Well, the children of High School is a Fucking Mess are staring to talk prom! Who's wearing what, and who's going to have the best promposal? Riley's certain her dress won't be long and flowy, after all, her and Carissa are certainly an alternative couple both in dress and action! But maybe...not everyone is happy with who's going with who. But graduation is just around the corner and even those who are excited about their futures can get emotional at this time in their life, low-key terrified of change- of that big leap into the world. This chapters a big one, but the next one is even bigger. So I hope you'll enjoy it! Oh, and the lead singer of Aries on Fire is now named Crystal due to personal reasons that I'd rather not explain to strangers. I will eventually go back and edit chapters changing all of the times the name Claire is mentioned to Crystal, but I just wanted to give you guys the FYI.

"We've only been eighteen for a week, guys, are you sure we should rush into getting a tattoo? I-I mean what if we regret it? Removing them is painful!" Fear draws his knees to his chest as he watches the main screen, the consent forms are being signed and Riley's drivers license is paper clipped to the top of it.

"Not to sound cynical." But does Sadness ever sound anything but? That's almost a silly phrase in itself, "She would be able to tolerate the pain considering everything she's been through and done to herself. Besides, it's got a lot of meaning. She has to."

"And it's even more special because Carissa was sweet enough to wait until Riley turned eighteen to get her first tattoo with her!" Another lovesick sigh as Joy rests her head atop her hands, "That's really romantic. They're both gonna' get theirs done at the same time!"

"Speaking of Carissa-" Disgust has other things on her mind right now, "Does anyone else think that because Carissa initiated getting back together that Riley should be the one to ask her to prom?"

"That's a great idea!" Joy is immediately on board, "What should we do- how should we ask?!"

"If you ask me." Nobody did, Anger, but they know it won't stop you, "This whole 'promposal' nonsense is ridiculous."

"It may be ridiculous, but I'm totally down to plan something bad ass." Disgust, as a matter of fact, has been thinking about it for almost three weeks now, "Riley's been learning 21 Guns by Green Day on guitar." All of the emotions eye her with confusion. Clearly, they are not following where she's going with this, "I think we should play it for her and surprise her and then ask!"

Joy's eyes widen, "That's...that's really sweet."

"And I have to admit, it's not too over the top." It actually makes Anger smile, "I really like that. I could get on board." In fact, he's got some ideas of his own, "On Friday they're doing the Senior Variety show during eighth and ninth period, we can sign up, play it, dedicate it to her and end it by asking her to prom."

Disgust is sensing something, "...But Jensen is going to be there, then. The entire senior class is going to be there which means she will be too."

And his face says it all, "Exactly."

"...I love you, Anger."

"So, let's practice that song when we get home, hm?"

"Alright, but let's not plant the idea in her head until after she get's this tattoo done. We don't want her accidentally blurting out to Carissa."

"You ready, dork?" Carissa, standing in front of her with the biggest grin, the excitement clear on her face, "You never told me what you're gonna' get."

"You never told me either." She stands, joining her girlfriend as they approach the glass counter and hand their forms in, "You first, then I'll tell. And if it has meaning you have to explain it!"

"Okay, okay, deal. First off, it's gonna' go on my right right arm, just a little below my shoulder and on the side of my arm obviously, so it isn't hidden. But, uh, I'm getting a bat- not like, a batman symbol bat, like a real, realistic bat. Wings outstretched, but within the black wings will be some stars and a crescent moon, so the wings will look like the night sky- it'll be mostly shades of black and stuff." She'll run her fingers through her hair, "Honestly, kinda' represents me I guess. Like, y'know everyone looks at me and see's the dyke with the punk clothes, which is great. I love that, but...there's also more to me than the way I look. You were the first to really get to see that too. That I'm also kind of a nerd, and sometimes I like to listen to music without words or build things with my dad or look for obscure places to admire. So when I open my wings, you see this gorgeous picture of the night because, well, there's more to me than meets the eye when you get to know me."

