AN: Thank you so much for being patient with this story!
I really hope this chapter was worth the wait!
Enjoy!
I do not own VicTorious.
In the silence of the apartment a brunette sat alone in her room observing the night sky through her bedroom window. She sat on the window pane with her legs pressed to her chest and was admiring the view of the blanket of snow that had fallen all over the city. It was too cold for Tori to enjoy the view from the fire escape and decided to settle for the company of a warm blanket and a hot cup of cocoa. The apartment she resided in along with the red head was not too far from the floor level. To the women's luck they had the fortune to have both a fire escape and a nice view to the city and by luck of course, they really meant Tori. Since she had been the one to find the apartment and technically called it before Cat had the chance, she managed to have the view and fire escape to herself, though the view from Cat's room wasn't bad at all. She had a nice view to the university and downtown from her room. In the end both women were satisfied with their rooms.
School was finally finished for the semester and the workloads at the station had dropped enough to give the employees a break. Tori found herself with more free time now that she had no meetings to attend or school work to do. Most of the time she found herself catching up on some unfinished readings she'd left aside during school or other times, after Cat had gone to bed she'd find herself talking with the one person she knew she should stay away from, but despite knowing better, it was always inevitable and Jade always resulted being the other person on the end of the phone during most nights.
"I haven't checked the flights yet, dad," the young Vega spoke into her cell phone. There was no reason to whisper, but having the apartment to herself during the day, Tori still found she needed to keep down when she spoke with her parents. She had yet to raise the subject to the red head on her mother's illness. In the back of her mind Tori knew she would have to eventually tell her, but anytime the idea rose, she brushed it aside not wanting to remember why she had to have a talk with the bouncy red head. The last couple of days Tori had only been speaking with her father. Her mother had been too tired from the treatments to speak, and though deep down she was saddened by the results of the treatments, Tori never pressed on the subject.
"I'll check them out as soon as I get the chance, Dad. Say hi to mom for me," she sighed before ending the conversation. She'd lied to her father. Of course she had checked the flights to Marin, California. She'd taken a look at the flights as soon as she'd received the news of her mother's illness. It was a small town and everyone there knew each other. She missed it there. She wanted to go back, right? What Tori couldn't understand herself was why she found herself lying to her father all of a sudden. Wasn't she planning on going down for the holidays?
She was growing exhausted. It felt like there was a great weight over her shoulders that just continued to grow as time progressed and Tori wasn't sure how she could handle it. It wasn't just her mother's illness, it was keeping it from her best friend and being in love with the woman she should keep away from. All of it together felt like it was smothering the brunette. It was probably why she found herself running longer than usual most mornings.
This morning had been different though. She'd woken up early like always, but couldn't find the energy to go for a run. It had been a few weeks since her first kiss with Jade and since then it only seem to grow more constant between the two when they were together alone. They both knew it was wrong to be doing such a thing behind Cat's back. They cared about Cat, they really did, but what was growing between them seemed to be a lot stronger than their feelings for the red head. For weeks Tori had been moping around feeling guilty for deceiving Cat's friendship in such a way but for the first time in weeks Tori didn't feel guilty. She didn't feel bad. She felt content. Tori awoke to the sound of her cellphone signaling a new text message. It had been from Jade. What the message said had worked to make her heart skip and create a great flutter of butterflies in her stomach.
Morning beautiful, hope you have a wonderful day. Maybe we can watch a movie tonight?
-XO Jade
Brown eyes had read and reread the message over and over again. Tori couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so happy for no given reason. Just knowing that the blue eyed woman took the time to send her a simple message gave her a great wave of emotion. Shouldn't she feel guilty? Shouldn't she be upset about it all? They were lying to her best friend for crying out loud.
The sound of the front door startled the brunette. She cleared herself off the window pane and made her way to the living room. The small red headed woman greeted her with a grin as she took off her coat.
"Tori! Great you're here!" she giggled.
Tori nodded hesitantly. If ever Cat was expecting her she knew it was trouble. "I just finished talking to my dad," she replied lifting her hand to show her cellphone.
"Good! I was hoping you could please help me with something," Cat asked with her brown puppy eyes.
"I'm not sure I like that look on your face, Cat," Tori said taking a step back when Cat began to move in her direction.
