So, after I came home from school today, I checked how many reviews this got. I ended up literally screaming about HOW THIS GOT 30 REVIEWS! Holy shit, I ended up with 6 new ones after I posted the last chapter, so thank you for that.
(NOT-SO-IMPORTANT: IF YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO READ THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A "STORY" THEN PLEASE SKIP ALL THE RANDOM BULLSHIT I AM ABOUT TO TALK ABOUT AND START AT THE WORD "DISCLAIMER", OR WHATEVER WORD I USE TO START THIS STORY IDK)
Anonymous, thank you for the regular review, but I believe you forgot that nobody remembers Mysterion can't die. Psycho, I won't be ripping off The Dark Knight THAT much, but thanks again for the review! To " " that suddenly took the privilege to not delete my fanfiction at 8am this morning, thank you, for your trolling efforts have given me another review, and thus, making my story seem more popular. No, I won't get rid of you, because you are now my favourite comedy. Tripply, thank you for saying that my story is kick ass, and I actually try to make it seem like a movie in my mind. I hope you enjoyed my last story too, and thanks for the review! Rather Concerned, I have not forgotten about you. The girls in South Park will have their heroic moments eventually, specifically Wendy, because boy I have some plans for her.
Anyway, back to the story!
Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.
The Next Evening
Mysterion's PoV
"GAH! WHY ARE THEY SHOOTING AT US!" The spazzy blonde said behind me as I make a sharp left to lose the remaining attackers.
"Will you please stay calm?" I ask him softly so he wouldn't freak out even MORE.
There really wasn't any point to be honest. The poor guy had been through enough tonight, being kidnapped at work, wired to a number of bombs at Denver's Clock Tower. After I saved him, we began to get shot from the base of the clock tower so I had to glide him to my bike, and he was pretty much SCREAMING all the time, and here we are, getting chased by a bunch of hired guns, but I have a plan.
I light a few firecrackers before throwing them behind me, causing a number of deafening bangs, but most importantly, a smoke cloud.
"AGHHHH! WHAT WERE THOSE BANGS?! WHY WAS THERE EXPLOSIONS?! WHAT IS GOING ON?!" Tweek screams from behind me as I take a quick detour through a local park, and it seems I have given myself enough time to set this plan in motion. It may seem like I have given those hired guns a trail to where I was going, due to the tracks in the park, but I'm about to lead them into a trap.
Tweek and I arrive at one of Trent Boyett's old abandoned warehouses that were ransacked by the cops over the last six months. The lights inside shine dimly as I hide the motorcycle and I grapple up to the scaffolding with Tweek, stuttering and stammering through God-knows-what kind of crazy crap he's talking to himself about.
"I won't stress this enough, because I don't have that much time, but you have to stay hidden and be extremely quiet, or they will kill you, okay?" I say to him calmly. Even though I mentioned that he might die, he seemed to be fine with it, and hid in the dark somewhere.
Suddenly, about 20 men burst in, 10 with automatic rifles, and the other 10 with shotguns.
"They must've come in here! Search the entire area and shoot anything that moves, got it?" One of the men orders the rest, who all nod in response.
Trying to fight them head on would be suicide, as I would be vastly outnumbered in both men and firepower. However, I could pick them off one by one, by hiding in the scaffolding and striking in the darkness. Stealth will be key for the first 10-15 people, then I could probably pick off the rest like child's play.
I notice one that has seemed to have strayed from the group, so I silently jump down behind him and then quickly choke him into unconsciousness, before grappling back up to the scaffolding. I then notice another two men that I can take them both down silently, so I hop down behind them, before doing grabbing the first dude, spin-kicking the second guy, and choking him with my legs while I choke the other man with my arms, making them both fall into unconsciousness.
There are too many of them in the light, so I take out my shuriken and I throw it at the main light in the middle. The men seem to freak out, and they start to split up. Not only does this give me added darkness to work with, but it may also make the others split up even more, giving me some more opportunities to take them out silently.
As a matter of fact, it's doing so right now. I hop down and choke another two men out, but instead of grappling up, I sneak into the middle to pick up my shuriken, and to choke out another gunman. I then grapple to the scaffolding again and wait for a gunman to walk directly under me. Instead of choking him out, I try out a new tactic I thought of earlier today. I grab him from the ground before grappling back up again, tying him to some rope and dropping him back down.
"AGH! HELP ME OVER HERE! HE'S GOT ME!" He screams as I grapple to the other side of the room. As suspected, a number of them rush to his aid, leaving a stray over on this side. I do the same thing, grappling up and dropping him from the rafters.
"HEY! HE'S GOT ME TOO, GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!" He begs as I wait in the corner. A bunch of the henchmen now go over to him, leaving me with henchmen trying to untie their comrades from the rope. 3 at each man, including the hanging gunmen which, interestingly enough, happen to be in a straight line of each other. I lower myself down with my grappling hook, before throwing my shuriken, cutting both of the ropes holding the two men, and crashing them down into their waiting comrades below. I head to the first crash sight to quickly pick up my shuriken before anyone spots me, and I also silently choke out a surviving gunman.
"What the hell is going on over there?" One gunman shouts from nearby. I quickly jump on top of him and choke him out with my legs, knocking him out. I then grapple up to the scaffolding to determine my next move.
