"Yes, Tristan reported that the person was in front of the main gate."
Leap of faith now. I open the window and survey the drop. It's only a two floor jump but it can still break my shins if I'm not careful.
"Don't try to land on your feet, jump like a cat, on four limbs and roll on the ground as soon as you hit it." Rhian probably knows this but I'm babbling like an idiot.
"I'm jumping now." I leap off the windowsill. For a frightful millisecond I am in mid air. Then the ground rushes towards me and I land on my forearms and thighs. I roll on the ground to distribute the force.
Rhiannon is already on the ground. We don't have much time left.
"Let's run away!"
"The rendezvous point is the road just beside the meeting hall. The house number is... It is too risky for us to meet near the main gate." Tristan says in my earpiece.
"Affirmative" The house which he mentioned is not too far from where I am right now. But I risk looking at the main gate.
The main gate has two people near it. Both of them are council members I don't recognise.
The rendezvous point is near my old house. I cannot resist checking up on mom and dad just for one last time.
"Rhiannon, I'm going to my house, okay? Follow this road and you'll get to the rendezvous point. Tell Tristan that I'll meet him after ten to fifteen minutes. You can search for me if I don't come after twenty minutes. Alright?"
"Alright. Come back, okay?"
"I cannot promise that. Goodbye."
There is a detour which leads to my house, which Beatrice and I used when we played hide and seek. It passes my house and leads to Susan's house if I walk that dirt path a little further.
Everything looks the same way as I had left it before. The house is the same but the people that are living in it or used to live in it have changed completely. A silent tear slips down my cheek and I mourn for my old life here.
The lawn is neatly trimmed; the number plate still has the tarnish on its bronze. The creepers on the boundary wall are still there. I remember how Beatrice once fried an ant with a magnifying glass in the garden.
I walk inside the boundary wall and risk a glance at my old bedroom window. It is too dark to make anything out.
A hand clamps my arm. I am about to let out a scream when another hand clamps over my mouth. The person feels familiar for some reason.
"Who are you?" The voice asks.
"Father? Is that you?"
...
Yeah, see who decided to get off her lazy ass (After god knows how many weeks) and upload another chapter?
It's me, of course. The last song was a Green Day song from their album Kerplunk!, 'Cause She's 2000 Light Years Away'. This one is also a Green Day song. (It's getting really, really predictable, right?)