"Please Tori! It's just a small favor I need you to do for me! I promise it'll be worth it!" She grinned.
Tori rubbed her neck nervously. Whatever Cat had in mind was surely nothing she would enjoy. Deciding there was nothing better to do for the rest of the day she finally gave in and agreed knowing she'd end it up regretting it.
"I hate you, Cat," Tori grumbled. She tugged over her trench coat refusing to meet the red head's proud grin. Cat had explained how one of her co-workers wanted to go out to dinner and Cat being Cat had suggested a double date. When her co-worker revealed she did not have anyone to accompany her Cat told her she'd take care of it and thus resulted the favor Tori had so willingly agreed to. She had to be the blind date.
"Aww come on, Tori! You'll like her. She's a really nice gal! Tall dark and handsome," Cat winked. "Too bad things didn't work out with that James guy, he was cute," she said in mock disappointment.
James. He'd known all along about Jade. He'd known before Tori had and he'd even warned her. Ignoring the slight hint of guilt she felt upon thinking the woman's name, Tori closed her coat around herself and shoved her hands into the pockets. "Let's just get this over with Cat," she grumbled. She couldn't believe she'd actually agreed to this, willingly. She followed behind the giggling red head and shut the apartment door in the process. She silently prayed in her head the night would go by quickly and if possible smoothly.
...
"What are you doing for the holidays, Vega?" Jade asked. She had been staring at her since their arrival at the restaurant and Tori had all but met her gaze in shame.
Tori was on a blind double date with her best friend and her girlfriend, who also happened to be the woman she was secretly seeing. She ignored Jade's question and continued to glare at her cup of water.
"Tori usually goes home for the holidays," Cat answered as she popped another piece of candy into her mouth. They were waiting for Cat's unnamed friend to show up. She said it added a little excitement and mystery to the entire event if Tori didn't know. They'd agreed to meet at the restaurant at seven but so far the mystery date was nowhere to be found. The three women were trying to pass some time by causally sharing their plans for the holidays as they waited.
"Where's home?" Jade raised a brow at the brunette who sat across from her. She was trying her best to draw the woman's attention by cocking her head to the side.
Again Tori refused to meet her gaze. She shrugged and continued to stir the straw and play with the ice in her cup of water. She checked her phone and sighed. The battery was about ready to die.
"Earth to Vega!" Jade waved her hand in front of the brunette.
Brown eyes looked up irritably. Tori was in a foul mood. She was at a restaurant on a Friday night waiting for a date she was forced to go to and sitting across from the one person who she really wanted to be on a date with. She'd been avoiding the woman since she'd discovered she'd be going on the double date with her and the red head. Anger seemed to get the best out of Tori. She knew she shouldn't be upset it, not with Jade at least, but with herself. Jade was Cat's girlfriend and it only made since that she tag along on the double date, but it didn't make matters any easier. It seemed like every time they were together alone they were unable to keep their hands off each other and all Tori really wanted to do was reach across the table and take the dark haired woman in her arms. It was frustrating for Tori. She forced her hands to keep busy and her focus to remain elsewhere. She couldn't stand to sit across from Jade knowing she wasn't really there with her. She was Cat.
"Home is home, Jade," Tori shrugged again and rolled her eyes. Cat ignored her clearly annoyed behavior and continued to eat the bag of skittles she'd brought along. "Excuse me. I need to go to the restroom," Tori said and dismissed herself from the table. She turned too late and caught a glimpse of Cat leaning to kissing Jade. Her heart sank as she dragged herself to the back of the restaurant and to the restrooms. She's not yours, Tori, she reminded herself.
Whoever the mystery woman was, was running more than late and Tori had grown more than impatient sitting around playing the waiting game. She just wanted to get the whole thing done and over with. She turned the sink water on and splashed her face to refresh herself. That always seemed to work. "Get yourself together, Tori," she told herself. There was a tight sensation in her chest as she closed her eyes. It was driving her mad. What was wrong with her? Jade was Cat's girlfriend. She was actually jealous of Cat. Cat!
"Damn it!" she growled gripping the counter to keep herself up and together.
"You're not a happy camper today," someone noted behind her.
Tori turned around startled recognizing the voice. "What do you want Jade?" she sighed meeting amused blue eyes.