Let's see, 20 men came in, 14 men already unconscious. I see the gunmen starting to group up again in the middle, but they are still far apart from each other.
Eh, might as well.
I jump down, landing on top of one, and then smashing his head into the ground, knocking him out. I move to another lone gunman, putting him into a headlock.
"Hey! I see him!" One nearby gunman shouts, so I quickly throw my shuriken into his hand, disarming him, as I choke this gunman out, before quickly running to the disarmed gunman, kneeing him in the face, knocking him out. I then take my shuriken again before grapple up to get out of view of the rest.
The 4 remaining gunmen group up in the middle of the room, watching each other's backs. Time to end that. I drop a lit pack of firecrackers near their location, and the bangs disorientated them enough to split up a bit. The smoke cloud blinds their view, and I hop down, waiting for the smoke to clear. When it does, I stand before the remaining 4 terrified gunmen, their hands shaking in fear. I rush the nearest, striking him in the mid-section, elbowing him in the chest, and then knocking him out with a right hook. I knock two gunmen's weapons out of their hands, before dodging one of their punches, elbowing him in the face making him fall to the ground, spin-kicking the other dude so that he falls to the ground, and I slam their heads together on the floor, knocking them both out. The remaining gunman attempts to shoot me, so I use another firecracker to disorientate him, grappling up back to the scaffolding.
After the smoke clears, I see him frantically looking around him, completely paranoid. Time to end his misery.
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!" He screams as I jump down behind him.
"Here." He turns around, so I knock his shotgun from his hand, then grab his right arm, break it with a horrific -CRACK-.
"GAHHH!" He screams in agony as I flip him over my head onto the ground, and then I stomp on his face, knocking him out.
I grapple back up to where Tweek was hiding, and by the look on his face, it seems like he was about to pass out.
"I-is it o-o-ver?" He stammers.
"Yes, it is. Time to get you home." I say, and I lower ourselves down to the battlefield below, safety escorting him to my bike.
At South Park
I drop the twitchy teen back at his parents house, and I ride to my usual bike hiding place. The difference being, I don't have to kill myself today. I run back to my house, quickly changing out of my masked costume.
"Alright, I have to be at Bebe's in- 5 MINUTES?!" I check my watch. I quickly scan through my wardrobe to find some decent looking clothes, without too many holes in them. Oh shit, there's no clean underwear.
"Eh, fuck it, I'll go commando, she'd probably prefer it anyway." I smile to myself before realising I'm on a limited time schedule. I check my watch again, and I have about 3 minutes. Good enough. I climb out of my window, nearly tripping, and I rush to Bebe's house.
When I get there, I'm pretty much out of breath. I ring her doorbell, and I analyse what she's wearing. Black skinny jeans, and a red tank top. Her hair is down, and in the usual curls. She's beautiful, and her taste in clothes is great, but that doesn't really matter since they're all coming off anyway.
"Hey McCormick, I thought you might not show." She says.
"Well, I'm here -cough- now." I pant.
"Why are you so out of breath?" She asks. Oh, was it really that noticeable?
"Oh, I just rushed back from a job. Let's cut the chit chat shall we?" I say in a seductive whisper, and Bebe grabs my hand and pretty much drags me upstairs.
We barge into her bedroom and start making out on the bed. She quickly rips off my jacket as I take off her tank top, revealing all but a bra. I take my shirt off as she pulls away from me, moving to my lower-section. She begins giggling in an absolute sexy way as she starts unbuttoning my pants.
Oh, this is going to be a fantastic night.
The Next Morning
I wake up in her bed, naked. The sun is shining through the closed curtains, and I look right next to me, to the sleeping, naked Bebe. She suddenly wakes up, and places an arm on my chest.
"Morning Ken." She says.
"Morning Bebe."
"So, what did you think of that?" She whispers in my ear.
"Best. Sex. Ever." I say with a huge grin on my face. She smiles in victory as we look around the room. The whole place is a mess, especially the table, we did it there for quite a while. We then gaze into each other's eyes. She's probably thinking of something romantic, but a different, and haunting thought comes to my mind.
"Bebe, do you think that Butters will come for us?" I ask her. She begins to laugh, before finally opening her mouth.
"Even if he does, I'm pretty sure Mysterion will save us. I mean, I've heard stories from the others, and he seems to be quite the hero." She says. I lay back before realising something.
"What if he can't save everyone? He's just one man, he has limits. What if Butters does something that will just make Mysterion snap? What then?" I ask her.
"Mysterion isn't just a person, he's more than that. Sure, he is just human, but the things that he has done have been incredible. I hope that Mysterion won't give up, and even if he does, eventually, I hope that he saved at least the spirits of these people." She says.
"And besides, I don't need Mysterion, I've got you." She smiles before we kiss again.
"You know, my parents won't be coming back until at least 5 o'clock, so do you want a nice little wake up call?" She asks, before she moves her hand down my body, to my mid-section, and then to my, well, you know.
"Oh, you know me so well." We both smile as she ducks under the covers again.
A/N: Finally, I have written a decent playboy Kenny that might still piss off the sex-hungry readers for not having enough smut. Boy, do I love writing the actions scenes too, especially after playing two Batman Arkham games since the last major fight scenes. Anyway, if you enjoyed this chapter, or downright hated it, please leave a review because I will appreciate all feedback and criticism! And as always…
Thanks for Reading!