Chapter 7 mother dearest

Beca sighed she played with the glass, taking her time to finish her drink. To this day she loved her mother, she really did. Even, after everything she did to her. All the abuse that she dished out to her both verbal and physical, she had a very selective memory when she was younger. Where her mother could do no wrong and every time her mother punished her was because Beca did something 'bad'.

Jane Mitchell was a smart, funny and beautiful woman with a future ahead of her, that kids weren't in her plan. She met James Mitchell and everything changed she fell pregnant and at first wanted a termination but against James' wishes and the promise he would stand by her, she loved him and agreed.

James kept his promise and they soon got married and were happy for a while. Jane however had a difficult time during her pregnancy and any career plan she wanted was put on hold as James achieved a good job in a top high school teaching English Literature and earned enough for the family whilst Jane looked after the baby.

Jane kept her feelings bottle up, the jealousy she felt as her dreams for a career as a surgeon was pushed back. Everything that she worked hard for to achieve her goal, she gave it all up for a baby; that she did not want but decieded to keep because of her love for James.

James did notice she was not happy but he tried his best to reassure her that most expecting mothers feel this way at first but will be different when their baby arrives.

When Beca arrived however Jane could not look at her let alone hold her, she looked at James and saw how besotted he was whilst holding his baby girl. Promising to protect and give her the best life for her. Jane felt guilty in feeling the way she did and hopefully the feeling will past in time.

James voiced his concerns when he saw that his wife was not bonding with their baby and he had to step in when she would leave baby Beca crying and in a dirty nappy, he begged for her to get help but she refused and kept everything bottled up.

When Beca was five she accidently spilled her juice on the carpet and her mother gave her a slap across the face and forced the girl to clean it up, when she couldn't she apologised profusely to her and promised that she will try better.

Her parents tried to hide their arguments from her with Jane refusing to seek any help and due to her insecurities things between them have escalated.

Her father was now a highly respected professor at Barndale University and it took up all his time. He tried his best to be there for his family and to pay Beca attention to comfort her when she need it. Her mother was in between jobs. Beca, back then never knew why she could not hold a job, to her, her mother was beautiful, smart and funny. She wanted her mother's love so much that she was blind about her mother's treatment of her and her drinking problem.

The door slammed behind her "BECA! BECA!" her mother shouted as she ran up the stairs and heard the loud music blasting away. She then turned back to her husband. "Let's talk about this later…" James sighed he again saw his wife drink back her whiskey and went upstairs to speak to their daughter, whose music was now blaring though out the house.

He wanted a divorce he couldn't take seeing his wife abusing her body with alcohol anymore, he also wanted full custody of Beca. He would stay with her if she gets help but she never had and it resulted her losing her jobs because either she turned up late or her attitude towards her customers was awful.

Jane reached her daughter's door and instead of knocking on it she barged in. "Heard of knocking?"

"What the HELL was that?" Her mother shouted as she turned the music turned down.

"Me slamming the door." Beca saw her mother lifting her hand up but stop when she saw Beca cowering further back. Jane was trying to control her temper towards Beca.

Jane sighed and sat down beside her daughter. "What happened?" She asked as she pointed at the marks that are beginning to form into bruises. "Nothing, just a result of friends going their separate ways."

'"You and Casey?" Beca nodded her head and put her head on her mother's shoulder, she did not miss how mother flinched at her touch. "Growing up is never easy." Beca just nodded just taking in her mother's present. "What was it all about?"

"Just some rumours about me being gay." Her mother looked at her in disappointment. "Are you?"

Beca shook her head. "No, but would you disown me if I was?" Her mother sighed. "It's your life at the end of the day. I just don't want to see it being flaunt in my face. But no, I won't disown you." Beca smiled she knew it was the best answer that her mother could give.

Her mother suddenly stood up. "As long as you are okay…" She then left. Beca sighed and turn full volume on her music once again getting lost in the music.

"Everything alright?"

"If you want a divorce I will give you it. But I will fight you for Beca." Warren could not believe what he was hearing. "You want full custody of Beca. To spite me?"

"I know I am not the best mother in the world but at least I'm here when she needs me."

"I'm here for her."

"Really? When was the last time you spoke to her? You have done nothing but put pressure on her to get good grades." James sighed he hate to admit it but his job has it downfalls and taken up most of his time. Every time he wanted to spend it with Beca something came up or they end up arguing over her studies. "Besides we both know that she would always choose me over you."

"You better not hurt her." James warned. "You're the one that's walking out of her life. I don't think I can hurt her as much as you, right now."

James knows what his wife was doing, they had the argument so many times she resents both him and Beca, Beca because she was reminded of when she had dreams at her age. She wanted James to pay for making her have Beca, making her choose a baby that she didn't want and sacrifice her career for him. Just to hurt him, he also knew that Beca had started to be happy as she started to date a good lad, uprooting her now she might resent him. His hands are tied.

"Okay, she stays here."

They sat Beca down and told about getting a divorce, Beca notice her mum reaching for the bottle. "Dad if it's about my studies I will study harder and get in a good college. Please stay…Don't leave."

"I need to go Beca, we can't live like this."

"So, are you leaving us for a slutty colleague of yours?"

"Beca…It's not like that! And watch your language young lady!"