Blue eyes softened after a moment as they took in the displeased posture the woman before her had. The taller woman approached the brunette and gently raised her chin to meet her gaze. "Hey," Jade whispered. "I'm sorry okay. I don't mean to give you a hard time. I know this is hard," she said in earnest. Blue eyes searched the brown, trying to let the brunette know she was truly sorry for their current situation.
"Do you? Do you really, Jade? Because this all seems like it's some big joke to you. I hate this. I hate being here. I don't want to be here! And I certainly do not want to be on a date! Not with someone else! I..I just can't…" Tori growled in frustration and stepped back and away from Jade to lean against the sink. "She's my best friend, Jade! You're her girlfriend!" Brown eyes burned with tears. "I...I can't do this...not now, just leave please," she sighed tiredly and turned her back to the raven haired woman.
Jade hesitated unsure of how to respond. Ignoring Tori's words she grabbed the brunette and spun her around to face her. Without giving her a chance she crashed their lips together in a hungry kiss. Tan fingers soon found dark locks as pale hands moved around the small waist. The corner of the sink digging into the brunette's back grew painful but went ignored as the kiss turned almost desperate and full of need. After a while the two finally parted when their breathing became a need once more.
"Tori," Jade whispered with their foreheads pressed together. Her thumb gently stroked below the kiss swollen lips, outlining their shape. Blue eyes waited for brown to open as their owner struggled to regain her breath. "I want you, Tori," she whispered. "You're the one I want. I really am sorry this is such a mess."
Tori found herself unable to speak. She fought back the tears and shook her head as she pushed past Jade. She didn't want to hear those words at the moment. Yes she needed the reassurance the feelings weren't one sided, but it wasn't helping the current situation. She refused to look back knowing if she would not be able to control herself and would only wind up running back to the woman.
As she reached the table she was about ready to let Cat know she was just going to go home, but was cut short upon being met with another person sitting in the seat beside hers. A woman with dark hair that hung just above her shoulders turned to look up at Tori as she stopped a few steps away from the table. Tori was taken aback by the dark brown eyes and the gentle smile the woman offered her.
Cat grinned at both women. She waved Tori over and stood. "Tori, this is Allison," she gestured to the woman who sat silent. She flashed a tooth full grin and stood.
"Allison Mills," the woman said offering her hand.
Tori heard Jade approaching behind her and hesitated to take the friendly woman's hand. "Tori," she finally said taking the hand so as to not appear rude. She caught the slight hint of jealousy written across the blue eye woman's face and lowered her head in discomfort, avoiding once more the azure eyes. She took the seat beside Allison and refused to meet Jade's gaze as Cat began to talk about how she knew Allison and how she and Tori were best friends.
As the dinner progressed Tori tried her hardest to listen to everything the brunette woman was saying, but found her thoughts continued to wonder off. Try as she may, Tori couldn't keep her gaze away from the pale woman's and as soon as blue and brown met, Tori knew it was too late to look away. Jade gave her a small knowing smile and glanced down at her phone. Before Tori could think further, she felt her phone vibrate and checked the new text message.
Upon reading the message she felt the weight of the evening fade away and did her best to be a pleasant partisan for the red head's sake. It couldn't hurt to be nice to the grinning brunette. Tori offered some words in the small conversations, the words of the raven haired woman's message ringing in back of her mind with excitement.
Can't wait to see the movie tonight.
- Jade
P.S You look beautiful tonight.
…
The evening eventually ended when Allison received a call from a second job she'd so happily taken at a law firm as a part-timer. She apologized for having to cut the night short and promised to call Tori again sometime and kissed her good night on the cheek. Tori flinched at the gesture and once she made it back to the apartment made sure to wash her face. Allison wasn't a terrible person, but Tori wanted nothing to do with her at such a high level. She made it clear to Cat it was a onetime deal and that she would never again go on a blind date. Cat's only response was a giggle and a thankful hug for such a great evening. She called it an early night and left Tori alone to enjoy was left of the late evening.
The soft knock from the fire escape claimed Tori's attention. She furrowed her brows upon seeing the blue eyed woman with a cocky grin waiting for her to open the window. Tori raised a brow in question before complying with the silent question and opening the window.
"Can I help you?" she asked with a teasing smirk.
