Authors note: I wanted to get this chapter out before tonight's episode because that way I'm on schedule again (well, as much as possible). I literally can't wait for tonight, an epic showdown people! Team Evil all the way. I'm actually starting to get a little annoyed by Zelena, I mean, come on, wicked west? She's saying the word 'wicked' a little too much for my taste. Hope you guys enjoy it! ;)
Trigger warning: Small mention of suicide in the second part!
...
~ The Enchanted Forest, Past. ~
Snow sighed as she let her forehead fall against the solid wooden door, causing a loud thump to echo throughout the hollow and empty hallway.
Two weeks.
Two damn weeks since anyone had seen her former stepmother leave her bedchamber, not that they cared, because to be completely honest, no one but Snow really did. And Robin. Robin cared too, Snow saw it in the way the hope in his eyes slightly dimmed whenever he stepped foot into the dining room and noticed the absence of the brunette Queen.
Yes, Robin cared too.
Snow hadn't a clue what happed that caused Regina to feel the need to lock herself in her room for a full two weeks. The younger brunette was certain that if she hadn't thought about leaving a full plate of food outside of Regina's door every day, the Queen would've simply let herself starve to death.
"Regina?" She asked for the fourth time that morning, though she could already guess today was another day of staring at the dark wood of the door that remained closed, waiting for the Queen to reveal herself.
Snow leaned back against the stone wall facing the double doors and scooted down to the floor. Her legs were bent at the knees, her feet flat against the cobblestones.
"She still won't come out?"
Snow looked up with a start, she hadn't even heard the archer approach. Though it probably was because he is an archer. Light on his feet and all that stuff.
"No." Snow shook her head as she smiled at the man. "But who knows, maybe today's the day."
Robin rubbed his tired eyes as he sat down next to the princess. "I hope." He tried to smile. "Roland has been asking about her, the Queen has made quite an impression on him. He misses her."
"And you? What about you?"
There was a long silence as Robin tried to contemplate how to answer the princess' question. Because it sure as hell was a good one.
What about him? Sure, he knew he liked her, the brunette was gorgeous, sexy, and her smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, she had humor and was kind - well, to Roland at least.
And maybe a little to him too.
But Regina was also hurt, sad, maybe even broken.
Could he be the one to mend her heart back together, when he wasn't even sure if he loved her? She was not a project, he realised that. And he was certain that she wasn't an Evil Queen either- or at least not anymore.
Was that small spark he felt every time he thought about her, or laid eyes on her, love? He did not know, but one thing was certain;
"I miss her too."
...
Two weeks earlier...
Blood pumped in her ears as Regina got closer and closer to her room. Tinkerbell had to know about all this, right? She was the one behind this. She had to be. Because Regina had long since given up on believing in destiny, or fate, or any other crap like that.
With a subtle flik of her wrist the heavy double doors leading to her bedchamber opened and Regina stormed in, hearing the click of the locks turning as they closed again. She never stopped to calm down, instead all but ran towards the balcony that overlooked the entire garden. Her hands grabbed the steel banister and she couldn't help but remember the time she'd almost fallen to her death because the thing had given away.
At least that was her story, no one needed to know that she had a moment of weakness and preferred death over the life she was leading back then.
But that was then, and now she did have something to live for. She would make Henry proud, even though he didn't remember her.
"Tinkerbell, you damn musquito, get over here now!" She yelled into the frigid night air, puffs of moisture becoming visible in the darkness.
Then she waited, hoping that those damn wings had improved in speed. And luckily they had, because not even a minute later, green glitters started to appear in the dark sky.
"No need to be rude, Regina." The fairy sighed in a high voice as she flicked her green wand and enveloped herself in sparkly green dust. A second later Regina found herself staring at a human sized Tinkerbell. "What is it?"
"You knew he was here, didn't you?!" Regina growled and took a threatening step closer, now almost nose to nose with the blonde fairy.
"To be honest, I have no idea who you're talking about, Regina."
"Oh don't play dumb, dear." Regina said in a low voice. "You know that the man with the lion tattoo is here, you knew it all along."