"No! I do not want to hear this…You can work this out!" Beca looking over at her mother to argue about this dick move. But she just kept on drinking. "Mum! Say something. Mum!"

Her mother carried on drinking. "It's want he wants."

The first few days was fine between mother and daughter, then when Jane started to go out more and brought different guys at home every night the arguments started. Beca was starting to realise her mother's drinking problem was getting more out of hand she begged her to seek help, resulting her mum to raise her voice or chuck things at her.

One night it got out of hand words were said and a belt was used.

Beca walked in on her mother and another random guy with his top off kissing in the kitchen she made herself known by not a subtle cough. "Entertaining guests I see." Beca just standing there making the guy uneasy that he excused himself and left. "At least this time I hope you got his name. Or should I call him barely legal guy. I mean he looks like he's only a few years older than me."

"Watch your mouth, my girl…" Beca didn't miss the angry look in her mother's eyes, she knew she should have stopped but she was sick with worry about her mother's behaviour that she did not know how to handle it. "I'm just worried about you, maybe it's time to talk to someone about getting help."

"Are you calling me a drunk?" Jane went on the defensive. "No! I'm not calling you a drunk, all I'm saying you should get some help. I mean how many men are you going to shack up with?"

"That is none of your business who I date or who I bring home." Beca saw her mum pouring herself another drink and walking up to her so Beca would take a step back bumping into the kitchen counter. "I'm… I'm… just worried, that's all"

"You know this is your fault!"

"Mum?"

"You weren't planned…You're the reason that your dad left us because you're stupid! You're the reason I am a stay at home mum and you're the reason I am like this…" Beca can feel the tears filling up her eyes and she turned away. "I never wanted you…" Her mother spat out.

Beca put the insults down to the alcohol and made a grab for her drink.

"I guess I have to be the adult here then." Beca went towards her mum and grabbed the glass out of her hand, but her mum wouldn't give the glass without a fight. Suddenly, the glass fell and Beca felt herself being pushed onto the kitchen floor. "Now look what you had done! There's glass everywhere!" Beca hissed as some pieces of glass got embedded into her hand. "Sorry please don't be mad… I'm just worried about you."

"Don't be! But a lesson has to be learnt…" Beca eyes went wide as she saw her mother taking her belt off and holding it by the buckle end, her cries fell on deaf ears when the pain got too much.

When the divorce was finalised was when she fought with Casey and her mother was fuming. "FIGHTING! FIGHTING!... "

"Mum… You know why…" Beca was cut off as she tried to explain. "What is wrong with you?..." Mary smacked Beca at the side of the head. "…It is bad enough you are not doing well with school as it is, but FIGHTING! You were close to getting suspended. You didn't even tell them about Casey bullying you! If you did then they would help you."

"Mum it's not the simple…"

"Go to your room!"

"Mum…"

"JUST GO…I do not want to see you for the rest of the evening."

"But mum…" Beca received a smack to her face. "GO!"

Beca did not argue she did what she was told and headed straight to her room and again listening to her music.

After Jane calmed down she went upstairs and knocked on Beca's door, when hearing the 'come in' Jane sat down on Beca's bed and sighed as she apologised. "I'm sorry."

"I know."

"I am really trying here… I got some help."

"I know…" Beca tried to get close to her mother but Jane stood up. "You need to speak to your dad. He's been asking for you."

"I will."

Beca from then on spend most of her time messing about with music and found it easier to express her feelings with music, apart from Michael.

When Casey's funeral been and gone Jane did her best to comfort her but she still found it hard. "It does get easier in time."

"Will it?" Jane forced herself to give Beca a hug even if it was for a minute, which Beca cherished. As Mary stood up she looked around her desk and saw all Beca's music USB. "You done this?" Jane asked surprised. "Yes."

"Can I listen to some of it?" Beca could not refuse she could see her mum is trying and was happy to play some of her demos.

After listening to a couple of tracks Beca saw her mum smiled briefly. "You have got some talent here." Beca blushed and in shock of her mother's compliment.

As the months went by daughter and mother relationship was slowly getting there whilst her father's was getting more strained. "I am not going to the wedding!"

"Beca he is your father!"

"He's the one that left me, left us! And now, now he wants me to see him get married with that SLUT!"

"Beca…"

"No and that's final…" Jane sighed as she spoke into the phone. "I cannot force her James… If she does not want to go then she does not want to go!... No I did not put her up to it! I could not give a shit what you do…" With that Jane slammed the phone down.

When Michael died, she was on the verge of packing her bags and leaving to go to LA to follow her dreams. "Your dad is offering you a chance of a life time, take it."

"I want nothing to do with him and he can shove it! I just want to go to LA and pay my dues." Hearing Beca rejecting her father's offer of free education cause Jane to see red as she had to work hard to pay for her place at college. "You ungrateful little BITCH!" She shouted making Beca jump and fear of being hit. "Do you have any idea how many people will jump at the chance for a free place? You are going to Barden University and that's the end of it! Besides who will fund your little adventure to LA? If you think it will be me you would be wrong. Let's face it without this free opportunity you will never have got in."

Beca sighed as the memories came and went, she enjoyed her time at Barden, she met great people she let her wall down and made friends for life.

Six months ago, THAT incident ruined everything that she had worked hard to overcome her fear.

Six months ago, she again ran away instead of facing her problems and never looked back.

TBC...