"That's a really great tattoo for you, babe,"

But Carissa isn't finished yet. Perhaps this has been building for a while. And with prom and graduation around the corner, maybe her emotions are a bit high, "...When you look at the sky, the stars all look the same at first glance, but if we were to see them up close, we would see that there's not only tons more, but that no two stars look the same- that some are even clusters or galaxies...you just have to take a closer look to realize it." And another silly confession (or at least that's how Carissa see's it), "Y'know, our band's been pickin' up some speed. Like, we have groupies now. And there are these three girls who never miss a show. And they always wait outside the door to meet me. They tell me I'm so beautiful, they love my look, think my drumming is amazing. They gush over me, and if I take the time to take a picture or snapchat with them, they freak out. And, yeah, I like to make fan's happy, and it's totally flattering. I love that we're inspiring people." But there's a softness in her eyes, "...But they don't actually know me. They know what they see. And when I look at these girls, I can see all of the things they would hate about me if they knew me for real once they would come to learn that I wasn't just that cute girl in the band- if I was just me."

Riley is completely captured by her words, so much that she needs to remind herself to breathe.

"They'd hate that sometimes I just want to wear pajamas all day and watch The Walking Dead all day and make no effort in my appearance. Or that sometimes I want to run around in the mountains with my friends in their van because the trees are so big we argue that giants are real and obviously they planted them from their houses in the clouds. I'm a big nerd with weird thoughts and I'm not just some punk rock, bad girl romance." But after such a passionate discussion, she'll lock eyes with Riley, the words are genuine, "And you love every part of me. You've seen the good and the bad. So in a way, this tattoo represents something even bigger. That you took the time to look at my wings to the point where even you introduced me to the parts of me that I didn't even know where there because I was too busy trying to fit this idea of me people have. The idea my fans have, the idea Jensen has. You've shown me that...every part of me- good or bad? It's beautiful. Bats look tough and creepy on the outside, but that isn't always the case. Think I relate to that a little."

'...I am so in love with this girl.'

"...That's really beautiful, Carissa. And I think that's perfect for you." She can't help it, she has to kiss her. Slow and gentle.

But it's enough to make that supposed little punk turn pink in the face before she'll pull back with a smile, "Okay, so what's yours? And I swear I don't expect some long, sappy explanation like mine."

"Well, unfortunately it's not as detailed as yours." She'll laugh a little, "But it does have meaning. A lot of meaning actually." And she thinks back to her middle school days, to all of those times she would sing those lyrics at the top of her lungs, or when she first met Amy. Before that wonderfully courageous girl took a turn for the worse, when they got better together. There's one interest in Riley's life that has always been consistent, it continues to be. And that one special quote is one of the most important life lesson's she ever learned. Her favorite movie, her favorite musical, her favorite quote that she connects to so deep after every single hardship, "My right wrist, above the scars, old and new. Written straight across my forearm, not too big, but not too small: No Day But Today."

But that look on Carissa's face- it's filled with so much love and so much emotion. The grin is from ear to ear, "...That's absolutely perfect for you, Riley. Especially where you're gonna' put it." But there she goes again, stealing Riley's hat right off of her head and pushing her fingers through that medium blonde, short mess hair, "Yours is probably gonna' be done way before mine, you're gonna' stay til' mine's finished, right?"

"Nope. I'm leaving without you, walk home since I drove"

"Asshole."

"Gimmie' my hat back."

Cut off by a man who looks to be in his mid twenties with stretched ears and covered in tattoos up and down his skinny arms, "You girls ready?"

"Yeah." In unison.

"Okay, we've got you both set up on the two back desks so you can be next to each other."

Carissa is already sliding out of her leather jacket with ease, folding it over her now bare arm. Clad in a white thick strapped tank top, "Let's do this, Riley." A determined tone of voice.

But it won't stop Riley from admiring those arms...those perfectly toned shoulders as she slips out of her leather jacket (with the fabric sleeves, slightly more grunge than punk in comparison to Carissa's jacket), clad in a black Tegan and Sara - Monday, Monday, Monday, t-shirt, "Right behind you." It's a confident tone, with just a hint of timidness.

"You know, since we were talking about Jensen before." Disgust is already preparing Riley's nerves for her first inked experience along with Fear, "Is she going to go to jail for the video?"

