Loki was feeling rather foolish the following morning. He'd slept like a stone, without any dreams he could recall, and that helped his strength return to normal. He bathed and used the hotel-provided toothbrush, remembering his promise to Laura about cleaning his teeth. After, he formed new clothes, black jeans and plain black T-shirt, and headed for the door. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror above the dresser and stopped.

He'd picked the clothes without much thought, but now he looked at them and knew: he was in disguise. He was hiding. But why should he? If Steve had been found out, Loki would be next. Why pretend to be what he was not? He didn't need his battle armor, but he could wear something that looked less like a university student and more like who he was.

He changed the shirt to button-front, long-sleeved silk in Arendelle teal with violet buttons. Smoothing his hair back, he looked at himself and nodded approval. Better. The pack would only attack the weak, not the strong. He'd shown too much weakness, and it was time to get over it.

He texted both Natasha and Steve that he was awake, presuming they had both risen since the hour was late enough, and hurried to the breakfast room before they took all the food away.

Loki was helping himself to another bagel (stale and with indifferent spread) when Natasha entered. She was wearing slim-fitting jeans and her loose black jacket over her white top, which meant she probably had a weapon at the back of her waist again. Her hair was loose on her shoulders, and there was just enough gloss on her lips to draw his gaze.

They'd kissed. The memory of that made him want to touch his own lips. Reality asserted itself and he wondered – had he really been that pathetically needy? Norns, no wonder she'd turned him down. Still he forced a smile at her and beckoned her to join him. "Good morning."

"Good morning. How are you feeling?" She didn't sit down, standing on the other side of the table as if she didn't expect to be staying.

"Rested. Ready for whatever the plan is for today. To see James and Margaret, I assume?"

"If you want, later, sure," she said. "But we have an appointment to visit Agent Coulson. He wants your advice on something."

That was curious, but Loki passed over it to ask, "Where's Steven?"

"He had an appointment at the Pentagon. They heard they'll have to cough up seventy years of backpay and are already trying to weasel out of it." She leaned on the back of the chair in front of her, seeming relaxed and amused.

"Coulson didn't want to go with him?" Loki asked, finding that dubious. Coulson didn't have an Ice Demon toaster, after all.

"Not when Nick's going himself. Maria said he wasn't pleased this was out in the open so quickly – that nurse's photo was picked up on some of the gossip websites. It's still only rumor, and they haven't connected you, yet, but…." she shrugged, and he grimaced, not surprised.

"What does Coulson want my advice on?"

"I assume he wants to ask you about things before Rogers' time." She teased, "He's old but not ancient."

Loki was tempted to stick out his tongue at her like Lila did, but restrained himself to wrinkling his nose at her. "Hilarious." He drained his orange juice and stood. "Fine. We should go then?"

Away from the breakfast room, he said to Natasha, "I hope I did nothing unacceptable last night? I was not myself."

"I think you were," she disagreed. He grimaced at that second-hand rejection and what it told him of his behavior, which he barely remembered, except he knew he'd pulled her down, she'd kissed him, and when she'd touched him, he'd flinched so hard he'd nearly dumped her on the floor.

She glanced his way as they walked. "You know I meant it, right? 'Not now' doesn't mean never; it means not now."

"Sometimes it means never," he corrected, "but I am… pleased to know what you believe it means." He considered what he recalled of the night before and added wryly, "At least my lack of lucidity did not chase you away."

"You were truthful, and that's rare in my business for anyone to be so willing to reveal themselves as you did," she said.

"And an exploitable weakness, surely?" he asked.

"In my enemies," she confirmed. "But if you were my enemy I would've accepted your offer." When he was silent, turning that over in his mind, she asked, "You disapprove?"

"No," he answered and gave a short laugh. "It would be highly hypocritical of me, after all. No, I was pondering that my skills are either so atrophied or yours are so strong that my invitation could be rejected." He said it lightly, though she had been wiser to refuse him. As yesterday had shown so clearly, he wasn't ready.

As they waited for the valet to bring the car from whatever mysterious place they stashed it, she glanced at him. "Arendelle colors? Not very subtle."

He shrugged. "I felt tired of hiding."

"You didn't have it with you. Where did it come from?"

Now this was an entertaining turn in the conversation. He grinned at her. "Magic."

"Useful," she murmured with a nod, as if she were completely accustomed to the idea that he could pull clothes out of nothingness. He did not believe it.

He folded his arms and accused, "You're pretending to be unimpressed."

"Am I?" she returned blandly, with not a twitch to prove otherwise.

Narrowing his eyes at her, he declared, "I see l have to make a more impressive effort to demonstrate my skills, next time."

"You're not the only one with skills. Maybe I'll demonstrate some of mine," she retorted.

