"I'm going to kill her." Dark Pit said angrily as he sprayed red spray paint all over Peach's official portrait.
"Hey!" Marth cried. "I want to be the one to do that! Do you know how annoying it was when Link was crying his eyes out?"
They were standing in the official Super Smash Bros portrait gallery. The portraits used to be honor everyone who had once predicated in the tournament, but now everyone vandalized them for fun.
"You're forgetting the most important part." Shulk said.
"What would that be?" Dark Pit asked as he turned away from his work. He had painted devil ears, a pitchfork in her hand and in a speech bubble he had written the words 'I'm A Useless Bratty Bitch'
"The fact that she has my daughter under her control." Robin mused as she touched her chin. Shulk knew she was a queen, but man. She didn't dress or act like one. It was a bit of a relief actually, to know that all Princesses weren't as vile and bratty as Peach.
"Oh right that!" Marth said as he opened a bag of sprinkles and dumped them down his throat.
"You'll choke if you do that." Shulk told Marth as Dark Pit pulled out a clarinet and began to play.
"See if I care!" Marth grumbled with the sprinkles still in his mouth.
"Idiot." Dark Pit snapped as he went back to the clarinet.
Robin slapped her head. "It's like I'm with Patrick, Squidward and SpongeBob." She muttered.
"What do you mean by that?" Shulk asked. "I'm nothing like SpongeBob!"
"You have the shorts and the hair." Robin mused.
"Anyways." Shulk said annoyed. "Time to move on to my master plan! Everyone listening?"
Everyone in the room nodded.
"Good." Shulk smiled. "Here's the plan. We're going to steal the contract from Peach and look for flaws. If it has none, we'll just go to plan B."
"But…That would mean…" Marth stammered. "Breaking into Peach's room!"
Shulk nodded. "That's what I plan on doing."
Marth and Dark Pit gasped at the same time.
"Are you crazy?" Dark Pit hissed. "No guy in Smash has just waltzed into a girl's room! Well expect for Wolf but everyone knows what Master Hand did to him."
"Exactly." Shulk smiled. "I know it's risky. Heck, I could get kicked out of smash all together. But if we don't, we'll be just giving up! Do you want Peach to win? Lucina isn't the last person she'll try to control! So. What do you say?"
"I'd say that was a bad attempt at an inspiring speech." Dark Pit muttered. "But whatever. It's not like I have better things to do."
"I'm in as well." Marth said. "I've always wanted to go into a girl's room! I wonder what snacks they eat. I always wanted to try foods that are meant for girls!"
"Good luck." Robin said as she walked out of the room. "And…be careful."
The three heroes walked for a while before stumbling upon Peach's door. A huge sign that read Peach's room sat on the door and many stickers of Peach where hung up.
"Why isn't our room's door decorated like this?" Marth asked. "I think some kitten posters would really make it stand out!"
"How about no." Dark Pit snapped. "Anyways, I'll stand guard and let you know if anyone's coming. Just an FYI if you get caught, I'm throwing you guys under the bus."
"Be careful." Shulk said as he and Marth entered Peach's room.
The walls were painted bright pink and there was one huge bed in the center of the room. A badly made pink sleeping bag laid next to the bed. A TV that was still on, sat in the middle of the room.
"Tonight on Keeping up with the Koopashian's." The TV boomed.
"Ok." Shulk said. "I'll look in the bed, while you look in the dresser."
"Got it." Marth hissed. He opened the first drawer and pulled out some bottles. "Pimple cream? Wart remover? Nose hair remover? Why do girls care about these things again?"
"I don't know." Shulk said as he flipped the covers up to reveal, not the contract, but two beds put together. After that Shulk looked under the bed, under the rugs and in the sleeping bag with no luck.
"WHAT THE HECK IS THIS!" Marth yelled as he pulled a green drink out of the cabinet.
"A kale smoothie." Shulk said as he looked under the TV as it showed pictures of a koopa with long sleek black hair.
"I call it pure evil." Marth hissed as he ripped off the label to reveal a document. "Really who eats these things?"
"MARTH!" Shulk yelled in shock. "That paper!" Give it to me!"
"Huh?" Marth said as he handed Shulk the paper. "Sure thing."
Shulk took a look at it and smiled. "This is it!" He cried. "The contract! Wait a second…did Peach seriously forget to… Never mind. Let's get out of here before someone catches us."
"Wha-Why?" Marth asked. "I wanted to try on some makeup… alright. Fine. Did you find an error?"
Shulk nodded as he and Marth walked out.
"Well that didn't take very long." Dark Pit said as he looked up from the book he was reading (The Tell-Tale Heart). "Did you get the contract?"
"Yep!" Shulk beamed. "And I already found the error! You probably won't believe this but Peach forgot to sign her name."
"She did what?" Marth asked. "Wow. That's a whole new level of stupid. Anyways, where is she?"
"Let me check her Instagram." Dark Pit said as he opened his phone. "She's at the Fountain. Let's go."
The three of them walked for minutes until finally arriving at the Fountain, a place people rarely visited. When a smasher died in the real world, the Fountain became their life force. Peach was sitting with her legs crossed regally. Zelda was next to her, unhappily giving her some water to drink.
"Peach!" Shulk yelled as he waved the contract in the air.
"Wha- how did you get that!" Peach cried. "Did you break into my room?"
"Yes." Marth smirked. "And you won't tell anyone about it!"
Peach's eyes narrowed. "What makes you say that?" she hissed.
"I found some wart remover in your room." Marth smiled. "And I'll let everyone know about it if you snitch."
"Makes since a witch would have something to remove her warts." Dark Pit mused. "I have a question to ask you. If I drop a bucket of water on you… will you melt?"
Peach turned redder than a tomato. "W-What is the meaning of this!" she cried. "Did you only come here to attack me?"
"No, we came here to tell you that your contract is invalid." Shulk grinned. "You forgot to sign your name. Therefore Lucina is free. Now where is she?"
Peach slapped her head. Then she smiled and began to laugh. "You won't be seeing her anytime soon!" she howled. "She isn't free from me yet!"
Shulk felt a terrified chill as Dark Pit and Marth walked over to the side of the fountain that had water meant for drinking with a giant bucket. "Wha-What did you do!" He cried. "If you hurt her… I'll kill you!"
"Relax I didn't hurt her." Peach smiled. "I just locked her in the Ceaseless Tower!"
Shulk gasped in horror.
The Ceaseless Tower was a huge tower near the edge of the Smash Mansion. There were a million steps to climb, and half way through there was a rest area that was huge. It stretched the size of a mountain.
"Oh and did I mention?" Peach said innocently. "I set a dragon up to guard the door. Also, if you try to recuse her you will miss the ball."
"I don't care about that stupid ball." Shulk snarled. "I'm going to save her."
"You can try, but you're no prince!" She laughed. "Only a prince could save a Prince-AUGGHHHHH!" she screamed as Marth and Dark Pit soaked her with water from the bucket.
"Huh." Dark Pit said. "She didn't melt. How peculiar."
I have to save her! Shulk thought to himself. I don't care what I have to do, or how I have to do it but I will save her even if it's the last thing I do!