"She's also a minor, so last I heard, she'll potentially serve a month over the summer, but that's it." At least Fear is neurotic enough to pry, nobody else bothered to look into what might happen with Jensen.

"That fucking sucks."

"It does, but it's something."

"But why are they waiting?"

"Because her court date isn't until after graduation, they paid up the nose so she could still do that. Her parents, that is."

The conversation will come to a close when Sadness manages to get their attention, "Guys, get ready, the artist is done setting up."

Fear tenses in his seat, "I'm so nervous! I hope it doesn't hurt- oh god, here we go!"

Though her nerves are completely on edge in the beginning, she comes to a rather relieving realization that the pain isn't completely unbearable. If nothing else, it feels like a sunburn, irritating, but not too bad. She's leaning back against her chair, while Carissa who is adjacent to her is sitting the opposite way, her front facing the back of the chair, her legs stretched out on either side, "So Carl roped me into being in his skit for the senior variety show."

"Are you serious?" She's already smiling at the thought of Carissa being forced to do anything like that with Carl, "What's his skit about?"

"It's about how he farts in class and everyone laughs, but then he gives some speech about how he's not ashamed."

"...And is your role, what, laughing student number three?" She's merely teasing of course.

The conversation thankfully not being drowned out by the buzzing sound of the needles working at the two girl's skin, but it's a weirdly relaxing sound, "I'm playing a girl in a wheelchair who apparently has never been able to walk because she has a rare disease where she ate alien flesh which left her paralyzed from the waist down and after he gives that speech I'm able to walk and it's a miracle, and while that happens A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton plays."

"...Is Carl okay?"

Now Carissa is almost in tears she's laughing so hard, "I'm not even kidding you, that's exactly what I said when he described this idiotic skit with me. But let's be real, of fucking course that's that Carl is doing for the variety show."

"Guess your band isn't playing?"

"Nah, especially since it's only for our school and John and Crystal don't go there. Crystal's already out of high school anyway."

"Well I'm so sorry your talents are being reduced to girl in a wheelchair with rare made up disease who's paralyzed."

The remainder if the session is filled with minimal talking. Instead, Riley and Carissa reach out to take each others hands, and never look away from each other for even one second.

They've been driving around for at least an hour. They hadn't been ready to go home just yet. After all, this is a date for them! So the two girls opt to keep the night alive. Together. They go for a drive, and they inevitably end up in one of their favorite spots. A large cliffs-edge, hidden within the woods. The sun is setting, and the view is breathtaking, it's cast along the trees, and the array of colors in the sky makes Riley want to cry. Beautiful purples and pinks with the tiniest bit of yellow. But that's just it. The emotions are so big right now. She's re-living it all. The good and the bad.

"You make a habit of not paying attention in class, little miss?" "G-guess I'm just tired after the break h-heh. You know?" "I feel you…but if you keep staring, I think I'll have to tell the teacher." - "Hey. You don't have to tell me, it ain't my business and I won't let this talk go past us. Shouldn't have asked a question like that and expected you to answer." The tears well in Riley's eyes and still she can't say a thing. But she's well on the verge of hysterics. Instead he tries a different approach, he doesn't want her to cry. So he gives her a smirk, "Saw her lookin' at you too. You bagged a good one Riley, good for you!" - "Listen, I used to be the exact same way until I just came to a realization. And once I came to it, I couldn't believe how simple the solution was…it was right under my nose the whole time." "Is the whole those people aren't your friends and you're better than them thing? Because if it is, I get that, and it didn't really change how much harder it made it to come to terms with things." "Nope. But trust me, once you realize, it'll be a piece of cake for you." "What is it?" "Your sexuality? It don't define you, Riley." - Jensen, with a very bitter smile, "Carissa invited me." - Finally, Riley will turn to face that girl, "Shut the fuck up. I don't wanna' hear it, Carissa. I don't wanna hear bullshit. Don't call me. Don't text me." "Babe please-h!" "I don't wanna' hear it." - "Baby, please." Those hands, yet again pressing to those cheeks in order to soothe her, "You need to calm down, you'll make yourself sick." "I-Ih'm trying-h-h!" "I know, I know. But come on, take a deep breath with me. On the count of three okay? One, two, three." - "Hey, Riley..?" "…Yeah?" "Just…" Carissa has to look away. If she looks into Riley's eyes, she may lose the courage, "…It's." "Yeah?" Her heart is pounding. This is unbearable. "…I love you." She can't help the big smile gracing her face. And maybe her eyes are even a little glossy. This is too much! She nods, places yet another kiss to her lover's soft lips, "I love you too, Carissa." So quickly she'll about face, head down the steps and down the street. Riley won't look back.