"Oh, I hope so."

They were smiling at each other as the valet brought the car around.

Natasha glanced at Lukas as she drove toward the Triskelion for their meeting with Coulson. He seemed better today, flirting with her easily, but yesterday's panic attack still disturbed her. The surface was intact, but underneath seemed, if not broken, at least deeply cracked.

With luck Maria would have some information on help for Lukas. Natasha could break him easily enough, but putting someone back together was not something they'd taught in the Red Room.

"There," she pointed, lifting one finger off the wheel to point at the high building across the river. "The Triskelion, administrative HQ for SHIELD."

It was pretty impressive, she always thought, modern glass and steel, as if it was rising out of the river, and nothing like the short buildings around it. And for her, it meant something approaching 'home', since that was where Natasha Romanoff had been born.

As they approached the bridge, Loki grabbed the steering wheel abruptly and sent the car onto the shoulder. She stomped the brake pedal in reflex, arms up to protect her face against the windshield breaking. Car horns blared all around them, and she braced for something to hit them.

"What are you-? Lukas, what was that?" she demanded after the car had shuddered to a halt. "My god, in traffic, we could've been hit!"

He sat, arms folded, and did not look at her. "I won't go there," he declared, and jerked his chin in the direction of the Triskelion looming on the other bank of the river.

She took a beat to tamp down her reflexive impatience, and said, "It's a meeting. Nothing's going to happen."

"No."

"You went in the SHIELD building in New York. Why is this different?"

"Because it is," he insisted, voice tightening. She thought it had little to do with the building, and more to do with having seen Carter and Barnes and the resurgence of old memories. His explanation had nothing to do with that, though, when he said, "When I look on the shadowpath, all I see are dark echoes, Natalya. Terrible things have happened inside that building, on its grounds."

She frowned. "Nothing like that happened here, Lukas. Director Carter built it, or at least the previous version of the building. This one's only five years old; there aren't any ghosts in it." She smiled a little, trying to get him to relax, but he refused.

"No. Tell Agent Coulson I will meet with him, but not in that building."

That sounded non-negotiable. If this were nothing more than exerting some control over SHIELD, rather than feeling summoned, he had a right to do that, and especially if he felt the building was malevolent, there was nothing to be gained by trying to talk him into it. She took her phone out. "Where do you want to meet?"

"I don't care."

But he did, that much she knew. Nowhere dark or underground or heavy security to make him fear an ambush. "All right. I'll call him. We'll go back to the hotel and we can meet with him somewhere else."

"Thank you," he said with distant politeness.

She texted Coulson that Lukas was refusing to enter the Triskelion and they would have to meet somewhere else. Lukas only spoke again when they'd looped around and were heading back to the hotel.

"I do not know who you offended at SHIELD or what crime you committed to be forced to tend to me, but I do appreciate it," he murmured, breaking the silence.

"My choice," she reassured him, and touched his knee lightly. "Phil and the rest understand you have some understandable problems trusting the rest of SHIELD."

"And I would let no one else keep watch on me," he observed. "So they don't recall you to something else."

"Also true," she admitted, and pulled into the short driveway for the valet to take the car back. "C'mon, let's go to the bar and wait for Phil's answer."

The hotel bar was in the process of switching from coffee to alcohol, so she was not surprised when Loki ordered whiskey and sat at the corner table in the bar area. The furniture was that curious blend of plush and not proportioned properly, so the seats were too low and narrow for Lukas' long legs so he looked like he was sitting in a child's chair. He didn't seem to notice, however. She ordered an iced tea and said, "You can take it up to your room if you want. I'll call you."

His eyes flicked in the direction of the elevators as if he were considering it, but he shook his head. "No, here is fine." He gulped half his drink and set the glass on the table so he wouldn't finish it, and inhaled a deep breath, spreading large hands across his thighs. "I do wish this would ease."

Glad that he was admitting the problem, she told him, "It will. Give yourself some time."

"You counsel patience, and I know you are right, but-" he grimaced and shook his head. "Not a strength of mine."

"And?" she probed.

"And," he echoed, looking everywhere but at her, "I hate it. My- the place I grew up prized strength above all things and despised weakness. To find such weakness in myself-" he glanced at the mirror hanging over the bar, "I wonder if they were right about me, after all. That sorcery and tricks are the weapons of the weak and unworthy."

It wasn't hard for her to parse that one, having met Thor. But centuries' old sibling rivalry was a big nut to crack, so she stayed to what she knew. "I think if any of them had experienced what you have, they would be drooling husks. Because I'll tell you something I learned long ago - the ones who never face adversity but believe themselves strong, are the first to break."