Tinkerbell blinked in surprise but then grinned. "He's here? That's great! You found your second chance at true love!" She said happily.
"No I have not!" Regina yelled as tears filled her eyes. "I may have had a chance back then, when I my heart wasn't completely dark, when I wasn't... poison." The words came out in a broken whisper as Regina lowered her eyes. It was true, she was poison. Everything she touched withered away and eventually died. Her father, her mother, Daniel...
He would be disgusted by the person she was today. She may have made the ultimate sacrifice by saving Henry and Emma from the curse, but still... She was and is the Evil Queen. And maybe that's all she'll ever be.
"Why, Regina? You can have your happy ending." The fairy said softly as she tried to catch Regina's eyes, but failed.
"I cannot do that to him." Regina said with a shake of her head. "He can never know his true love is the Evil Queen, he will hate me, he will be disgusted."
"No, Regina, no." Tinkerbell said as she put one hand on the brunette's shoulder and was surprised that Regina allowed it, instead of shrugging it off immediately. "That's the beauty of true love, he'll learn to see past your flaws, he'll learn to see past your broken and dark heart, maybe even mend it. He'll love you, Regina. He'll be your happy ending."
Tinkerbell could feel the sudden shift in the air, the previous sadness that had been practically radiating off the Queen, now turned to and icy cold that chilled the blonde to the bone. Her hand was roughly shrugged off as Regina finally looked up to meet her eyes. The brown orbs were cold and vacant.
Similar to the words that left her dark red lips.
"But don't you know, fairy? I'm a villain, and villains don't get their happy endings."
...
~ Storybrooke, Present. ~
Regina sighed as she dropped her purse down on the table. Her fingers quickly unbuttoned her black coat and she hung it over the back of the chair. "I need to be out there, searching, instead of just sitting here." She said as she smoothed a hand through her dark locks.
"Regina, you're exhausted and you know it." Robin said with a smile. He shrugged out off his jacket and moved to stand behind her. "You need some rest, darling." He grinned and softly started to massage her shoulder.
Regina moaned softly and let her head fall back against his shoulder. His skilled fingers were loosening the knots in her tense muscles one by one. "God, you've convinced me." She sighed and leaned back into his touch.
Robin's grin was still intact when he leaned over and softly started nipping at her tanned throat. He chuckled against her skin and brought his hands around her waist to slowly rub circles on her pregnant stomach. "I'm glad." He sighed happily. "How about we take a quick shower before we pick up Roland from school?"
"Great idea, dear. It would save us water and time if we do it together." She grinned and took one of his hands from her stomach to weave their fingers together.
"I love it when you're thinking efficiently."
...
Regina was standing in front of the full length mirror, staring intently at her figure as her fingertips traced invisible patterns over her bare stomach.
"Shouldn't you be getting dressed, darling." Robin smiled as he pulled his pants up his legs. "Not that I mind the view." He grinned, eyeing her bare figure, clad in only lacy dark red lingerie. He zipped up the fly of his jeans and moved to stand behind her, enjoying the feeling of the bare skin of her back connecting with his bare chest.
Regina chuckled quietly and leaned back against him. "I'm already getting huge, don't you think?" She asked and slowly moved her hands on the skin of her prominent belly. Hiding had been impossible since the start of month four. At first she had been worried about what the townspeople would say, seeing that almost no one knew. Only she herself, Robin, Roland and accidentally Snow - of course the woman had to barge into the kitchens the moment Regina was trying to find out if she was really pregnant - which lead to Charming knowing.
After all those years, Snow White still hadn't learn to keep her big mouth shut. Though by now, Regina was used to it.
But after everyone found out, Regina was relieved to say that they hadn't done anything, some of the townspeople had even congratulated them.
Still, their shocked faces when they'd noticed were still worth gold.
...
"Robin, I really can't hide it anymore! It's damn impossible!" Regina yelled in frustration and threw her dark purple jacket on the bed, right next to his unexpected form.