She is crying. Silent tears. And she does her best to subtly wipe them. Yes, Riley's eyes are on that beautiful view with overwhelming thoughts. But Carissa's eyes, they're fixated on that emotional girl. Watching those tears filled with the heaviest feelings in the world. Carissa's eyes, however, are filled with a mix of sorrow and happiness all in one. She reaches for that hand, lacing their fingers together, "Don't cry, Riley."

She turns to her lover, biting her lower lip. The eyes blink slowly, the head shakes, matching that pace, "I've just...I'm thinking."

"...What about?"

She'll look back out to the small valley, the beauty of nature with that gorgeous sunset cast over it, "Everything." She laughs lightly, "The day we met...our first kiss. And all those stupid times I took a razor to my wrist. The way I've wasted so much time caring about what others think...that time Carl-h-" She has to cut herself off, she's on the verge of tears again, "Th-that time Carl-h took me to see-h Modern Baseball-h and then we all spent the night at his house like family-h- and-h- I'm gonna' miss everybody when we graduate just-"

Carissa grabs hold of both of Riley's arms, offering the most genuine grin she possibly can, "No matter where everybody goes once we graduate, we are never gonna' lose each other."

It's enough to silence Riley, though the tears continue to fall.

And maybe even Carissa's eyes are a little glossy, "Because that's just it-h...exactly what you said. We...are family. All of us are. And we're never going to lose touch, no matter where life takes us all. We. Are. Family."

"A-after every fucked up thing I've been through and every fucked up thing you guys have gone through I just-h- I'm so scared I won't be able to go a single day without you guys in my life."

"You will, Riley." And those hands slide up, press to those tear stained cheeks lovingly, "Because you're never going to be alone ever. And all of us are a call away, a text away. No matter where any of us go in the world, we're going to be there for each other. And if I'm lucky, my future is gonna' be you. Me and you together. Because I am so fucking in love with you and I always will be. I know it...I love you."

"...God, I love you too."

And the feeling is so strong, so intense that the two wrap their arms around one another. They hold on for dear life, refusing to be the first to let go. That embrace will get one final seal with parted lips and the deepest breath in a passionate, heart-stopping kiss.

(if the song is still playing you can stop it!)

"Okay, remind me again why I'm the one going dress shopping with you for prom during our lunch break?" Carl is by no means, a boy who enjoys shopping. But right now, Riley doesn't care. She's frittering away, flicking through clothing wracks and examining different dresses, "Aren't couples supposed to match at prom? You haven't even asked her yet."

"I already know she's gonna' say yes. And we're an unconventional couple, I don't expect her to match at all- just to be herself. So I want to get this out of the way. Everybody else is already buying their dresses. I don't want to wait until the last minute."

"Okay, great." The sarcasm is too prominent, "But that still hasn't answered my first question: why am I the one here with you? Shouldn't, like, this be Amanda's job?"

"I invited you because I'm worried it'd be weird with Amanda."

"Because of the whole she's into you thing?" Okay, so at least now it's making sense.

"Yeah, and I didn't want weird vibes while doing this. Besides, you know how she is. If she came, we wouldn't be standing in a thrift store right now, we'd be in some high end place where all of the dresses are extremely out of my taste. Besides she's a little more glam and...I'm a little more grunge."

So he'll push his boyish demeanor aside, slowly walking behind her, "Okay, well, tell me what you're looking for. I'll try to help." He's already flicking through the dresses in the adjacent wrack, "What colors don't you want?"