"And when you break anyway?" Loki murmured, head down and hair hanging loose at the side of his face, so that she reached across and smoothed it behind his ear, out of the way.

"You're not broken. Hurt, but you're here, you made it," she reminded him. "Sometimes surviving is a victory, Lukas. Sometimes making it through with only a piece of your soul is the best you can do."

His gaze met hers, and his hand covered hers, where she'd laid it on his leg. "You have more than a piece, Natalya."

It was ridiculous how that sparked warmth in her chest, that he would recognize that she'd meant it about herself and say that to her. She didn't need reassurance or confirmation, but it felt good to hear anyway.

But she pulled her hand back as her phone buzzed with a text. "Coulson's coming here. He's not far."

Lukas sat up, and there was nothing to read in his expression, the upset smoothed away.

Loki knew from the way Natasha tensed when she glanced toward the front of the lobby as the outer doors opened, that Coulson had come. They both stood to wave him over to the lounge. "Agent Coulson, thank you for meeting here," Loki said and gestured Coulson to the opposite stuffed chair in lieu of shaking hands.

"No problem," Coulson answered, with just enough edge to let them know it had been a problem but he was accommodating it. Natasha flicked her eyes at him that she noticed, too.

"You did not wish Steve a part of this," Loki said, as an opener, to see what Coulson would say. That had made him suspicious that they wanted only Loki for something, but were keeping Steve away. "Why?"

Coulson's surprise looked genuine. "Oh, I figured he'd have no interest in what I wanted to talk to you about." He set his briefcase on the table and opened it with his thumb on the lock. "SHIELD's picked up some artifacts we can't identify; sometimes we can't even figure out what they do. We're hoping you know something about them."

Loki relaxed and spread his hands. "I would be happy to offer whatever assistance I may. Did you bring these items here?"

Coulson gave a short laugh. "No, no, just pictures for now. They're secure in a lab." He made a small grimace. "I didn't think you would want to visit in person."

Just the words "secure" and "lab" made his heart thud too heavily in his chest, and Loki forced a smile. "Not especially. So, photographs?"

He removed a file folder from his satchel and pulled out a stack of photos, handing the top one over to Loki. "This cylinder was found in an old burial site in China. They used to think it was obsidian but we know now it's some sort of carbon-polymer, far too advanced for Earth five hundred years ago, obviously. If touched, it hums, but R&D suspects the power source is failing so it might have done more, at one time."

He handed the picture to Loki, who looked at it and chuckled. "Oh, mortals, never stop being so amusing."

"You know what it is? Where it's from?" Coulson asked eagerly.

"The markings here are from a race called the Kree. They are quite powerful. Asgard forbids their presence on Midgard, although this may not have come from one of them directly. Because many races can use this." He tossed the photo back at Coulson, with a smirk. "It is a device for use between partners during sex acts."

Coulson looked at the photo and his eyes went wide, as the purpose of the dark shiny cylindrical object with the tapered ends suddenly became obvious. "Oh my God, it's a vibrator?" he blurted.

Natasha burst into laughter at his tone that only grew when Coulson tried to glower at her to stop.

"Is that what you call them?" Loki asked, with deliberate innocent curiosity, teasing him. "To be more specific, I believe that one is for insertion in both-"

"I get it!" Coulson cut him off. "Good to know. I guess. That's going to be a fun report. Maybe I'll just bury it in the lab again."

"Oh no, you should use it," Loki suggested. "Though if the power supply is weakening it might not be quite as pleasurable." Coulson shaded pink, while Natasha laughed. Loki wasn't sure which reaction was more delightful.

Coulson cleared his throat. "Moving on. Hopefully not also a sex toy." He handed the next one to Loki.

Loki was disappointed when he didn't recognize the mouse-sized golden pyramid, etched with a geometric but unfamiliar pattern. "The temptation to tell you a story is nearly overwhelming, but no, I have no idea what it is or where it comes from. I would need a closer look."

"Okay. Next."

They went through three more – one unknown, the second was a Nova Empire holographic communications device broken in half, and the third was a Kree riitual blade which was making Loki suspicious that the Kree had been to Midgard more often than an interdicted world should have been. But the next photograph was a punch to the chest. Sitting on a white plastic tray, next to a baseball for size, there was a metallic ball. Part of the metal shielding had been cut and bent to expose a glowing core. He stared at it, not breathing, memories of a baby cooing at the sight of it floating, attacking him with their sharp little knives.

His voice was ragged. "That's mine. I want it back."

"It's yours?" Coulson asked. "We knew it was alien technology when it was recovered by the SSR in '52, but not that it was yours. It was with some Latverians who got it from Hydra."

