He just showed up out of the blue. And it was that day that Alex knew he had finally snapped. How else was he supposed to feel about his own voice in his own head giving him the "Reason You Suck Speech" for everything he did? The answer was he didn't know, so he just assigned himself a gender in his head and went along with life like normal. Or as normal as it could get.

Thankfully this extra voice in his head picked and chose the moments it would suddenly assault him with barbs against his already crippled self-esteem. These moments were usually the night shift, or when Alex was utterly alone, or at home. Very rarely was it during the day around a large group of people. But quite normally, after lunches with his sister, or Karen.

Moments like those were Alex feels human, and He can't stand to let that happen.

But it's not that bad yet. Alex hasn't given Him a name yet, nor is he talking to thin air as if there's another person next to him. He just mumbles arguments under his breath to himself as he re-stocks shelves or nukes a frozen dinner in his microwave. If he could afford it, he'd definitely go see a psychologist and get it checked out because mental diseases are the last things he needs to start developing, especially at thirty-two.

Really other than that, he's positively healthy. Mentally anyway.

x-X-X-x

Elizabeth Greene fell in love with him the moment she laid eyes on him. It was Alex's first day of work at the store, a green around the gills bag boy with a useless degree in science. Heller had shoved Alex at her with strict instructions that Greene train him. As if he needed training as a bag boy of all things. But that was also the day Alex's extreme hatred for his manager began.

There were two kinds of unstableness in this world. There was Alex's kind, and then there was Greene's kind. And in comparison to Greene, Alex was arguably more sane than her. The customers generally found her unsettling, with her perpetual wide eyes and broad, toothy grin. It was like she had stolen the Cheshire Cat's face and wore it as a mask.

She didn't know boundaries with people, or at least, not with him. Since day one she was always touching him, getting in his face, and sneaking up behind him to grab at his ass (she said he had amazing glutes, he wasn't sure how to feel about that). Every February fifteenth, she filled his locker with Valentine's cards that all said "Be Mine" or "Sexy Thang" written in her flowery, loopy handwriting. And she bought all of them, simply because "They were just so cheap, I just had to!". Then after she said that, she kissed his cheek a couple dozen times as he stared out over her shoulder with a look on his face that easily read "shoot us both, please".

Green her had her moments, though. She had this incredible sense of when Alex was having one of those weeks, and as such, would sometimes surprise him with treats from the Starbucks counter. And for once, she was smiling normally, and staring down at him in almost motherly manner that Alex otherwise unfamiliar with.

"Hang in there, Hotty McScotty" she'd say to him, and give him a thumbs up as she walked away. Elizabeth was actually the nicest person towards him on the entire staff. It was just kinda too bad that she was completely batshit crazy.

x-X-X-x

But James Heller though.

Heller didn't really like anybody. He also didn't really like his job. He was an ex-Marine, honorably discharged, also hit hard in the recession. Went from a respected Marine sergeant, to the eventual manager of a grocery store of all things. He looked incredibly out of place in a in their plain, store shirt and apron. He was a six foot mass of bulging muscles, a face locked in a scowl, and had it out for everyone who worked with him.

For whatever reason, he hated Alex the most. Just, the moment he saw him…It was hate at first sight. First day on the job, and he made one fanatic, and one enemy. He and Heller were forever locked, in eternal combat. Heller couldn't just fire him for not liking him, and Alex couldn't find it in himself to quit his job just to avoid one person. The job market was so rickety right now, Alex didn't want to find out just how hard it was to get hired these days. Among other reasons.

So they just silently hated each other and merely retaliated in the most passive-aggressive manners possible. Quite honestly it was the one exciting thing about coming into work.

x-X-X-x

Alex received two surprises when he got home from his first shift. One was his baby sister sitting on the steps to his apartment. The other was the cat being pet and rubbed by said baby sister. Both were a weird sight, because Zeus still didn't like people (except for him of course in some weird way), and what in the actual fuck was his sister doing here?

Yes, Alex loved his little sister dearly and would never turn her away, and cherished every moment spent with her. But he always had to worry whenever she popped up unannounced because it naturally could only mean something had gone terribly wrong. Yet, Dana looked up at him with an excited grin on her face. Dana hopped up to her feet to attack him with hugs.

"Hey kiddo" Alex greets hers, wrapping his arms around her and kissing the top of her head.

"Hey bro!" Dana says back. "Hope you're not busy, caaaause I came to surprise you with my presence. You're welcome"

As if Alex could turn her away. Dana's the only person in the universe that's allowed to unexpectedly pop up at his apartment. She only lived on the other side of town, but like Karen, Alex saw so little of her, his life was mainly focused on the one whole road in town, and everyone he was remotely friendly with didn't live anywhere near it. But these little visits were welcome (but only from his sister)

His apartment always feels smaller when there's another person in it. It was already small to begin with, his bed and dresser literally the only two things that took up most of the room. He didn't even have a table in his tiny kitchen, nor any chairs. Alex generally didn't eat inside anyway, he normally just took a folding beach chair. chucked it on top of the garages, and climbed up to eat up there. But that wasn't something he was about to attempt with Dana.

"I don't have much to feed you with" Alex says to her as he digs through his refrigerator.

"It's fine" Dana laughs, flopping herself on his bed. "I didn't come here to mooch off you. You're the one who should be eating anyway!"

Dana is also the only other person in the universe who can tell him to do anything, and he'd do it. So they just talk as Alex heats himself a microwavable TV dinner, much like his date with Karen, they just catch up on life. Even with a phone and internet, Alex so rarely talks to anybody. He tends to feel guilty for not staying in constant contact with his sister. He normally reasons with himself that he nearly spent his entire childhood with her, it couldn't be that bad that they didn't spend as much time with each other, or didn't talk to each other enough.

But she always ends up here because she misses him, and it leaves a sour taste in his mouth because he knows no matter what, he's still been ignoring her.

"Have you been okay?" Dana suddenly asks him. Alex just stares at her in confusion as he picks through his dinner. "I mean, have you been doing alright? You've been taking care of yourself, haven't you?"

"Of course I have been" Alex reassures her. "I should be asking you the same question, shouldn't I?"

And he forces himself to smile at her. Even now, he can't bring himself to appear weak to her. To tell her how sick he's been, how tired. It's something that's carried over from childhood, when she would look up at him like he was an almighty god, a force to be reckoned with that loved her no matter what. He forgets she's not ten anymore, that she's an adult and can take care of herself, and knows a lie when she hears one. The look she gives him only confirms it.

How lovely of you…lying to your little sister. Just can't let anyone care about you, huh?

Just wanna say, thanks for reading you guys!