"Definitely not pink." She's eyeing a navy dress, it's cute, but she's not in love with it. It surely isn't the one...but maybe she could try it on? It's strapless and very simple, "I don't want to dress to be too loud, either. But something that still is kind of unique. You know me well enough. Oh, and I'd rather it wasn't a gown. I don't want a dress that reaches the floor, I'll just end up tripping on it."

"Are we against polka dot? And more specifically gold polka dots?"

"Hm?" She immediately turns. And in his hand and extended toward her is a black dress with golden polka dots of different sizes strewn about, vintage style. Almost resembling something of a 50′s style dress, but with a modern sort of twist. It's got spaghetti straps and falls right at the waist- an a-line shape with a very subtle built in petticoat so it fans out just enough, but not too much. The dress zips in the back and would likely reach just below her knees. Her jaw drops, "...That's the dress."

"Well, hurry up, Riley!" He's nearly shoving it into her hands, "Go try it on, make sure it fits."

"Okay, okay- but be honest when I come out, okay? If it doesn't look good, tell me."

"I will, I will! Now go try it on." Just as she's closing the dressing room curtain, he'll find himself now looking through a wrack of old sweaters, "So you preforming today at the senior variety show?"

"Yeah, that's when I'm gonna ask her. Gonna' play a song for her, then ask."

The smile is clear in his voice, "Jensen's gonna' freak."

"It's an added bonus." It's been a long time since anybody has seen her in a dress. So she'll take a deep breath, "Now don't you dare laugh, I'll kick your ass...I'm coming out." The curtain is pulled back slowly and there she stands in the dress that to her luck, fits perfectly.

Even Carl has to do a double take, "Holy Shit, Riley."

She'll cover her face, "Is that good or bad?"

"That is a bitchin' dress."

"Did you just say bitchin'?"

"Yeah, I'm bringing it back." But he'll digress, "But seriously, Riley, you look fuckin' gorgeous." Are their tears in his eyes? A breath is taken, "I mean you just- you really-"

"...Are you crying?"

He'll hide his face with his arm, "Yeah...I-I'm sorry I'm makin' it awkward. But it's like, a big deal, kind of, you know? You've come so far and now I'm seeing my best friend of five and a half years who's been to hell and back with everything she's gone through looking gorgeous and honestly really grown up and it's just- you have to get that dress."

Their eyes lock and she'll grin wide, pushing her hair back nervously. Maybe Carl flustered her. Because it's not very often at all that in she's complimented in such a way. And a platonic compliment is just as lovely as a romantic one. So the silence will be broken, "...Don't really like heels. Would it be totally ridiculous to wear my black docs?"

Carl will be true blue honest, "...Nobody will be looking at your feet."

That's enough for her to giggle, "...Docs it is."

"Come on, get dressed. We gotta' pay for this and get back to class so we aren't late for the Variety Show pre practice before eighth period. You can leave it in my car so she doesn't see it."

It's no surprise to any teacher that none of the seniors pay attention in any of their classes leading up to the senior variety show. Obviously they're anxious to get to the all too familiar tradition. It's filled with musical acts, monologues and of course...comedic skits. But a bemused Carissa with maybe just the smallest smile groans as she takes her seat after what she considered to be the most ridiculous performance she's ever been a part of. But maybe there's a small part of her that's proud of Carl. After all, his skit had the audience nearly in tears they'd been laughing so hard, "I can't believe they let you get away with that shit when everyone's fighting for everything to be so politically correct these days."

Carl, completely missing the point as the next act is currently preforming on stage (the cynical, depressive comedy stylings of Jordan), "You think somebody got offended by farting?"

Carissa actually has to rub her forehead in utter shame, "I meant the me in a wheelchair thing."

"Well, of anyone's upset I'll apologize, but I meant no harm- and the disease I gave you planted by aliens wasn't real so."

"And what'd you call that made up disease again?"

"I can't walk syndrome."

"...Goin' real far in life ain't you, Carl?" She'll shake her head. Carl is certainly lucky she loves him like a brother, "Now shut up, Riley's up next."