Robin sat up with a smile, letting the sheet pool around his waist and exposing his bare chest, Regina couldn't help but glance at the defined muscles for a second. "Than why don't we let everyone know?"
Her brown eyes snapped up to lock with his. "No! That's to dangerous!" Regina said with fear and shook her head.
"Really, darling, what do you want to do then? You can't hide it, and you can not stay at home for the rest of this pregnancy." He chuckled when he saw Regina actually considering it. "No- you can't, Regina."
"Fine." Regina huffed. "But I don't want to tell anyone. What if they tried to hurt our baby?"
Robin smiled as he got up on his knees and pulled her closer to the bed. "I promise I'm not going to let anything happen to you, to this baby and to Roland. I will keep this family safe." He said and leaned in to place a kiss on her belly.
Regina felt tears prick in her eyes at his words. Which she knew were speaking the truth. He wouldn't let anything happen to their family. He would keep them safe. "So, what's your plan of action then?" Regina asked softly.
"Oh, I have a great idea."
...
"This is the worst idea ever." Regina groaned as she eyed the full diner through the window of her Mercedes.
Turns out his plan was walking into the diner at rush hour in a very form fitting dress that clearly showed her stomach.
Why the hell did she comply to that?!
"No it's not, no get out if the car, darling." He chuckled and stepped out himself. Regina sighed and cursed aloud in the empty car, but then got out. Maybe she could keep on the coat she was wearing now?
They slowly walked towards the diner, Robin's hand curled around her waist. It could either be a sweet gesture, or a way to keep her from making a run for it.
The diner went silent when they stepped in, but still no one noticed her belly. After the usual minute of staring, they all want back to their food again.
"Let me take your coat." Robin smiled and grabbed ahold of the black fabric. But when he tried to pull it off, it wouldn't budge. That was when he noticed Regina's tight grip on the piece of clothing. "Regina." He said softly. "You've already come this far, I told you I'd protect you- the both of you. But this is your choice, if your really don't want to, we can leave."
Regina thought about it for a minute. Why was she so afraid? Robin told her he would protect her, she had been a Queen- no, an Evil Queen for gods sake. And just like that, her demeanor completely changed. She smiled at him and released the fabric from her grasp, letting it fall from her shoulder. Once the black coat was gone, Regina was just standing there in a tight, form fitting red dress cut off just above the knees and with long sleeves. To be honest, it had been one of the few dresses that actually fit, though this was still a strain on the zipper.
And then, just like when they'd stepped foot in the crowded diner, silence again. She was trying to look indifferent, but she could feel eyes burning holes in her stomach.
No one spoke, no one ate, no one drank.
They just stared.
And then a mighty laugh coming from behind the counter, broke the tension. "You sure know how to make an announcement." Granny chuckled as she threw the towel on the counter and stepped around it. "Congratulations to the both of you." She smiled and turned around to the crowd. "If you have nothing kind to say to them, get back to your food." She said seriously.
Regina and Robin were watching the woman in shock. Neither one of them had expected that. "Thank you." Regina said with a smile when the woman turned around again. "Oh it's quite alright, I'm happy for you two. You deserve it, after everything that has happened." Regina was so happy she hadn't actually said his name, because she was sure she couldn't handle that right now. "You've really changed, Regina."
...
"We should go get Roland." Regina smiled and stepped out of the embrace as she reached for her blouse.
"Yeah we should." He chuckled and kissed her on the lips.
...
~ The Enchanted Forest, Past. ~
"Daddy, when is Gina getting out of her room, she's been there a very long time." Roland asked for the umpteenth time that day. He poked his wooden stick into the mossy forest ground and twisted it, making small holes in the sand.
Robin sighed and lowered his bow when yet another deer escaped his vision, he didn't know what it was, but he just couldn't concentrate. Though it had nothing to do with Roland, maybe with the beautiful Queen that had locked herself in her tower. "I don't know Roland, but I think the Queen is a little upset."
"What's that?"
Robin smiled softly and crouched down in front of him. "It's when you're sad, like you were when mommy went to heaven." He tried to explain to the four year old.