Loki blinked and shoved the pain away, to get control of himself. Anger rose up in place of the pain, disliking the sense that he was being played. He leaned back, feigning ease, but did not disguise the hostile sharpness of the gaze. "Oh come, Coulson, you must have had some idea. Or why ask me?"

Coulson read the warning and grimaced a bit before admitting, "Well, given the Hydra connection there was a suspicion that you might know about it, and I wanted to confirm that. What does it do?"

"It hovers, spins, and flashes lights for a child's amusement."

"It's a toy?" Coulson exclaimed, but Natasha leaned near to put her hand on Loki's arm, giving him an inquiring look that he was all right.

That gave him the strength to take a breath and explain, "My brother gave it to a princess of Arendelle, as a gift. Schmidt stole it, and I want it back."

Coulson hesitated, thinking it through, then nodded agreement. "Of course, we can do that. It's not here; it's in our experimental science facility. Agent Barton is headed there for another assignment, so I'll give him orders to bring it back with him when he's done." He raised his eyebrows at Loki. "If that's acceptable?"

"That seems fine. Just so long it is not conveniently 'forgotten' to return to me," Loki warned. "My book was destroyed by your people, so I want the ball."

He didn't know what he would do with it. He shouldn't return it to Arendelle – now that it was a known alien artifact and power source, it would only be stolen again – but he knew he didn't want it in SHIELD hands.

"I won't let them forget," Coulson promised and shoved the file folder back in his case. "That's all for now."

"That's all?" Loki repeated, finding that absurd. "You come all the way here for that?"

"I had intended to give you a tour of the Triskelion," Coulson answered drily. "I'd like to show you the truth about what we do and who we are. I think you'd like it. But I know those traitors broke your trust, and it'll take time. I hope you'll give us – me – a chance earn it back."

Loki joined him, standing, and shook his hand. He kept hold of Coulson's hand, and met his gaze so he would understood that Loki meant his words. "I am giving you a chance, Agent Coulson. Otherwise I would burn SHIELD to the ground with everyone inside. Do not mistake mercy for a weakness of will."

He could see the instinct in Coulson to rise to the challenge, but fortunately he swallowed back confrontational words, and merely nodded once. "I understand. Mister Onsdag, I'll be in touch. Agent Romanoff, your requested package will be delivered soon. Good luck."

He walked away, and Loki lifted a brow at Natasha. "Package?"

"Something I think you'll like," she teased. "It's a surprise."

"I'm not sure I like surprises," he muttered, but returned to his seat to sniff at the pleasant aroma of the whiskey and decided she was not going to get away with all the secrets. "Tell me, is the facility where they're keeping the ball, also where the tesseract is?"

She didn't flinch – she was good – but Loki didn't need a reaction or a response to confirm anything. After a moment considering a denial, she grimaced and gave in to the inevitable. Her gaze met his. "How the hell do you know?" she asked curiously. "I never talked about it. You couldn't have overheard anything that gave it away. So, how?"

He smirked. "When you found out who I am, no one asked me to pinpoint where the plane went down. That told me it had been found. If they found the plane, the tesseract fell not that distant. SHIELD has the technology to detect the Bifrost, so they should be able to locate the unshielded tesseract as well."

"Ah," she said and smiled in appreciation. "Well played."

"High praise from you." He drained the whiskey and set the glass back on the table. "Shall we find Steven? Perhaps we can all visit a museum. I enjoy ridiculing everything they say about the 1700s."

"Let me text him and see where he is," she said, taking out her phone. The answer was prompt and her eyebrows shot up in surprise. "He says he's on his way back; we should wait."

Steve walked into the lobby as Loki was pondering another drink and shifted his wave at the bartender to waving for Steve's attention.

"You look rested," Steve greeted.

"You look as if you were fighting bureaucrats all morning," Loki returned, and was rewarded for his easy guess by a heartfelt groan as Steve dropped into the other seat.

"Oh God, at first they didn't believe me, of course, even though Fury was with me. And then they did believe me and that was worse, since they paraded me around to all the generals. I'm back to being a performing monkey," he finished in digust. "You were right, nothing changes. Not really."

Loki held back the verbal "I told you so" but couldn't help a smirk at this validation.

"What are they going to do with your status?" Natasha asked.

"You think they're going to make that decision in one day? C'mon." Steve scoffed. "It was so annoying I left. I have better things to do with my time."

"Like lunch?" Loki suggested. The other two agreed with his suggestion, but as they decided to go to the grill down the street, Natasha checked her phone, as if looking for an update on her mysterious package. What surprise could she possibly have that he would like? What did she have planned, evidently with SHIELD collusion?

Wondering about the surprise was a little bit thrilling, and he decided to enjoy the anticipation and not badger her for the answer just yet.

tbc..