Welcome back to the Random Roulette! Got past the feels, and here we are with some more food for the converter!
GreenDeLaBean writes that 12, 5 and 8 go look for the hidden green bean farm in the forest to find a secret military base under it . They find out that 14 got there before them and 14 warns them the delicious Green beans are not beans but snakes after he swiftly flicks one of the "green beans".
And they don't find a military base nor weapons of mass destruction.
After we toss it into the generator, we find that Jesse, Calvin and Aiden are gonna find a secret green-bean farm in the forest. Gill's gonna get there first and warn them about the "green beans" that are in fact snakes!
Apparently, Aiden has somehow come back from the dead... *shrugs like that's the norm*
Minus the birdies, I give you No. 3! Hit it Crisper! But watch out for the green beans! They're snakes! Sneks, I say! SNEEEEEKZZZZ!
Crisper:... you've had too much sugar, haven't you? (hits it) AAAHH! SNEKS! (explodes)
It is 5:30 in the morning. Everyone is asleep except for Jesse who is up to no good. Jesse is sitting on his bed with a flashlight, cackling evilly to himself, singing a repetitive, tuneless song.
Go to green beans and check in the dirt!
Militia! Militia! Weapons of mass destruction!
Tra-la-la! Fa-la-la!
"Jesse! Go to sleep!" Axel calls annoyedly from his bedroom. Jesse makes raspberry noises and gets out of bed before running into Olivia's room. He sees Olivia fast asleep in bed before running up to her. He pulls out a baloon-sword and starts whacking her with considerable force.
"Aaah! Jesse! What's the big idea?!" She shouts annoyedly before sitting up in bed.
"I have to go to the green-bean farm to find the secret military base under it! Weapons of mass destruction, Olivia! Mass destruction!" He shouts crazily. Olivia sends him a cut-eyed glare.
"Who told you about this?" She asks annoyedly. His happiness fades and he looks at her embarrassedly.
"Um... the voices in my head." He tells her bashfully, digging his foot into the floor.
"You know that the voices in your head aren't real, right?" She asks him kindly.
"Well, yeah, but... sometimes their ideas are amazing, Olivia!" He shouts. Groaning, she pulls her cover over her head.
"Ever since the Witherstorm, Jesse's lost his marbles!" She mutters to herself. Jesse promptly leaves before running into Ellegaard's room.
"Ellegaard!" He screams at the top of his lungs. Ellegaard jerks awake.
"Who the- What the- Why the-" She then sees that Jesse is smiling wildly at her. "What?!"
"Where's Calvin?!" He asks.
"... not here..." She replis frustratedly. "Why do you need Calvin?"
"I'm going to take him away with me on a wondrous adventure!" Jesse sings at the top of his lungs.
"... yeah..." Ellegaard goes back to sleep. Jesse walks out of the room and bumps into Aiden whom he stuffs into a burlap sack. After hunting around a bit more, he finds Calvin sneaking around the kitchen and stuffs him into the sack as well. Jesse tosses the two onto a horse and gallops into the rising sun.
About an hour later, he lets Aiden and Calvin out of the burlap sack.
"AAAAHH! CREEPY BLACK DUDE!" Aiden screams before slapping Calvin in the face. The two get into a slapping fight while Jesse sings another one of his annoying songs.
(sing to Soren's 'Farewell' song)
Voices in my head, their ideas are swell.
I'm feeling so fine, but they say I'm not well.
But I tell them all just to go to-
He stops himself.
... But I tell them all just go to smell!
'Cuz I'm alright, and so I say...
Oh! Notchgammit!
"Boo! Boo, you stink!" Aiden randomly yells.
"Shhh! We're here!" Jesse warns them. He gets off of his horse and pulls the two out of the burlap sack. They have found the green-bean farm.
"Ooh! Green-beans!" Calvin yells before grabbing one of them and swallowing it whole.
"You should really chew your food, Calvin." Jesse advises before they hear rustling in the trees. After a few seconds of suspense, Gill emerges from the bushes. Everywhere on his body are pairs of little red ticks on his skin. His skin is pale and he seems sick, as Jesse is quick to point out. "Gill! Everywhere on your body are pairs of little red ticks on your skin! You skin is pale, and you seem sick, as I am quick to point out!" He shouts, suddenly sounding like a Charles Dickens fanatic.
"Don't eat the green beans!" He moans before toppling over. "They're sneks!" He wails before the poison gets the best of him and he dies. Calvin laughs.
"Snakes?! Oh please! These are obviously green-beans! If I just swallowed whole a snake, don't you think I'd-" Calvin suddenly freezes mid-sentence.
"... don't we think you'd what?" Jesse asks annoyedly. Aiden walks up to Calvin and pushes him over. Calvin topples over like a solid statue.
"... oh... they really are snakes..." Jesse states as the "green beans" slither to life, hissing evilly. "Well, at least they didn't- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUGGGHH!" Jesse screams as a snake bites him between the legs.
"Ha! You jinxed yourself!" Aiden laughs before remembering Dumb Ways to Die... namely the point in the game with the hot dog and the perfect mustard. "...-" before he can say another word, a snake latches onto his eyeball. "AHHAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The two boys topple over and are attacked by the delicious green-beans. And no, they do not find the weapons of mass-destruction.
Back at home, everyone wonders of the whereabouts of Jesse, Calvin, Aiden and Gill who are all presumably dead. But before any action is taken, Magnus randomly explodes! The only thing that is left of him are his boots. Nohr gets his boots, and everyone somehow lives happily ever after!... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!
And there you have it, folks! Random Roulette, episode 3! Tune in for next chapter's adventure's episode!... nya! And now you know that Calvin is 5 and Gill is 14!