Jade rolled her eyes. "It's not exactly spring out here, Vega. Do you want me to turn into a popsicle?" The puff of smoke was made to emphasize as she trembled from the cool night.
Tori giggled quietly and shook her head. "I suppose I don't want that," she said as she moved to allow the woman to enter the room. "I don't see how you can be so reckless and climb that ladder. Aren't you afraid you'll fall?" she asked once Jade was inside. She quickly glanced over at the door to make sure it was locked from the inside.
Jade gave her a mischievous grin. "I'm not easily frightened, Vega. And I'm most definitely not intimated by some ladder when at the end of it I get to see you." She wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist and pulled her close before gently kissing her.
Tori hummed in response. She grinned against the pair of cool lips before pulling back and settling down underneath the warm blankets of her bed. She gestured for Jade to join her and the woman did so. She set aside her jacket and boots and snuggled in underneath the blankets beside Tori. Her arms found their way around the brunette's waist as she scooted close to gain some warmth. "So are you ever going to tell me where home is?" Jade asked arching her head to meet the brown eyes.
"Berryessa," she said after a quiet moment. She sighed and dropped her gaze to look at their interlocked hands. It was comforting seeing their hands intertwined with each other. Despite all the guilt Tori knew she should feel, when she looked at their hands, it always seemed to diminish. She didn't understand how Jade managed to do that. She managed to make all her troubles go away during their moments together without even trying.
"I've decided not to go home for the holidays," she whispered into Jade's chest.
Jade raised a concerned brow. "Is something wrong?" She wasn't sure if Tori was upset about her mother or if there was some kind of problem suddenly changing the brunette's mind. Jade knew Tori wanted to be with her mother, what had suddenly changed?
Tori shook her head. "No, I just don't want to leave. I want to stay here this year." She drew a circle with her index finger over the sleeve covered arm belonging to the other woman and groaned. "I'm a terrible person aren't I?"
Jade tightened her hold around the brunette. "No, baby, you're not. Wanting to stay here doesn't make you a terrible person," she assured her. "Why do you want to stay?"
Brown eyes looked up. They searched in the blue eyes for a moment, deciding whether or not to verbalize their true reasoning. Jade understood the silent response and leaned down to press her lips softly to the brunette's temple. "You can spend the holidays with me," she whispered. Deep down she was excited with the idea of spending the holidays with Tori. They'd be able to spend more time together without having to hide. The red head was planning on going off to New York with her brother for the break after all.
Tori nodded and smiled moving closer into the arms wrapped around her. She found herself suddenly wanting to say the three words she'd only ever told her parents. As she looked up and met clear adoring blue, Tori knew she did want to say those three words, but found herself frightened by the idea of being rejected. Pressing her lips to the gently smiling ones she sat up and raised a questioning brow. "Now about that movie," Tori smiled.
"Point taken," Jade agreed. "I brought The Scissoring extended edition," she said proudly reaching for her bag.
"Oh no. Not that again," Tori began and moved to try and stop the woman from rising off the bed.
Jade smirked and jumped off before Tori could catch her. She inserted the disc and stuck her tongue out at the pouting brunette. She rolled her eyes and returned to the bed resuming her position next to the pouting woman. "If you don't wipe that look off your face, I'll just take off The Breakfast Club and really put on The Scissoring," Jade threatened.
Tori quickly lit up and kissed the woman hard. "You remembered," she said against smirking lips.
Before Jade could say another word the menu screened with the title of the said movie. She pulled the brunette closer and kissed her neck sweetly. "I'll always remember when it comes to you," she whispered as the movie began to play.
Tori felt her heart flutter with pure glee and content. Perhaps in time she would find the courage to say the three words, because she knew deep down it was too late to deny them. She loved Jade, loved her for who she was and who she was with her. She settled in the arms of the woman she loved and enjoyed one of her all-time favorite movies.
AN: I really hope some fluff made up for the lateness of the chapter ;)
I know it took longer than expected and I apologize! Life's been so overwhelming!
To be fair I just found out today I have spring break next week. Boy, are my days way off!
I'll be updating this again for sure next week! Promise!
I don't want to rush the story, please let me know if feel like it's being force. I'll do my best not to do that.
Let me know what you think! ;)
Please Review!