heartbreakers

a not-so-happy reunion

"Gabby?" Severide had to look twice before finally recognising the woman in front of him.

"Yeah…it's me." She sighed weakly and a slight smile spread across her face, nervously darting her eyes at everyone else. No unique faces, they were all in a state of pure shock.

"Dawson….?" He asked, perplexed, his tone turning more irritated, "Or whatever your name is now." He looked down at me, his irises grew dark and I suppressed my smile immediately, breaking the gaze as if there were better reasons to be alive.

"It's legally Rosenfeld, sure. Soon enough it'll be back to Dawson again, though." She retorted. She could hear the annoyance in his voice. She used to like it, when he got all fired-up for her, but now, now it felt more like he was going to kill her or something.

"Oh, so I did hear right. You did get married." He added, the sarcasm in his voice beyond recognisable. He was most definitely not happy at her sudden return to the Firehouse. He prayed that they would have to go out on a call in the middle of their conversation so he could not have to address his still present feelings for her. He wanted to hate her, he wanted to hate her so much for leaving him. But he couldn't.

"Out of impulse. I'm getting divorced." She replied.

Severide sensed the tension between them, changing the subject.

"So…who's that little cutie…?" Severide grinned awkwardly. Matt looked at him as if to say, why are you being friendly with her? Or she broke my heart, or don't you remember?

"She's my…daughter. Isla Eve Rosenfeld." She replied uncomfortably, but proud, glancing at Matt, seeing the disappointment on his face, then glancing back at Isla.

"She's cute. She looks exactly like you." Severide smiled, determined not to let Matt screw this up. He knew that Matt still loved her. He'd been talking about her ever since she left.

It took every ounce of him not to fight back, and ignore it and try and forget everything but his curiosity took over him like a demon. "With your ex-husband… or whatever?" Matt again interjected, exasperated, muttering the last part under his breath. Okay, he thought, he didn't have to pretend to hate her anymore. She moved on and he physically couldn't bare the sight of another woman that wasn't her. She had a child with someone that wasn't him. Did their love mean anything to her? He couldn't tell if she ever loved him, if their relationship was just an elaborate scam for her, and it vexed him beyond his own belief. It irked him to think of the relationship they once had, and the fact that he would not allow himself to have it again.

"Unfortunately." She retorted the humiliation.

Words were indeed racing through his head in a blast of confusion, deciding on what to say next. Time ticked by and her eyes grew dimmer by the second.

"You back for good?" He questioned bluntly.

"My husband is a moron, what do you think?" He debated what she said in a while before saying the one thing that could anger her more.

"Good." He added, his face completely deadpanned.

"Loving the attitude, Matt. Or do I even get to call you that anymore?" She darted her eyes at him, careful not to wake her daughter.

"I couldn't care less. And what do I call you anymore?" He asked, his voice a mix of bewilderment and anger.

"My name. Gabriela, Gabby, Dawson. I don't care what. I never saw myself as married. It was a badly timed impulse decision and soon enough I was trapped in a crumbling relationship and it felt like I was being held in a prison, okay? I don't have to explain myself to you. I thought you'd be the one to have my back. I thought wrong." She continued, "Anyways, I'm not going to be married when I get my stupid, lousy, raging alcoholic of a husband to sign the divorce papers."

"Alcoholic? Wow, you sure make all the right decisions." He scoffed.

"Don't make any of this about you." She retaliated.

"Oh yeah? Why are you even here?" He seethed in response.

"To get my job back." She snapped. She gestured at this whole place, his eyes glowering in recognition.

"It's been two years. Two years! You left and you didn't come back or talk to anyone for two whole years! It's not your job anymore!" He stormed off. His voice collided with it and it seemed so foreign to her, as if silence was all this situation had left and a voice wold be an unexpected twist.

"Well." She regained her posture. "It may not be my job anymore but I still want it back", she breathed out, to keep her tears at bay, and turned to Severide, who was still standing there, "Who replaced me on 61?"

"Mills and… wait. Don't you know?" He scratched his head and rolled his eyes, unsure of how to tell her, and whether to tell her in the first place. She was bound to ask about her.

"Know what, Severide? I'm not in the mood for games." She said, scowling, as her daughter began to wake up and begin crying. She hushed Isla by rocking her gently, while Severide continued.

"Wait…no one told you?" He was genuinely confused as to how the news hadn't got around to her. She didn't see it on the ambulance, either.

"Told me what? Don't play with me." The not-knowing was fuelling her oncoming irritability

"Shay died, Dawson…. 6 months after you left."

"No…no. That's not possible…" She tried to quench her true feelings. Her biggest regret. She never got to tell her goodbye.

"Yeah. You've missed a lot." He turned his eyes so that they met hers, staring deep into them, before darting his eyes back to the apparatus floor.

"I'm going to talk to some of the others then", she sniffled, wiping her eyes, "see what else I've missed out on". She turned to walk away, Isla still in her arms, half asleep, when Severide called her.

"Oh, and Dawson?"

"Yeah?" She choked, turning swiftly, holding Isla stronger in her embrace as Kelly walked closer.

"Give him a chance. He's just in shock that you're back. Your break-up…it messed with his head. He doesn't know why you're here and it scares him. Time. He needs time. He'll come around…eventually." He tried to reason with her…for Matt's sake. Severide wished that Matt would show his true feelings for once in his life; not keep them pent up inside as to not run the risk of exposing them, exposing his love, like he did for her, which backfired for him. After he proposed, it only took 3 months for her to leave.

She didn't seem entirely convinced. He had to convince her that Matt still loved her. He could tell that she still loved him; otherwise, why would she come back here? He groaned loudly and sighed as she began to walk away again, muttering,

"I'll keep a note of that."