"Afraid you might cum in your seat when she starts singing?"

That earns him a direct punch to the chest.

"Ow!" Doubled over for just a second.

"Oh, I barely touched you, don't be such a baby."

The emcee is quick to reach for the microphone, "And next up is Riley Andersen, on guitar playing the song 21 Guns, by Green Day."

It's enough for Carissa to tense in her seat, "Ohmygod, that's my favorite Green Day song."

"Yeah, I know."

"Shut up!" Immediately she brings her hand to her mouth, nervously biting her nails. And it takes everything for Carl not to spill the beans. Carissa has no idea what's coming, but he does.

And just behind them, a bitter voice utters, "I hope she fucks it up." Jensen.

All the while, Riley is taking her seat on the metal stool, adjusting the mic and testing out her guitar one final time to be safe.

'Okay, guys, let's do this! We've been practicing for ages, we've got this!'

She'll clear her throat, "This is, um...actually my girlfriend's favorite Green Day song."

A few shouts of encouragement come from different area's of the audience. Arrays of wooh!, go Riley!, wife goals!, we love you Riley!

And so she'll giggle nervously, adjusting her beanie, "She actually has a rule in the car that...if this song comes on we're not allowed to skip it. And sometimes I try to skip past it super fast to see if she'll notice. She always does." That earns a mutual chuckle from the crowd, "Anyway, um...this is 21 Guns, by Green Day."

'Awkward the announcer already said that.'

'Who cares already, let's just do it!'

A brief pause before she's ready to go. The first chords strummed with ease, "Do ya' know what's worth fighting for? When it's not worth dyin' for? Does it take your breath away? And you feel yourself suffocating?"

Carissa is on the edge of her seat. The well and true human personification of heart eyes. Her hands are brought to her chest, clasped together. She might just be falling in love all over again. For the umpteenth time.

And she will lightly tap her guitar eight times before continuing into the chorus, "One, twenty one guns, lay down your arms, give up the fight."

Carl is grinning at his best friend. Rubbing her back gently, "She's pretty good."

There's no hesitation from Carissa, "She has the most beautiful alternative voice I've heard in my life." And not even for one moment will her eyes avert away from Riley.

Who's eyes had been closed this entire time. Completely lost in the song. The passion is clear, "You're in ruins..." Until she dares to open them, and seeks Carissa out immediately, locking their eyes together, "One, twenty one guns, lay down your arms, give up the fight."

And there's Carissa, daring to sing with her, "One, twenty one guns, throw up your arms, into the sky...you and I."

The song continues without a hitch. And for an acoustic cover, and her very first one, Riley is damn proud. And if the loud applause upon her finish isn't enough. She is absolutely buzzing. With the biggest grin, she'll keep her eyes on Carissa, just after giving a nod to the back stage crew.

And immediately, they put the stage spotlight on Carissa who proceeds to look around in confusion, while Carl is laughing because he knows exactly what's about to happen...

Riley takes a breath, "Carissa, do you wanna' go to prom with me?"

That's enough to cause a standing ovation. Everyone in that room is nearly screaming. Carissa hides her face only momentarily before she's making her way out of the aisle and running up onto the stage. Two can play at that game. The microphone is taken from her girlfriend. She'll announce it for the whole room to hear, "Riley, I'm pretty sure that there is nobody in this entire universe that I would rather go to prom with than you." And since the cheering refuses to die down, she'll continue speaking, "It's a yes from me."

Every single member of the senior class is both touched and off the wall, buzzing with the excitement if just being proud to be seniors, happy for their infamous school couple.

All but one. Jensen. Jensen never stands even once. The seething rage of jealousy is building inside of her. It never ceases, even during the remaining acts. The ninth period bell rings and the auditorium of pumped up teens piles out to enjoy their Friday night, until she's the only one left. It's at least forty five minutes before she'll finally stand, because the trigger has been pulled and she reaches for a pen and paper from her purse. Angry hands working at it, jotting down names.

Riley
Carissa
Carl
Amanda
Jordan

One, 21 Guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 Guns
Throw up your arms into the sky
You and I