Roland nodded. "Did Gina's mommy went to heaven too?"
He shook his head. "I don't think that's why she's upset, Roland."
"Then why?"
"I don't know, my boy."
"Maybe I can ask her?" Roland said with a smile, proud of his little plan.
Robin chuckled softly and kissed his son's head. "Maybe, but first let's find something to eat."
...
Regina watched how the sun went down, signaling another day's past. Another day of avoiding everyone, most of all Robin Hood. She still didn't know what to do. But telling the thief was out of the question. She couldn't handle a rejection from her true love. And that was surely what would happen if she'd told the archer his true love was the Evil Queen.
So now she was hiding.
Like a coward.
But better a coward than having her heart shattered even more.
She was already hanging on a thread as it is. That silver pin soaked in her sleeping curse was looking more and more tempting every day.
Just a little prick, just a little pressure.
"Gina?" A soft and childish voice came from the other side of her wooden door, breaking her from her depressing thoughts. Regina snapped around immediatly, frantically looking at the door. It was Roland, no doubt about it.
Should she open the door?
Or not?
"Gina? I wanna ask you something."
How could she object to that? The child had done nothing wrong, he shouldn't suffer because she was to weak or face his father ever again. And so she carefully took a measured step closer to the door. The sound of her heel clicking on cobblestone resounded throughout the large bedchamber, no where near matching the speed of her heart that was beating furiously.
"Gina!" He grinned with joy when the heavy door opened, revealing the woman he had been missing for the past two weeks. He jumped forwards and wrapped his arms around her thighs. "I missed you!"
Tears pricked in her eyes when the words registered and she shot a watery smile towards the child. "I missed you too, Roland."
The boy giggled and let go of her to walk further into the room. Regina kept staring at the door for a little while longer to calm her herself. Even though it was painful to be with a child ever since she had let go of her son, Roland was just such a sweet boy. She took one last deep breath and closed the door again. When she turned around, Roland was sitting on her large bed, his legs swinging from the edge as he stared at her with a toothy grin.
"Does your daddy know you're here, dear?" She asked in a soft tone and sighed softly when the little boy shook his head, his messy brown hair bouncing when he did.
Just like Henry's used to do...
She carefully sat down on the silk sheets, next to the young child.
"You look sad, Gina." He said softly and moved to climb up her lap.
The familiar tears returned to her brown eyes and she wrapped her arms around the small boy. She was amazed by how fast the child had wormed his way into her dark heart. "That's because I am, sweetheart."
"Why?" He asked innocently, staring up at her with his big brown eyes.
"Because I'm missing someone." And I found out my true love is your father.
"Who?"
Her watery smile was hard to maintain as she stared at the child in her arms. "My son, Henry."
"Why isn't he here with you? I'm here with my daddy." Roland asked as his brows furrowed in confusion.
"Because I had to safe him from a very evil curse, and the only to do that was for me to sent him away to live with someone else." She tried to explain.
"Oh." He said softly. "That is sad."
Regina smiled at him. "Yes it is."
There was a moment of comfortable silence before Roland finally spoke up again. "Do you want to read me a stowy, Gina?"
Regina chuckled softly. "Only this once, it's already passed your bedtime, dear."
And so she picked up the little boy and placed him on her hip as she stepped outside of her room for the first time in two weeks. All because a little boy wanted a story.
She guessed those maternal feelings would never really leave, even though she no longer had a child.
...
~ Storybrooke, Present. ~
"What happened?" Regina asked as she stepped inside of the hospital room. Emma was sitting in the chair next to the bed. A bed that was currently being used by an unconscious Neal Cassidy. "You found him?"
Emma stood up and rubbed her tired eyes. "Not really, he just stumbled inside Gold's shop. Belle and Hook brought him here."
"Is he alive?"
Emma nodded. "Yes he is, he's just resting, he was exhausted and dehydrated."
"Good." Regina sighed in relief and fully stepped inside the room, closing the door behind her.
"We also found Gold, but there was something very wrong with him."
Regina furrowed her eyebrows in confusion as she leaned back against the wall. "How do you mean 'wrong'?"
"I don't know exactly." Emma shrugged. "He was talking about having too many voices in his head and then he just took off, I tried to catch him but it was like he had just vanished into thin air."
Regina nodded slowly. That was strange. Not as strange as the fact that her former mentor, whom she had seen dying right in front of her eyes, came back to life, but still... It came pretty damn close. "Did Neal tell you anything before he passed out."
"No, he doesn't remember anything besides me and Henry driving over the town line just before the curse. He did say that he wanted to meet Henry so as to maybe jog his memory."
Regina cocked her head slightly. "And you don't think that that's a good idea?"
Emma sighed as she dropped back into the chair. "I don't know."
The wheels in Regina's head started turning as she shot an accusing glare towards the blonde bounty hunter. "You want to take him away again after this witch is defeated, don't you? You don't want him to remember."
"He was happy, Regina." Emma tried. "I would think you'd understand that."
"I do, Emma. But I'm his mother!"
"You know, I'm really beginning to regret ever drinking that potion." Emma sighed and stared at Neal's sleeping form. "We were living a happy, normal life without all this fairytale shit. But I'd never thought you would want to take that away from him, you were the one that gave us the memories in the first place."
"Don't you think I was angry at first when you two came back strolling into this damn town? It's dangerous here, Emma. Don't out understand that I was actually hoping you and Henry would stay away, even though it hurt me immensely that I would never be able to see my son again." Regina said in a desperate whisper. "But now he's here, and I'm starting to realize that it's wrong to let him live a cursed life forever. Maybe I'm being selfish, but he's my son, I want him to remember me, can't you understand that, Emma?"
Emma closed her eyes and let out a shuddering breath. Regina was right, it was wrong to let him live a cursed life, though it was the life she'd always wanted for herself. But she had to think of Henry now too, and Emma was sure that he would want to remember his brunette mother too.
"Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry."
...
That night...
The phone rang loudly throughout the Hood-Mills residence. "Roland, could you please bring mommy the phone, sweetie?" Regina asked the boy that was sitting at the breakfast bar and put the knife down. "My hands are covered in tomatoes."
Roland giggled and got off the chair. "Of course, mommy."
Regina quickly washed and dried her hands, just in time to grab the phone Roland was handing her. She leaned down and placed a soft kiss on his hair before answering. "Regina Mills."
"Regina, it's me, Emma." The blonde sounded distressed and Regina immediately got the sense that something was wrong. Very, very wrong.
"Emma? What happened? Did something happen to Henry?"
"No, no!" She answered quickly. "Nothing like that, it's just- it's about Neal."
"What happened to him?"
"He- he's dead."
Regina could hear that the blonde was crying. "Oh, that's horrible, I'm sorry Emma."
"Yeah, thanks. I just wanted to let you know that he is dead because he was the one that brought Gold back to life."
"So that's why he's back?"
"Yeah, but he's being held captive by Zelena." She said softly. "We found out she's The Wicked Witch."
"Zelena? You mean the redhead?" Regina asked as she tried to conjure up a mental image of the woman. Yes, she remembered Zelena, the woman was a strange one, she had even stopped by her table once to tell her she was a midwife in the other land, and offered to help with the baby, but Regina had quickly sent her on her way. As if she would be that naive.
"Yes, that one. Anyway I need to go and tell my parents."
"And what are you going to tell Henry?" The question was out before Regina could think about it.
"I guess I'm going to tell him the truth."
...
Zelena scoffed inwardly as she twisted the large dagger in her hand. The metal glistened in the tl-light. The 'Rumplestitskin' written in black jagged handwriting was giving her a sense of pride. It showed exactly who - or better said, what she owned.
The dark one was under her rule. He had no choice but to do exactly what she wanted. She and she alone.
"I would never get Regina's baby?" She asked in a mocking tone into the empty room. "Really Rumple? I would never get my sister's baby?"
"You made a big mistake in picking her." She said furiously into the darkness. She was talking, even though no one was listening.
"I'll take take that baby just as easily as I took this dagger."
...
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